


Recapturing Lightning

by SnilyAlways775344



Series: Recapturing Lightning [1]
Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: F/M, Intimacy, Sex
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-11-05
Updated: 2019-08-03
Packaged: 2019-08-19 07:46:18
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 9
Words: 96,741
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16530392
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SnilyAlways775344/pseuds/SnilyAlways775344
Summary: It's 1991 and Severus receives the shock of his life.  Lily is alive and he's a father!  Instant family, right?  Yes - and no.  With the added pressures of the events of Harry's first year at Hogwarts thrown in, how will they cope?  This will be as much a Severus/Lily story as it is a Harry Potter story, meaning it will focus on their relationship as much as it will Harry's adventures.NOTE: Updates will be sporadic as I am currently writing 3-4 other stories simultaneously.  The Intimacy/Sex tags are there for a reason.  There will be some detail in the scenes, not overly graphic (I don't think) but it may not be to others' taste.  Feel free to skip them.





	1. Finally Home

“ _ **For the two of us, home isn't a place. It is a person. And we are finally home.”**_ _ **  
**_ _ **―**_ _ **Stephanie Perkins,**_[ _ **Anna and the French Kiss**_](https://www.goodreads.com/work/quotes/7168450)

 

 

“Sev?”

The hesitant voice had Severus spinning to his left, well, not so much the hesitancy, but the voice itself, as well as the shortened version of his name. Only one person had ever called him that – and she stood in front of him. His face turned chalky white. No. This had to be a trick. Lily was gone! She absolutely could _not_ be there with him. Tightly gripping the book he held, he glared at the person pretending to be the only person he'd ever loved.

“Who are you? What game are you playing?”

“No games, Sev. It's me. It's really me. I wanted to write to you but thought you wouldn't believe me without seeing me in person.”

“I do not believe you even now. Lily is gone. She has been for ten years.”

Not wanting to be near the imposter for another second, Severus left the woman where she stood. A few shelves over and out of sight, he leaned against the wall and wrestled to get his trembling under control. He missed Lily with every fiber of his being, missed her every day. Lily's absence had left a hole in his heart, in his soul, that could never be filled. Who would play a cruel joke such as this? Any number of remaining Death Eaters, that's who. They had not been pleased to learn he had spied on them for Dumbledore nearly two years before the Dark Lord's disappearance. Severus did not think it above any of his former associates to find someone who could imitate Lily; they all knew he had loved her, despite the circumstances of her birth. He'd never truly believed that nonsense about pure blood being better than anyone. He, himself, was only a half-blood and his skills at potions were nearly unrivaled. No, he did not hold the same beliefs, but with his cruel upbringing and no acceptance amongst his peers – Lily being the exception – he was an easy target and fell into that crowd. Severus pinched the bridge of his nose, eyes closed, as he fought against the memories of cruelty and darkness that threatened to overtake him.

“Severus Hadrian Snape, please listen to me.”

Severus' hand dropped as he stared at the woman, speechless. He had only ever told one person his middle name. His father had chosen that name, and Severus hated it, hated anything to do with the man. Lily would never have disclosed that information. Severus studied the woman with the entreating expression. Her hair was the correct shade of red, but that was simple enough to mimic. Her eyes – those beautiful green eyes that he'd always loved – would have been harder to copy, but this woman's matched his memory of Lily's eyes. Could it really be his Lily? Severus ruthlessly forced down the bit of hope that attempted to take root in his chest.

“You have my attention. I suggest you speak quickly.”

“I know this is hard for you, but I really am Lily. That Halloween night, James had just died. I thought I was going to die, too, but I didn't. Or maybe I did, and something brought me back. I don't know. All I know is, when I regained consciousness, Harry was sitting in his cot, bleeding from a jagged cut on his forehead and Voldemort was gone without a trace. The cottage was torn apart. I feared for Harry's safety, so I took him and ran.”

Jealousy churned in Severus' stomach at the mention of her son. He had heard she had married Potter and had borne him a son soon after. The thought of any man touching her the way he had made him want to snarl and throw curses at anyone or anything. He did nothing except stand still and forcefully regulated his breathing. He had made his choices, and she had made hers. Now, it seemed, he was going to be seeing a lot of Potter's spawn if she stayed.

Crossing his arms over his chest, he looked down at the woman, not quite believing her story, no matter how plausible it may have sounded. “How did we meet?”

The woman who looked like Lily smiled. “We met when we were kids, nine years old, in fact. You didn't live far from me in Cokeworth. You found me showing my sister what I could do. You told me it was a Levitation Charm and that I was a witch.” She gave that familiar chuckle that always made Severus want to smile. “You didn't like Petunia, which was just as well because she didn't like you either. She was often very rude to us, especially to you. I realized later that she was jealous of our abilities.”

Hardly daring to breathe, Severus hesitantly reached out a hand to touch her, afraid to believe her and afraid not to. Staring into her eyes, he brushed her mind tentatively, searching for the truth. He swallowed past the lump lodged in his throat and whispered, “Lily? Lils?”

Only Severus' fierce control kept him from shedding the tears filling his eyes when Lily took his still-trembling hand and brought it to her cheek. Her skin felt just as soft as it always had. He thumbed away a tear that trickled down that cheek. Sliding his fingers into her silky smooth hair, he cupped her head and pulled her close, burying his nose into her tresses and inhaling, finding the expected scent of raspberries. She had always smelled of raspberries. Her arms wrapped around his waist and Severus reveled in the feel of them. His breath hitched as he clung to her, not wanting to let her go now that he had her back, not even to swipe at the tear now trailing down his cheek.

“Oh, Lils, I have missed you.”

“I've missed you, too, Sev.” Her hands rose to cup his face as she looked up at him, her eyes flicking over his features. “You've changed, but only some.”

Her fingers toyed with his hair, and Severus found himself grateful for not having brewed that morning; otherwise, it would have been somewhat greasy from the tonic he used to protect it against the heat and fumes. She gave him a playful grin.

“It's longer by, what, two, three inches.” She ran her fingertips down a lock of his hair which ended just past his shoulders. “I like it. It suits you. I've always loved your hair. As dark as a raven's wing.”

Severus' jaw tightened. “As black as my soul.”

Lily's hands fell to his shoulders, giving him a little shake, her playful demeanor vanishing. “I don't believe that for a second, no matter what you may have done in the past. You are still a good person, Severus. You're forgetting. I can see past all of the barriers you raise, past the front you present to the outside world. I _will_ make you believe you're still good if it's the last thing I do. That's a conversation for another time, however.”

Uncertain how to respond to her once-familiar fierce defense of him, Severus studied his Lily, taking careful note of everything about her. She, too, had changed somewhat, but then, he supposed ten years would do that to a person. “Do you have the time to discuss your … return?”

“Yes. Harry and I were – oh Merlin, you need to know about Harry!”

Severus worked hard to keep his face and tone neutral. “Harry is your son. You had him soon after marrying Potter. There is not much more to know.”

Lily's expression turned fierce as she locked her hands at the nape of his neck. “Yes, there is. Do the math. Harry was born at the end of July, and he was carried full term, which means his conception was …”

Severus' mind raced backward through the calendar and landed on … “October.” He could not believe it and raced backward through the months again to be certain. The last time he had been with Lily had been in October 1979 – a full two months _before_ she had married Potter. Every bit of moisture in his mouth and throat evaporated like a raindrop in the Sahara Desert. His voice, normally a smooth baritone, came out raspy. “Are you saying …?” He swallowed, though it didn't help. “Am I …? Is Harry …?”

Lily nodded, an uncertain smile on her face. “Harry is _your_ son, Sev. I was already pregnant when I married James.”

Reeling from that tidbit, Severus stepped away from his childhood love, rubbing a hand over his eyes, it sliding lower to his nose and mouth, then upward through his hair. He had a son. He had a son! A son whose existence he had never known! Lily had kept his son from him for ten years! Just like that, his voice returned to the hard, unforgiving version his students were all too familiar with.

Pinning her with one of his trademark glares, he bit out, “Why? Why have you kept him from me until now? If he is even mine.”

“Severus, please. Let's go and talk. It's a long story and I'd rather we had more privacy than this. I don't want to have to keep casting Privacy Charms. And Harry _is_ yours. You'll know it as soon as you see him.”

With a jolt, Severus looked around, realizing not one person had walked near them, and the bookshop had a lot of patrons. He mentally castigated himself for not putting up the charm himself when Lily had sought him out the second time. Her last sentence caught up to his overtaxed mind, and his gaze instantly sought hers. What had she meant by that? Maybe the boy resembled him a little? His younger self would have gloated over the fact Potter had to look at Harry and know the boy belonged to another man. Now that he could see the world wasn't so black and white, he could appreciate the awkward position Potter must have endured and still attempted to protect Lily and her son.

“He looks just like you did at his age, Sev.” By her beaming smile, Severus could see the idea did not bother her at all. “He has my eyes and my ears, but that's about it. Everything else screams you, from his black hair – which he chooses to wear a bit long – to his nose, his lips, his bone structure and build. It's all you.”

His _nose_? The poor kid. Severus felt the need to apologize to the boy on sight. “Shall we find him, then? I cannot believe you let him wander the shop. His scar is well-known and is bound to be recognized.”

Lily frowned, her eyes glinting with her awakening temper. “Oh, do give me some credit, Severus. The only ones who can see his scar are you, me, and him. Wait a minute. How did you know the cut on his forehead left a scar? How does anyone?”

One of Severus' brows rose. “You do not know, and yet, you Charmed it to be hidden to all but a few?”

“It's an unusual mark. I didn't want people staring. Come on, let's go find him. More than likely, he's still in the Charms section, looking for books on Magical Theory.”

“Is that not above his level of understanding?”

“It is, but he still reads the books. He's a voracious reader.” The two of them began walking in that direction. “To be honest, I'm a bit surprised he didn't head directly for the Potions section; he's helped me prepare ingredients for years now and is looking forward to actually brewing. He's read nearly every Potions book on his level and a few above it.”

Something akin to pride swelled inside Severus' chest, curling his lips into a genuine smile. His son found potions an interesting study. _His son_ looked forward to brewing. Those two words still boggled his mind. Severus _I hate snot-nosed brats, why am I teaching?_ Snape had a son. How could he be a father when he had no good role model? Lily had to be mad even to let him near Harry. He'd probably do more harm than good.

“Found him.”

Lily's quiet voice drew Severus from his thoughts. Looking at the child sitting with his back against the wall, entirely focused on the book he held, Severus gasped. She hadn't exaggerated. From what he could see, Harry could have passed for himself from a distance! He hung back, not wanting to intrude, as Lily went to collect her, no, _their_ son. The smile Harry bestowed upon Lily definitely belonged to his mother. She must have mentioned him because the boy's gaze lifted and quickly searched the shop until they landed on him. Her eyes in his face hit him like a punch to his stomach, bringing the reality of the situation to him like nothing else, despite having already acknowledged the boy was a near-copy of his young self.

The pair stood and made their way toward the front to pay for the book in Harry's hand. Realizing he still had the book he had been perusing when Lily had first found him, Severus followed. Harry did, indeed, have a book on Magical Theory, focusing on spell creation. Severus would be surprised if the boy understood anything he read, but he had to give Lily credit for encouraging Harry to expand his knowledge, to stretch his understanding as far as he possibly could.

Once the texts were bought, the trio stepped back onto Diagon Alley. Before he could think twice, Severus blurted, “Come to Hogwarts with me. We can talk, uninterrupted, there. I will request an elf to bring us lunch in my quarters.”

“Alright.”

From the Leaky Cauldron, they Floo'd to The Three Broomsticks. With a nod, Severus greeted Rosmerta before ushering Lily and Harry through the pub and to the street. In a short time, they reached the Hogwarts gate, Harry emitting a sound of awe, which had Severus meeting Lily's gaze with an amused smile, both remembering their reactions upon first seeing the castle. Since it was mostly empty, they met no one on their way inside or to the stairs leading down into the dungeons.

Lily chuckled. “Still living in the dungeons, I see.”

Smirking, Severus drawled, “Where else would the Head of Slytherin House reside?”

“You made Head of House? When?”

“When I first agreed to take the Potions position nine years ago.”

Severus took the lead as they passed through corridor after corridor. Though he and Lily had been very close, she had never dared enter the dungeons. Though no one could see it, he grinned when she made a comment about already being lost. The spell continued to work. That was his own little creation. It prevented anyone who didn't have a legitimate reason for being in Slytherin territory from finding the common room or stumbling upon his private rooms, the Potions classroom not included in the spell.

“I will have to remember to key you and Harry into the spell signature so you will not be lost.”

“This confusion is your doing? You created a spell for this?”

Reaching the door to his chambers, Severus pulled his wand from his sleeve and tapped the door twice. Looking over Harry's head to Lily, he raised a brow – to Harry's apparent delight – and said, “It keeps brash Gryffindors from finding themselves in trouble.”

In retaliation, Lily smacked his upper arm. “Oh, hush! Just because I wanted to come down past the Potions lab doesn't mean I would have. I wasn't stupid.”

“No. You may have been many things, but stupid was not one of them." Stepping across the corridor to the opposite wall, Severus tapped one of the stones and muttered under his breath. "You will now be able to find your way back should you choose to wander."

With a curious tilt to her head, Lily asked, “What did that do?”

“At the beginning and end of each corridor, a stone glows with locations inscribed on it, complete with directional arrows. I grew tired of first-years coming to me, blubbering, because they were lost. The charm has eliminated that issue."

“Oh, you poor thing.”

The way Lily said it told Severus she felt no sympathy for him whatsoever. Pressing his lips together to prevent the smile that wanted to come, he opened the door to his private rooms. Calling one of the house-elves, he requested lunch be served for the three of them there. Once it arrived, they sat at the table, making small talk. Lily chastised him for the reputation he'd garnered over the years, to which Severus scowled and claimed it kept the students in line. Harry concentrated on his meal, speaking only when asked a direct question. At one particular question, Harry looked at his mum with a sarcastically disbelieving expression with which Severus was all too familiar. Unfortunately for him, it had come just as he'd taken a drink, causing him to choke.

Lily merely laughed. “Recognize that expression, do you? You certainly should.” Severus' response was a lift of his own brow.

After lunch, Severus studied his son a moment before leaving the table to retrieve a potions book he thought Harry would enjoy. Taking it back to the table, he held it out to the boy and nearly chuckled at Harry's rounded gaze.

“You have that one?! I've been looking for that one for ages! How did you get it?”

“It helps to have connections. You may read it.”

“Thank you!” Harry gingerly took the book and retreated to the sitting room to read.

“Smart move,” Lily quipped.

Severus felt his cheeks heat and turned away to prepare some tea. “You mentioned he enjoyed reading potions books. I knew that one was hard to find and assumed it was one he had yet to read.” The tea finished, he brought it to the table. “Tell me everything.”

“First, you need to know that James was nothing more to me than a friend. We never … he never … touched me in that way. He knew I loved you. I was pregnant and alone. I was afraid to go to you, not because I was afraid _of_ you, but _for_ you, as well as for our child. I feared Voldemort would torture you for daring to be with me, and I couldn't do that to you, Sev.”

The idea that Potter never had… It seemed inconceivable. Especially so, considering how the man had felt for Lily. It had been obvious. Severus mused over the rest of her comment and nodded, eyes on his tea. “The Dark Lord likely would have done so for being careless in my liaisons.” A shaky inhale from across the table sent his gaze flying to Lily's. Reading the hurt in her eyes, he leaned forward, arms on the table. “Lily, you were the only one for me. Ever. When you vanished, a piece of me went with you. I had absolutely no interest in sharing that with anyone else.” He slid an open hand in her direction.

Lily accepted the gesture, placing her hand in his. “That's good to know. There's not been anyone else for me, either.”

Severus closed his hand around Lily's and, on impulse, lightly brushed his lips across her palm, hoping she did not think it presumptuous of him. A sudden longing to have her lips on his filled him, but he knew there would be no acting on _that_ desire any time soon. Not at all, if she pulled her hand away. Lily may have said there had been no one else, it did not mean she still loved him. Her fingers splayed to cup his cheek, her thumb lightly tracing the bridge of his nose, and the tender, loving look in her eyes was the expression she had always saved for him alone. They would get a second chance. The thought closed his throat, and his vision swam.

Knowing there was still much to discuss, Severus gave her palm a final kiss before letting their hands fall to the table. “Lils, how much does Harry know? Is he aware of the … Dark … things I have done?”

“Everything I know, he knows. I wasn't going to keep it from him. He understands you made bad choices and that you regret them.”

Severus sighed, unsure whether to be upset or disappointed. "You minimized my actions."

“I didn't. Naturally, I didn't tell him specifics of what you probably had to do, but he knows you became one of Voldemort's followers. He knows why you felt you needed to do it, though that is hard for him to understand, not having experienced what you did growing up.”

“For which I am eternally grateful. He knows this and is … accepting of me?”

“He is. It'll just take time for him to get to know you. He's a bit quiet by nature.” Lily smirked a bit. “Wonder where that comes from?”

Severus tried to scowl but ended up smiling instead. “Hush, you. So, I understand why you took Harry and left, but why did you not contact me once my efforts of spying were splashed across every newspaper or magazine in Britain?”

“Simple. We weren't in Britain. I took Harry to Spain. Lloret de Mar, to be exact. It's a good size place without being huge. Enough people to get lost in but not enough to be overwhelming. There's a beach, a castle – which isn't nearly as impressive as Hogwarts – a somewhat small Wizarding population. Plenty of things for Harry to enjoy. We didn't get much news from Britain. I had no clue about your spying until a tourist came and told me everything. As soon as I heard, I knew we'd be coming back. It took a month to get everything in order.”

“Uprooting Harry so suddenly could not have been easy for him.”

“It wasn't. We had a big row over it, but he eventually agreed. He may not admit it, but he really wanted to meet you.”

“And so he has. I fear I may be a disappointment to him. I do not know how to be a father, Lily.”

“You'll figure it out, and you'll have me to help along the way. You're already off to a good start with that book.”

Severus snorted. “That was easy enough to solve. Give children books to read and they are quiet.”

“That only works if said children enjoy reading.”

Severus lifted a brow. “I have never had an issue.”

This time Lily snorted. “Yes, I've heard all about your tactics, remember? It's amazing what you hear when someone thinks you're new and your son is starting at Hogwarts. Really, Severus? Taunting of children?”

Feeling like a naughty child under her censoring gaze, Severus grumbled, “They pay attention.”

“Sure, because they're too terrified to do anything else. You can do better than that. I _expect_ better than that from you. Impart your knowledge in a pleasant way, and you may just find the next Potions Master or Mistress."

“My methods may be harsh, but they are effective." Severus glanced toward the sitting room. "Perhaps I could make a few changes."

“Well, not all at once, now. If you did that, you'd give all your students heart attacks.”

Severus sneered. “Very funny. Your wit remains as sharp as ever.”

“And you are as snarky as ever, but then, I wouldn't have you any other way.”

Despite himself, he felt a smile tug at his lips. He had missed their verbal sparring matches. After a little prompting, Lily retold what she remembered that Halloween night and of her subsequent actions. Severus, angry to learn Dumbledore had known she was well and elected not to tell him, paced his dining area, hands clenched behind his back, mentally haranguing the Headmaster. This went on for only a minute before Severus' pacing was interrupted, his temper cooled by a simple touch.

Holding her hand against his cheek, he leaned into the touch and gazed into the green eyes of the woman he'd loved so much. "He had no right to keep that from me."

“Maybe not, but I left it to his discretion. Did we play our parts too well? Maybe he believed we hated each other.”

“No. The Headmaster has been very much aware of my feelings for you."

“Then, he must have had his reasons for not saying anything. That man is as wily as they come, always thinking three steps ahead of everyone else. If anyone should have been a Slytherin, it's Albus Dumbledore.”

The mental image of the highly-revered leader coming from Severus' House had him chuckling. That would teach the idiotic fools to believe the stereotypes. “I certainly agree with that. Unfortunately, if he had been, it is likely he would not have the influence he does now.”

Lily gave him an exaggerated look of shock. “Are you saying Dumbledore isn't cunning enough to have figured out a way to get where he is if he had come from Slytherin?”

Mildly annoyed, Severus huffed. “I said no such thing. You are making assumptions. I am well aware of the Headmaster's sly maneuverings and capabilities.” From Lily's grin, Severus knew she had baited him, and he had fallen for it as he always had. “Retribution is coming. You have been warned.”

Lily merely laughed. “It's not my fault you don't know a baited hook when you see or hear one.”

Making an irritated sound, Severus drew Lily close, forehead resting on the top of her head. His softly spoken words stated threat, but even he heard the tinge of amusement in his tone. “My skills have improved over the years, Lils. You would do well to remember that.”

“Yes, well, so have mine.”

Lily's breathy response amplified Severus' awareness of how close they stood to each other, especially now that Lily had lifted her head a bit to look up at him when she spoke. Swallowing, he focused on keeping his breathing even, despite the urge to bridge the gap between them and satisfy the need to feel her lips against his again. _Not now_ played repeatedly in his head. If he kissed her now, he feared he would never stop – and kissing would not be the only activity they engaged in, either. No, best to deny himself that experience until they had more time and more privacy. He just had no idea it would be so difficult.

In any event, Severus' self-control received a boost when his Floo activated, and a voice called out. "Severus, are you there? Oh, hello, there. What's your name?"

Severus all but leaped away from Lily to answer the call. Kneeling in front of his fireplace, he greeted the medi-witch. "Hello, Poppy. Am I to assume you have inventoried your stock and have made a note of the potions you need for the school year?"

“Yes, but it can wait if you're busy.”

“No need.” Ignoring the curiosity in the matron's voice, Severus nonverbally and wandlessly Summoned a stack of parchment and Self-Inking quill from a side table across the room, the corner of his lips curling upward at his son's awed exclamation. “Which potions do you need from me?”

The matron rattled off a very long list. “I know it's a lot to ask of you, Severus, but my stores are nearly depleted. Between the hard-hitting flu last year and that dunce of a Defense Against the Dark Arts professor, Kingfisher, I don't have that much left. I know I should have said something sooner and I'm sorry.”

“No need for apologies. I know you have been away this last month. You will get your potions on time.”

“Thank you.” Poppy's head disappeared, the green flames dying away soon after.

“That's quite a list.”

Severus looked up from the parchment at Lily's comment as he stood. “It is usually not this extensive. The flu hit the majority of the student population last year, as well as a few of the staff. The Headmaster's hiring choice for Defense left a lot to be desired, bumbling idiot that he was.”

“Why would Dumbledore hire someone so inept?”

Severus snorted derisively. “He believes the position to be cursed. None of the professors have lasted for longer than one year. Perhaps, he is correct in his belief.”

“Cursed, Sev? Really? How could a teaching position be cursed?”

Oddly irritated with her skepticism he snapped, "I do not know, Lils. The Headmaster does not share everything with me." Gathering himself, Severus slowly exhaled. "I need to inventory my ingredients to be assured I have enough for the batches needed. Another trip to Diagon Alley may be warranted. Once I have checked my stores, we can talk with the Headmaster. He should be made aware of your return."

Focused on his list, Severus entered his personal lab, located to the right of the fireplace, and set to work.

 

SSLE

 

Lily watched Severus enter his lab, not the least put out by his surliness. She knew very well his temper flared when he was feeling overwhelmed or unsettled, a direct correlation to the childhood he had survived. She couldn't imagine how it must be for him to see her after all this time of thinking her lost, and then, to find out he was a father on top of it all. He still loved her, though. He'd shown her that several times already. She couldn't help wondering, if Harry had been elsewhere, whether Severus would have kissed her. She certainly wanted him to and had almost initiated the contact when the Floo had activated. Being held by him again had felt just as amazing as it had so long ago, and she anticipated being in that position many more times in the future.

Shaking off her reverie, she noticed Harry looking at the closed lab door and, wondering what he was thinking, settled next to him on the sofa. “How are you, sweetheart?”

Harry tilted his head in the door's direction. “Is he always so …”

“Prickly?”

“Formal is what I was going to say, but yeah, prickly works too.”

“Formal?" Lily had an idea what Harry meant but wanted to be certain she understood him correctly.

“His speech, his tone.”

That's what she thought he meant. Not wanting to divulge too much of Severus' past, she circled around the topic, hoping that was good enough. “It stems from the way he grew up. He didn't have a good childhood, Harry. Then, with the decisions he made, I imagine he learned to keep people at bay with his temper. You have to remember that you're not the only one who's had his life completely changed. For someone like Sev, it will take a little time for him to adjust. Just try to give him that, okay?”

“Okay. I'll try.”

Giving Harry a little squeeze, she said, “I know you will.”

After a moment of silence, Harry looked up at her, eyes round. “Did you see him Summon the parchment and quill? He didn't say anything or use his wand!”

“I did. Your dad is quite gifted. He mastered nonverbal spellcasting just out of Hogwarts. The wandless spellcasting is new to me, though not surprising.”

“Do you think I could do it?”

“I believe you can do anything you want if you try hard enough.” Catching Harry's speculative gaze, she asked, “What?”

“You seem different. Happier.”

Floored at Harry's perception, Lily didn't know what to say other than the truth. How did you tell your nearly-eleven-year-old son that you were happier than you had been in ten years just because you were back with the person you'd never stopped loving and discovered that person still loved you? As mature as Harry could be at times, she didn't think he'd understand too well if she attempted to explain it to him.

“I guess it's being back here at Hogwarts. This was the first place I felt I belonged anywhere.”

Harry smirked up at her and tilted his head in the direction of the lab. “Or maybe it's because _he's_ here. I know you still love him. I've known that for a long time. It's been kind of obvious.”

Or perhaps he would understand, at least a little. If she could have done the eyebrow thing, she certainly would have. Mussing Harry's somewhat shaggy hair, Lily grinned. “Maybe that's a part of it. I know you haven't seen much of Hogwarts yet, but what do you think? Do you think you'll enjoy going to school here?”

Harry shrugged. “Maybe. It would be kind of brilliant to have school in a castle. It certainly looks like I'll get plenty of exercise. How many floors are there, again?”

“Seven, but you'll adjust quickly. Especially if you are Sorted into Gryffindor. The entrance to the tower is on the seventh floor. Imagine having to go up and down all those stairs every day.”

“What if I'm not in Gryffindor? Would you be disappointed?”

Turning to face her son fully, Lily cupped Harry's chin so she could maintain eye contact when she spoke. “Sweetheart, it doesn't matter what House you're placed in. I will love you just the same.”

“Do you think … do you think he would be okay with me being in Gryffindor?”

Lily smiled down at her son, running a hand through his long locks. “I'm sure he would be fine with it.”

“What do I even call him, Mum? I can't keep saying _him_ or _he_ or whatever. I mean, I'd like to call him _Dad,_ but would he be okay with that? I don't want him running for the hills the instant I say it.”

“That's a question you should ask him. Try not to be upset if he balks at the idea of _Dad._ ” Lily thought quickly and made her decision. “Honestly, I think the idea of being a father terrifies him because his own was a terrible person. I think Sev's afraid of being like his father.”

Harry seemed a little disappointed, and his words confirmed Lily's suspicions. "So, he probably won't want to be called _Dad_ , then.”

“Ask him. If you just asked him, outright, he would appreciate that. You'll find that your dad can be blunt sometimes and appreciates the same from others. If it helps, I'll even disappear for a bit so you can be alone when you ask him. How about this? When he comes back, I'll go to the loo. You can ask him then."

“Okay.”

True to her word, when the lab door started to open, Lily gave Harry a reassuring squeeze before disappearing down the hallway where she'd assumed she'd find the loo. Nervously, she chewed a knuckle as she imagined her son asking that question and hoped Sev fully accepted the title.

 

SSLE

 

Severus exited his lab with a list of ingredients he needed to get from the apothecary on Diagon Alley, finding only Harry sitting on the sofa watching him. The situation made Severus feel awkward, as he didn't know what to do or say to the boy. He wanted to say the right things; he just didn't know what those things were. When Harry stood, facing him fully, determined look in his green eyes, Severus felt a moment of panic. What was he supposed to do?

“I have a question, if I may ask it.”

Feeling his palms begin to sweat, Severus hid them behind his back and gave a single nod. "You may."

“What should I call you?”

The question threw Severus completely. Embarrassed at having been completely rendered speechless by a child, he hid behind a curtain of hair and moved across the room to lay the list he carried onto the side table from which he had Summoned the parchment and quill. He paused a moment or two before facing Harry. Severus studied the boy who resembled him so strongly. He wanted to be a father to his son, that much he figured out, but he did not know the first thing about what made a good father.

“What would you prefer?”

Severus swore he saw a bit of humor in the boy's green eyes as he rattled off different suggestions. “Well, there's _Dad_ , of course.”

“That would be … acceptable.”

“But there's also _Father_.”

Severus' jaw muscle worked at that suggestion, the term bringing up memories of his own father, as well as the coldness of the Malfoys. “I think not.”

“Okay, well, there's _Pa_ or even _Daddy_.”

Now Severus knew the boy was having a bit of fun and his lips twitched. "Call me either of those, and you will be forever known as an impudent little brat." When Harry's brow arched, Severus muttered, "You may still be."

Harry's snicker warmed Severus' heart. He had managed to do something right. His sense of humor, he knew, tended to run more towards sarcastic than humorous, and had hoped he had not upset the boy. As Lily re-entered the sitting room, trying her hardest to stifle a smile, Severus had the feeling her vanishing act had been a ruse. Taking a page from his son's book, as they said, Severus raised a brow in her direction, eliciting laughter from mother and son.

“We should speak with the Headmaster. Then, I need to return to Diagon Alley to purchase enough ingredients for the potions Poppy needs.”

“Planning on leaving us behind, Sev?”

Severus snorted. "As if I could do so, even if that were what I desired. You forget. I know you, Lils. You would merely follow me there."

Lily stepped behind Harry, draping her arms across his chest. “That's right. Don't you forget it.”

“Obviously, I have not." Severus shook his head in exasperation, though a small smile still remained. "One time. One time I make that mistake, and I am forever hounded."

As they climbed the dungeon stairs, Lily continued their conversation, obviously enjoying herself, as Harry's amused gaze bounced between them. “Yes, well, you should have known better.”

Severus sighed through his nose, knowing he would not get the last word. “Forgive my thirteen-year-old self's lack of sound judgment.”

Lily, grinning madly, quipped, “I knew you'd agree with me if I kept at it long enough.”

Grunting, Severus continued to climb the stairs, but was taken off guard when her lips made contact with his cheek, sending delicious little tingles down his back and limbs, his heart pounding so fiercely, he was certain Lily could hear it. Stopping on the stairs, he faced Lily fully, half-aware that Harry continued on.

“You make it so easy to needle you, Sev.”

“Only because I know you mean nothing by it.”

“Of course, I don't.”

Standing in the stairwell, with her one step above him bringing her closer to his height, the light from the sconces highlighting her dark red hair and dancing across her face, Severus, a moth to her proverbial flame, leaned forward, one hand rising to thread itself into the hair at her temple. His dark gaze centered on her pale pink lips as he drew closer to them, the need to discover whether they tasted as he remembered overriding his common sense, as well as his sense of propriety. At almost the last moment, his eyes drifted closed in sweet anticipation but flew open again as he jerked away upon hearing a very familiar, inquisitive voice.

“You there, child. What's your name?”

“Harry, ma'am.”

“Harry? And what are you doing here at Hogwarts? Who are you with? Wait. That scar. You're not … You can't be … Potter? But, you look more like …”

The exchange startled Severus so badly he stepped backward and would have tumbled down the stairs had Lily not grabbed his hand to steady him. Gripping Lily's hand, he raced up the remaining stairs to find Minerva standing, awestruck, over Harry, who looked distinctly uncomfortable.

“Minerva.”

The Deputy Headmistress turned her shocked gaze his way, and Severus thought the woman would faint. "Lily?"

“It's me, Professor. Harry's with me.”

“With _us_ ,” Severus corrected, glancing down at the woman beside him. Facing his colleague once more, he added, “As you have noticed, there is a misconception as to Harry's identity. One I intend to rectify. We were on our way to see the Headmaster. Perhaps you would care to join us?”

Minerva's wide green gaze bounced from him to Lily, to her hand clasped in his, to Harry, and back to Severus. “I think I will.”

The walk up to the Headmaster's office turned into an abbreviated tour of the castle for Harry. After allowing him a few moments to peek into the Great Hall, they pointed out the classrooms along the way. Or, Severus did. Minerva and Lily engaged in small talk – until Harry opened his mouth with a question.

“Dad, is it true the Slytherin House Ghost is called The Bloody Baron?”

Noticing Lily's impish grin and Minerva's incredulous expression, Severus smirked. That was the first time Harry had called him by that title – never mind that it had only been settled minutes ago – and Severus rather enjoyed hearing it, much to his surprise. "It is. He rarely speaks. There is a poltergeist by the name of Peeves who enjoys pulling pranks on the students. Threaten him with The Bloody Baron, and he will leave you alone."

“Is that why he never bothers you?”

Severus responded with a disbelieving look at his colleague. “You have been Head of Gryffindor House for how long and you did not know? A simple questioning of the House Ghosts would have revealed that.”

Looking a bit perturbed, Minerva huffed. “Well, who thinks to ask the House Ghosts?”

With a satisfied smirk, Severus drawled, “I, apparently, am the only one.”

“Any other secret knowledge you care to share?”

“Minerva, I would think by now you would know that a Slytherin never divulges all of his secrets.”

Minerva rolled her eyes, then shot glances at Lily and Harry. “And, apparently, you're keeping some big ones.”

“Don't be upset with Severus, Professor. He only found out about Harry and me today. He was just as shocked as you are. If you want to be upset with someone, be upset with Professor Dumbledore. He knew I was fine and chose not to tell anyone.”

Severus tried to keep a lid on his irritation over that, but, as usual, he had been unable to hide it from Lily. Her thumb rubbed soothing circles over the back of his hand, her other hand coming up to rest lightly at his elbow. He still marveled at how she could understand what he needed and when from the time they were kids. His temper pacified, Severus gently squeezed the hand he held, giving Lily a soft smile of appreciation, unaware his colleague witnessed their silent exchange and was amazed at the tender expression gracing the face of Hogwarts' surly Potions professor.

 

SSLE

 

Once the tale had finally been told in its entirety to Minerva and Dumbledore, the Headmaster steepled his fingers, turning sad blue eyes on Severus. “I am sorry to have hurt you, Severus. I did not realize Lily had no way of knowing what was happening here. When she didn't contact you after your trial, I thought it best to say nothing.”

“Apology accepted, Headmaster. What matters now, is that she is back, that both of them are back.”

“I am delighted to hear you say that, Severus.”

Something about the Headmaster's tone had Severus tensing. “What are you implying?”

“What Albus won't say, but I will, is that you, Severus, have not been the nicest person to be around since you took the Potions professorship. You had no cares for anyone. To be honest, if it weren't for your potion skills and the spying you did for Albus, I would have wondered why he hired you at all.”

Temper getting the better of him, Severus leaned forward to look the older woman in her eyes, his voice low and tight. “Enlighten me, Minerva. For what, precisely, was I supposed to be … happy?” The caress on his forearm and the light squeeze of his hand, helped him reign in his emotions. “What I desired, I believed to be lost. I could see no reason for happiness. Regardless, that is the past. It is done.”

“And now, on to the present.” The Headmaster's blue eyes continued to be disconcertingly solemn as he gazed at Severus. “You do realize the fury, literally and figuratively, Harry's true identity will cause, do you not, Severus? Your life will be picked apart once more, replayed in the Prophet. The press will likely follow you everywhere. Are you ready for that?”

Severus' lip curled into his trademark sneer, though resolution burned in his gaze. “I will not hide like some sniveling coward to save myself any difficulty. I am Harry's father, and I will gladly do what I must to protect him. If that entails facing the vulturous feeding frenzy to give them their story, then so be it. I have endured it once; I will do so again.”

A light tugging on his elbow caught Severus' attention, and he turned his dark eyes to Lily, whose determination glinted in her bright green ones. " _We_ will protect him, Sev. _We_ will face them together. You're not alone anymore. They can say what they want about me, I'm sure they will, but they had better not come after you or Harry. They'll regret it if they do.”

Lily's support both comforted and relieved him. Whatever came, they would face it together. At that moment, Severus wished he could show her exactly how much he loved having her at his side. Pulling his gaze from her, he found Harry, petting and talking with Fawkes, but unless Severus missed his guess, and he usually did not, the boy had been listening. Thinking Harry should have some input since he was involved, Severus called his son to them.

“I know you are aware of what we have been discussing. Do you have any suggestions?” Harry's guilty expression confirmed Severus' suspicions. “You are not in trouble for listening. You should have been included from the beginning.”

“Well, maybe we should give the press the story they want. That way, we control what is said. We could set up an interview with a trusted or honest reporter. Then, refuse to answer any questions after that. They'd eventually get tired, wouldn't they?”

Albus let out a slight chuckle. “Spoken like a Slytherin, if I do say so myself.”

Pride had Severus letting out a laugh – something the elder staff members marveled over, having not heard the sound in more than a decade – and Summoned the chair Harry was using while talking with Fawkes. "Sit down, Harry. We may be in need of more of your insights."

“You _have_ to teach me how to do that."

Severus grinned at his son's awe. He had not done it to impress; it had been a force of habit. "In due time."

Lily, grinning, asked, “So, who do we trust?”

 

SSLE

 

The trip to Diagon Alley was delayed until the interview could be made the same day, which would be two days' hence. They toured the grounds, both Severus and Lily warning Harry away from the Forbidden Forest. Harry was, not surprisingly, awed at the Quidditch pitch, much to Severus' resignation. It was not that he had anything against Quidditch; he did not mind a calm, friendly game. He merely did not understand the obsession many witches and wizards, and apparently, his own son seemed to have for the sport. Severus was convinced Harry's interest in the game stemmed from James Potter. Lily had not said, but Severus would not be surprised if Harry's nursery theme had been nothing but Quidditch, indoctrinating his impressionable one-year-old son. Despite that, Severus no longer held any animosity towards the man. How could he when James had paid for protecting Harry with his life?

Back in his quarters after dinner, it startled Severus to find another bedroom had been added just down the short corridor from his own. When he thought on it, he realized he should not have been taken off guard. It made sense Hogwarts would add a bedroom for Harry. The addition left Lily as the only one needing somewhere to sleep. Severus knew precisely where he wished that to be but did not allow himself to dwell on the thought. Calling Harry to the room, he motioned for the boy to precede him. The room was comfortably-sized with a four-poster bed, side table, desk and chair, bookshelf, and a wardrobe. Nothing decorated the room. Even the bed was void of linens and duvet.

“This is to be your room, Harry.”

“What? _My_ room?”

“You are in need of a room, are you not?”

“Well, yes, but I didn't think it would be …”

Severus' arms crossed over his chest out of self-defense, rather than anger. Traversing this new territory nearly had him in a cold sweat, so to compensate, his voice roughened. “What did you not think it would be? Did you not expect it to be here in my quarters?”

Harry hid his face behind his hair, an action Severus was quite familiar with. “I don't know. I guess, it all seems so sudden, so I just thought Mum and I would be staying somewhere in the castle.”

The presence of Lily's hand at his back calmed Severus enough to allow his sense of humor to come into play. “And so you will be. I do believe my quarters _are_ in the castle. If not, I have been deceived for nine years.” As Severus had hoped, his dry attempt at humor garnered a chuckle from his son, as well as from Lily. “You may decorate your room however you wish. Simply ask the castle and it will be provided for you, likely from the house-elves.”

The boy's eyes widened. “I don't even know where to start!”

“Why don't you start with your bed, sweetheart, seeing as it's getting close to bedtime.”

“Already? Can't I stay up a little while longer?”

“I didn't say it was, just that it was getting close. It's been a long day.”

Apparently, Harry knew better than to protest further, which Severus was grateful to see. One thing he could not tolerate was whinging. “Yes, Mum.”

“We'll leave you be for now.”

Severus allowed himself to be led to the sofa in his sitting room. Sitting there with one ankle on the opposite knee, Lily leaning against his chest, and his hand idly playing in her hair, Severus could not remember the last time he felt this content. Inhaling deeply, the familiar scent of raspberries washed over him, filling his head with every good memory of her that he possessed.

“One day's reprieve before the whole world knows the truth. Are you sure you're ready for that, Sev?”

“I am. Lily, how did Minerva see Harry's scar? I understood that only the three of us could see it.”

“Oh, yeah. That. It's a timed charm, similar to Polyjuice. I guess I lost track of time and, once it wore off, neither of us noticed since both of us could see the scar to begin with."

“A charm version of Polyjuice? That is … impressive, Lils.”

“Well, I don't know that it's exactly like Polyjuice. I haven't actually tried to conceal more than Harry's scar.”

“You are highly skilled at Charms, Lily. I have no doubt it would be capable of changing one's entire physical appearance."

Lily gazed up at him, sincerity shining in her bright green eyes. “You always did have so much faith in me.”

Severus leaned away just enough to look her in the eye. “How could I not when you displayed your excellence at the subject time and again? You should be credited with the spell's creation.”

“I don't know. I mean, wouldn't it be unwise for the general population to know there's a spell that can change your physical attributes beyond a simple glamour? Not enhance them, but actually change them? Do you realize what people could do with such a spell?”

A sarcastic chuckle escaped Severus. “It cannot be more unwise than teaching schoolchildren a potion that can change them into someone else. Nor teaching the same children a potion that causes infatuation.”

“True, but with Polyjuice, you actually have to have a bit of the person you want to change into. If that's not a deterrent, then the muddy sludge that the potion resembles would be.” Lily shuddered. “I can't imagine anyone wanting to drink that.”

Genuine laughter bubbled up from Severus' chest. "Lils, you are well aware of the less conventional ingredients in a lot of our potions, and you drink those."

“Only when I have to. There are just some potions we have that are better than Muggle medicines.” Severus' continued chuckles earned him a sharp elbow to his ribs. “Hush, you. You grew up with these things; I didn't.” Realizing what she'd mentioned, Lily rushed to apologize. “I'm sorry, Sev. I didn't mean to bring that up.”

“Lily, hush. No, it was not a pleasant time, but you are correct. I did have potions rather than Muggle medicines during my childhood.”

The appearance of a yawning Harry sprang Lily into action. “Okay, time for bed. Let's see what you did with your room.”

Severus, not wanting to intrude on what was likely a well-established bedtime ritual, remained on the sofa, despite being curious as to how his son decorated his room. Would it be in Gryffindor colors for his mum? Slytherin colors? No colors? Perhaps he could peek in tomorrow and see it.

“Sev?”

“Yes?” Seeing Lily's expectant look, Severus realized he was supposed to follow, and once again, felt as if he was floundering. “Oh. You … You want me to … I did not wish to …” Frustrated at his lack of eloquence, he sighed.

Lily took pity on him and reached for his hand. “Yes. You wouldn't be intruding. You're a part of this, now.”

Tugging on his hand, Lily pulled him down the short corridor to Harry's room, Harry already inside. At the doorway, Severus could only stare in amazement. The bed was dressed with a scarlet duvet that had a moderately-wide, offsetting, vertical emerald green stripe with scarlet serpentine stitching inside. The bed curtains were exact opposite with circles of green stitching denoting paw prints inside the scarlet stripe. The other Hogwarts colors made appearances in framed artwork on the walls. The bookshelf had already been loaded with books, making Severus wonder if he had been carrying them around in his pocket the entire day. On the desktop lay some parchment, a pair of quills, and one bottle of ink for each of the school colors. He did not bother checking the wardrobe.

“How …?”

“Mum shrank everything for me so I could carry it all. All I had to do was tap them with my finger to get them to enlarge again.”

Severus arched a brow in Lily's direction. “And you are amazed when I profess faith in your Charms work?”

“Yes, well, it was simple enough, really. Harry, hop into bed.”

Once covered, Severus observed while Lily sat on the bed and ran her hand through Harry's hair. His own mother had done nothing of the sort with him, so he watched avidly as Lily tended to their son in the manner every mother should. Feeling like a voyeur, he eased from the room and returned to the sofa, heart heavy with everything he had missed – in childhood and with Harry. With the cover of darkness came the negative thoughts. He could not be a parent. He did not know the first thing of what was required. He would not have thought to sit on the bed and tuck in his son. He had not even thought to have another bedroom added to his rooms! That, alone, should be ample evidence he was not cut out for the role. It just was not in his genetic make-up.

“I'd offer a Knut for your thoughts, but judging by your expression, I'd be overpaying. What's wrong, Sev?"

Severus shrugged. How could he explain his feelings of inadequacy without actually admitting to having them? He pasted a small smile on his face as he turned to the woman now sitting beside him, worriedly watching him. “Nothing to concern yourself over.”

“Uh-uh. That isn't going to work with me, Sev. You know that. There's obviously something bothering you. Talk to me. I want to help.”

Severus inhaled deeply and let it out slowly, hoping to gain some mastery over himself. “You are very good with him, with Harry. I would never have thought to sit with him. It did not even occur to me to have an extra room added.” He laughed derisively. “How could I possibly be the father he needs if the basics do not come to mind?”

“Okay, let's address your first comment. I'm good with Harry because I've had him for nearly eleven years. It was a huge learning curve, I promise. I had to work hard at learning to be a mum. You don't think you'd have sat with him? Maybe, maybe not. You didn't think to request a room for him? You just haven't had the time that I have had. Give yourself a break, Sev. You've only known you're a father for a few hours." Lily slid her hand into the hair at his temple, thumb caressing along his cheekbone. "And I know you'll be a great father because you asked that last question."

His brows dipped as he mildly glared down at her. “That makes no sense.”

“Of course it does. It means you care. Someone who doesn't care isn't going to worry about whether they will be a good parent.”

Severus tried to hold her gaze but found he couldn't, his anxiety breaking through the wall he had attempted to hide his negativity behind. "How can you be so certain?"

“Because I know you, Sev. Trust me.” Leaning in, Lily brushed a kiss on his forehead before resting her own against his, her long hair creating a curtain, lending the moment quite a bit of intimacy.

Severus swallowed heavily before he could speak. “I do … trust you.”

Feeling Lily's light breaths feather across his cheek, he closed his eyes. The need to kiss her and so much more rose inside like a spark igniting into flame, sending his heartbeat into overdrive. All he had to do was tilt his chin just the slightest bit upward. He nearly groaned when Lily shifted a fraction of an inch closer. The mantra of _Not now!_ played in his head, but another voice asking _Why not now_ nearly drowned out the warning.

Though he did not move, Severus attempted to erect a barrier between them. “You should go to bed, Lils. As you told Harry, it has been a long, eventful day. Take my room.”

“I'm not kicking you out of your own room, Severus. I can sleep just fine here on the sofa.”

“As can I. Take my room. You will be closer to Harry in case you are needed.”

“I think I already am.”

Severus did groan then. “Please, Lils. Take my room.”

Sighing, Lily leaned back enough to meet his eyes. “Fine. Come with me, Sev. I want to sleep beside you again.”

The longing in Lily's voice nearly had Severus giving in. “Lily, if I were to do so, sleeping would be the last thing we did.”

“And that's a problem, why?”

Severus hated to admit it, but he had to make Lily understand. “It is a problem because I would not have enough self-control to stop. I would not be capable of sharing you with anyone, even if that person was Harry. Not … after so long.”

“I feel the same way.” Severus felt her lips brush the bridge of his nose, then move up to his forehead. “My Slytherin is turning Gryffindor, being all noble.”

Severus let out a shaky laugh. “Mind your tongue. You know that is an insult to us Slytherins.”

“Yeah.” Lily pressed her lips against his forehead a final time before pulling away. “Good night, Sev.”

“Good night, Lils.”

Once he heard his bedroom door close, Severus heaved a sigh and ran shaking hands through his hair. It had been a close call tonight. Having Lily close but only holding her hand was going to be the harshest torture he had ever endured. Breathing deeply and evenly to calm himself, Severus wondered how he could maneuver things to get some time with Lily, just the two of them. He had suffered many Cruciatus Curses from the Dark Lord, himself, but this was a torture he could not endure for an extended period.

Retrieving a change of clothes he kept in his lab for when he spent many days inside brewing, Severus slipped them on, then went about making his sofa more comfortable. Midnight chimed before he fell into a restless sleep.

 

SSLE

 

A figure crept down the corridor on silent feet, shivering at each touch of the cold stone. By shielded wandlight, she crept to the kitchen to get a glass of water. The clock on the wall proclaimed it to be three o'clock; she'd only fallen asleep three and a half hours ago. Walking away from Severus earlier had been the hardest thing she'd had to do in a long while. As quietly as she could, Lily filled her glass and crept back into the sitting room. Needs she hadn't experienced in over a decade had reawakened the moment Severus had wrapped his arms around her in that bookstore. If they didn't get some time alone soon, she was afraid she'd say to hell with it and lock them in his bedroom until the both of them were exhausted from making up for lost time, regardless of whether Harry was nearby.

Lily dimmed the light and as she passed the sofa, chanced a look. Severus lay sleeping on his back, left arm thrown up over the sofa arm, right arm draped across his stomach. His face was turned away from her, his hair haphazardly draped along his cheek. She wondered about the clothes; he certainly hadn't retrieved another set from his room, and he hadn't merely Transfigured the ones he'd worn since those were stacked, neatly folded, on the floor. Even in the darkness, she could see something odd about the shirt he wore. It took a few moments of concentration before she realized what it was she had noticed. His right arm was bare, indicating a short sleeve, while his left arm had a long one. Instantly, Lily understood why. Though a bit of darker shadow peeked out from where the material had ridden up slightly, she really didn't have to see it to know Voldemort's brand hid under there.

_Oh, Sev. There's no peace for you, is there? Even to sleep you feel the need to cover it. I wish I could do something. I wonder if the charm I used on Harry's scar would work on the Mark?_ Severus shifted his position, rolling onto his side, muttering, and Lily backed away. _You may not want to hear it, but you're just as brave and noble as any Gryffindor. Sleep well, love._

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 


	2. Wait for It ...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> You know those extra tags I used for this story? Well, towards the end of this chapter ... *waggles eyebrows*

“ _ **Of all the hardships a person had to face, none was more punishing than the simple act of waiting.”**_ _ **  
**_ _ **―**_ _ **Khaled Hosseini,**_[ _ **A Thousand Splendid Suns**_](https://www.goodreads.com/work/quotes/3271379)

 

 

When Harry opened his eyes, his first thought was trying to figure out his location. This bed wasn't the one he'd slept in previously. As he squinted in the darkness, he remembered everything that had happened the day before. He and his mum had gone to Diagon Alley to get a few things, but his mum had found his dad. Harry grinned. His dad! It was weird to think those two words. For years, his dad had been some nebulous person existing out there in the world somewhere, but now, Harry had a flesh and blood person to attach to those two words. He'd seen photos, of course, so he knew what the man looked like – at least at a younger age – but seeing him in person just made him more real. He couldn't tell himself that the photos were merely edited pictures of himself, done to make him feel better. Not anymore. Harry could see the young face, _his_ face, in the older one. He wasn't sure what to make of his dad. At times, the man seemed very reserved and formal, but at other times, he'd smile or joke with Harry's mum, though Harry had a hard time distinguishing between a joke and not one.

 

Not hearing any noise coming from the rest of the rooms, Harry surmised it must still be early. He didn't think he could get back to sleep; he was always an early riser, much to his mum's dismay sometimes. Harry wondered if he could sneak out and get the book his dad let him read. Deciding to chance it, he tiptoed out of his room and down the corridor to the sitting room. The light tinkling of glass and the sound of a knife cutting through ingredients drew Harry's attention, so he crept to the open lab door to peek inside. He found his dad working. Today, the man looked different. He wasn't wearing the long, buttoned coat, but a simple long-sleeved, collared shirt with the sleeves rolled to the elbows. Or, one sleeve was rolled up. The other only halfway rolled. The sides of his hair had been tied back with an elastic hair tie. Probably to keep it out of his face.

 

Harry silently watched as his dad tended to several cauldrons at once, cutting various ingredients as he made his way down the line, checking the potions within. He reached up to a shelf over his head with his left hand, while stirring with his right, and the sleeve slipped further to reveal part of a faded but still visible tattoo on his inner forearm. Now, Harry knew from what his mum had told him that in choosing to follow Voldemort, his dad had been branded to signify his loyalty, but seeing it in person, even from across the room, made Harry shudder. The motion must have caught his dad's attention for his head whipped around, eyes surprised, before he turned away and yanked down the left sleeve, buttoning the cuff.

 

“You may enter.”

 

“Sorry to bother you. Are you working on that list of potions the matron needs?”

 

“You are not disturbing me. Yes, these are for Madam Pomfrey. Care to guess as to what it is I am brewing?”

 

Harry studied the ingredients still sitting out. Chile peppers. Echinacea flowers. Eucalyptus oil. Mandrake root and shavings of Bicorn horn. “Pepperup Potion?”

 

“Well done. Yes, that is precisely it. As it is used most often, Madam Pomfrey needs more of this potion than the others. It is good that I have sufficient amounts of the ingredients to brew the quantity of the potion she requires.”

 

Harry beamed at the praise. It made him feel really good inside. He doubted the man gave out approval unless it was honestly earned. He certainly didn't seem the type to praise everyone for everything. Harry imagined his dad took his potions work very seriously, whether it be personal work or teaching. He watched a few moments, biting his lip. There was so much he had wanted to say, and yet, at the moment, he couldn't think of a single thing.

 

“Is there anything I can do to help?”

 

Harry waited while his dad's gaze flew around the work area before returning to him. “How is your penmanship? The Pepperup bottles need labeling as these batches will be finished soon.”

 

“It's not bad. I've used a quill just as much as Muggle utensils.”

 

His dad retrieved a piece of parchment and quill and set them on the work table. “Let me see. Madam Pomfrey needs them to be legible.” Harry took the quill and began to write when his dad's gasp had him looking up. The man looked shocked. “You are left-handed?”

 

“Not really. I do most things with my right. I learned to write with my left so that I could do two things at once, like eat and take notes or write while brewing – when I start brewing. I can write with my right hand, too.”

 

“Intriguing. My mother was left-handed.”

 

“Really?”

 

“Yes.” Inspecting what Harry had written, he waved to the empty bottles. “You may begin. I do believe Madam Pomfrey has found herself a new bottle labeler. I have heard countless complaints regarding my messy scrawl.”

 

Snickering, Harry set to work on the labels, finishing just as his dad began removing the cauldrons from the flames. Though nothing was said about the labels, Harry assumed he'd done well when the man started affixing them to the bottles. Harry hoped he could continue helping; he was enjoying himself, and he had some questions he wanted to ask his dad.

 

“Boil-Cure Potion. What ingredients are needed?"

 

Harry thought furiously, not wanting to disappoint. “Er, six snake fangs, four horned slugs, and two porcupine quills.”

 

“And how are they prepared?”

 

“You have to crush the snake fangs into a fine powder to get four measures. The horned slugs and porcupine quills you add whole.”

 

“I am impressed. Would you like to prepare the snake fangs?”

 

He'd done it! He'd impressed his dad! Harry felt like jumping up and down in his excitement but rather thought the man he called _Dad_ would not appreciate such a display. “Can I?”

 

“I would not have asked otherwise.”

 

Harry walked with a slight bounce in his step to the storage cabinet where the ingredients were kept and counted out six snake fangs. Dropping them inside a clean mortar, he grabbed the accompanying pestle and took it over to the table. As he ground them, Harry gathered the courage to ask the questions he'd wanted to ask.

 

“Dad, can I ask you some questions?”

 

Harry noticed his dad pause briefly in cleaning the cauldrons after having bottled all the Pepperup Potion. “You may.”

 

“Mum told me you and she had been friends since before you went to Hogwarts. What I don't understand is why you pretended to stop being friends at the end of your fifth year. Mum wouldn't tell me.” Hearing his dad's heavy sigh, Harry glanced up from his task, worried he'd asked the wrong thing. “You don't have to tell me. I'm sorry I asked.”

 

“No. You need not apologize. Many bad things were beginning to occur. The Dark Lord – Voldemort – began recruiting at Hogwarts. Muggle-borns were targets of harsh cruelty and were dealt with twice as harshly if they dared to befriend someone of pure blood. No one in Slytherin admitted to being anything but pure-blood, so when the attacks began, your mother was considered a high-value target. I could not allow her to be hurt more than she already had been, so I devised the plan to have a very public argument. She did not agree at first, but I managed to change her mind. I despised calling her that word and loathed myself for uttering it.”

 

“But it worked?” Harry had all but forgotten to crush his fangs as he listened to the story.

 

After the cauldrons were cleaned, his dad began gathering ingredients for the potion following the Boil-Cure. "It did. The attacks on her stopped almost completely for the next school year. Our last year, there were near constant attacks on anyone who disagreed with the idea of purity in the Wizarding world. I did my best to protect her, but I was discovered. I paid dearly for my efforts, but I did not regret it."

 

“And after school?”

 

“After we left Hogwarts, we gave up the pretense. We grew close during the next two years. Now, that I think about that time, I am certain I loved her before we left school. We began … dating … when we were nineteen. As the war raged, I had the idea that to fight the Dark Arts, you had to be familiar with and be willing to _use_ the Dark Arts.”

 

Harry didn't know what to say. His dad didn't need to elaborate. He had delved too deeply into the Dark Arts and turned away from his mum. “You got too involved, didn't you?”

 

“I did. The supposed estrangement from your mother during our Hogwarts years allowed a certain amount of fascination and respect for the darker side of magic to take hold, having been subjected to it constantly the last two years of our schooling. I regret that hold did not fade once your mother and I reunited. The last time I saw her was in October 1979. My love for her never wavered; I was too deep to get out until …”

 

Harry jumped when his dad's dark gaze landed on him suddenly and felt the man was judging him, maybe gauging how much to say. "Until when? Wait. You turned spy. You must have seen or heard something to pull you out of it." Harry took a few moments to think, wondering if his dad would volunteer the information. When silence reigned for a full minute, an idea popped into Harry's head.

 

“Mum and James were betrayed, and Voldemort came after us."

 

“Yes and no. I prefer not to say much as I do not know if your mother wants you to know just yet. I discovered the Dark Lord wanted to destroy you, your mum and James. That is when I turned spy. I had lost her, but I did not want harm to come to any of you. I thought you to be safe, and you were – for a time. But then, one of James' friends betrayed you, and the Dark Lord learned of your location. I believe you are aware of what happened next."

 

“Yeah,” Harry murmured, finishing off his snake fangs. “It's not fair. Everything you and mum went through isn't fair.”

 

“No, but seldom is life ever fair. That, unfortunately, is a lesson you must learn sooner rather than later. Regardless, none of the past matters now. I see you have finished. Your next step is to add the four measures to the cauldrons I have prepared. Then, you will … ”

 

Harry meticulously followed each of his father's instructions. Once the potions were set to brew, Harry helped prepare the labels, then slice, dice, and chop the next ingredients for a burn salve. Then, it was time to return to the Boil-Cure, Harry once more following every instruction given, and receiving praise with each accomplished step.

 

Neither realized they were observed by a smiling, red-haired woman, watching the father patiently explain to his son brewing steps, how to properly prepare ingredients, or why to stir a certain way. She backed silently out of the doorway, obviously pleased with the tableau of father and son bonding over potion-making.

 

SSLE

 

At breakfast, Harry met an extremely short, squeaky-voiced professor, who taught Charms. Harry sat between the tiny professor and his mum, with his dad on his mum's other side. On the diminutive professor's other side was Professor McGonagall, Madam Pomfrey, then, the Headmaster. The round table made it easy to talk to anyone he chose, and he did speak to each of them. He couldn't help noticing the odd grins shared between Madam Pomfrey, Professors Flitwick and McGonagall after glancing in his parents' direction. Wondering what was so amusing, he looked over at his mum and dad but didn't see anything unusual. They were merely eating. The professors continued to hide their grins, so Harry kept watching – and caught a look passing between his parents he couldn't understand.

 

“So, Lily, what do you think you'll do now that you're back?”

 

As Harry watched, his mum pulled her gaze away from his dad to face the matron. Harry missed what she said as he tried to interpret the expression on his dad's face as he watched his mum until it disappeared when the Headmaster questioned him. Harry returned his attention to his breakfast, a little confused. What did the looks mean? Harry decided to forget about it and just enjoy being at Hogwarts and with his parents.

 

After breakfast, Harry decided to continue helping his dad in the lab with whatever he was allowed to do. In fact, his mum joined in, and it turned into a family brewing session. Harry knew most kids would not think of spending time with their parents as fun, but Harry truly enjoyed it. Watching the two, he discovered they had their own methods of doing things. His dad preferred to have each ingredient prepared and lined up, ready to be used. His mum seemed to prefer to prepare things as she went. Between the two of them, and what little Harry was allowed to do, they finished half of Madam Pomfrey's list of needed potions by lunchtime.

 

The afternoon was spent the same as the morning. By dinnertime, only a quarter of the list remained, and those were the potions that required ingredients in larger quantities than they had on hand. The evening passed with the three of them relaxing in the sitting room. Occasionally, Harry caught his parents sharing the same look that had passed between them at breakfast, and he still had no clue as to what it meant. He didn't have time to dwell too much on the mystery because his mum shooed him off to bed, claiming he needed his rest for the trip to Diagon Alley and the interview in the morning.

 

SSLE

 

After another restless night on the sofa, Severus' fuse was rather short. He began to have doubts that the interview was a wise decision – or rather his attendance was what he doubted was wise. Opening up to a stranger went against his very nature, but he knew he, Lily, and Harry would be harassed if they did not do something. Of course, that was not the entire reason for his ill-temper. His self-imposed torture bore the bulk of the responsibility for it. He craved some time alone with Lily, yet guilt threatened to choke him every time he had the thought because, for that to happen, Harry would need to be elsewhere – and Severus knew an hour or two would not be long enough. What kind of father wished his child away? Especially after just discovering said child's paternity? Today would be an Occlumency-reliant day, that was certain.

 

As it turned out, the interview did not make Severus cringe as much as he had expected. The young female reporter asked some insightful questions, coming across as genuinely sincere. She had even addressed Harry, asking him questions, treating him as if his thoughts and opinions mattered. Within an hour, she declared she had nothing further, then bid them good-bye.

 

Now, it was time to get Harry's school necessities. Severus, dressed in what he usually wore for teaching, pulled the letter from the inside pocket of the jacket. When Minerva had given it to him that morning, he had promptly slipped it into his coat with a nod of thanks. Seeing the address on the envelope made him grin, amazed even now that he could do so and have it be sincere.

 

“According to the address, there is an eleven-year-old boy named Harry residing in the second bedroom of my quarters at Hogwarts. Lils, do we know of such a boy?”

 

“Dad, come on!” Still toying with his son, Severus arched a brow before handing over the letter.

 

Lily chuckled. “You're terrible, Sev, teasing him that way. You know he's been wanting that letter.”

 

While Harry read over the letter, Severus leaned close to Lily's ear. “It did not give a surname for Harry, despite it officially being Potter.”

 

Lily looked up at him, surprise widening her eyes. “It didn't?” She glanced around as if to see whether they were being watched. Severus noticed one or two people staring at them, but a scowl from him had them averting their eyes. Meeting his gaze again, she said, “I guess that's something we should address, isn't it?”

 

“Indeed. It depends on Harry's thoughts, however. I will not make the change if he does not desire it.”

 

“Of course he does, Sev, but you're right. He should be the one to decide.”

 

“Can we go by the bookshop first?” Harry, having finished reading through the letter, and subsequently perusing his list, stared up at them pleadingly.

 

Lily smiled down at Harry. “Of course, sweetheart.”

 

The gawking, finger-pointing, and whispers that followed the three of them as they made their way to Flourish and Blotts rankled Severus to the point of practically growling, biting insults on the tip of his tongue. A feminine hand gently uncurled his left fist and clasped the hand, her free hand resting at his elbow.

 

“Try to ignore them, Sev. We knew it could be like this. People were bound to notice. Besides, if you hadn't nurtured the reputation of being callous and cold, they wouldn't stare quite so much at the sight of you being with me.”

 

Severus' angry dark gaze met her amused green one and he sneered, or he tried to. His temper had begun to fade the instant Lily had taken his hand. His sneer wobbled into a grimace, then, he sighed heavily. She was right; of course, she was. Today was for Harry. Severus needed to remember his first trip to Diagon Alley for his school supplies and attempt to make this trip a treasured memory for his son.

 

He and Lily weren't the only ones visiting Diagon Alley for school. While not packed, many of the shops were fuller than on a regular day. One hand on Harry's shoulder and his other clutching Lily's, Severus steered them to a relatively clear spot in the shop, letting Harry loose among the shelves to find his own books. That was something Severus had enjoyed when young, and he suspected Harry would, as well. It was not as if Harry was unfamiliar with the place. Severus' eyes searched for and found the spot in which he had been standing when Lily had walked back into his life, bringing with her a second revelation. Gazing down at the woman at his side, he could see her thoughts had mirrored his. Squeezing her hand gained her attention.

 

He had to lean close to her ear to be heard above the crowd. “My life changed for the better two days ago.” Severus' mood evaporated instantly when a smarmy voice came from behind him. “Damn.” Tense, Severus faced one of his former associates. “Lucius.”

 

“I thought it was you I saw over here, but seeing as you're with a woman, I had to be sure. Then, I realized who it was I was seeing. I heard she was miraculously back from the dead.” The man's sneer could have rivaled one of Severus'. “I should have known the instant the … _she_ … returned you'd latch onto her just as you did all those years ago. If memory serves, she chose another, did she not? I suppose it's a good thing he's out of the way, isn't it?”

 

Inside, Severus seethed at the other man's audacity to speak of Lily in such a derogatory way. His outward expression gave the appearance of being bored. “What is it that you want, Lucius?”

 

“Want? Certainly, nothing from a traitor, I can assure you. I merely wanted to see if the rumor that Lily Potter was back was true.” The senior Malfoy faked a gasp. “And since Lily Potter is here, that must mean young Harry is here, as well. Where is the lad?”

 

Severus took a half-step forward and all but growled, “Do not ever go near Harry.”

 

“My, Severus. A little possessive. Do you think you'll step in and be the Daddy young Harry never had? You do realize, don't you, Severus, that you'll always be second best to Potter?”

 

Muscle working in his jaw, Severus had actually grabbed the handle of his wand when his son's voice stopped him.

 

“Dad?”

 

Unfortunately, the question drew Lucius' attention, too. “Well, well, well. Severus! I had no idea. I suppose my Daddy comment was closer to the truth than I realized. Who would have thought _you_ would be the father of the Boy Who Lived?”

 

Lucius Malfoy reached out to touch Harry, but Severus had had enough. Clamping his left hand around Lucius' arm and shoving Harry behind him with his right, Severus stood between the oily snake and his son, every muscle tensed and ready for action, his voice low and threatening. “Never touch my son.”

 

Lucius' smarmy act vanished, and his cold gray eyes stared back. "Watch yourself, Severus. You forget who it is you're talking to."

 

“And you forget precisely what it was I did for the Dark Lord, how … undetectable … they could be.”

 

After a moment, the smug expression returned. “Tell me, Severus.” Lucius tapped the inside of Severus' forearm with his snake-headed cane where the both of them knew the Dark Mark to be. “Does your precious son know of the vile things his Daddy did years ago?”

 

Terror, shock, and pride warred for supremacy inside Severus when Harry stepped between them, confronting the blond wizard. “Yes, I do, and I don't care. Dad made mistakes. Everyone does. But you know what? You've just made a huge one. I'll let you try to figure out what it is.”

 

“Lily.” Though only one word, Severus' meaning was understood; Harry was suddenly pulled backward.

 

The elder Malfoy continued his goading. “You do know what's in store for him, don't you, Severus? I wonder how long it'll take before he's following in his _Daddy's_ footsteps?”

 

“If my son comes to any harm, Lucius, you will reap double what was sown. Heed my warning. This is the only one you shall receive.”

 

In response, Lucius Malfoy yanked his arm from Severus' grasp and stalked away. Severus watched until his enemy had left his sight. Facing Lily and his son, he folded his arms over his chest and stared down at Harry.

 

“That was the most imbecilic, reckless thing you could have ever done! Lucius Malfoy is not a man with whom to trifle.” Heaving a sigh, Severus relaxed his stance and eased Harry's chin up – which had dropped – to meet his gaze and offered his son a smile. “That having been said, you have made me proud for standing up to him … and for coming to my defense. To what were you referring as Malfoy senior's big mistake?”

 

“Oh, er, well, Mum had her wand out.” Harry shrugged, grinning. “I assume she did something.”

 

Severus turned an arched brow to Lily. “I had thought you were too quiet to simply be observing. What is it that you did?”

 

“Oh, nothing." Lily rolled her wand between her fingers, grinning. "I just made him think his hair had suddenly turned a lovely fuchsia. He doesn't seem to have changed much, and I remember him being quite fascinated with his appearance."

 

Severus dropped his head into his hand, hair curtaining his face, shoulders shaking with his silent laughter. Once he could breathe again, he shook his head. “He is still as vain as he once was. Lucius will recognize your spellwork.” At Harry's puzzled expression, Severus elaborated. “Your mother changed his hair multiple times throughout our Hogwarts days.”

 

Harry snorted. Lily responded to Severus' comment. “I hope he does recognize my work. It would serve him right. You didn't think I was going to sit back and just let him insult the two of you, did you?”

 

“And you. He can insult me all he desires; his pathetic taunts do not affect me.”

 

This time, Lily snorted. “Oh, yes, that's why you were going for your wand, because you weren't bothered by what he said.”

 

Heat suffused Severus' cheeks, and he cleared his throat. “A momentary lapse.” Determined to change the subject, Severus turned back to Harry. “Did you find all of your texts?”

 

“Not yet. I have a few left to get.”

 

“Then, finish. We have much to do yet today.”

 

Harry headed back amongst the shelves. Lily chuckled. “Nice deflection, Sev.”

 

Severus raised a brow, but a smile ruined the effect. “I have no clue as to what you mean.”

 

Dark eyes scanning the crowd for other unpleasant surprises, he noticed a lot of heads suddenly turn away, and sighed. He should have known his confrontation with Malfoy would garner attention. There was nothing for it. He would not deprive Harry of the enjoyment of buying his school supplies for the first time. A light touch at the small of his back brought his attention back to Lily. She seemed to be watching him closely.

 

“Do you think it'll be bad once the article is published?”

 

Severus nodded. “To expect otherwise would be foolish. The gossipmongers need no provocation to prattle about things that do not concern them.”

Lily sighed. “Yeah, I suppose you're right.”

 

“Naturally.”

 

“Oh, stop with the smirking.” Standing on tiptoe, she whispered, “I can think of something better you can do with that mouth.”

 

The combination of suggestive words and her warm breath against his ear had gooseflesh popping up along his arms, causing Severus's eyes to drift shut and for him to inhale deeply. “Lily.” It came out more of a plea “Please.”

 

“I know. I'm sorry.”

 

“Okay, I've got them all.”

 

Severus retreated two full steps before turning to Harry. “Very well. Up to the front, then.”

 

After purchasing the books, the little family stopped at Gladrags to get Harry's robes, went to the apothecary, the cauldron shop, and a few others to round out Harry's list. As a reward for his patience, the three took a detour to Quality Quidditch Supplies, where Harry gawked at the newest broom, the Nimbus Two-Thousand. Their last stop was to get Harry's wand.

 

Severus found Ollivander just as eerie now as he did when he had first come, the man's silvery eyes like lanterns in the dim shop. The old wandmaker went through his speech of remembering every wand he made, the same speech Severus had heard all those years ago. Wishing the wandmaker would just get to it, Severus folded his arms over his chest and put on a fierce scowl. Box after box of wands deposited on the counter, Harry began making his way through them.

 

“Are you angry with me, Sev?”

 

“No, Lils, of course, I am not. It is becoming more … difficult … to refrain from doing something I should not.”

 

Lily remained silent for a time. “I know that's how you feel but would it really be so bad to share just one – ”

 

“My wand is a brother to that one?”

 

Harry's horrified question had Severus' gaze flying to the wand in question. He had missed seeing a wand choose his son. While he had not been giving the proceedings much attention, Lily certainly had been.

 

“Are you certain, Ollivander? The same phoenix?”

 

“I don't use phoenix feathers often so when I do, I tend to remember them. That Harry is chosen by this wand means he is destined for great things."

 

Severus exchanged a quick glance with Lily before paying for Harry's wand and ushering the other two out the door. Finished with their errands, they returned to the castle in time for Harry to put his supplies in his room before lunch. Again, they sat at a round table in the Great Hall, in the same configuration as before. Though he ate, Severus tasted none of it, too aware of Lily's hand at his knee. A part of him wished she would move it, his hold on his willpower tenuous at best. Her hand slowly inched upward, and Severus mentally cursed himself for even having that thought, while simultaneously reveling in the heat that trailed in its wake the closer it drew to …

 

_Danger! Danger, Will Robinson!_ The warning from the old television show he had watched at Lily's house when they were young blared in his head like an angry klaxon. The instant his hand contacted with hers, halting its upward motion, Lily shot him a sheepishly apologetic look before pulling her hand from underneath his. Feeling like a hormonal teenager, Severus returned to his meal, brows like angry slashes over his dark eyes, the muscle in his jaw visibly twitching.

 

SSLE

 

Lily felt miserable. She wasn't intentionally teasing Severus; at lunch, she hadn't even realized her hand had moved until his had stopped hers. She had begged off helping finish the matron's list of needed potions, claiming to want to see the Muggle Studies classroom in which she'd be teaching. Harry had accompanied him, for which Lily was grateful. She needed some time to think, to try to get herself under some semblance of control, chastising herself for acting like a randy teen. She was an adult and needed to act like one. What she didn't understand was why those feelings were so intense. At nineteen, she had these desires, certainly, and when she and Sev had finally acted on them, they had been strong, but not like this, not this all-consuming need.

 

Tears filled her eyes as she thought about the state of things. Severus' patience with her was wearing thin; she knew that. The last thing she wanted was for him to be angry with her, but that seemed to be exactly where they were heading. How much longer before he loosed what she knew could be a spiteful temper on her or Harry? On her, she didn't care so much. She had plenty of experience dealing with it, but Harry was another matter. He wouldn't understand the cause of his father's anger. It could irreparably harm their relationship.

 

“Lily? Child, what's wrong?”

 

Lily raised a tearful gaze to the voice and found herself staring at Madam Pomfrey. Her wanderings had taken her to the corridor housing the hospital wing. At the sight of the kindly, though sometimes strict, matron, a stream of tears flooded Lily's cheeks. “I don't know, Madam Pomfrey, but I think something is.”

 

The matron gently took Lily's upper arm and steered her through the hospital wing and into her office, closing the door behind them. Gently pushing Lily into a seat, Madam Pomfrey sat across from her. “Why do you think something is wrong?”

 

“Because I keep messing up and it's making Sev angry.”

 

“What do you mean 'messing up'?”

 

Swiping at her tears, Lily debated on what she should say. Madam Pomfrey and Severus were colleagues. He'd find it discomfiting to know the woman had knowledge of this part of his private life, but who else could Lily talk to? There wasn't anyone she trusted other than Professor McGonagall. At least Madam Pomfrey knew how to keep things professional when it came to her patients. She had never let on that she knew of Severus' horrible upbringing until she knew that Lily had known. Many times, Lily had sought out the woman's advice on what to do for him.

 

“It seems I keep … teasing … him. Unintentionally. I often don't realize I'm doing it.”

 

“Teasing? I know Severus can be rather stern, but I know I have seen him smile more since you came here than I have in the last nine years. I think your teasing is doing him some good.”

 

Lily shook her head, not really wanting to have to spell it out. “Not that kind of teasing.” To further her point, she gave the matron a significant look, her cheeks burning. She hoped the other woman picked up on her meaning because she really didn't want to be more specific.

 

“Oh. Oh!”

 

“Exactly. I can't seem to help myself. I've gone eleven years without feeling this way, and now it's all I can think about. I feel like a ruddy teen!"

 

“So, just to be clear, you and Severus _haven't_ since you returned? To be honest, I'm surprised you've lasted this long.”

 

“No, we haven't." Lily sniffled and wiped angrily at a tear on her cheek. "The bloody noble git told me to take his room so I could be close to Harry in case Harry needed me, new place and all that, and he's been sleeping on his sofa. He won't even kiss me because he knows it would lead to other things! He wants to as much as I do, I know that. I've seen it in his eyes, heard it in his voice, felt it in his touches, and if Harry weren't with us, we would have already. Many times over. Now, I can't help thinking of ways to get Harry out for a while, and I feel so awful for it. I'm his mother. I shouldn't want him gone just so that I can … relieve a little tension."

 

“You're young and healthy. Even mothers have itches that need scratching." Lily goggled up at the matron, never having thought she'd hear those words from the woman, which made the matron chuckle. "I do pay attention to my charges, Lily. I've heard enough of the lingo teens use to be able to use it myself. However, what you're feeling isn't just an itch. You've found your way back to the person you love. It's your heart's way of expressing its desire to reconnect with him fully."

 

“It won't happen any time soon. Like I said, with Harry around, Sev won't do a thing." Lily growled in frustration. "That man's restraint is irritatingly amazing. I, on the other hand, seem to have none, and that takes us back to my first statement. I know I'm making him angry, but more often than not, I don't realize I've done anything until after the fact."

 

“What you and Severus need is some time alone, to learn to be a couple again. You're already learning to be a family, and that's great, but there's more to you than motherhood, just like there's more to him than fatherhood or Potions Master. That's my official prescription. Now, to achieve that, I will set something up for tomorrow. You'll have the entire day between breakfast and dinner. That will be a start. I think, once a week until the start of the term will help get the two of you back on track."

 

Lily couldn't believe her ears. “Really? You'd do something like that?”

 

“Yes, really. The two of you deserve every bit of happiness you can get. Severus is already changing from the person he's been for the last near-decade. Love is a wonderful thing. Now, do you need a certain potion? Not that I think Severus would mind, but I think that would be more complication than you really need right now.”

 

Lily's already red cheeks darkened. “Er, no. I don't need the potion. I, er, took this month's dose that first day.”

 

“Come to see me next month, then. That's a potion I have plenty of – and not one I'll ask Severus to brew."

 

Lily laughed, wiping away the remaining wetness from her eyes. “It would be funny to see his expression, though. He's already meticulous when it comes to his potions; I could see him being really paranoid in his attempt to get that one right.”

 

Madam Pomfrey chuckled. “Triple-checking every step before he did it.”

 

Lily giggled. “Right? Thanks, Madam Pomfrey. You always know how to make me feel better.”

 

“Now that we're colleagues, you call me Poppy. As for making you feel better, this situation is easier to solve than some of the other ones you've come to see me over. I'm just glad I could help. If I don't see you before, then, I'll see you at breakfast.”

 

Nodding, Lily hugged the older witch, glad she'd confided in her. Once she left the hospital wing, she did head to her classroom to see what was there and if she could use it in her lectures.

 

SSLE

 

At dinner, a flurry of owls hurtled through one of the Great Hall windows and crowded around Harry, Lily, and Severus. Staring in awe at all the letters, Harry picked up one of the envelopes, having seen his name. Some of the envelopes in front of his mum and dad were red, twitched, and smoked. Momentarily forgetting the letter he held, Harry watched both his parents spring into action, brandishing their wands at the quivering letters in time to contain the explosions when the letters burst. Echoing voices yelling over themselves made it difficult for Harry to comprehend all of the words adequately, but he did catch a few, none of them very nice if his parents' expressions were anything to judge by. The other professors began collecting the mass of regular envelopes.

 

“How dare they spew their imbecilic, prejudicial drivel!”

 

Harry stared at his dad. He had never seen the man so angry, not even with that Mr. Malfoy. His dad's jaw was clenched so tightly Harry was sure he was going to break some teeth. His dad's chest heaved with every breath he took, and Harry thought the shreds from the red letters should combust again the way his dad stared so menacingly at them.

 

“It appears the interview has been printed.”

 

Harry watched, agape, as his dad turned to the Headmaster, a sneer in place. “Oh, wonderfully brilliant deduction, Albus. Truly. Any other gifted insights you care to impart to us?”

 

“Severus, please.”

 

Harry thought he heard his mum mention him, but she said it so quietly he couldn't be sure, even though he was right next to her. His dad's furious, dark gaze found him, and as Harry watched, the ferocity in those dark eyes lessened, his dad's entire stance softening. A light touch from his mum had him dropping into the chair he'd vacated and faced his mum.

 

“They have no right to say those things about you or Harry.”

 

“I know. I expected it, though. We'll hold our heads high regardless. The true story is out there, and nothing anyone says that is negative really matters.”

 

“Listen to Lily, Severus. You cannot let them goad you into responding. If they receive no reaction from any of you, they'll give up.”

 

“Perhaps. Sooner rather than later would be preferable.”

 

“While unable to print the exact interview, it will likely be alluded to in other publications. You must be prepared for speculation to be rampant, no matter that the real story has been told.”

 

“Be that as it may, why they feel they are entitled to share their atrocious opinions with anyone is beyond my comprehension.”

 

While the adults talked and sorted through the sizable pile of letters, Harry looked over the one he held in his hands. The writing seemed to be from a child so, surely, it couldn't be a mean one, could it? Taking a quick glance at the others, he saw they were still occupied. Breaking the plain wax seal, Harry pulled out a piece of parchment and began to read.

 

_Dear Harry,_

 

_You don't know me, but I've heard of you. There's not really anyone in our world who hasn't. Anyway, I wanted to introduce myself. My name is Ginny Weasley. I'm almost ten years old, so, I won't be going to Hogwarts this year but next. I can't wait until it's my turn. I've heard so much about Hogwarts from my older brothers. I have six of them, though only five have attended Hogwarts so far. My brother, Ron, will be starting this year too. My twin brothers, Fred and George, love pranks. Another brother is a Prefect for Gryffindor. My two oldest have graduated. One is a Curse Breaker for Gringotts and the other works on a dragon reserve in Romania._

 

_The reason I wanted to say hello is because I've read the interview you, your mum, and your dad gave. Unlike some people – my brother Ron, for instance – I think it's a great thing for you to have your mum AND your dad. I will admit, though, that it's weird to think of the grouchy professor (sorry, not my words) as a dad. Actually, irritable is the mildest I've heard. I don't say that to hurt you. You'll probably hear worse once everyone is there, so be ready. I'm sure you know how he really is._

 

_Anyway, I figure there will be some stupid people out there who'll judge you, make assumptions about you, maybe say some horrible things about your mum and dad. I just wanted to let you know that there are actually some people out here who don't think like that. If the kids there act like idiots and you feel like you want someone to talk to, you can write to me and rant about it all you want. I promise that I'll listen, maybe offer some unsolicited advice._

 

_Your (hopefully) friend,_

 

_Ginny_

 

“What's that, sweetheart?”

 

Harry's head whipped up to see both his parents looking in his direction. “Oh, er, it's a letter, a nice one, from someone. She said she read the interview and is glad that I have the both of you now. She told me a bit about herself, that she isn't coming to Hogwarts until next year.”

 

“She?” Harry's gaze flicked to his dad, blushing at his dad's smirk and raised brow. “Does this girl have a name?”

 

“Yeah, it's Ginny. She's the youngest of …” Harry rechecked the letter to make sure he had the details correct. “ … the youngest of seven. She has a brother coming to school this year. She has twin brothers who like pranks.” His dad suddenly groaned and dropped his head into his hand. “What?”

 

“Weasley is this girl's surname, is it not?”

 

“Yes, how did you know?” His dad groaned again, both elbows on the table and his head in his hands. “What's wrong, Dad?” Harry's confused gaze darted around the table at the chuckles from the others.

 

“That family has been the bane of my teaching career.”

 

“Oh, now, Severus, Mr. William Weasley and Mr. Charlie Weasley were good students. Even Mr. Percy Weasley isn't all that bad.”

 

“Very well, Minerva, I am willing to admit those particular Weasleys were and are adequate students. The twins, however, are a menace to the entire school.”

 

“And your sanity?”

 

Harry snorted at the dark look his dad shot Professor McGonagall. His mum giggled. “Oh, I think I want to meet this family. Come on, Sev, this girl doesn't sound so bad. She actually took the time to write to Harry.” She scanned the letter a moment. “She wrote a decently long one at that. The least we could do is meet them.”

 

“You can meet them, Lils. I have already had the … pleasure … after one too many broken rules the twins' first year in attendance.”

 

“Well, I'll go meet them, then. I'll contact Mrs. Weasley and see about setting up a meeting. Would you like to get acquainted with the girl, Harry?”

 

Harry's face heated as all eyes turned to him. “Er, sure, I guess. It could be nice to have a friend before school starts. In her letter, she said I could write to her whenever I wanted.”

 

“I'll send out a letter, then.”

 

SSLE

 

“Tell me about these Weasleys.”

 

Severus and Lily sat in their usual spot on the sofa once Harry had gone to bed, Lily's back pressed against Severus' side, his right arm propped on the sofa back, fingers toying with strands of her hair. Rather than answer, the fingers of his left hand slowly skimmed along her arm to her elbow and returned to her wrist repeatedly. The fruity scent of raspberries wrapped itself around him with each breath he took. He loved the softness of her skin. Ducking his head, he pressed several kisses into her hair.

 

“Sev?”

 

Lily's breathless question jolted him back to awareness of his actions. Caught up in the onslaught of sensations, he'd moved from simple kisses in her hair to kissing along the shell of her ear, heading toward that sensitive spot just behind her lobe and under her jaw. Heart pounding, Severus dropped his head to the sofa back with a sigh, struggling to even out his ragged breathing. _Damn! Control, Snape! Control!_

 

Lily's fingers trailed fire in their wake as her hand slid up his thigh. Covering her hand with his and burying his nose in her hair, Severus said in a raspy voice, “I apologize, Lily, for allowing it to get so far.”

 

“If you'd just let me touch you, it might help.”

 

“Momentarily, perhaps, but I would rather fully experience that with you without threat of interruptions, not as some one-sided encounter worthy of a hormonal teenager.”

 

“Who says it would be one-sided?” Lily shifted around to straddle his lap. “It would definitely not be one-sided. I can guarantee that.”

 

Severus tightly gripped her hips with trembling hands to hold her in place at his knees when she made to scoot closer. “Damn, Lils, this is difficult enough.”

 

“I know. I'm sorry.” Leaning forward, she whispered in his ear. “Tomorrow, though, there will be no interruptions. We'll have from breakfast to dinner, just to ourselves. Be ready because I plan on making up for ten years' worth of lost time.”

 

Her words quickened his breath further. Looking into her beautiful bright green eyes, he asked, "How do you know this?"

 

Kissing the bridge of his nose, she gave him a smile full of promise. “I just do.” Returning to her original position of sitting at his side, she threaded her fingers with his. “Now, tell me about this Weasley family.”

 

SSLE

 

“Lily, Severus, would it be okay if I borrowed Harry this morning? I could use a little help in greenhouse one. That is, if Harry is interested.”

 

Severus exchanged meaningful glances with Lily at breakfast the following morning before turning to Harry. “Is that something that would interest you, Harry?”

 

“Yes, I think so. I kind of like watching things grow, tending them, and stuff.”

 

Pomona Sprout, who had just returned to the castle the day before, beamed. “Excellent! We'll get started after breakfast. Don't worry about your clothes. I have something that will protect them from getting too soiled.”

 

Poppy Pomfrey spoke up next. “Harry, you have wonderful handwriting. I could use some help this afternoon relabeling my potions bottles.” She threw a glance at Severus before continuing with a grin. “ _Someone_ has terrible penmanship. It would be nice to be able to read the labels clearly."

 

“Okay,” Harry agreed, shrugging.

 

“Wonderful! We'll eat lunch up in the hospital wing to save some time.”

 

Just as Severus' heart began rejoicing, Albus sent it plummeting into despair with his request. “That reminds me, Severus. There is something I need to discuss with you. Perhaps once breakfast is finished?”

 

As Severus turned away from another meaningful glance at Lily, barely masking his frustration and heartache, he did not miss the annoyed looks Pomona, Poppy, and Minerva threw at Albus. He had no time to ponder over it because Minerva insisted she had to speak to Albus after breakfast, that the talk with Severus would have to wait. Severus tried to tell her with a single look how grateful he was for her intervention, and the older witch's slight nod told him she'd received his message.

 

As the breakfast gathering began to break up, Lily reminded Harry to be on his best behavior and to follow whatever direction from the professors that he was given. Severus, having figured out the three witches had conspired to give him and Lily some time alone, couldn't look at any of them now, fearing he would do something stupid like blush spectacularly. They had to know precisely how he and Lily would be spending that time, and the idea that his colleagues would know even that much of his personal life was nearly more than he could handle.

 

Standing, he took Lily's hand. Together, they walked out of the Great Hall at a pace they hoped was close to normal. Once they were halfway down the dungeon stairs, Severus grinned down at Lily, and the two of them practically ran the remaining distance to his private rooms. After he let them inside, Severus took the time to turn off his connection to the Hogwarts Floo. No interruptions. Not this time. That done, he turned back and found Lily near the corridor that led to his bedroom. His long-legged strides crossed the expanse of the room quickly. In one fluid motion, he picked her up, her legs wrapping around his waist, and his lips finally found hers in a bruising, desperate, open kiss that nearly did him in.

 

One arm at her hips, the other hand tangled in her hair, he kissed along her jaw to that sensitive spot at her earlobe and then down to her neck and up again to her lips, all the while walking them to his room. One of her hands slid into his hair, while the other busied itself with the buttons of his clothing. Severus rejoiced in the sensation of having her hands on him, and his on her, again. He had never felt more complete than when he was with Lily.

 

“Damn, Lily, I missed you,” Severus all but whispered, as he grazed her forehead, eyes, nose, and lips with his own. “I missed this.”

 

“I missed you, too, Sev.”

 

Then, it was her turn to torture him as she skimmed her lips along the same path his had taken before returning for another needy kiss. Still holding tightly to her, Severus fumblingly attempted to pull her shirt up over her head, breaking their kiss only long enough to get the offending garment out of the way, not wanting to part from her. He needed her lips on his like he needed air to breathe. Nearing the end of his willpower, Severus helped her to her feet, a gasp and low moan escaping him as she pressed intimately against him.

 

Being so close to the edge already, he was sorely tempted to push her against the wall, hip to hip. It wouldn't take much to get the relief he sought. A little pressure. Maybe a bit of friction. In the end, he didn't do so. Lily deserved better than a pseudo act against his bedroom wall, especially for the first time of their reunion. Yes, it would get him what he needed, but he didn't want it that way. Hell, they both deserved better. With hands shaking from need, the waistband of her jeans proved to be a bit of an issue for him as her fingers still worked on his jacket.

 

“Sev, I swear, I will burn this thing. There are way too many buttons. What possessed you to wear it today of all days?”

 

“Obviously, my common sense deserted me.”

 

Finally, nothing stood between them. Picking her up again, Severus fell to the bed with her underneath him. It was glorious torture to be skin-to-skin again! Lips found lips, tongues meeting in an age-old dance, panting breaths and gasping moans filling the silence. Her feet met at the small of his back, and her arms wrapped around his chest, fingernails digging into his back. Her hips bucked beneath him and his followed her lead, Severus hoping against hope he didn't embarrass himself this time, silently praying to whatever deity may be out there that he would last, but feared he would not. He slid his arms under Lily's shoulders and cupped her head. Blood pounded in his veins, pushing him toward what he so desperately wanted, and he hadn't even done the thing properly yet.

 

Her hips ground against his and Severus couldn't take any more. “Lils, I … This will be … humiliatingly … quick.”

 

“Not complaining. Just love me.”

 

“Always.”

 

After nearly twelve years, the two became one again. The instant his desire became a reality, what little control he had shattered. Lost in the sensory overload, his body took over, taking precisely what it had needed. A few frenzied thrusts. That was all it took to find the release he had craved, spilling into her with a strangled gasp, hips jerking with each pleasurable pulse. Almost immediately, Lily tensed beneath him, her inner walls gripping him tightly before rhythmically contracting around him, her own release enhancing his. The lead-up may not have taken long, but the payoff seemed to last forever.

 

Eventually coming down from the sensual high, Severus all but collapsed, chest heaving in great gulps of air, feeling utterly complete. He made to move, but Lily wouldn't let him. “I will crush you, Lils.”

“No, you won't.”

 

Shaking, Severus remained above her for a few moments before gathering his strength and rolling to his back, pulling Lily close to his chest. Dropping a kiss to her damp forehead, he closed his eyes, only now that he wasn't focused on another objective could he truly appreciate the feel of being skin-to-skin with the woman he loved. He had never thought he would feel this way again. Tears filled his eyes, and a sudden lump in his throat caused his voice to sound a bit gruff when he spoke.

 

“I love you, Lily.”

 

“I love you, too, Sev. Always have.” Lily was silent a few moments, then let out a chuckle. “Just like our first time. Do you remember that?”

 

Severus ran a hand over his face, a little exasperated, and more than a bit embarrassed at his lack of self-control, his expression contorting into a scowl. "Must you remind me of my disgraceful show of self-restraint?"

 

Lily raised up onto her elbow to look down at him, and Severus could see a grin toying with the corners of her mouth. “Disgraceful? Hardly. As I recall, both of us had – I believe the term is – hair-triggers and thoroughly enjoyed ourselves. Both times. I wasn't complaining.” Leaning forward, she gently brushed her lips against his. “So, no brooding over perceived … shortcomings.”

 

Severus snorted. “Brooding is a Gryffindor trait, as I recall stating.” Rolling onto his side to face her, he quipped wryly, “Puns, dear Lily? I would have thought you better than that.” He couldn't hold back the smile when he felt her snuggle against him.

 

“Usually, but at the moment, I really don't care.”

 

The nearly-star-crossed lovers remained wrapped around each other as they dozed. The next time Severus awakened, light kisses tenderly trailed down his chest, a feminine hand passing his stomach as fingertips trailed southward, and he inhaled sharply, pressing against her hand when it reached its destination, gently caressing him. Now, this was an incredible way to awaken. Feeling himself stir, he brought her lips back to his in a slow, sensual, almost lazy kiss, their previous urgency spent. Severus allowed his free hand to wander the dips and rises of Lily's contours, learning how full adulthood changed her body. His thumb lingered over a nipple, relishing the feel of it hardening as she moaned into their kiss. His hand continued its journey, lightly callused fingers gently mapping the dip of her waist, the flare of her hips, and the length of thigh he could reach before moving inward.

 

As the backs of his fingers brushed her tight curls, her hips tilted into his touch, her breath hitching. Severus kept his hand moving on its rising path. Lily had other plans, however, as she protested his neglect by releasing him to cover his hand, shoving it back in the opposite direction.

 

“Touch me, Sev.” Lily's warm breath feathered across his cheek. “Please. I want to feel your hands on me again.”

 

Unable to deny her, Severus complied. She shifted positions a little to allow him better access. Her hand continued its previous ministrations as his fingers brushed her with the lightest of touches, their tips finding her opening, while his thumb softly grazed the little nub he had learned of so long ago and was rewarded with a press of her hips and her own quick intake of breath. Lily's hand tightened a little on him, using long strokes. Desire sharpening, Severus allowed himself a moment of pleasure at the movement, flexing into the caresses, eyes drifting shut – but only for a moment.

 

Breath quickening, he massaged around and across the opening at his fingertips, his thumb rubbing the little bead. Her moan against his neck urged him onward, her lips trailing liquid fire everywhere they went, from his neck to his jaw, his lips, his ear and back again. Feeding off her response, Severus quickened his caresses, one fingertip dipping into her, smirking when Lily's hips jerked, a little desperate noise escaping her lips, his name a gasp falling from them a moment later. Her hand squeezed as its pace increased, her thumb seemingly reaching every sensitive spot he had. Once again, he thought he just may lose control prematurely. Breathing labored, Severus withdrew his finger, immediately plunging it deep inside her, repeating the motion, and found himself just as affected by the action as Lily.

 

About the time Severus thought he should remove Lily's hand lest he put a premature end to their activities, she did it herself, pushing his hand from her. He had no time to think as she shoved him to his back and straddled his hips. Her hands on either side of his head, she kissed his nose and grinned.

 

“Not like that. I want you inside me when we come. Maybe later we can do it the other way, but right now, I need you too much.”

 

Severus barely had time to catch a breath before she had taken him inside her, grinding her hips against his, eliciting moans from them both. Wrapping his arms around her hips, he held her in place as he countered the rapid pace Lily set. To Severus, she made an incredibly erotic picture, expression of intense concentration, lips parted, green eyes darkened with desire staring into his almost-black ones. This time around, he lasted long enough for Lily to finish first, though it was a close thing, the visual of her head tossed back, eyes closed, and lips parted as she found her release sending him instantly following, that picture forever etched into his memory.

 

Eventually, she went limp, dropping her forehead to his. Severus, breathing ragged, lifted his head from his pillow the scant distance necessary to briefly touch his lips to hers before letting it fall back again. His hands, fingers splaying, left Lily's hips to slide up her back where he caressed her as they recovered.

 

“Damn, Lils." It was all he could think to say. And really, that summed it up reasonably well.

 

Lily chuckled. "My sentiments exactly." She looked at him with a tilted head. "You never used to swear before, but I like it. It's rather sexy coming from you. But then again, I shouldn't be surprised. You practically ooze it."

 

Severus' lips curled smugly, one hand combing through the damp hair at her temple. “There are some instances in which swearing is most apt. You are incredible at the ego stroking.”

 

Lily grinned impishly. “Oh, is that what you're calling it, now? Your ego? Well, I guess it's a good thing you're enjoying yourself since I'm nowhere near finished stroking your … ego.”

 

Severus' brows jumped but his amusement got the better of him, and he laughed out loud, hugging Lily close to him. "You alone, Lily, could ever make me laugh. You have no idea how much you mean to me."

 

Leaning on hands planted next to his ears, her hair thrown to one side, Lily studied him. “No more sleeping on the sofa, Sev. I want you at my side. Promise me. Harry's fine. I can't go back to being apart.”

 

Severus reached up to tuck a strand of hair behind her ear that had fallen into her face and lovingly caressed her cheek. “Nor can I. No more sleeping apart, Lily. I promise.”

 

“Good.” Dipping her head, she kissed his nose, then his forehead.

 

“Lils, what is this fascination with my nose? It is hideous and poor Harry was cursed with it.”

 

“Nonsense, Severus. There's absolutely nothing hideous about you. It's a part of the things that make you you, just like it's part of what makes him Harry.” To emphasize her point, Lily dropped another kiss to the side of his nose.

 

Cuddling together, they quickly fell asleep. Sometime later, Severus awakened to a growling stomach. Glancing at the clock beside his bed, he saw it was half ten. Suppressing a yawn, he tightened his arms around Lily, still marveling that she was back in them and in his bed. He closed his eyes, thinking to return to his slumber, but his stomach wouldn't let him. Severus let out a resigned breath. He was going to have to get up.

 

Lily stirred, giggling. “Poor Sev. Use up all your fuel, did we? I guess I better feed you if you're going to last the rest of the day.”

 

Lily's stomach rumbled, making Severus chuckle. “I am not alone, then.”

 

He still felt tired and all his muscles ached from the previous strain, but he would not admit to it. Pulling on his trousers, he reached for his white, collared shirt, catching sight of the brand on his arm. Disgusted with it, he turned his back on Lily and quickly shoved his arm into the sleeve, buttoning the cuff.

 

“Sev, don't. Don't try to hide it. You know it doesn't bother me, nor does it bother Harry.”

 

“And if it disturbs me? It is a reminder of a time I would rather forget, of the mistakes I have made and the things I have lost.”

 

Lily came around to face him, one hand lightly wrapped around his left wrist, her other hand cupping his face, thumb caressing along his cheekbone. “But you haven't lost us. We're here. As for the mistakes, you were nineteen years old. If you can't make mistakes then, when can you?”

 

Sinking onto his bed, Severus pulled Lily between his knees, wrapped his arms around her, and dropped his head to her stomach. “You are too forgiving.”

 

“And you're not forgiving enough when it comes to yourself.”

 

Severus didn't object when Lily reached behind her and pulled his left arm between them. Nor did he pull away when she slowly slid the button on his cuff from its hole. Very deliberately, she pushed the sleeve up to his elbow, revealing the faded but still visible brand. Severus kept his eyes averted from it, even when Lily lightly traced the lines that made up the Dark Mark. He _did_ look up when she raised his arm and touched her lips to his skin, skimming them over every line, her amazingly beautiful green eyes never leaving his dark, transfixed gaze.

 

“I told you, Severus Hadrian Snape, that I love everything about you. This,” Lily ran a finger along the evil design, “is a testament to everything you've endured. Think of it as a symbol of your victory over him, because that's exactly what you should call it. A victory. You're still here. You still love. He wasn't able to strip that from you and never will.”

 

Moisture pooled in Severus' eyes and, for once, he didn't try to hide them as, first one, then another, trickled down his cheek. Getting to his feet, he reverently kissed her lips. “I vow to prove my worth to you every single day, Lily.”

 

“You already have, Sev.”

 

Once Lily finished dressing, the two ate an early lunch, then retired to Severus' bedroom. They spent some time merely talking about everything and nothing. After a while, the speaking turned nonverbal as each of them worshipped the other with lips and hands, intimately reacquainting themselves with the bodies they had once known. Urgency spent, they enjoyed the journey that ultimately culminated in an intensely emotional, though no less passionate, finish.

 

Exhaustion finally won out, and they lay together, falling into a deep sleep.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 


	3. Woeful Newness

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Just a little more intimacy near the beginning of this chapter. Enjoy!

“ _ **What is ordinary to you may be a desert of woeful newness to another.”**_ _ **  
**__**―**_ _ **Richard Llewellyn,**_[ _ **How Green Was My Valley**_](https://www.goodreads.com/work/quotes/2329482)

 

 

“Sev! _Sev!_ Wake up!”

 

Severus pried his eyes open, the demanding voice not allowing anything less than compliance, his own voice sleep-roughened when he responded. “What?”

 

“Sev, we overslept. We have exactly a half hour to get up to the Great Hall for dinner.”

 

Adrenaline woke him instantly. “Damn!” Severus jumped up to look for his clothes, noticing Lily already dressed, hair perfectly brushed. “How is it you are completely ready?”

 

Lily rocked up onto her toes, grinning wickedly. “Well, I may have let you sleep a little longer to, you know, build up your energy. I did wake up not that long ago, though.”

 

After pulling on his trousers, Severus, smirking, grabbed his white shirt and donned it, taking a few extra moments to be sure each button was in its proper place and sliding his wand into his sleeve. He did still feel worn out, but he did not regret any of their day together. How could he? It had been perfect! Tucking the shirttail into his trousers and buckling his belt, he slid his feet into his boots before heading to the lavatory to splash a bit of cold water on his face, hoping it would help to awaken him. A quick Freshening Charm later, Severus ran his brush through his hair and was ready to go.

 

Threading his fingers with Lily's, Severus led them from their quarters, down the long corridor, around corners, and up the dungeon stairs. As they reached the Entrance Hall, he spotted Poppy coming down the main marble staircase with Harry, the two of them discussing something of importance if their expressions were anything to judge by. He and Lily waited by the massive doors to the Great Hall for the other two to join them.

 

“Did you have a good day, sweetheart?”

 

“Yes! It was so much fun. In the greenhouses, Professor Sprout let me transplant some of her seedlings and trim her Color-Change roses. That took a bit of work because she wanted blooms of certain colors for a bouquet. Madame Pomfrey had me relabel all of her bottles and reorganize her files.”

 

Severus' brow arched. “You allowed him near confidential information?”

 

Poppy tossed him a glare. “I made sure he didn't see any details. Really, Severus. I thought you knew me better than that.”

 

“I'd like to do something like that again. Maybe with the other professors.”

 

The three adults exchanged amused glances, though Severus had to fight to keep his cheeks from reddening as he silently agreed. _He_ would like to do that again. Multiple times. As often as Lily was willing.

 

Lily chuckled, mussing Harry's hair. “I'm sure that can be arranged.”

 

Once seated around the dinner table, Minerva asked Harry from across from them, buttering a slice of bread, “So, Harry, did you have a satisfactory day?”

 

“Yes, ma'am.” Harry excitedly launched into the details of everything he had been allowed to do.

 

Severus concentrated on his dinner, fearful that one look at them would reveal how he and Lily had been occupied. Any of his colleagues knowing anything of that nature when it came to the two of them made him genuinely uncomfortable. He refused to acknowledge the fact that his and Lily's day had been arranged by a few of those colleagues; therefore, they must have had a good idea what had occurred.

 

“And you, Lily? Have a good time? Didn't spend too much energy? Missing Harry, I mean?”

 

Severus choked on the tea he had been in the process of swallowing when Minerva had spoken. It took the _Anapneo_ spell to get Severus breathing properly again.

 

“Are you okay, Dad?”

 

Severus, eyes watery, cleared his throat. “I am well, Harry. It merely went down the wrong way.” He picked up his water goblet and took a few sips.

 

Lily leaned close, turning away from the others and whispered in Severus' ear. “I don't know about that. It felt fairly right to me.”

 

Luckily for Severus, his mouth was empty when she made that highly suggestive comment. No amount of effort could have prevented the color staining his cheeks. Ducking his head, he used his hair to hide the evidence from the others' view. He wanted to glare at Lily for embarrassing him – even more so because of the humor he heard in her voice when she answered Minerva's question – but to do so, he had to raise his head, and he just could not do that at the moment. A sly grin slowly stretched his lips. He would find another way to exact his revenge. He was a Slytherin, after all. All was fair in love and war, as the saying went, and, while this was more of a skirmish than a war, the sentiment still fit.

 

SSLE

 

Back in their quarters, Lily dropped her hand onto Harry's shoulder and steered him into his room. She glanced in Severus' direction, seeing him disappear into his lab. They had talked about this conversation with Harry earlier and decided Lily would be the one to talk to him. She wasn't really nervous about Harry's reaction, it was just an awkward talk to have with your eleven-year-old son. How did a mother go about telling her son she and his father were going to be sharing a bed? Of course, that was as far as the conversation would go, for now. When it came time for _that_ chat, it would be Sev's turn. For a moment, she grinned at what would be his reaction to having the Quaffles and Quidditch hoops talk with Harry. Horrified, no doubt.

 

“What's wrong, Mum? What did you want to talk about? I was on my best behavior today. I promise.”

 

“It's not that, sweetheart.” Lily motioned to Harry's bed. “Sit down.” Lily pulled up Harry's desk chair and sat in front of him. “Now, as you know – at least I hope you know – when two people love each other –”

Harry wrinkled his nose in distaste. “Ugh, Mum. Do we really need to talk about this?”

 

Chuckling silently, Lily held up a hand. “I promise, this will be quick. It's just a little difficult to talk about. Bear with me, okay?” With Harry's nod, she continued. “Okay, well, as I was saying, when two people love each other, they will often … sleep in the same room. As you also know, since we came to Hogwarts, your dad has been gracious enough to give up his bedroom for me.”

 

“I know. I got up to get a drink of water once. I saw Dad on the sofa." Harry frowned as he seemed to think about the moment. "I think he was dreaming, muttering about something. I don't think it was a good dream, either."

 

A furrow appeared between Lily's brows. It shouldn't surprise her that Sev would be haunted by memories of his past activities. Maybe she should try to get him to talk about the things he'd been forced to do. It was a long shot, but it might help him find peace with his past. The trick would be to actually get him to talk. That, however, was for another time.

 

“What I wanted to say to you, Harry, is that from tonight on, if you were to get up to get another drink, you wouldn't see your dad on the sofa. He'll be in his bedroom … with me.”

 

Lily waited as Harry processed what he'd been told. After a few moments, Harry shrugged. “Okay.”

 

“That's it? No questions?”

 

“No. Should I have any?”

 

“I want to be sure you understand. We won't just be in the same room. I want you to be prepared in case you ever need to come in there, like if you're sick or you have a nightmare, or something.”

 

Harry rolled his eyes. “I know, Mum. I get it. I _have_ been over at friends' houses before. I've seen their parents' rooms. I know there's only one bed.”

 

“And you're okay with your dad and me…?"

 

“You love Dad, don't you?”

 

“I do.”

 

“And he loves you?”

 

“He does.”

 

Harry shrugged again. “Then, okay.”

Lily let out a little, relieved breath. “Well, okay, then. That's all I wanted to talk to you about.”

 

Standing, Lily slid Harry's chair back into place. She headed for the door when Harry called to her. “Mum?”

 

The hesitancy in Harry's voice concerned Lily enough to join him on his bed, running a hand reassuringly through his hair. “What is it?”

 

“I was just wondering … well, what will my name be?”

 

That had not been the question she had expected. She and Severus had also talked about having that conversation with Harry; they just hadn't as of yet. It looked like now was a good time for it. First, though, she was curious to know what Harry thought.

 

“I assume you mean your last name. What do you want it to be?”

 

“I don't know. I mean, I _was_ Harry Potter for a year of my life – longer if you officially count the time out of the country. I'm not sure I do count that, though, because it didn't matter what my last name was. Besides, I haven't really thought of myself as _Potter_ since the day you told me about Dad and I actually understood what you meant.” Harry studied his duvet, forefinger tracing the serpentine stitching. “I don't want to completely erase James, though. He took care of us and died trying to protect us.” Harry paused again, appearing to gather his thoughts. “Would Dad even want me to take his name? Would he be mad if I stayed a Potter?”

 

“Oh, sweetheart. He'd love for you to take his name, but no, he wouldn't be mad if you chose James' over his. Why don't you go talk to him about it? He and I have discussed this between the two of us and had planned on talking to you. Now is as good a time as any to have that talk.”

 

“Okay. Will you come with me?”

 

Standing, Lily smiled and held out her hand. “Of course I will.”

 

Crossing to the lab, Lily rapped a knuckle on the open door, knowing Severus preferred not to be disturbed if he was working unless it was an emergency. Even though she'd worked in there with him, and he'd as much said it was her lab, too, Lily couldn't help feeling it wasn't hers – at least not yet.

 

“Are you busy, Sev?” He didn't look it. He currently leaned against a table, arms loosely crossed over his chest and watched as many little potion bottles washed themselves.

 

“Not with anything that could not wait for another time. Is something wrong?”

 

“Not really. Harry just had a question or two for you.”

 

Lily could have kissed Severus for what the man did next. Straightening, he stopped the bottles with a wave of his hand, patted a stool next to him at the table, then sat, giving Harry his full attention. Again, Lily wanted to scoff at his notion that he didn't know how to be a good father. For someone who claimed insecurity, he was doing an excellent job so far.

 

Lily joined the two at the table, but left it up to Harry to ask what he wanted to ask; she was there merely for support.

 

“Well, I asked Mum what name I would have now. I mean, I'm not exactly a Potter, am I? But, then again, that's how everyone knows me. James gave up a lot for Mum and me – he died for us – and I'd kind of hate to lose any connection to him.”

 

“I understand, Harry. If you prefer to remain a Potter, then, that is what you shall be.”

 

“You wouldn't be upset if I chose to do that?”

 

“No, I would not. It is as you have said, James Potter did much for you, shared much with you, that I … that I could not. He deserves to be honored.”

 

“I _would_ like to go by my proper last name, though, too. I don't know what to do.”

 

“That is a decision I cannot make for you. I will support whichever it happens to be.”

 

Harry nodded a moment solemnly, then groaned. "I feel so stupid. I'm already named after him. I don't have to carry his last name, too. I can take yours."

 

Lily secretly smiled, wondering when her son was going to remember his middle name. Studying Severus, she could see a slight conflict within him and wondered at its source. Naturally, she knew James and Severus had a terrible history until James matured, but Severus hadn't shown any animosity at any mention of James in the last few days, had even spoken James' name without the biting scorn the way it used to be. Maybe it was the fact that, in the Wizarding world, a lot of first-born sons were named after their fathers. By rights, Harry should have carried the name Harry Severus Snape. Lily knew the man very well. He would never ask, or even hint to, Harry to change that much of his name.

 

“Then, it shall be considered settled. We will need to go to the Ministry to change the official record, as well as to Gringotts. I have yet been able to add the two of you to my vault's access list.”

 

“Sev, you don't have to –”

 

“Lily, do not attempt to argue with me over the issue of my vault. You will not win. Harry is my son. By right of his birth, he will be named as my heir. You, as his mother, have the right to my account. I wish it to be _our_ account.”

 

Looking into his fiercely determined gaze, Lily sighed in resignation. “Fine. I do have plenty of gold of my own, though.”

 

“I did not mean to imply that you had no gold, Lils. Obviously, you have done well for yourself and Harry. I merely wish to help.”

 

“Then, let me add what I have to yours. If you really want it to be _our_ vault, then we should combine what we have.”

 

“Fair enough.”

 

That evening, thirty minutes after Harry went to bed, Lily – after listening to Severus suppress a fifth yawn – hauled him off to bed. Noticing the quick glance Severus flicked at Harry's door, Lily cupped her lover's face and kissed his nose.

 

“Harry is fine with it, Sev. Don't worry so much.”

 

Lying against Severus' side, tired though she was, Lily still wanted him, wanted to be one with him. She couldn't seem to get enough of it. Briefly, she wondered if he felt up to it at all. Maybe she could do all the work, and he could sit back and enjoy it. Half-leaning over him, she lightly kissed his chest over his heart, smiling to herself at its rapid beat.

 

“Lils?”

 

Lily shushed him with a gentle kiss, having to straddle him to do so. In that position, she could easily tell he wasn't immune to her proximity. Before he could offer any objection, she slowly took him in, luxuriating in the feel of him, remaining perfectly still.

 

“I should be too tired for this.”

 

And yet, he so obviously wasn't. Lily only smiled, kissing him again, keeping it slow and simple. She had a plan and _would_ stick to it. The longer she remained motionless, the more of an effect it had on them. He tried to coax her into a rhythm, but that wasn't her plan, so she withdrew from him for several long moments. Apparently, catching on, his movements stilled, his hands tugging her back into place. To Lily, it was the most exquisite feeling in the world, both sensational and torturous. The self-imposed restriction heightened the experience, giving their desires a distinct edge. Still, Lily refused to allow any movement, focusing on teasing him with light kisses across his cheeks, over his nose, his lips, jaw, and back up to where she started.

 

“Damn, Lily, you are likely to kill me if…”

 

Grinning wickedly at his unfinished breathless statement, she whispered brokenly, “Glad you're enjoying it as much as I am.”

 

“Lils, I need to …”

 

Lily did, too. The pressure building to the point of eruption, she broke her 'rule' and ground her hips into his, sparking the explosions that roughly took them over the edge, mouths fused together to swallow their moans. As before, it seemed to last forever, the fierce release a fine line between pleasure and pain.

 

Sweaty, trembling, and utterly spent, Lily buried her face into Severus' neck. “That's it. I can't move. I'm sleeping just like this.”

 

Breathing so hard he had a hard time getting the words out, Severus half-laughed and said, “You would hear … of no complaints … from me.”

 

Just as Lily started to drift off, she felt Severus tense under her. “What's wrong?”

 

“Lily, we neglected to do something today, which may have resulted in a situation for which we are not prepared.”

 

At first, Lily struggled to get her sleep-deprived, feel-good-chemical-soaked brain to function. “What? Oh, no, don't worry. We're fine.” She let out a tired laugh. “You can sleep, Sev, with a clear conscience.”

 

SSLE

 

Two days later, Lily and Harry were preparing to take a Portkey to The Burrow to meet the Weasleys. Lily didn't feel nervous – yet. Maybe once she was at the other house, she would. If the meeting went well, Harry would have a good friend before starting school. If it didn't, well, Lily didn't want to think about the ramifications.

 

“You should come, Sev.” Lily had been trying for the past half an hour to get him to come along to no avail.

 

“And what is it I am supposed to do if I were to go, Lils? Arthur Weasley works at the Ministry. He will not be present. I daresay the Weasley children would not be pleased to see their most despised professor in their home.”

 

“And whose fault is that?" When Severus merely looked at her with an eyebrow raised, she sighed. "Fine. I guess you do have that trip to the Ministry and Gringotts to make."

 

“Precisely.”

 

“Alright, well, have fun, though I think I'll be the one having more fun.”

 

Lily grinned, rose on her tiptoes, pecked Severus on the lips, then, thumbed away the remnants of lip gloss from his mouth. Dressed in an ankle-length, flowing, cinnamon brown skirt, ivory tank top, and brown sandals, she'd left her slightly wavy, dark red hair free to cascade down her back. Turning to call out to Harry, she found him standing on the other side of the sitting room, dressed in blue jean shorts, red t-shirt imprinted with a pictorial representation of the evolution of different racing brooms, socks, and trainers. He wore an expression that Lily wasn't sure how to interpret. Had he seen her kiss his father? Now that she thought about it, had he ever witnessed that? She didn't think so. That should be easy to remedy. Harry needed to see her and Sev express their feelings for one another beyond hand-holding.

 

“Ready, then?”

 

Harry shrugged. “Yeah, I guess.”

 

With a knowing smile, she asked, “Nervous?”

 

Color stained her son's cheeks as he answered. “A little.”

 

“Just be yourself, Harry. I know that's easy to say, but it really is the truth.”

 

“Lils, the Portkey will be activating soon. You do not want to miss it.”

 

“Right. Okay.”

 

Fully aware Harry was watching, Lily gave Severus another kiss, wiped away the lip gloss with a grin, then grabbed her wand to tuck into the waistband of her skirt. With a smile and a wave, she gathered Harry, and the two of them made their way out beyond the main gate so the Portkey could activate.

 

They arrived beside a dirt lane, a Quidditch pitch-length from a dilapidated, lopsided home that looked as if it had been assembled haphazardly and was held up by magic alone. Tucking the quill into her pocket, Lily placed a hand on Harry's shoulder and gave him a light push to get him moving. It didn't take long for them to reach the front door. Lily had barely knocked when an older, plump woman with bright red hair greeted them.

 

“Oh, hello! It's so good to meet you! Come in, come in!”

 

“Thank you. It was so nice of you to invite us over. Severus couldn't come; he had a couple of errands he needed to do.” The expression on Mrs. Weasley's face told Lily the woman didn't entirely believe her. Lily chuckled. “Yeah, okay, I'll admit he wasn't too certain he'd be welcome, but he really did have a couple of errands.”

 

Mrs. Weasley rubbed her hands on the apron she wore over a homespun blue dress. “Well, it may have been a bit awkward. I've heard my sons talk about their experiences with him.” She glanced quickly at Harry, looking apologetic. “I'm sorry. I shouldn't say anything.”

 

“No, it's fine. Harry and I are aware of Severus' reputation.” Lily winked at Mrs. Weasley. “I'm hoping to get him to loosen up a bit.”

 

Chuckling, Mrs. Weasley led them into the kitchen. “Have some tea. Harry, it's nice to meet you.”

 

“Thank you, ma'am. It was nice of Ginny to send me that letter. I really appreciated it.”

 

“What a little gentleman. I'll go get her." Mrs. Weasley wandered to the stairs and called up to her daughter to come down. Footsteps came bounding down the stairs, and Mrs. Weasley returned with Ginny in tow. "Ginny, this is Mrs. Potter and Harry."

 

To Lily, Ginny looked like a miniature version of her mother with the same fiery red hair and light brown eyes. Freckles dotted the girl's face and bare arms. Stepping forward, Lily held out her hand. “Hello, Ginny. I wanted to thank you for your kind letter to Harry. It meant a lot to us.”

 

Ginny smiled sheepishly, her cheeks reddening. “It was nothing, Mrs. Potter. Hi, Harry.” She caught sight of his shirt and gasped. “Do you like to fly?”

 

Harry's entire demeanor lit up. “I love flying! It's the greatest feeling! Do you like to fly?”

 

Ginny nodded enthusiastically. “I do, but Mum doesn't like me to. She says it's too dangerous.”

 

“Well, it can be.” Mrs. Weasley stared disapprovingly down at her daughter.

 

“But, Mum, it's fun! You let Ron fly, and he's only a year older than me. Hey, Harry can fly. Is it okay if I fly with him?" Ginny turned to Harry. "If it's okay with you, that is."

 

Harry shrugged. “Sure. I'd love to go flying.”

 

Mrs. Weasley looked uncertain, so Lily sought to reassure the other mother. “Harry's a good flier. He's been on a broom since the time he could walk. He's very experienced. I just thought you'd want to know. I'm not trying to influence your decision.”

 

The woman gazed at her daughter's pleading expression and sighed. “Alright, but no outrageous flying, no stunts.”

 

“We won't! Come on, Harry!”

 

Ginny grabbed Harry's wrist and pulled him through the back door. Lily grinned to herself. Ginny seemed to be a very strong-willed girl. That was good. In her opinion, her son needed friends who were strong enough to deal with the pressure that would likely come from being his friend.

 

“That's quite a little girl you have there.”

 

Mrs. Weasley beamed. “Thank you, Mrs. Potter. She's very headstrong. The whole lot of them are.”

 

Lily chuckled. “I can empathize. Both Harry and Severus are _unbelievably_ stubborn. By the way, call me Lily.”

 

“Then, call me Molly. Please, sit down.” Once they had taken seats at the table, Molly sipped her tea. “Have things calmed down since the interview was published?”

 

“Some. It was really tough, at first. Nothing but letters screaming how the famous Boy Who Lived should never be allowed near a Death Eater. Some of them called me an unfit mother for having cheated on my husband with anyone, much less a Death Eater, and that Harry should be taken from me. There were even a few calling Harry the next Dark wizard, and he should be," Lily gulped as her eyes filled with tears, "should be put down before he followed in his father's footsteps."

 

Molly's hands flew to her mouth. “How terrible! How could anyone say such awful things about an innocent child?!” Her expression morphed from horrified to angry. “The nerve of some people! They all conveniently forget the man had spied for Albus Dumbledore, that many more questionable people claimed coercion and didn't even have a trial! I'd be willing to bet this house that some of them weren't coerced at all.”

 

“Exactly! The hypocrisy of people is infuriating!”

 

“Well, enough about that. Tell me how it's been otherwise to be back.”

 

Lily smiled brilliantly. “It's been amazing. I've missed being here, seeing Hogwarts, and …”

 

Molly gave her a sympathetic smile. “And being back with the one you love. That can make a huge difference. It's good for Harry to have his father, not that I think you were wrong to stay away or anything. Please don't misunderstand me.”

 

“No, I do get it. Harry knew from the beginning that James wasn't his biological father, and as he got older, I told him what I knew of Severus, why he wasn't around. Harry accepted it all rather well. I think he was ready to meet his father finally." Lily laughed. "Poor Sev. He had no idea Harry was his, and when he found out, he was actually speechless. That's a rare occurrence, let me tell you."

 

Molly chuckled. “I can only imagine how shocked he must have been.”

 

“Believe it or not, he's taken to being a father well. He's been great with Harry. That first morning, when I got up, I found the two of them in Sev's personal lab, with him patiently teaching Harry about the potions he was brewing for Poppy.” Lily sighed dreamily at the memory. “It was such an incredible thing to see.” Sadly, she shook her head. “Sev worries he won't be good for Harry, but he's so wrong.”

 

Molly patted Lily's hand. “He'll figure it out. I'm sure all he needs is a bit of reassurance. I must confess, I find it a bit odd talking about the professor this way. The few times I've met him, it was due to my twin boys, and let's just say he was none too happy.”

 

Laughing at the memory of Severus' reaction to learning of Ginny's last name, Lily relayed it to Molly. “Those two frustrate Severus completely. I'd love to meet them sometime.”

 

A delighted shriek wafted in through the kitchen window. Both mothers looked outside to see Harry and Ginny playing chase on the Weasley brooms, Harry giving chase. “I'm not giving up! I'll get you yet!”

 

“Well, that seems to be going well.”

 

“Yes, it does. Ginny's birthday is in a few days. Why don't you bring Harry? I'm sure Ginny would love to have him.”

 

“Harry would love that. Thank you. What kinds of things does she like?”

 

“Oh, don't worry about that. Presents aren't necessary.”

 

“Nonsense. Harry will want to bring something. She likes to fly. Does she have a favorite Quidditch team? Favorite animal? Favorite color?”

 

“The Holyhead Harpies. She loves horses, especially the big draft horses, and cats. Green tends to be the color she likes the most. Really, though, don't go to any trouble. Just come.”

 

“It's no trouble. Harry and I will find something. You won't dissuade me from it.”

 

“Hey, Mum, why is Ginny flying? You never let her fly. Oh.”

 

Lily turned to the newest voice, a boy about Harry's age with the same flaming red hair and freckles as his mother. Instead of brown eyes, this boy had blue. From what Harry had divulged from the letter Ginny sent, the boy standing just out of the kitchen doorway must be Ron, and he was staring at her.

 

“Ron, don't be rude. This is Mrs. Potter. She was kind enough to bring Harry by to meet Ginny. She's flying with Harry.”

 

The tips of Ron's ears went red, and Lily felt certain the furrow in the boy's brow meant he didn't like having her and Harry at his house. She hoped he would come to see that Harry was just a kid like him, but knew it would take time.

 

“So, you won't let her fly with Fred and George, but you'll let her fly with someone younger? It's because he's famous, isn't it?”

 

Twin peals of laughter drifted in through the window again as two moderately racing blurs flew by, this time Harry being chased by Ginny. “You may be better on a broom, but I have a few tricks up my sleeve!”

 

“Oh yeah? Bring it on, Weasley! Let's see what you've got!”

 

“Sounds a bit arrogant.”

 

“Ronald Bilius Weasley! You did _not_ just insult a guest! Upstairs! _Now!_ I don't want to hear another sound out of you!”

 

A bit uncomfortable, Lily left the table, stepped out onto the back stoop and watched the kids fly. Ginny flew rather well for her age, keeping up with Harry, though, it could be that Harry wasn't trying really hard, either. Maybe bringing him here wasn't the best of ideas. No sooner had that thought formulated, Harry let out a sound of mild aggravation. Apparently, he had been tagged, and it was now his turn to chase.

 

“I'm so sorry about that, Lily." Molly stepped onto the back stoop. "I did not raise rude children, but unfortunately, two of my sons seem to think the worst of people sometimes. My middle son, Percy, he gets a little focused on propriety sometimes. Ron," Molly shook her head, "I don't know with that one. He has a bit of a temper. In the past year, he met and befriended this Irish boy, and I think that boy's short fuse, as they say, has only enhanced my son's. I'm sorry if you were offended."

 

“No, Molly, I wasn't. I don't want Harry's presence to cause any trouble in your family. Maybe we shouldn't have come.”

 

“Mum, what's with all the shouting?”

 

“And why is little Gin-Gin flying?”

 

Lily turned to the newest arrivals to see a set of twins, no doubt the ones that have so frustrated Severus the past two years. Where Ron was tall for his age, these two were short and stocky. Lily thought the entire Weasley clan must sport the same fiery red hair, for these two had it as well.

 

“Blimey! It's Mrs. Potter! Gred, if she's here, that must mean that –”

 

“– Harry's here! Forge, that must mean Harry's the one – ”

 

In unison, they finished with, “– flying with Ginny! He's good!”

 

Lily snickered. Yes, she could definitely see how these two could try Sev's patience. Their whimsical, full-of-fun natures would clash horribly with his practical ways. As she'd told Molly, Lily hoped to loosen him up a little.

 

“Fred, George, meet Mrs. Potter. And yes, that's Harry flying with Ginny.”

 

“Nice to meet you, ma'am,” one of the twins said. “Harry's really good. Has he played Quidditch?”

 

“Nice to meet you, too, Fred. Yes, he loves Quidditch. He prefers to play Seeker. He's not too horrible at it.”

 

Fred, mouth agape, stared at her. “How did you know I was Fred?”

 

With a sly grin, she said, "I didn't know until now." Lily really wished she could do the eyebrow thing. It would come in handy in situations like this.

 

Fred and George bowed formally. “Well played.”

 

“Mum, we're thirsty.” Ginny and Harry landed and walked up to the back stoop. “Is there any lemonade left? Oh, Harry, those are my brothers, Fred and George.”

 

“I'll get it. Come in and sit down for a few minutes.”

 

Harry greeted the twins before turning to Lily. “Mum, did you see Ginny fly? She's a natural!”

 

Lily smiled, amused by Harry's enthusiasm. "Yes, I did, and yes, she is. A lot like you, because I don't know where you get it. Must be someone on your father's side."

 

The twins had backed up and were having a quiet conversation, but Lily could still hear them. “It's uncanny, Gred.”

 

“That it is, Forge. It's like looking at a younger version of the professor.”

 

“Well, Gred, we sort of are, aren't we?”

 

“Right you are, Forge.”

 

“You two,” Molly hissed at them, brandishing a wooden spoon at them, “quit being rude. Honestly, the only one of my children so far to show any of the manners they'd been taught is Ginny.”

 

“It's alright, Molly. It's not the first time someone has pointed that out, and it won't be the last, I'm sure.”

 

“Nevertheless, they shouldn't be engaged in that kind of talk.”

 

Lily and Harry stayed a little while longer. When it was time for them to go, Lily promised she'd return with Harry on her birthday, which had the younger girl squealing. On the little trek out to the Apparition point, Lily asked what Harry thought about the girl.

 

“She seemed really nice. We get along great. It's weird, but it was like we'd always known each other. No awkwardness like it is sometimes.”

 

“Good. True friends are like that, Harry. Those are the ones you want to do everything you can to keep them in your life.”

 

SSLE

 

Going to a child's birthday party was not Severus' idea of fun. “Why must I go?”

“Because you didn't go with Harry and me to meet Molly and Ginny. Plus, it's Harry's friend, and they were polite enough to invite us."

 

“There are many things I still need to prepare for the upcoming year.”

 

“Sev, one day won't hurt. Besides, I know for a fact how organized you are. There's nothing more that really needs doing. You're not getting out of this.”

 

Seeing no way out, Severus heaved a sigh. “Very well. I will go to this accursed party, but do not chastise me for not socializing.”

 

“Wouldn't dream of it.”

 

“You would. I know you, Lils.”

 

Lily grinned. “Okay, I might have, but I won't this time. I promise.”

 

Standing on her tiptoes, Lily pressed a lingering kiss to his lips before walking away to finish getting ready. Severus watched her go, a long finger running along his lower lip where he would swear he could still feel her lips on his and could still taste them, all too aware Harry had witnessed said kiss. Lily seemed to do that a lot lately. Public displays of affection always made Severus uncomfortable, even though, technically, being in their quarters didn't exactly qualify as public. They had a witness, and that was close enough for him, even when that witness was his own son, who had taken to reacting by either rolling his eyes, huffing in annoyance or making gagging sounds. This time, he had shown no reaction at all. Likely too nervous.

 

“Do you have your gift to Miss Weasley?”

 

Harry held up the square, green-wrapped box. “Right here.”

 

Severus checked his pocket watch. Nearly time to go. He felt exposed without his customary black jacket, but Lily had forbidden him from wearing it, claiming it was too hot. Naturally, he had pointed out – with more snark than was necessary, he could admit – Cooling Charms existed, but she wouldn't budge. So, now, not only did he have to go to the home of several of his students, but he had to socialize, _and_ do it while wearing the white, collared shirt he always wore under the jacket. At least he could still keep his wand in its customary place. Severus had insisted on wearing his usual black trousers and boots, so he didn't feel entirely out of his element. Over the years, his clothes had lent him a bit of security in that they were familiar, unchanging, and he had come to rely on that feeling of familiarity.

 

Rechecking his pocket watch, Severus called out, "Lils, we need to go."

 

Rushing out, Lily said, “I'm here. I'm ready.”

 

Severus merely listened as Lily and Harry chatted on their way out to the Apparition point. Lily, having been there, could take them both. By the time they stepped outside Hogwarts' gates, Severus was convinced his attendance to this thing was a big mistake on his part. Quite likely, something would be said in jest, and he would get his hackles up as he often did and say something he shouldn't. His dark eyes left the path, found Harry and inwardly sighed. He would try, for Harry's sake. Miss Weasley _did_ seem like a good friend, though it was still rather early to know for sure. If Harry were to be Sorted into Slytherin – Severus allowed himself a small smile at the thought – what would the girl and her family say then? At the Apparition point, he took Lily's hand and blanked his mind so she could lead them there.

 

Lily had barely finished her knock when the door opened, and Arthur Weasley invited them. "Come in. Glad you could come. Harry, Ginny's talked nonstop about the fun she had the other day. Welcome back. Lily, Molly really enjoyed your visit. Do stop by again sometime before the start of the school year."

 

Severus watched the warm greetings for Harry and Lily and knew he would get no such greeting. As the Weasley patriarch's gaze moved to him, Severus could see the smile the man wore suddenly was forced, not out of anger or disgust as Severus had thought it would be, but more from awkwardness.

 

“Professor, I'm glad we could meet under more positive conditions.”

 

“I, as well. Since I am not here in any official capacity, call me Severus.”

 

The man's shocked gaze was enough to make Severus smile, if only inwardly. In the past, he had been adamant that his title was to be used when he was addressed. Making that change seemed to put the man off his guard, giving Severus the much-needed feeling of control in this situation. Perhaps this get-together would be better than he had initially thought. Arthur led them through the house and to the back garden, indicating the table for the presents, then Ginny's location, and finally, several chairs in the shade where he and Lily could sit.

 

SSLE

 

“Harry!”

 

Bill Weasley turned at his sister's squeal and nearly fell out of his seat. “Charlie, tell me you're seeing what I'm seeing.”

 

Charlie looked in the direction his older brother currently stared in, and his mouth dropped open. “I'm seeing it, I think, but I'm not believing it.” Molly was rushing by, so Charlie grabbed her arm. “Mum, is that _Professor Snape_ who just came out with Dad?”

 

The harried woman's gaze flew to the back of the house. “Oh, they did come! The professor, too! Now, boys, I'm sure he will be feeling just a bit odd, so do try to make him more comfortable. Make him feel welcome. I know it'll be difficult considering how you remember him, but you are adults now, and hopefully, can look at things with a bit more perspective.”

 

“Yes, Mum,” Bill replied, while Charlie nodded.

 

Molly rushed off to greet them. Bill continued studying his former professor. “He's not in all black today.”

 

Charlie laughed. “And his hair is clean. Well, he _is_ in the company of a woman.” His face screwed up in mild distaste. “Merlin, that feels really strange to say. Maybe she insisted.” Charlie shook his head. “I can still hear that monotone voice droning insults in my head.”

“Yeah, so can I. As for the woman, you do realize that's Mrs. Potter, right? Remember what Mum and Dad told us?”

 

Charlie shook his head again. "Yeah, I remember. I just have a hard time believing it. I mean, I don't doubt that it's true, it just seems so weird. Everything we thought we knew, we didn't know at all. Who would have thought that the Bat of the Dungeons could have loved anyone? And then, to be a father? That's just an image I would never have thought possible."

 

Bill chuckled. “I know. To top it all off, with the professor's past, he's the one who ends up being the Boy Who Lived's father!”

 

“Right? Do you think Harry is aware of the professor's past life? Surely, they would have told him, right? He's going to be hearing about it from everyone once school starts, I'm sure.”

 

Bill watched as his little sister and Harry chatted with Luna, a girl from just over the hill. Ron, who had been sitting there with Luna and Ginny, instantly left when Harry was brought over. When Ron plopped down onto the seat next to him, Bill took in the sullen posture.

 

“What's wrong, Ron?”

 

“Why did _he_ have to come? It's bad enough that weird girl is here and now _he's_ here.”

 

“If you mean Harry, then I would have thought it obvious. He and Ginny seem to have become friends.”

 

Ron snorted. “Because he's famous. Bloody hell, does no one understand? The oh so wonderful Boy Who Lived's dad was a Death Eater! How can everyone excuse that? Why are we socializing with that sort? Everyone already looks down at us for not having money. Isn't that enough?”

 

Bill and Charlie exchanged puzzled looks. Charlie asked, “Did you not read the interview that was published?”

 

“I read it. So what? Probably a bunch of lies to keep everyone liking Harry Potter. Percy thinks so, too.”

 

“Ron, everyone makes mistakes.” Ron snorted. “It's true. The professor _did_ spy for Professor Dumbledore. That should count for something.”

 

“Somehow I don't see choosing to follow an evil wizard as simple as a mistake. You don't mistakenly do something like that. You either mean it and believe it, or you don't. I bet he only turned spy to stay out of trouble. I bet, if You-Know-Who came back, the professor would be right there again, and this time, he would have the Boy Who Lived with him. You both have said, yourselves, how nasty and mean he was at school, the things he'd say. Does that sound like a good person to you?"

 

Bill, with the perspective of having been out of school and on his own for two years, put a hand on Ron's shoulder. “Sometimes things aren't so black and white. Sometimes, you have to look beyond the surface.”

 

“I can't believe you two are siding with him after the things he said and did. You two can make nice if you want, but I'm not going to. I think Seamus was right in saying that the professor should be watched carefully.”

 

Ron stalked off, hands in fists at his sides. Charlie turned to his brother. “I don't know about you, but I have the feeling today isn't going to go all that smoothly.”

 

“Probably not. Oh, here come Mrs. Potter and the professor with Mum and Dad.”

 

Charlie snickered. “I bet he gets a bit uncomfortable every time someone addresses her as Mrs. Potter. I mean, Harry is evidence that he and she … you know.” Charlie waggled his brows for emphasis.

 

Bill wrinkled his nose. “Eww! Charlie! How can you think like that?”

 

Charlie pulled an innocent expression. "What? Where do you think Harry came from? You can't think that either one of them is… inexperienced. And now that they're back together, they've probably been at it like rabbits. Ten years is a long dry spell. Then again, maybe Harry's presence has been a deterrent in that department."

 

Bill cringed. “Ugh, Charlie! Shut up!”

 

Charlie had no such inclination and seemed to genuinely enjoy winding his brother up. "Can you imagine going that long? Hey, maybe that's why Snape was so awful. After being with a girl, wanking just wasn't as satisfying. I imagine not even a good wank would measure up."

 

“That's even worse! I know very well where Harry came from, thank you very much. I just don't think about the professors that way. _Merlin, Charlie!_ ”

 

Charlie shrugged. "All I was saying was that it's obvious who Harry's father is just by looking at the kid, even from here. If it were me, I'd be wanting to yell to everyone that I had her first, that Harry was mine and that was how everyone should address them. Forget Potter." Charlie grinned, wagging his eyebrows again. "Maybe Snape will be more relaxed this year."

 

Bill smacked his brother. "Thanks, Mr. Maturity, for the visual I really didn't need. That's the last thing I want popping into my head as we're about to talk to them. But yeah, getting back to your original comment, it has to be a bit awkward for him. Knowing what we do now, I kind of feel bad for them." As the others drew closer, Bill whistled softly. "She's certainly a beautiful woman."

 

“That she is,” Charlie whispered, then straightened as his parents, Mrs. Potter, and the Potions professor joined them.

 

“Severus, I'm sure you remember our oldest boys. Bill finished Hogwarts two years ago and, of course, Charlie just finished.”

 

“Yes. William. Charles.” Severus gave them each a nod of recognition.

 

“Boys, this is Mrs. Potter.”

 

Bill caught his brother's eye and glared before smiling in the woman's direction. The visual he hadn't wanted had, indeed, popped into his brain. “Nice to meet you.”

“It's Lily, please. It's nice to meet the two of you.” The six of them took seats while Ginny, Luna, the twins, and even Ron, headed out to the clearing to toss around a makeshift Quaffle. “So, your parents tell me, Charlie, that you work with dragons? That's amazing. They're pretty and all, but I certainly wouldn't want to be around them all the time.”

 

Charlie laughed. “Yeah, not many people would.”

 

“Hagrid would,” Severus muttered. “A dragon would, no doubt, delight the man to the point of … insufferableness.”

 

Lily turned to him with an annoyed expression and smacked his arm. “Hush, you.”

 

Bill held back a grin at the raised eyebrow his former professor gave Lily. “You know I am not incorrect, Lily.”

 

“No, you're not, but be nice – difficult as that is for you.”

 

“Now, who is being impolite? And I do believe I _was_ being considerate. You would have known if I had been otherwise.”

 

Bill exchanged glances of shocked amusement with his family. He couldn't quite believe what he was hearing. Someone actually dared to call the professor on his sarcastic comments, and the professor didn't seem to mind. Bill studied the man sitting across from him and noticed the slight upturn of his lips. Instead of a smirk, it was a genuine smile. The callous, cold, bitter Potions professor was _joking_ with Lily! This was just too weird!

 

Discussion turned to Bill's job as a Curse Breaker for Gringotts and his work in Egypt with the pyramids. Even the professor participated in that conversation on occasion, seemingly interested in the Defensive Curses that Bill had encountered so far. Bill didn't get the impression the professor wanted to know for future reference, but more for academic reasons. To his surprise, when Snape contributed to the conversation, he had some fascinating insights on the possible constructions of the curses.

 

“Mum! Dad! Come quick!” Bill's little sister came running up, out of breath, looking frantic.

 

Molly took the girl by the shoulders and tried to calm her. “What is it, Ginny? What's wrong?”

 

Tears spilled down the girl's cheeks. “It's Harry. He fell. He's hurt.”

 

Only because he was watching his former professor, still pondering over what he'd learned about the man from speaking with him, did Bill see the man go entirely still at the mention of Harry. Upon hearing Harry had been hurt, the professor shot to his feet, his expression quite unreadable, and Bill thought this was the man who had played the role of spy.

 

“Miss Weasley, calm down and tell us what has happened.”

 

Oh, yes, Bill knew that tone of voice well. It was the one that said you'd best talk, or you wouldn't like the consequences. Lily's tight grip on the professor's arm was probably the only thing keeping the man from saying anything else. Or, judging by Lily's cautious expression, maybe _she_ was keeping the man calm, having been through injuries with Harry in the past. Bill tuned back into the moment in time to see Ginny collect herself and explain what happened.

 

“We were playing, tossing the ball around. Harry went to catch it, and Ron gave Harry a huge shove – with both hands. He did it on purpose. Trying to catch the ball, Harry wasn't really holding onto his broom and lost his balance. He landed on his side. I think he hit this rock sticking up out of the ground. He's having a hard time breathing.”

 

Everyone was on their feet in a second. “Take us.”

 

With them all running, it only took a couple of minutes before they reached the clearing where the Weasleys had always played Quidditch. Ron stood off to the side, not looking overly concerned. The twins knelt over a crumpled form lying on its left side. Bill hung back just a little and observed, knowing his place was to stay out of it. As he watched, both the professor and Lily knelt beside Harry.

 

Lily brushed the hair from Harry's face. “Sweetheart talk to us. Where does it hurt?”

 

“Side," Harry gasped.

 

“Harry, your mother and I will turn you over to make it easier for me to check for serious injuries. Understood?”

 

“Okay, Dad.”

 

“Lils, get his feet. I will turn him over from this position. Ready? Now. Carefully.”

 

Bill didn't think he'd ever seen the potions professor be so gentle. As he watched, the professor lifted Harry's shirttail to get a view of the boy's ribs, then to lightly feel along the already darkening skin. Bill supposed it made sense the man would be quite familiar with injuries and how to heal them. To the Curse Breaker's astonishment, the professor removed a hair tie from his pocket and proceeded to pull the sides of his hair back out of his face. Taking his wand from his sleeve – Bill had wondered if it was there – the man waved it over Harry's ribs, nonverbally casting his spells. It was enlightening seeing the former spy in action.

 

“How is he?”

 

The professor looked up at Lily after a moment. “A pair of cracked ribs. The breath knocked out of him. Nothing overly serious. His ribs have been healed. Molly, may we impose upon you for some bruise paste?”

 

“Oh! Absolutely! I'm so sorry this happened!”

 

Lily, now looking relieved, waved away Molly's concern just as the woman sent one of the twins for the product. “It's alright.” Though relieved, Lily did seem to want to hover over her son. “Harry, did you hit your head?”

 

“There is no indication of damage. Obviously, a well-armored skull is as much a matrilineal gift as it is a patrilineal one.”

 

Confused, Bill couldn't figure how that answered Lily's question until Lily gasped and narrowed her eyes. “Are you saying I have a hard head, Severus Snape? _Me?_ ”

 

Harry snickered from his position still on the ground. Bill caught the amusement in the professor's gaze and the twitch of the man's lips when he glanced at Harry before returning his attention to Lily with a raised eyebrow, not bothering to respond verbally.

 

“I'll have you know you have the hardest head of anyone I've ever known, and Harry is just like you. It's no surprise there's no head wound; it's too hard to injure.” With that, Lily stalked away.

 

Bill nearly laughed when Harry copied Snape's eyebrow lift. “Isn't that basically what you just said? I know you did that on purpose so she wouldn't worry over me all day.”

 

“It is. My tactic was successful, was it not?”

 

“Maybe so, but you know you'll pay for it later. Mum can be pretty vocal when her temper's up.”

 

Bill watched, fascinated at seeing this side of his former professor. The man smirked and rather drolly replied, “I do believe I will survive. Now, up you get. Easy.”

 

Professor Snape helped ease Harry to a sitting position, kneeling behind him so Harry could lean against him. Inwardly, Bill shook his head. Why his brothers couldn't see the affection the man had for both Lily and Harry was beyond him. It was quite obvious he had changed for the better. Bill hoped things eased up on the three of them. If anyone deserved some peace, it was them. After what he'd just witnessed, he felt even better about Ginny befriending Harry. Once Fred returned with the bruise paste, Bill ignored his mother haranguing Ron and watched as the professor spread the thick ointment over Harry's side with an extremely gentle touch. Assured Harry would be fine, the elder Weasleys decided it was a good time for presents.

 

Professor Snape placed one hand on Harry's shoulder as they walked toward the back garden, the other hand pulling his hair free and pocketing the hair tie. Bill nodded for Charlie to join him. “We need to try to change Ron and Percy's opinions. Professor Snape is different now. There could be trouble if those two continue on the way they are. Maybe not from Percy since he's a Prefect, but definitely from Ron.”

 

Charlie nodded. "Especially if Harry gets Sorted into Slytherin, which is a real possibility." Smirking, Charlie added, "I guess Harry hasn't been as much of a deterrent after all."

 

Bill smacked his brother and shook his head in disgust.

 

SSLE

 

Harry sat at the table beside Ginny, enjoying watching her open her presents. He thought she'd like what he and his mum found for her. From her parents, she received some new clothes and a couple of books. By Ginny's delighted grin, Harry had the impression that she didn't get brand new clothes very often. From her twin brothers, she received a few joke products and a few fireworks. From her Prefect brother, Percy, she received some parchment and a fancy quill and ink set. She squealed excitedly, jumping up and down, at getting a signed Harpies poster, both of her oldest brothers having gone together to get it.

 

When it came to Ron's gift, Ginny skipped it, stating she was too angry with her brother to open whatever he had given her. Harry's hand skimmed up to his somewhat tender left side at the thought of Ron Weasley. Currently, the boy was sitting down at the other end of the table with Mr. and Mrs. Weasley and Harry's parents. _We don't associate with Death Eaters!_ Apparently, no one heard Ron say that just as the boy had shoved Harry off his broom. Harry supposed Ginny's brother was afraid that Harry's dad would go back to doing bad stuff if You-Know-Who ever came back. A lot of people were according to the letters Harry knew his mum and dad still received. The only consolation Harry had at the moment was seeing Ron down there by his dad and knowing Ron would be starting school this year and seeing his dad in class. The thought almost brought a grin to Harry's face.

 

Ginny pulled the gift from Harry to her and remarked about its weight, staring at Harry, who merely shrugged and told her to open it. The instant she finished unwrapping it, Harry found himself engulfed in a massive hug for a moment. Letting him go, she grabbed the two items and rushed down to her parents.

 

“Look! An encyclopedia of different horse breeds! And look at the picture! They're Friesians! Aren't they pretty, with those long manes and muscular bodies? So graceful!”

 

“Yes, they are beautiful." Mrs. Weasley picked up the book and flipped through it. "The photos move! This must be a Wizarding book, but I don't remember seeing anything like it before at the bookshop."

 

“Well, it's not technically a Wizarding book." Lily looked at the three Weasleys somewhat sheepishly. "It's a Muggle book that Harry found and thought Ginny would like. I shouldn't have done it, but I Charmed the photos to move – only when in the hands of someone magical. If a Muggle were to pick it up, they'd see regular photographs." Lily winced as she turned to Mr. Weasley. "I'm sorry if that puts you in a difficult position since you work at the Ministry. I can remove the Charm."

 

Mr. Weasley smiled and winked. “What Charm?”

 

“Thank you very much, Mrs. Potter. You didn't have to get me anything, but I love the book and the picture.”

 

“You're very welcome. Call me Lily, will you? I'm sure we'll be seeing and talking to each other quite often.”

 

“Thanks, again.”

 

Ginny returned to her spot at the table, gave Harry another hug of thanks, and began clearing away the wrapping paper. Cake and ice cream came next. The size of the chocolate-frosted cake had Harry's chin dropping. The horse-shaped cake gently landed on the table in front of Ginny. Ten candles followed the cake horse's neck and body. Once they were lit, a hasty rendition of the birthday song was sung before Ginny blew out the candles. One of them re-lit. After blowing it out three times and having it light again each time, Ginny stared at her twin brothers.

 

“Which of you did it? Which of you put trick candles on my cake?”

 

The twins pointed at each other, simultaneously saying, “He did it.”

 

“I can take care of it, but it'll require licking my fingers to do it.” Ginny looked at him a moment before nodding.

 

Luna came out of her dream world to say, “I don't think you'll be concerned with Harry's spit in a few years, so it shouldn't matter now.”

 

Not sure how to respond to that or what to even make of the girl's statement, Harry lightly licked his thumb and forefinger and pinched the flame out. Much to the guests' humor, Ginny proclaimed she would get a part of the horse's head and that Ron was to get the horse's backside. While Mrs. Weasley scolded her daughter, Harry snorted at Ginny's complete lack of remorse for her comment. The combination of sweet cake and cold ice cream made a perfect ending to a mostly-perfect day, in Harry's opinion.

 

As they prepared to leave, Harry promised he would write to Ginny before the school year started. Luna made another of her odd comments, which made Ginny giggle. Harry felt maybe she laughed at his complete inability to figure out the blonde girl, but he didn't take offense. He knew Ginny would never mean to be cruel to him. It still amazed him how quickly the two of them had become friends. It had been so easy, really. Much easier than he had anticipated. Ginny didn't see him as a celebrity but saw him as he indeed was. The blonde, Luna, didn't seem phased by his well-known scar, either. Just maybe, odd though she was, she could be a friend, too.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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	4. Out With the Old

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Since I've nearly finished chapter 9, I thought I'd post this one. Thanks for the warm reception. I've not written Sevily (Snily) before, so to have this story be so well-received just blows my mind. Thank you all!

_**Every new beginning comes from some other beginning's end.** _

– _**Seneca**_

 

A week before the start of the school year found Harry anxiously standing at Hogwarts' main gate with his mum as he waited for Ginny. He had asked Dumbledore to grant her special permission to come for a visit, all but pleadingly stating it would be the last time he'd see her before Christmas, and that he wanted to show off Hogwarts to her. The instant Dumbledore had agreed, Harry had thanked him, rushed out of the man's office, stopping long enough to pull out a quill and parchment to hastily write Ginny a note, and sprinted to the Owlery to send it with one of the school owls. As he waited for their arrival, Harry took to pacing in small circles.

 

“I know you're excited to see her, sweetheart, but calm down. She'll be here soon.”

 

Harry glared at his mum for the amusement he heard in her voice, not realizing his expression reinforced his resemblance to his dad, right down to his tightly pressed lips, which only made his mum continue grinning. Rolling his eyes, Harry returned to his pacing, but let out a pleased whoop when the crack of Apparition echoed around them.

 

He laughed at Ginny's amazed exclamation as his mum unlocked the gate. “Fantastic, isn't it?”

 

“It's spectacular!”

 

“Wait until you see the inside! Can we go, Mum?”

 

Lily waved them on with a laugh, but Molly called to her daughter. “Behave now, Ginny. Professor Dumbledore was very kind to let you stay for a little while today.”

 

“I know, Mum. I will. I promise.” Before her mother could say anything more, Ginny took off running to the main doors, yelling back at Harry. “What are you waiting for? An engraved invitation?”

 

Harry tore off after the youngest Weasley. Though she had a head start, they reached the main door simultaneously. Their first stop was to peek into the Great Hall to see the enchanted ceiling.

 

“Ohhh! It's just like Bill, Charlie, and the twins said it was! It's amazing! Oh, I can't wait until I get to see it every day.”

 

“Yeah, it's nice to be able to look up and see what it's like outside without actually going outside. The evenings are the best, though, because that's when it shows all the stars in the sky. When I was little, there were times Mum and I would eat under the stars. It was peaceful in a way.” Harry shrugged, embarrassed to have shared something so personal. “Anyway, come on, I'll show you where all the classrooms are. Wait, maybe we should make you a map so that when you do come next year, you won't be lost.”

 

“Good idea!”

 

“Come on. We'll get some parchment and a quill.”

 

Harry led Ginny down into the dungeons, through the twisting corridors, chuckling at her comment about being lost. “Mum said the same thing when we first came down here. Dad added us to a spell he cast on the walls that pointed out the directions to different places. He said he came up with the spell for Slytherin first-years who kept getting lost, said he got tired of having to tell them how to get around.”

 

“Your dad created a spell? That's amazing! It's supposed to be really difficult to do that.”

 

Pride swelled in Harry's chest and he looked over at his friend, beaming. “He's created lots of spells over the years, some of which he invented while still in school. He told me about one of them, a privacy kind of charm that makes people hear only buzzing if they're outside the protective circle. He wouldn't tell me how to cast it, though.”

 

“That's too bad, but I guess it's not surprising.”

 

“Nah, not really. Here we are.” Harry opened the door that led to the rooms he considered home, stepped through and held the door for Ginny, who hung back, looking extremely uncertain. “What's wrong?”

 

“I, er, probably shouldn't go in there. I don't think your dad would be very appreciative of finding me in there. I mean, those are his private rooms.”

 

Rolling his eyes, Harry grabbed Ginny's wrist and pulled her inside. “It's fine. Come on. We'll only be a minute.”

 

Harry, his back to the room as he closed the door, jumped when Ginny let out a little squeak, stammering, “Oh, er, h-hello, P-Professor. Er, Harry wanted to, er, get some parchment and quill to make me a map of the castle. I told him I should wait outside.”

 

Turning, Harry saw his dad standing in the doorway to his lab, hair partially pulled back the way he always wore when brewing, sleeves rolled to his elbows, wiping his stained hands on a cloth. The fact that his dad hadn't kept his left arm covered wasn't lost on Harry. His dad didn't go out of his way to show it off, nor, lately, did he keep it hidden the way he used to while working in the lab. When he'd first noticed this tendency, Harry hadn't been able to keep his eyes from the Mark. Even now, his gaze briefly strayed to it before he forced his eyes to his dad's face.

 

“Oh, hi, Dad. I thought Ginny might find it helpful if she had a map of the school, like where all the classrooms are so that when she came next year she'd already know where everything was.”

 

Harry's dad gave them a single nod, one corner of his mouth curled upward in approval. “Taking advantage of an opportunity given. Always a good thing.” His dark gaze landed on Ginny. “Miss Weasley, whenever Harry invites you inside, you are welcome.”

 

“Thank you, sir.”

 

“Enjoy your day. Harry, it may be prudent to include your mother's room on your map in case Miss Weasley is interested in taking Muggle Studies in the future.”

 

“Alright. Is Mum there?”

 

“She is.”

 

“Alright. Thanks, Dad.”

 

As his dad returned to his work, Harry motioned for Ginny to follow him as he went to his room to grab a few sheets of parchment and a quill.

 

“You have a nice room, Harry.”

 

“Thanks. Do you want to draw it out as we go or do it here?” When she didn't answer right away, Harry looked up to find her lost in thought. “What's wrong?” Ginny indicated nothing was wrong, but Harry could tell something bothered her. “I know something's wrong. Please talk to me.”

 

“Alright, but not until we leave, okay?”

 

After gathering what he thought he would need, Harry led Ginny back out the main door, not calling out to his dad, since he was busy brewing. Thinking the Potions classroom was a good place for a talk, Harry headed in that direction. Stepping through the open door, he settled at one of the back tables. Deciding Ginny would bring up what bothered her, Harry started on his map of Hogwarts, mapping the path from the Entrance Hall to the classroom they now sat inside. With a moment's hesitation, he added the corridor that contained the entrance to the Slytherin common room. Harry didn't know exactly where the entrance was, but he had managed to convince his dad to at least show him the corridor.

 

“I saw it.” Ginny's quiet statement had Harry looking up at her, but he remained silent. “I saw the Dark Mark on his arm. I'm kind of surprised he wasn't hiding it.”

 

Putting down the quill, Harry studied his friend, trying to gauge her reaction to what she saw. “He's more comfortable with it, though not by much. I think it was something Mum said, but I don't know what it might have been. Don't get me wrong, he still hates that it's there, but, as you saw, when in private, he hasn't been keeping it covered quite so much. I know, when working, he's more comfortable with his sleeves out of the way and his hair kept out of his eyes, which I can't blame him for it.”

 

“No, I don't either. Listening to my brothers talk, brewing potions is an unforgiving craft; everything has to be exact, so being comfortable is important. I guess I just wasn't expecting to see, well, it. I've heard about it, how it looks, but have never actually seen it.”

 

“And now that you have?” Harry nearly held his breath, pulse pounding. He had the feeling this was a test, of sorts, of their friendship.

 

Ginny shrugged, idly tracing scratches in the table's surface. “I don't know. I guess it reminded me of the interview that the three of you had published, of everything that has happened, and it made me a bit sad that all of you had to go through all of that. While everyone celebrated the disappearance of You-Know-Who, you had your family ripped apart. While I had my mum and dad, you didn't know your dad, and he didn't know about you. You had your mum, but it's not the same, really. I, er, think your dad noticed me looking at it. I didn't really mean to look. I hope he doesn't think I was judging him or anything.”

 

“He probably did notice, but don't worry about it. I've seen it, and it still draws my attention. I think Mum is hoping Dad will become comfortable enough around certain people not to feel the need to hide it. That will probably take a while, though.”

 

“Probably.”

 

Harry fingered the parchment on which he'd begun drawing his map. “I'm glad seeing it didn't change your mind about him or about me.”

 

Ginny's brow furrowed as she looked at him. “Why would it?”

 

“I don't know. I guess actually seeing it could remind people of the things he did years ago. I'm not stupid enough to believe that all those bad feelings from then have disappeared. I mean, the letters my mum and dad have received are proof that they haven't. Ten years isn't that long, really.”

 

“Harry! Don't you dare start apologizing for the idiotic things people have said!”

 

“I'm not. Those people make me so mad. I'd love to write to them and tell them to keep their noses out of our business, to say that, apparently, _their_ parents weren't as great as they seem to think since they think it's okay to judge and say nasty things about people they don't even know.”

 

“You mean like _If you don't have something nice to say, don't say anything at all_?”

 

“Exactly. I've thought about writing to The Daily Prophet, too, but I don't think Mum or Dad would like that. It would probably just keep things going, you know?”

 

“Well, I think you should. _Someone_ should tell these people off.”

 

“Maybe I will if it doesn't quit soon.” Harry finished mapping out the dungeon. He pointed to the square marked as Potions Lab. “Okay, we're here.” He trailed his finger along as he mentioned the different areas. “Down this corridor and turn left takes you to the Slytherin common room. Well, it's there somewhere. Dad refused to say where. This is the path we took from our rooms. To get to the dungeon stairs, you go this way.”

 

“Thank Merlin you're doing this for me. I'd have been so lost.”

 

“Now you won't be. Come on. Let's head upstairs.”

 

The only thing on the ground floor that Ginny had yet to see was the Transfiguration classroom so he took her there, pointing out that it could also be accessed by the middle courtyard. After adding the ground floor to his map, the two of them continued on to the first floor. Harry popped his head into the hospital wing, didn't see Madam Pomfrey, and motioned for Ginny to take a look, stating the matron's office was just on the other side of the expansive room.

 

From there, the two stopped by the History of Magic room, the library, and then the Muggle Studies room. Curious as to how his mum had decorated, Harry stepped in and saw her putting up some posters using a type of putty he'd seen in lots of Muggle stores. Around the room, other posters containing various wildlife had already been placed, as well as humorous inspirational posters. At the front of the room, Harry noticed a light bulb and some batteries of differing sizes.

 

“Hello, you two. Taking a tour?”

 

“Harry's making me a map so I'll know where all the classrooms are located.”

 

“Oh. Well, that's an excellent idea.”

 

Harry handed Ginny the first completed sheet of parchment and began working on a new sheet, drawing out the places they'd visited on that floor. “I know how confused I was while wandering the castle. I didn't want Ginny to feel the same way. Besides, this way, if I mention something like how much longer it took than I thought to get from one classroom to another, she could understand, seeing the rooms on the map.”

 

To Harry's utter embarrassment, his mother walked over to him, mussed his hair and kissed him on the head. “That's incredibly sweet of you.”

 

“Mum!” From behind him, Ginny snickered. “Hush, you.”

 

Ginny merely ignored him. “What Muggle things will you be teaching, Lily?”

 

“Third-years will learn about electricity, how it's used, created, and stored. After that, basic information like money, transportation, entertainment, clothing. The later years we'll go more in-depth to each of those things, maybe even have some field trips. Are you interested in taking my class your third year?”

 

“Maybe. My dad really loves Muggle things. He has a whole shed of stuff. He likes taking things apart and trying to figure out how they work.”

 

“Ah. Well, it's too bad he couldn't sit in on my class. I'll just have to send him some of the handouts I have – on Muggle paper, naturally – that I plan to give to my students. All of my students' work will be done on Muggle paper and with biros.”

 

“Is the paper that much different?”

 

“It's much thinner than the parchment we use. Here, let me show you.” Strolling to the desk at the front of the room, Lily pulled out a sheet of lined notebook paper. “This is what Muggles use.”

 

Ginny took the paper in hand, eyeing it. “Wow, it's so much lighter.” Holding it up to the sunlight streaming in through one of the windows, she gasped. “You can almost see through it! How does the ink not go right through it?”

 

As Lily held out a biro she'd taken from her desk, Harry answered for her. “The ink is thinner than ours so it's not as heavy. Use the biro and you'll see.”

 

Ginny took the writing implement and wrote her name on the paper. “This is brilliant! It writes so smoothly! Not to mention it's a lot less messy. I almost wish we used these instead of ink and quill.”

 

“Maybe one day we will.”

 

After bidding his mum goodbye, the pair found the other classrooms, Harry mentioning the Gryffindor common room entrance being on the seventh floor. “Mum wouldn't tell me where it was, either. There must be some rule or something that says they can't say unless you're actually in the House. It's the only thing that makes sense, considering Dad wouldn't tell me more than the corridor the entrance to Slytherin was in.”

 

“Maybe it's to keep others out, those who aren't in the House. It's too bad there's no mingling of the Houses. I mean, what if I was Sorted into Gryffindor like all my family has been, and you were Sorted into another House? We wouldn't see each other very much.”

 

Harry slowed to a stop as her words made him worry. “Ginny, what if you end up in Gryffindor, like you said, but I go to my dad's House? What would that mean for us as friends? From what little I've heard from Mum, generally speaking, Gryffindors don't like Slytherins and vice versa.”

 

“It won't matter what House you go to. If you get Slytherin, so what? We'll just have to change the so-called rules, won't we?”

 

“Your parents and brothers wouldn't care if you were friends with a Slytherin?”

 

Here, Ginny hesitated for a fraction of a second. “Ron and Percy might, but that's just because they're being gits. The rest of my family wouldn't.”

 

“How can you be so sure?”

 

“Because I know them. They've accepted you for who you are as a person, just as they have accepted your dad, regardless of his past. Trust me. They won't care. I've heard that the Sorting Hat also asks what House you want. Have you given it any thought?”

 

“Yeah. I keep going back and forth. Mum was in Gryffindor, so it would be nice to be in the same House, and I want to make her proud of me. On the other hand, Dad would probably like for me to be in his House, and I'd like that too. I want him to be proud of me and to be able to say his son was in his House.” Harry shook his head, a little frustrated but mostly melancholic. “I don't know which one I'd rather have. If it came down to me to choose, I don't think I could.”

 

Ginny nodded sympathetically. “It would be like having to choose between your parents.”

 

“Exactly.”

 

“I'm sorry, Harry. I didn't mean to upset you.”

 

“No, it's okay. It was nice being able to talk about it with you. I talked about it a little with Mum, but she gave me the standard answer of _Of course he wouldn't mind if you were in Gryffindor._ Aren't parents supposed to say that? I'm sure Dad would say the same if I asked him.” Ginny conceded the point with a nod. “Come on, it's probably close to lunchtime. Maybe afterward, we can fly a little.”

 

“Alright.”

 

During lunch, Harry noticed a few amused glances sent his and Ginny's way by Madam Pomfrey, Professor McGonagall, and Professor Sprout. He couldn't figure out what it was about him and Ginny that was so funny to them. Neither of them were dressed oddly. They didn't have anything weird on their clothes, so, why were the professors laughing about them?

 

“Could we be seeing history repeat itself?”

 

Professor McGonagall's question to Madam Pomfrey was quiet but Harry heard it. So did his dad, apparently, because he choked on his lunch. The three witches huddled together, murmuring – this time quietly enough to not be heard. Harry looked to his mum for some clarification as to what was meant by Professor McGonagall's question, but she was busy helping his dad, though she was grinning. Ginny's response to Harry's questioning gaze was a shrug of her shoulders.

 

Once finished with the noon meal, Professor McGonagall unlocked the broom shed for them, staying at the pitch with his mum to watch them fly. Harry didn't mind; he figured it was the only way Ginny would have been allowed. While they didn't perform any actual stunts – like steep dives or the Sloth Grip Roll – they did race the length of the pitch repeatedly, playing a game of Follow the Leader. In this, Harry was able to teach her a few things she hadn't been able to attempt.

 

A couple hours later, they were called down from the air; Ginny's mum would be collecting her soon. That, naturally, put a damper on their moods, knowing they wouldn't be seeing each other again until Christmas.

 

“Miss Weasley, I look forward to seeing you on my Quidditch team one day. If you are in my House, that is.”

 

“Thanks, Professor. I'd like that. I like playing Chaser, though, and from what Fred and George have said, I wouldn't have a chance at that for several years.”

 

“Perhaps not, but having you practice against the girls would be good for you and for them.”

 

Ginny's eyes rounded. “You mean it? You'd let me practice with them?”

 

“With talent like that, of course I would.”

 

Harry listened to the conversation wistfully. It sounded as if it was a foregone conclusion that Ginny would be placed in Gryffindor, and if what she said about her family was true, she would be. So, where did that leave him? What if he picked Gryffindor, and then, when she came the following year, she was Sorted elsewhere? Was wanting to be in the same House as a friend reason enough to choose that House? Harry didn't think so but wasn't certain. All he knew was that just the thought of the Sorting made his stomach sour.

 

“You're awfully quiet.” Lily observed as they walked toward the main gate.

 

Harry looked up at his mum, trying not to show his feelings on the Sorting Ceremony. “Just sad to have to say goodbye to Ginny. I won't see her again until Christmas.”

 

Both Ginny and his mum gave him looks that said they knew his thoughts weren't centered on that, at least not fully, but neither did they comment. Before long, Mrs. Weasley appeared. Harry thanked her for letting Ginny come, gave his friend a hug, then mother and daughter disappeared. He remained silent on the way back into the castle despite efforts to draw him into conversation. Claiming to be tired, Harry went down to his room to lie down, his mind still trying to decide which House he wanted.

 

SSLE

 

For the third evening in a row, Severus watched Harry pick at his food, only taking a bite occasionally. Initially, he had suspected Harry's demeanor to be due to not seeing Miss Weasley for a few months, but the closer the school year approached – tomorrow was the first of September – the more withdrawn Harry had become. He and Lily had discussed it that first night, but she had thought to let it be for the moment. Things had only deteriorated since then. Harry claimed to not be hungry and had taken to napping in the afternoons. Perhaps the boy was ill, which would be unfortunate timing. Catching Lily's eye, he indicated Harry with a slight nod in that direction. When she acknowledged his meaning, Severus focused on his meal.

 

Back in their quarters, Harry yawned, declaring he was getting a shower and going to bed. Sitting on the sofa in their customary position after Harry had retired, Lily chewed her lip. “Do you think we should let him get on the train tomorrow? He's obviously not feeling well. What if he gets sick, really sick?”

 

“I will talk to the witch with the food trolley. I am certain she would check on him occasionally. Unless he is truly ill, I believe the train ride will be good for him. Nothing against Miss Weasley, but Harry will need friends this year, and the train ride provides the perfect opportunity for that.”

 

“True. You know better than I do how cruel kids can be, though. I just hope they treat him fairly.”

 

Yes, Severus knew exactly how cruel kids could be and fervently hoped his son didn't suffer the same fate. Kissing the crown of Lily's head, Severus tried to project an air calm assurance. “Everything will turn out as it should be.”

 

Lily grazed her lips against the underside of his jaw. “Sorry, Sev, but that's not as reassuring as you think it is.”

 

Severus knew it wasn't what Lily had wanted to hear, but it was the best he could do. He could not bear to burden her with his fears that Harry would, indeed, suffer at the hands of his peers. Being the Boy Who Lived would have been reason enough for certain individuals in the school. Being the Boy Who Lived _and_ the son of a former Death Eater multiplied the number of people who could have something against him. The past nine years had shown Severus just how the children of Death Eaters were treated by the Houses, and he feared Harry was headed for that exact same treatment.

 

Deciding to call it an early night, they retired to bed. A few hours later, Severus instantly awakened, though not sure why he had. He'd always been a light sleeper, but he hadn't startled awake in years. Wanting to investigate, he disentangled himself from Lily, who stirred until he convinced her to go back to sleep. Donning a pair of sleep pants and a t-shirt, Severus grabbed his wand and crept from the bedroom. No unusual sounds came from is quarters. Wait. There was something very faint. Severus bypassed the open door of the loo. Reaching Harry's bedroom door, he heard a sound he was all too familiar with – the muffled sound of desperate tears.

 

Bothered by the fact his son felt the need to hide his tears from them, Severus stepped into Harry's room. “Harry? What has upset you?”

 

Severus could imagine the frantic movements that accompanied the sounds that followed his inquiry. A startled jerk. Quick swipes at his face to remove any and all wetness. A clearing of his throat. Severus could easily imagine it because he'd lived it.

 

“N-nothing, Dad. Just a bad dream.”

 

Not accepting that response as truth, Severus closed in on Harry's bed and drew the curtains back. Taking the liberty to sit on Harry's bed, Severus set is wand on the bedside table. “I do not believe a mere nightmare has brought this on. Harry, is something worrying you?”

 

Severus knew a moment of panic when Harry actually burst into tears. What now? Maybe he should get Lily; she would know what to do. No, he could handle this. He had to figure out this fatherhood thing and couldn't rely on Lily to solve everything.

 

“What is it, Harry? What has you this upset?”

 

“The Sorting. What if I'm put in Gryffindor?”

 

“Then … they would be lucky to have you. Would being in Gryffindor be so terrible? It was your mother's House.”

 

“I know, and it wouldn't be bad, really. You wouldn't be upset if that's where I ended up?”

 

“I would not. As I stated, it was your mother's House. You have, at minimum, a twenty-five percent chance of being there.”

 

“But you're _supposed_ to say that.”

 

“In this instance, I mean precisely what I say.”

 

“Well, what if I go to Slytherin? Would Mum be upset?”

 

“I would be proud to have you in my House, Harry. Do not doubt that. Neither your mother nor I care which House you are Sorted into.”

 

“What if I have to choose between them? It would be like choosing between you and Mum. I don't want to have to choose. It's all I've been thinking about the last three days, and now, my stomach hurts.”

 

“There is no need to make yourself ill. You should have come to us with your concerns. Why did you not?”

 

Harry shrugged. “I just didn't want to bother Mum. She's always had so much to do, to worry about.”

 

What Harry didn't say spoke volumes, and Severus found it troubled him greatly. He had thought he had been doing well, but in reality, it appeared he had not. “I can only assume you did not come to me because you felt I could not be approached. For that, I am truly sorry. I never intended to give you that impression. I am not accustomed to allowing my thoughts or feelings be known. Your mother is different as she is quite familiar with my nature. With her, I often do not need to explain myself. It is … different … with you. It has been an adjustment. I fear I have not adjusted as well as I had hoped.”

 

“No, it's okay. It's been a big change for me, too. Really, you have been okay. I guess it'll just take time for the both of us.”

 

“Indeed. As for your stomach, I have something that can help.”

 

Without another word, Severus left Harry's room and walked into the sitting room where his potions cupboard stood. Measuring out a child-sized dose of two potions, Severus retrieved a glass of water and returned to his son.

 

“Take this first. It will settle your stomach.” Once Harry had taken that one, Severus held out the next vial. “This will help you to get the sleep you need.” Lastly, Severus gave Harry the glass of water. “Merely water.” When Harry had taken as much water as he wanted, Severus took the glass back. “It is a big day for you tomorrow. Best to rest as much as possible.”

 

Harry yawned. “Okay, Dad. Thanks.”

 

“No need to thank me, Harry. I want to help you. I simply need to know that you require it.”

 

As Harry settled under his duvet, a thought popped into Severus' mind, and before he could think twice about acting on it, he leaned down to place a light kiss on his son's forehead. He lingered at his son's side until Harry fell asleep once more. Leaving the room, guilt squeezed his chest, forcing him to lean against the wall to catch his breath. Obviously, his son had been agonizing over the Sorting Ceremony and he had had no idea the situation had been that extreme. Yes, he had known something had been affecting his son, but had he bothered to discover precisely what? No, he had not.

 

Running a hand over his face, Severus turned away from the bedrooms, no longer able to sleep and headed for the one place that always took his mind off his problems: the lab. Going to one of his shelves, he pulled out a book that contained some of the most complicated potions available. Opening to a random page, Severus checked the ingredient list against his stores, prepared what he needed and began.

 

Hours later, he finished the potion and began the process of bottling. He could easily sell it to an apothecary for a nice amount of gold. Doing his best to write legibly, he labeled the bottles, then, set out to clean his equipment. With everything put back into its place, Severus turned toward the door and actually startled. Lily stood there, arms folded contemplatively over her chest, her incredibly green eyes following his every move.

 

“What's going on, Sev? I vaguely remember you getting up, but you never came back to bed. You never brew during the night unless you have something on your mind.”

 

Severus briefly debated with himself whether to divulge what he had learned. Checking the time, he saw that he had been up for six and a half hours. Exhaling deeply through his nose, he pulled out a stool, patting it for Lily to join him. Leaning his elbows on the table surface in front of him, he took a moment to gather his thoughts.

 

“What is it?” Lily lightly ran a hand along his arm.

 

“Yes, I did awaken last night – in a manner which I have not in a very long time. When I investigated, I discovered what it was that had not felt quite right.” Severus found it nearly impossible to get the words past his lips, having to force them out, one or two at a time. “Lils, Harry was … upset … and was … hiding it. He has been … worrying … over the Sorting Ceremony.”

 

“What? The Sorting? But why?”

 

“Why do you think? He has been afraid of disappointing one of us in regards to his House placement. He seemed to be under the impression that a Sorting into Gryffindor would negatively affect how I view him. To him, a Sorting into Slytherin would be disloyal to you.”

 

Lily sat on her stool, green eyes filling with tears, as she stared at him. “Oh, no. Oh, poor Harry.” She buried her face in her hands. “I wish I had known. I just thought it was because he was going to miss Ginny.”

 

Severus fiddled with the bottles of potion, anger at himself for not seeing the obvious pooling in his stomach and threatening to explode. “I failed to correctly interpret his behavior as well.” He swirled the bottles on the tabletop almost violently until Lily took them out of his grasp. Pushing from the table, he paced, in desperate need to burn off the energy his temper provided. “He considers me unapproachable, Lily. How could I have failed so completely? I have prided myself on detecting a person's motives behind their actions. How is it that I could not see my own son's?”

 

Severus only stopped pacing when Lily stepped in front of him, her hands on his shoulders. “You haven't failed, Sev.”

 

Severus' dark gaze bore into hers, not accepting her protest, entire body tense. “Unapproachable, Lily. He did not deny it. How else am I to take that but as a a failure? Not once did I attempt to discover what it was that had him so unsettled.”

 

“He didn't come to me, either, Severus. Besides, whose instincts woke them up, telling them something wasn't right? Who was it who made our son feel comforted enough to sleep? Because it surely wasn't me.”

 

Not willing to accept credit for that, he argued, “Potions helped him sleep.”

 

“I'm sure just you being there and asking helped more than you know.” Lily wrapped her arms around his waist. “He's always been like that, thinking he has to protect me or my feelings, keeping his own to himself. A lot like his father in that, too.”

 

Sighing, Severus enfolded Lily in his arms, resting his cheek against the top of her head, allowing his eyes to close. “As I recall, you had your share of protective moments when we were young.”

 

Lily laughed softly. “Yes, I suppose I did.”

 

“What can be done for Harry? How do I change his perception of me and my expectations? He did not believe I was sincere when I informed him his House placement mattered not to either of us.”

 

“Just keep doing what you're doing. Harry's smart; he'll see that you're sincere. Now, with school beginning, it may take a little longer. Unless, of course, he does go to Slytherin. Then, you'd have a reason to see him outside of class.”

 

Pulling slightly out of their embrace, Severus frowned down at Lily. “I need no reason to see my son.”

 

Lily smiled, easing the crease in his forehead. “No, but you also don't want to give the appearance of favoritism. I have a feeling Harry will have a hard enough time these first few days without the perception of special treatment added to it.”

 

“That, too, is my fear.”

 

“This will be new territory for everyone involved. We'll just do the best we can. Now, you look exhausted. It's still early. Why don't you lie down? I'll wake you later.”

 

Feeling as tired as he apparently looked, Severus nodded his acquiescence to Lily's suggestion. The absolute concentration needed for brewing that potion had taken its own toll on him, leaving him feeling utterly spent, which, ultimately, had been the effect he had desired. Now, he felt as if he could rest. Suppressing a yawn, Severus kissed Lily's cheek, picked up his wand, and returned to their bed. After stowing his wand under his pillow – a habit he had developed at the height of the war and had never broken – he lay down, more at peace than when he had awakened.

 

SSLE

 

“I hope we didn't miss the Weasleys. I wanted to see Ginny one last time.”

 

Severus exchanged an amused glance with Lily before she responded. “Molly told me the other day that they tend to run rather late, so I doubt that they've arrived yet.”

 

“Oh, good. If it wasn't for Ginny, I would have begged you to let me skip the train ride.”

 

Severus glared at all of the nosy people, who were busy whispering and staring in their direction. He had expected attention would be on the three of them despite having done the interview, but he had not thought it would be to this extent – and he would be leaving Harry with them. The notion did not sit well with him, but he could not show any bias towards his son. The irony of that was not lost on Severus; however, he wanted to start anew. This year, he actually desired to teach his craft to the students. Naturally, he would not allow any nonsense in his classroom. It was too dangerous to do otherwise. The change would come when he would no longer show his House any partiality over the others, which meant a certain few were in for a very rude awakening.

 

“The train ride is important. Maybe you'll make some friends.”

 

From the glances Harry threw at the people around them, Severus could see that Harry doubted Lily's optimistic statement. He, himself, doubted it, but hoped she was correct. At least the media had been forbidden from entering onto the platform. This was difficult enough without those vultures attempting to pick apart whatever was left to be had of their story.

 

“Harry, it is important you follow through with these rituals. It would not do to make any exceptions for you. You are already aware of how it must be in class.”

 

“I know. I would have begged, but I wouldn't have expected you to allow me to skip it.”

 

“Why don't you go put your bag in one of the compartments? You have your uniform, a book to pass the time, and your money, right?”

 

Harry rolled his eyes at his mother's fussing. “Yes, Mum.” He patted his bag. “It's all in here. I'll be back in a minute.”

 

“Hello, again, Severus.”

 

Severus tensed at the silky greeting. Immediately going on alert, he faced the elder Malfoy, his arms rising to cross over his chest in a deceptively loose manner. “Lucius.”

 

“The last time we met, I didn't have my son with me.” He patted his son on his shoulder. “This is Draco. He'll be in your House, Severus.”

 

Severus glanced down at the young Malfoy wearing the same arrogant expression as his father and had no doubt he would be dealing with the child on a regular basis. Lucius had always boasted that his family had been in Slytherin for generations. If the boy was anything like his father, Severus knew he would have trouble on his hands, especially with the changes Severus had planned for the year.

 

Lucius made a show of searching the platform. “Where's your son? I had hoped to introduce the boys.”

 

“Are you delusional? So much for that arrogance of pure blood being better than any other. What in Merlin's name makes you think Harry would want anything to do with the likes of you?”

 

Severus couldn't have been more proud of Lily than he was at that moment. Lucius' sneering expression and cold gray eyes landed on her, setting Severus' teeth on edge. He knew the look in those eyes better than he would have liked.

 

“The likes of me? Have you forgotten the fact that your son comes from the likes of me? Of course, being the gracious and forgiving family that we are, we would be willing to overlook they boy's blood status and … guide him, if you will, in the ways of Wizarding society. He is, after all, the heir to the Potter name.”

 

Severus' eyes narrowed as his mind raced to figure out the game Lucius appeared to be playing. The man would never do anything that didn't benefit him. Perhaps he hoped to avoid any future scrutiny if his son and Harry were friends or, at minimum, associates. Severus ignored the slight against his family name. He had long ago come to accept how the Prince family was viewed among those with influence.

 

“He may be James' named heir, but that isn't going to influence whom he chooses to be friendly with. Harry understands what's truly important.”

 

Lucius narrowed his eyes. “I will only extend this offer of friendship once. Throw it away and you will wish you had taken a wiser course of action. I can make young Harry's time at Hogwarts easy or difficult.” He turned a smarmy grin onto Severus. “We know where a difficult time at Hogwarts can lead, don't we?”

 

Though his heart pounded, Severus merely raised an eyebrow, actually glad people seemed unable to mind their own business. “Threatening The Boy Who Lived, Lucius? In front of everyone gathered here? Perhaps it is _you_ who shall wish to have made a wiser choice.”

 

Lucius' cold gaze darted around at the curious onlookers as if he had forgotten where the four of them stood. His grip on Draco's shoulder tightened. “Draco, get on the train. Find your friends.”

 

“Yes, sir.”

 

As if trying to save face, Lucius nodded to the other two. “Mrs. Potter. Severus.” He forcefully bumped Severus' shoulder as he passed them.

 

“Well, that went well.”

 

A slight smile curved Severus' lips. “Indeed.”

 

“He has to know we want nothing to do with him. What's his motive for approaching us again and claiming to want to guide Harry in our ways? As if you couldn't do that?”

 

“His mention of Potter was intentional. James' family may not have been one of the Sacred Twenty-Eight, but the surname still carries with it a certain amount of honor, and with it comes certain expectations.”

 

Lily snorted in derision. “So, in other words, you wouldn't understand that because your family isn't a part of that sacred group, either. What a load of rubbish!”

 

“I'm back. Have the Weasleys come yet?”

 

“No, sweetheart, not yet.”

 

“Harry, do you remember seeing Lucius Malfoy at Diagon Alley the day your mother and I took you to purchase your school things?”

 

“Yeah. I didn't like him.”

 

Severus grinned for a moment. “That is good to hear. His son Draco is on the train this year. I tell you this only to make you aware. Draco may seek you out. The only thing I will tell you is that, in my experience, the Malfoys do not have friends; they have associates, people who can advance their fortune or power. You are more than capable of deciding for yourself whom you want as your friends. It would be wise to observe the actions of the person before deciding to befriend them.”

 

“What your father says makes a certain amount of sense, Harry, but there are some families out there who can be taken at face value. The Weasleys, for example. The Longbottoms are another.”

 

A pained expression twisted Harry's features. “Are you saying you _want_ me to be friends with Ginny's brother?”

 

Severus knew exactly to which brother Harry was referring. That brother could be more trouble than was worth. “Remember what I have said. Observe for yourself the measure of a person before you decide to reach out a hand of friendship.”

 

“I only meant, Harry, that there's more than one Weasley worth befriending.”

 

Severus let out a small sound of distaste. “If you begin acting like those twins, you will discover precisely how unpleasant I can be. If you need convincing, speak with them.”

 

One of Harry's brows rose. “You? Unpleasant?”

 

Lily snickered. Severus' reputation at Hogwarts was a bit of a teasing point between them, much to his exasperation at times. He glowered down at his son but was only able to hold the expression for a moment before his lips twitched. “Difficult as that may be for you to believe, yes.”

 

“Harry!”

 

A red-haired blur would have bowled his son over if not for Severus' quick reaction. While the girl's exuberance could be headache-inducing given the right circumstances, it also brought a nostalgic smile to his face. Another redhead, in another time, had greeted him with nearly as much enthusiasm on more than one occasion. Catching that girl's – now woman's – eye, he could see she remembered the same.

 

“Ginny! The platform is full of people! Never run off like that again!”

 

“Sorry, Mum.” Ginny faced the scarlet engine in awe. “I wish I could go with you.”

 

“Well, you can't,” Ginny's youngest brother stated. “Finally, I'll be somewhere you _won't_ be.”

 

“Ronald Weasley, if I hear talk like that again from you, you will be home so fast your head will spin.”

 

The Weasley boy hung his head and mumbled. At Harry's side, the youngest Weasley muttered something about wishing she had a wand. Covering his laugh with a cough, Severus anticipated the complete exasperation she would be causing his son in the future if he was ever dense enough to cause the girl to turn her temper onto him – and he would be at some point; there was no getting around it. Whether _history repeated itself_ as Minerva so eloquently put it was something Severus didn't want to contemplate. His son was only eleven! He wouldn't be thinking of girls in that manner for another couple of years at the very least. Reflexively, he ignored the amused voice in his head that reminded him _he_ hadn't waited that long to notice girls, or one girl in particular, not prepared to face that eventuality when it came to his son.

 

With a slight jolt, he tuned back into his surroundings, realizing Harry and Ginny had disappeared, along with the Weasley twins, the youngest Weasley male, and the Prefect. Lily and Molly chatted away as if nothing was amiss. Scanning the dense crowds around the platform didn't reveal Harry or Ginny. Severus fought his body's natural response of tensing when faced with an uncertainty and turned his attention back to the women.

 

“Tuned back into us, have you? I know we can be a bit boring, but –”

 

Severus snorted. “Lils, boring is something you definitely are not.” He smirked. “Independent. Stubborn. Quick-tempered. Those are words I would use to describe you.”

 

He nearly laughed at the flash of temper in her eyes, thinking he'd gained the upper hand at their game of wits, but her expression turned to one he had learned meant he needed to be wary.

 

“But you wouldn't love me otherwise, would you?”

 

Heat flooded his cheeks and Severus ducked his head. Yes, he should know by now Lily always won their verbal sparring matches, usually by embarrassing him, as she had just done. Mentioning his feelings to anyone, much less attempting to get him to admit to them, usually was the quickest way to shut him up. He had the wild impulse to say _yes_ and boldly kiss her in front of everyone. That would shut _her_ up, and he would have the last word, for once. The mental image of Lily sputtering speechlessly at him curled his lips into a full smile. One day, he would be bold enough to act on that impulse. Maybe. If it benefited him.

 

The engine whistle blew its shrill warning to any lingering students. Harry escorted Ginny back to them, gave her a quick hug, embraced Lily, then, turned to him. Severus had a moment to wonder whether Harry would offer him a hug before he received his answer. Harry did, indeed, wrap his arms around Severus' waist, though briefly, leaving Severus floundering a bit. Some days the two of them were as close as any father and son could be, sharing a joke – normally at Lily's expense – and, other days, there was an awkwardness between them as though they had just met that day.

 

“Bye, sweetheart. We'll see you later. Try to have some fun on the train.”

 

“Okay. Bye!”

 

Harry raced to the slowly departing train and leaped aboard, waving a final time before disappearing inside the carriage. Beside he and Lily, Severus noticed Molly wiping moisture from her eyes, complaining that it never got easier to say goodbye to her kids. A quick glance at Lily told him she didn't seem to share the Weasley woman's trouble, but he supposed knowing she would see Harry in a few hours made the difference. He had to admit, it was a bit of an odd feeling not having Harry with them since they had come to the platform with him. Severus didn't get the chance to think on it further, as Lily took his hand and led him back through the barrier to King's Cross.

 

SSLE

 

“Oh, Sev, I thought I had broken you of that.”

 

Severus looked down at his attire. Dressed in his usual trousers, boots, white shirt, his usual jacket and robe, he could see nothing wrong with what he wore. “What? This is my usual attire for teaching.”

 

“No doubt to make sure the students understand you won't accept any silliness. I think that's why you have such a hard time with the Weasley twins.”

 

“I cannot allow any nonsense in the lab. You know this. If I must dress this way to command their respect, so be it.”

 

Lily scoffed. “You don't need help to command anyone's respect, Sev. You're more than capable of that on your own.” Lily sighed as she ran a hand over his chest. “I guess I can see what you're saying, though. Maybe your NEWT-level students wouldn't need such a reminder.”

 

“Perhaps.” Seeing the time, Severus laced his fingers with Lily's. “The students will be arriving soon. We should go.”

 

“I hope Harry's trip was a good one. I hate to think that his first ride to Hogwarts was a terrible one.”

 

“We will know how it went when he arrives.”

 

Severus warded their quarters before they made their way up to the Great Hall. Taking their places at the staff table, Severus looked out upon the four long tables and pictured Harry sitting at each of them. He had not been lying when he had told Harry it did not matter which House the boy was placed into, but Severus _would_ be lying if he said he did not hope to see his son in his own House or even in Gryffindor. Standing up to Lucius that day on Diagon Alley was definitely Gryffindor-worthy. Harry's intelligence could certainly put him into Ravenclaw. His son willingly worked hard on whatever task was set before him. Did he really display any Slytherin traits? The only instance Severus could recall was taking the opportunity to make that map for Miss Weasley, but that was a stretch. Perhaps, as much as he loathed to admit it, Slytherin wasn't the place for Harry.

 

“And here I thought we'd seen the end of the coat.”

 

“He's a work in progress.”

 

“And you've made a lot of progress already. Poppy and I were talking just the other day at the changes we had seen.”

 

Severus sneered at Pomona and Lily as they chatted about him as if he wasn't sitting next to them, not that it seriously bothered him. People had gossiped about him for years; he had become accustomed to it. What was more, Severus knew neither of them meant any harm. Quirinus Quirrell, the new professor of Defense Against the Dark Arts tried to engage him in conversation, but Severus had absolutely nothing in common with the man. Quirinus seemed an odd choice for the post, his timid demeanor at odds with his subject, but Severus knew there weren't many people willing to take the job, with many qualified candidates believing the position to be cursed since no one had stayed beyond a single year. While he couldn't fathom how a teaching position could be cursed, it did appear something unusual was occurring.

 

Students trickled into the Great Hall drawing Severus' attention, so he nudged Lily with his knee since she had yet to notice. As he had suspected would happen, those who habitually glanced to the staff table each year to see who the new professors were did double takes, and the whispers began. Feeling the nervous energy radiating from Lily, Severus wanted to take her hand, but he did not want to project the idea she owed her presence at the table to him, nor did he want the students to disrespect her in any way. What he _did_ do was much more subtle. Severus slid his left foot back and over a few inches, just enough to nudge the inside of Lily's right ankle with the toe of his boot, which she responded by pressing her foot against his.

 

Minerva brought in the new students, and Severus quickly skimmed the group to find Harry. In the back was where he finally found his son, chatting easily enough with a plump, blond boy, who looked around himself in awe. The boy's somewhat hunched posture spoke of bashfulness. The other first-year students ignored the two boys in the back, but Severus could see, a bit of pride filling his chest, that being ignored by the others didn't upset Harry at all.

 

Minerva went through her typical speech and set up the Sorting Hat for its song, which Severus basically tuned out. He anxiously awaited the Sorting. Finally, the Sorting Hat finished and Minerva pulled out her scroll of names. Clapping politely at each House announcement, the closer Minerva came to Harry's name, the harder Severus' heart beat. By the way Harry shifted from one foot to the other, Severus knew Harry's nerves were getting the better of him. The blond boy Harry had been friendly with, Neville Longbottom, went to Gryffindor.

 

Pressure against his foot clued him in to the fact that Lily, too, was dealing with a bad case of nerves. Taking a risk, Severus folded his arms onto the tabletop, right hand dangling off the table edge but hidden, hoping Lily would take the hint. She did, mirroring his pose. Her questing fingers found his, and he hooked his around hers as much as he dared, his dark gaze constantly roving the Hall, in search of the smallest sign that their actions had been noticed.

 

“Snape, Harry.”

 

The name set off the whispers again. Severus watched as his son took the stool and put on the hat. Lily tightened her hold on his fingers. As the silence lengthened, he found it difficult to breathe, the anxieties Harry had regarding which House he would be Sorted into that his son had finally divulged to him just last night playing through Severus' head. The whispering grew louder the longer the hat took to make its announcement.

 

“Headmaster, I refuse to Sort this child into a single House.”

 

Severus threw an alarmed look at Lily before finding the Headmaster. Voices rose and echoed throughout the Hall, annoying Severus. Why could they not cease their incessant squawking and afford the Headmaster the opportunity to solve the issue?

 

“Pardon me, but you _must_ Sort him. Which House would be the best fit?”

 

“Headmaster, the only thing I _must_ do is refuse to Sort this child as you insist. I will not make the poor child choose.”

 

“My dear Hat, he needs to be placed into a House. He cannot attend without House affiliation. There are others still waiting to discover their Hogwarts families.”

 

“Headmaster, I never said this child would be without House affiliation. I merely stated I would not Sort him into a House.”

 

“Please explain.”

 

“This child is equally Gryffindor and Slytherin, but I refuse to make him choose one over the other for reasons that would be quite obvious, I would think. Therefore, I am assigning this child _both_ Houses.”

 

Severus couldn't believe what he had heard. One look at Lily told him she felt the same. Never had the Sorting Hat given any student multiple Houses! How would that work? Which dorm would he use? Which table would he sit at? It occurred to Severus that this resolution would put to rest his son's anxiety. Meeting Lily's eyes, he saw she had the same thought.

 

“It is not possible to have more than one House.”

 

“Headmaster, I have the ultimate say over which Houses get which students. It has been this way for hundreds of years. If you want a single name, then I can give you one. Gryff-therin. Or, if you prefer, Slyth-indor. That is my final decision and I will say no more on the matter. Next child, if you please.”

 

The Sorting Hat remained silent despite the Headmaster's attempts to draw it back into conversation. Stunned, Severus could only watch as Minerva pulled the Hat from Harry's head. A small, round table appeared near the main doors with a few chairs. When Harry turned to look up at them, Severus gave his son an acknowledging nod, half-smiling, pride shining from his dark eyes and evident in the slight upturn of his chin. Severus didn't have to look at Lily to know she wore a similar expression. Harry's relaxed posture and huge grin said it instead. He felt a laugh bubble up in his chest when Harry, head held high, walked straight to the little round table rather than sitting at either of the House tables. Severus could only imagine the headlines in tomorrow's Daily Prophet. For once, he was of a mind to let them talk. This development was, at least, worth the attention.

 

SSLE

 

As the Great Hall emptied after dinner, Severus, Lily, Minerva, and the Headmaster met with Harry for a quick chat. Lily hugged him tightly and exclaimed how proud she was of the way he had handled everything, telling him she wanted a full account of his train ride later. Then, she rolled her eyes.

 

“You just had to give everyone something to talk about, didn't you? I swear, you're becoming more like your father every day.” She said it with a grin and mussed Harry's hair, which he tried to dodge.

 

Ignoring Lily's teasing comment, Severus gently squeezed Harry's shoulder. “Interesting solution to your problem, I would say. Well done, Harry.”

 

“It wasn't entirely my idea. When the hat asked me which I preferred, I told it I didn't want to choose because it felt like choosing between you and Mum. The hat then stated I wouldn't have to, and you heard what it said.”

 

The Headmaster ran a hand over his beard. “Yes, and this is unprecedented. I do not even know if this will work.”

 

“Why wouldn't it, Albus? Any points he earns, he can choose which House they go to. Any points lost, _we_ would be doing the choosing. I'm sure Hogwarts has already provided a bed in each of the dorms. Severus and I can consult with each other as needed for Head of House business.”

 

Severus nodded his agreement with Minerva's suggestions. “I do not see any problems with her proposals, Headmaster.”

 

“Well, I suppose nothing can be done tonight. I will have to give this some thought. Good evening.”

 

Once the Headmaster had left, Harry asked, “Will he change what the Sorting Hat said? He's not going to make me choose, is he?”

 

The hand Severus still had on Harry's shoulder tightened slightly. “He will not.”

 

Minerva nodded. “That's right, Harry. The Headmaster will think it over and realize this is the best option for you. The only thing you'll need to decide is which dorm you want to sleep in on which night. Speaking of which, tonight, which dorm will it be?”

 

“Oh, er …” Harry glanced between his parents, uncertain.

 

“Sweetheart, it doesn't matter to us. I know your father has told you that already.”

 

“Yeah, I just wasn't sure he meant it.”

 

“Harry, I sincerely meant every word I said to you.”

 

“Okay, well, I guess I'll sleep in Slytherin tonight since it's closer. Maybe I can keep half my school texts in one dorm so I don't have to go so far from dorm to classroom.”

 

“Clever thinking. I'll leave it to your mother to inform you as to Gryffindor's common room location. The password is Caput Draconis. Without it, you will not be allowed entrance.”

 

“Thanks, Professor.”

 

“Severus, I'll leave it to you to escort your … student … to his common room.”

 

Severus gave his colleague a nod before she left. Using the slightest pressure, he guided Harry in the direction of the dungeon stairs, taking Lily's hand now that they were alone with no chance of being seen. He couldn't have been more pleased with the current turn of events. Silently, he listened as Harry described his experience on the train on their way down to the dungeons, frowning upon hearing of the confrontation between Harry and Draco, though it wasn't completely unexpected. That situation bore watching closely. To learn that Harry's one, and seemingly only, friend was Neville Longbottom, the timid, klutzy boy whom Severus had seen be so grateful to have been Sorted that he forgot to remove the Sorting Hat from his head, did not take Severus by surprise, though he did cringe inwardly at the boy's likely aptitude – or lack thereof – at Potions. Perhaps, paired with Harry, there would be fewer accidents.

 

“I don't know if we'll still be friends, though, since he's now in Gryffindor.”

 

“So are you. You just have an extra House. Surely, he'll understand that.”

 

Harry shrugged. “I don't know, Mum. He's pretty shy. If any of the Gryffindors give him trouble for being friends with me, he might decide not to be friends anymore.”

 

“If he is so easily swayed by his peers, then perhaps it is best not to cultivate any friendship with him.”

 

“Severus! You, of all people, know how convincing one's peers can be!”

 

Suitably chastised, Severus sighed. “Yes, unfortunately, I do. However, Mr. Longbottom has been placed into Gryffindor, a House, as you well know, known for its bravery. The boy should be able to display those traits.”

 

“I'm sure he will if given time. Some people simply need a little reassurance in order to flourish.”

 

Severus had the distinct impression Mr. Longbottom was not the only person to which Lily was referring. Glancing in her direction, he saw his suspicions were correct; it was there in her eyes. From the time he had met Lily, under her gentle compassion, he had, indeed, flourished – if only for a few years. Then, his fascination with the Dark Arts took complete control of him, and he had made the biggest mistake of his life.

 

Lily bumped his shoulder with hers. “Hey, you weren't supposed to brood.”

 

Severus' brow raised. “I do not indulge in angst-riddled brooding.” Smirking, he added, “Brooding is for emotionally-driven Gryffindors.”

 

“Careful, Sev. Your son is one of them.”

 

Severus turned his attention to Harry, who had been watching the two of them. Lifting his hand from his son's shoulder, he dropped it lightly onto Harry's head and smiled, pride shining in his eyes.

 

“That he is.”

 

As they came to the door to their private quarters, Lily stopped. “This is where I say good night, Harry. I'll see you at breakfast, though I may not get a chance to speak to you.”

 

Harry looked up at her, puzzled. “You're not going to see where the common room is?”

 

“I already know that you follow this corridor and turn left. Halfway there is a blank wall that hides the entrance.”

 

“You've known?”

 

“Your father showed me today.”

 

“All of the professors are aware of the common room locations and are able to gain entrance if the need arises with the use of an overriding password assigned by the Headmaster.”

 

“Oh. I guess that makes sense.” Harry gave his mother a hug. “Good night, Mum.”

 

Severus walked the remaining distance with Harry, uncertain as to the reception his son would receive amongst the members of his House. Tapping the unoccupied stretch of stone wall with his wand, he muttered the password and stepped through the door that appeared, nudging Harry ahead of him, bringing instant silence to the crowded common room.

 

After instructing the boys' prefect to take Harry to his dorm, Severus studied his students, some competent in hiding their thoughts, others not so much.

 

“So, he's a Slytherin, then?”

 

Turning to face the fourth-year who had spoken, Severus studied the boy with a critical eye. “As the Sorting Hat has declared, so shall it be.”

 

“But the Sorting Hat also said Gryffindor,” another student argued, likely emboldened by the first's question.

 

“Did I not make myself clear, Mr. Cambridge?”

 

“So, the Headmaster is allowing him to have two Houses?”

 

“Ms. Farley, you attended the same Feast as I. Did you not hear the Sorting Hat declare it had sole responsibility of Sorting the students?”

 

“Yes, sir.”

 

Severus made eye contact with every student in the room. “For years, Slytherin has been denigrated for what makes us Slytherins. It is time we proved Slytherin is _not_ synonymous with Darkness. Merlin, himself, was one of us. The time has come to follow his example and be the best witches and wizards at Hogwarts – not by cheating, but by displaying the cunning with which we have been gifted to outwit and outplay the others. Harsh disciplinary repercussions will await anyone who soils the Slytherin name.”

 

“Why now? You didn't seem to care before, so why now?” A seventh-year piped up, one Severus knew to believe the Dark Lord's rhetoric. The boy's smarmy expression grated on Severus' nerves. “Is it because your son has joined us? Ashamed of what this House has done in the past – with your blessings – now that _he_ is here? Or are you looking to impress the boy's Mud – ”

 

Severus forced himself to merely lift an eyebrow at the boy's insolence rather than curse him as he would very much enjoy doing. “Finish that statement, Mr Sterling, and you will be the first to experience the harsh disciplinary measures I have mentioned. This House has lost the respect of its peers; we will work to regain it, beginning with showing respect where it is due, regardless of our own personal opinions. It will not be easy; however, I believe the dividends we will reap will be worth the effort. Have I made myself clear?”

 

Severus' dark, penetrating gaze found every face present and awaited a sign of understanding before continuing. “Very well. Timetables will be given at breakfast as always. Do not be tardy.”

 

One of the hardest things he'd ever done was to spin on his heel and leave his son behind. It felt as if he was throwing the boy to the wolves, or, in this case, leaving him in a pit of vipers. Escaping the room, Severus returned to the only source of comfort he had ever known.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 


	5. I'm Here For You

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Happy New Year to those in 2019 already! Here's an update. Enjoy because it may be a bit before the next one. I've been writing one of my other Severitus stories lately. I don't want to completely lose the chapter cushion I have between what is posted here and what I've written.
> 
> 700 hits?! For my little story? That just blows my mind. Thank you all. You're so awesome!

_**Friendship … is about who walked into your life, said, “I'm here for you” and proved it.** _

– _**Unknown**_

 

 

“You reject me and take up with Longbottom? I don't think I've ever been so insulted. You've got a lot to learn, and I'm going to enjoy teaching it to you.”

 

Harry paused in donning his uniform shirt to look over at the sneering Draco and his two hulking sidekicks. Unable to help himself, Harry raised one brow and smirked. "If you think you can. I've been told to take the measure of a person by the way they act, and, believe me, you leave a lot to be desired."

 

The pointy-chinned blond narrowed his gray eyes. “You think you're so special with your fame, that stupid scar, and having both your parents here at the castle, but you're wrong. You don't belong in Slytherin. This is the House for pure-bloods. You're nothing but a filthy half-blood at best. You're only here because your father happens to be the Head of House.”

 

Harry finished with his shirt and reached for a tie striped with green and silver. He held it up for Draco to see. "I don't know. It looks like I belong here. As for the rest of what you said, I'm as special as anyone else here." Halfway through tying the knot, Harry noticed Draco's red face and the anger in the boy's eyes and shook his head pityingly. "Did your parents not ever tell you that you're special, Draco? Now, that's just sad." Harry walked up to the other boy, put his hands on Draco's shoulders and said in a manner that clearly showed Harry was mocking him, "You're special, Draco. There. Now, you've heard it and have no reason to be jealous."

 

“Jealous?! Of you? What could you possibly have that would make me jealous?”

 

Now pulling on his green-lined school robe, Harry affected a nonchalant attitude. “Oh, maybe the fact that I'm more well-known than you, that they know me as soon as they see me, whereas, most people have to hear your name before they know who you are. Then, there's the fact that my parents care enough about me to tell me to look for _friends_ , rather than associates. They've actually _shown_ they care about me. Can you say the same for yours?”

 

“Well, at least mine aren't as weak and pathetic as yours, a coward and a Mudblood.” Crabbe and Goyle, the two hulking sidekicks, snickered dumbly.

 

Whirling, Harry grabbed his wand, strode to Draco, and pushed the other boy against the wall, jabbing the boy in the neck with the tip of his wand. Every bit of anger Harry felt at hearing that term aimed at his mum shone in his green eyes. When he spoke, his voice was soft and smooth, much like father's often was when riled.

 

“Never call my mother that again. My dad was no coward. He admitted to his mistakes and faced the consequences, unlike others who pretended to have acted under coercion to escape punishment.”

 

“Are you calling my father a coward?”

 

“As the saying goes: _If the shoe fits, wear it._ ” Not wanting to get into trouble for fighting, Harry released Draco, stepped back, and slid his wand in his sleeve. “Stay out of my way, Draco, or you and I will have problems.”

 

Harry headed for the door to their dorm but stopped at Draco's hate-filled words. “Your problems have only just begun, _Potter._ ”

 

Not facing the blond Slytherin, Harry laughed, then said over his shoulder, “You think calling me Potter is going to get some reaction out of me, like I'm going to be offended or something? I'd be honored to carry the name of the man who died trying to protect me. Anyone die trying to protect you? Anyone love you so much that they were willing to lay down their life for yours?” Silence stretched for a couple of moments. “Didn't think so.”

 

As Harry headed for the common room, he felt a pair of hands shove him into the wall. A group of upperclassmen laughed as they passed him, throwing taunts about him needing two Houses to make him a whole student. Climbing the dungeon stairs, someone's foot tangled with his, and Harry tripped, scraping his palms on the stone as he tried to catch himself. His knees protested the remainder of the climb, likely bruised and scraped from his fall. Harry couldn't say who had done it, but judging by the snorts and laughter, it hadn't been an accident. None of the behavior surprised him. It was true, he wasn't a pure-blood, nor was he entirely Slytherin. He didn't think those were the real reasons for the animosity, though. He believed it stemmed from the single event that had exalted his name to celebrity status. Many of the those in Slytherin had Death Eater parents, or, at the very least, believed in what Voldemort had preached, so it was only natural there would be hostility between the followers and the so-called vanquisher.

 

“Harry?”

 

Harry turned away from the direction of the big oak doors of the Great Hall to see Neville hesitantly shuffling toward him. “Hi, Neville. I would have thought you'd have been in there by now.”

 

“Slept late. None of the other boys woke me up.” Neville fidgeted a little, staring at his shoes. “They think it's a big joke that I was put into Gryffindor.”

 

“Well, the joke's on them, then. To stand here and talk to me, a Slytherin, takes courage.”

 

The boy smiled faintly and shrugged, briefly meeting Harry's eyes. “Not really. You're not a complete Slytherin. You're Gryffindor, too.”

 

“Then, the joke's doubly on them because they'll have a Slytherin, even a partial one, in their dorm when I stay there. Why don't you sit with me? I'm sure my little round table will still be there. Come on, let's go see.”

 

“Alright. I guess.” Noticing Harry's stiff gait, he asked, “What happened to you?”

 

“Nothing. I just … tripped. I'm fine.”

 

Harry wasn't about to admit to what really transpired, not when he could be overheard and his words twisted to sound like whinging. He certainly didn't want it to get back to either of his parents. They had enough to worry about, especially his dad with his incredibly full schedule, without adding his minor issues to them. No, he wasn't going to give the others the satisfaction of seeing him run to his parents just because things weren't all peaches and cream.

 

Stepping inside the vast room, the first thing Harry noticed was his parents. While his mum seemed to be concerned, his dad's brow furrowed – not in a scowl but as if he was trying to puzzle something out. The second thing that caught his attention was the table he'd come to think of as his, right where it had been the night before, hosting a selection of foods. Motioning to Neville, he pointed this out, grinning. Amid grumbles, mutters, and whispers, the two took seats opposite of each other, Harry sitting with his back to the wall, not willing to show Slytherin his vulnerable side.

 

“Yes! Hot chocolate and churros! I've missed having those since we've been here.” Harry poured some of the thick hot chocolate into a cup, laughing at Neville's expression. “It's not like your hot chocolate, I know. This is thick enough to be eaten with a spoon. Or, you can just do this.” He dunked a sugar-sprinkled, stick-like pastry into his chocolate and left it there to stand freely. “See? Not much better than this for breakfast.” With that declaration, Harry bit off a chocolate-y chunk.

 

“Okay, I get that that's chocolate, even if it is thick as molasses, but what is _that_?”

 

“It's called a churro. It's like a doughnut but long and round instead and sprinkled with sugar and honey. Try one. Remember me telling you about growing up in Spain on the way here yesterday? This is something we had on a halfway regular basis. Since Mum and I have been here, though, we haven't had it. I wonder if Mum specifically asked for it.”

 

Looking up at the staff table, Harry snorted his amusement. From what he could see, his mum seemed to be enjoying a breakfast similar to his own, while his dad occasionally threw sour looks at her food. No doubt his plate contained a typical English breakfast. Because he happened to be looking, he saw his mum break off a piece of her churro and slid it, almost sneakily, onto his dad's plate. Harry laughed out loud at his dad's expression, as if the piece of fried dough on his plate offended him greatly and couldn't believe his mum had dared to taint it in such a fashion. Catching Harry's eye, his mum gave him a faint smile and wink.

 

“Your mum is really brave, but then, I guess that's why she was in Gryffindor, yeah? I've, er, heard rumors about your dad, how he is in class and stuff.”

 

Seeing how nervous his friend was, Harry merely shrugged. “He has to be strict because one little mistake could mean disaster. I know about the things he used to do and say. I've heard it before from a lot of people who said they pitied me for being his son. If you give him a chance though, I think you'll find he's a little different now.”

 

“I'm sure I'd be no good at Potions. I'm too accident-prone. He'll probably yell at me or something.”

 

“Tell you what, if we have Potions together, then you and I can sit at the same table. I'll help you. Okay?”

 

“Okay.” Neville, looking relieved, finished off his porridge. “Do you have to call him Professor? And does he have to call you by your last name?”

 

“Yeah, and let me tell you, it's going to be so weird. I'm sure I'll slip up once or twice. I understand why it has to be that way. Professional distance and no showing of favoritism, that kind of thing.”

 

“That makes sense.”

 

Harry finished off his own breakfast, then scooped some eggs and sausages onto a plate, knowing he was likely going to be very busy today going up and down all those stairs so would need something to keep him going until lunch. Professor McGonagall stopped by the table to hand Neville's timetable to him.

 

“What do you have first?”

 

Neville gulped. “Potions.”

 

“Well, I guess it's best to get your worst class out of the way, isn't it?”

 

“I guess. The good news is that I don't have it again until Thursday, and it's not the first class, either.”

 

“That's something, then.”

 

Harry had just finished his remaining breakfast when his dad handed him his timetable. He reached for it, but his dad grabbed his wrist and stared at the scraped palm. Harry felt like smacking himself with his other hand for not thinking to keep it hidden, but that would just show the scrapes on _that_ hand, as well. When his dad silently set the parchment on the table and slipped his wand from his sleeve, Harry tried to pull his hand away, acutely aware of the eyes on them – and not just the Slytherins, though, they were the ones who concerned Harry the most.

 

“I tripped. I'm fine.”

 

Fingers tightened around his wrist, preventing Harry from freeing his hand. Still not speaking, his dad healed the reddened skin, then, looked towards Harry's other hand, brow raised. Sighing, he presented the other one. In a split second, the skin on that palm returned to normal. Snickers and murmured snide remarks from their end of the Slytherin table reached his ears, and Harry could only assume, his dad's ears as well. Harry knew his dad had heard when he shifted his weight slightly and turned his head in that group's direction the tiniest fraction of an inch, raising his brow again as if to ask if they were the ones responsible. Harry refused to say anything one way or the other, which was probably answer enough. After a moment, his dad sighed through his nose and released Harry's hand.

 

“There will be no excuses for poor performance in my classroom. Do not be late.” With a nod, he returned his wand to his sleeve and exited the Great Hall, his robe billowing behind him.

 

Harry's discomfort melted away at his dad's statement, said in a sufficient volume to reach the Slytherin table. The remarks changed from _Needed your Daddy already_ to _Daddy has no confidence in his own son._ Those didn't bother him. He was rather proficient at making potions – the parts he'd been allowed to do anyway – and his dad knew it. Picking up his timetable, he looked it over.

 

“Hey, we have Potions together! History of Magic is next. Yuck. Don't get too excited. I've met the professor, and he's _boring_ , even for a ghost. After lunch, I have Transfiguration, Charms, and Astronomy.”

 

Neville looked a bit disappointed. “We only have Potions in common today. Herbology is my second class this morning. After lunch, my classes are opposite of yours, except I don't have Astronomy.”

 

“Well, at least I can help you with Potions class. We should probably get our stuff. I can meet you here or at the lab.”

 

Neville appeared a bit pale and gulped. “I'll meet you at the lab. I think I should probably try to find it on my own. Just in case.”

 

“In case of what?" Harry's friend nervously dropped his gaze and fiddled with his silverware, glancing once over his shoulder at the Gryffindor table. Harry clued into his friend's worry instantly. "You're afraid they might try something. Would they? I mean, I know, generally speaking, Gryffindors can act rashly and be hot-headed, but would they really go that far?" Neville merely shrugged. "Well, tell me if they do. Come on, let's go."

 

SSLE

 

While waiting for the lab door to open, Harry sat on the floor and thought about his friend. Neville seemed rather sure that the Gryffindors he knew could resort to violence, and that worried Harry. Should he say anything to Professor McGonagall since she was Gryffindor's Head of House? Or maybe say something to his parents and let them tell the professor? After giving it a bit of thought, he decided he wouldn't say anything for now and just watch for any signs of trouble. After all, he didn't want his parents to know about the near-constant comments being made about him, nor about the shoving and tripping, which Harry was sure was done on purpose. Not only that, but from what he could tell, nothing had actually been done to Neville yet, so there really wasn't anything anyone could do.

 

One of the Gryffindor girls, one with bushy brown hair, stopped a short distance from the classroom door, muttering to herself, but loud enough that Harry could overhear her. She seemed to be mentally running through a checklist of potion ingredients and their properties, two of which she had completely wrong. Harry tried pointing it out to her, but she huffed, pulled out her text to find the correct page, and shoved it in his face.

 

“See? I'm the one who's right. You're the one who's wrong. I guess you don't know as much as you thought you did.”

 

A bit taken aback by the heat in her voice, Harry stared at her silently a moment. He had only been trying to help, but if she wanted to act all smug and think she knew everything, Harry was inclined to let her believe it.

 

Lightly taking her wrist, he pushed it and the book out of his face, rising to his feet. “Fine. Believe what you want, but I'm telling you, it's wrong.”

 

“It's not wrong. It's in the text. How can the text be wrong? You just don't want to be bested by a Muggle-born.”

 

Seriously? Did she just call him prejudiced against Muggle-borns? An eyebrow rose as he crossed his arms over his chest, chin lifting. "Apparently _you're_ not the know-it-all you seem to think you are.”

 

Twin spots of color blossomed in her cheeks as her anger appeared to take hold. “What's that supposed to mean?”

 

A quiet voice came from down the corridor. “It means, Hermione, that his mum is a Muggle-born. How did you not know that?”

 

Harry looked around the girl in front of him and spotted Neville heading their way. It had felt nice to have his friend stick up for him in front of another Gryffindor. Harry hoped he'd never have to return the favor, but would, without hesitation, if it became necessary.

 

The girl sputtered and stammered. “Oh, er, well, er, how was I supposed to know?”

 

Harry snorted. “Maybe by not making judgments about people?”

 

“Okay, yes, I can see where I messed up on that, and I'm sorry for it.”

 

There was a groan of frustration and then a voice Harry recognized as Ginny's brother Ron, said, “Not you too. It's bad enough he's gotten his fangs into Neville, although it doesn't surprise me, but you too? I thought you were smart. That's what you kept saying yesterday anyway.”

 

Snickers could be heard around them, and Harry realized all of the other first-year Gryffindors and Slytherins had arrived. Though he didn't want to make a scene, he wasn't going to let anyone disparage his friend, either.

 

“Don't insult Neville like that. He's just as smart as anyone else, maybe even more so since he doesn't appear to be friends with you.”

 

Ginny's brother rounded on him. “No one asked for your opinion.”

 

“Same could be said for you. Ginny certainly didn't.”

 

“You leave my sister out of this!”

 

“Why? That's why you can't stand me, isn't it? Because I'm friends with your sister?”

 

“I don't like you. I don't like your kind. My family has never associated with the likes of you. I don't know why they are now, except that they're enamored with your fame and hoping some of it will rub off on them.”

 

“As if,” sneered Draco.

 

“Shut up, Malfoy!”

 

“Oh, I'm so scared, Weasley. What are you going to do to me if I don't?”

 

Ron Weasley drew his wand; Malfoy drew his. Figuring it wasn't smart to get into any sort of fight on the first day of classes, much less in a crowded corridor, Harry stepped between them, a hand out to each of the two.

 

“Are you two that stupid? You do realize we're in a cramped corridor, don't you? You do remember that it's only the first day of school, right? Not to mention the trouble you'll be in if you get caught?”

 

Ron's ear tips reddened and he scowled fiercely. “Of course, _you'd_ take up for your fellow Snake.”

 

“Weasley, you're delusional if you think I want or need _him_ to defend me.”

 

“I'm not trying to support or defend anyone except for the innocent bystanders who might get caught in the middle if you two decide to have a go at each other. Bloody hell, I guess there's a reason neither of you was Sorted into Ravenclaw."

 

Ron raised his wand to point directly at Harry. “You shut your mouth, _Snape_ , or I'll shut it for you.”

 

“I think not.” The lazily drawled voice came out of the shadows, accompanied by a hand that forcefully parted Ron's wand from his fist. “Mr. Weasley, I advise you to take your own advice and do be silent before your arrogance gets you into further trouble. Mr. Malfoy, put it away or you'll find yourself joining Mr. Weasley in detention with me this evening.”

 

“Detention?”

 

“Yes, Mr. Weasley. Detention. For threatening another student.”

 

Harry had to bite his lip to keep from grinning. His dad had timed his appearance perfectly, intentional or not. One or two Slytherins and all of the Gryffindors had stiffened at his dad's voice, fear evident in their eyes. It only made Harry want to laugh that much more. His dad's reputation had definitely preceded him. If only they knew what _he_ did, they wouldn't be so intimidated.

 

As they all filed into the room, Harry grabbed Neville's arm, knowing the boy was nearly too timid to move and dragged him to a table near the front. "I can help you if we sit next to each other."

 

“Congratulations, Mr. Weasley,” Harry heard from behind him as his dad strode to the front of the room, his cloak fluttering with the quick steps. “You have the dubious distinction of breaking the record previously held by your brothers of earliest detention set by me. Be back here at dinner's conclusion. As for the rest of you –”

 

The girl named Hermione lifted her hand. “Sir? May I ask a question?”

 

Harry nearly winced at the interruption. His dad _loathed_ being interrupted, no matter who it was. The flexing of his jaw muscle, the thinned lips, narrowed eyes, yes, every sign of his dad's temper was there. To Harry's surprise, those dark eyes met his gaze for a brief moment before returning to the girl.

 

“What is it, Miss …?”

 

“Granger, sir. On page twenty-two of our text, it clearly states that ground dandelion seeds are used in the Dandelion Skin Salve, but,” here she glared in Harry's direction, “I've been told that the seeds are merely crushed. The text is correct, isn't it? Otherwise, it wouldn't be in a school text.”

 

Harry rolled his eyes at the girl but was intrigued when his dad's brows furrowed and held out his hand. "Your text, Miss Granger."

 

Rummaging in his bag, Harry found his copy of the text and opened it to the page Granger had mentioned. Sure enough, just as the girl had said, it stated ground dandelion seeds in the ingredient list. A book snapping shut startled him, and he looked up to see his dad scowling.

 

“It appears there is a printing error in that recipe. Whoever told you, Miss Granger, that the salve used crushed dandelion seeds was, indeed, correct."

 

Harry snickered as Granger's expression of haughtiness melted away, glad the girl had been set straight. He hadn't missed the glance from his dad when he had answered the girl, either, which made Harry wonder just how much of the conversation out in the corridor the man had heard. Harry knew quite well how quietly his dad could move, a skill learned from is spying days, no doubt, but had he been present the entire time? Had he heard the things Granger and Weasley had said to him? Harry dearly hoped not.

 

Harry startled a bit when a piece of chalk was slapped onto the table in front of him. Looking up, he knew his dad had caught him being inattentive, and his cheeks flushed guiltily.

 

“I believe you know the correct recipe, do you not?”

 

“Yes, sir,” Harry squeaked out. It wasn't that he feared his dad, just that he felt he had disappointed him.

 

“Write it out so everyone will know it.” He pointed to the chalkboard.

 

Nodding, Harry stood with the chalk and stepped up to the board, a few snickers echoing around the room. He had brought this on himself for letting his mind wander. Inhaling deeply to steady his nerves, he began to write down the recipe list and the instructions. Just as he began to run out of space, the board expanded. For several long moments, the only sound in the room came from the squeak of the chalk across the board's surface, a sound that grated on Harry's nerves. He'd witnessed his dad magically spell the chalk to write on the board and not once did it squeak.

 

Finally finished, Harry placed the chalk in the little tray under the board and turned to face his dad, not knowing what to expect. His dad had his arms crossed over his chest, his robe pulled tightly around him, looking none too pleased, and at that moment, Harry could certainly understand why so many students had feared him. He gulped. When he received a slight nod, Harry took it to mean he could sit and tried not to scurry to his seat, though, he didn't take his time, either.

 

“I suggest, now that it has been so kindly corrected for you in handwriting easily legible, that you correct it in your texts.” A gasp had the professor turning, brow raised. “Miss Granger, is there a problem?”

 

“You want us to _write_ in our books?”

 

“Unless you prefer to learn the potion incorrectly. Either way, it is of no consequence to me." Everyone scrambled to do as instructed. "This is the potion we shall begin with today. I need to see what skills you possess or if I need to teach you the absolute basics of potion-making. Begin when you have finished making the necessary corrections."

 

With Harry guiding Neville, the two of them synchronized their efforts, finishing the salve before anyone else. Scooping their finished products into jars to be turned in, the two of them made their way to the sinks to clean out their cauldrons.

 

“Thanks, Harry. That was easy, but it wouldn't have been without you helping me.”

 

“You don't have to thank me, Neville. I already told you I'd help you.”

 

As they returned to their table, Harry saw his dad studying their jars of salve, holding them up to the light, then checking their consistencies. Neville's steps faltered, but Harry pushed him forward. Reaching their table, Harry put away his cauldron, not the least bit worried about his salve. This was one he had assisted his dad in making – as far as he could, of course. The wand involvement he hadn't been able to do for obvious reasons. Harry awaited his dad's verdict.

 

“Five points to each of you for perfect salves and for being the first ones to finish. Full marks for the both of you.”

 

Pride had Harry standing a little straighter at the praise. He'd proven to himself that he could complete a potion, but, more importantly, he'd shown it to his dad. As the man passed to the next table, Harry felt his dad's hand lightly squeeze his shoulder, the briefest of moments. There and gone. A joyous smile spread across his face at the gesture, taking it as it was meant, as a way for his dad to say he was proud of him, much the same way his mum hugged him or mussed his hair.

 

“Full marks! Can you believe it, Harry? It's all thanks to you.”

 

“I didn't do much, Neville. All I did was help with the timing. You did all of the work. There's a bit of a rhythm to potion-making. Once you figure that out, the rest is easy.”

 

“Well, I have no rhythm, so I'm going to have a tough time of it, I'm afraid."

 

“I bet you could with a little practice. The muggles have this thing called a metronome that musicians use to help keep a beat. If you practiced with one of those, I bet you could do well. I could get one. I'm sure Da-, er, the professor would let us use the lab sometimes. If you want to, that is.”

 

“Sure. I think I could use all the help I could get.”

 

“Okay, I'll ask him.”

 

“Miss Granger, your salve is slightly lighter in color, and the consistency is more gritty than it should be. Pay closer attention to the stirring phase and the consistency will improve. Overall, acceptable."

 

Harry nearly grinned at hearing he had done better than the annoying girl. His amusement evaporated when he heard her hiss at him. "You probably took a shortcut or something, or used a method that we're not being taught for you to have finished before anyone else."

 

Scowling, Harry retorted, “No, I didn't. I followed the same method everyone else did. It's not my fault I did better than you.”

 

Apparently, his dad must have overheard them as he turned to face Granger and said sternly, “There may be alternate methods to some potions, but there is none for this particular one. I highly suggest the next time you make an accusation such as that, you have evidence to back up your claim.”

 

Red-faced, Granger ducked her head. For what little bit of time remained of the class, Harry and Neville talked quietly, their supplies put away and ready for the bell to clang. When it did, the friends exited, not paying much attention to the others. In the Entrance Hall, Harry said goodbye as Neville headed for the greenhouses while Harry headed up to History of Magic, his last class of the morning.

The instant Professor Binns opened his mouth to begin his lecture, Harry silently groaned. This class was going to be the dullest ever, just as he'd expected. He supposed he could use the class time to catch up on his other classwork when necessary; he'd just read the chapters of the text and hope that would be good enough. Even a few of the Ravenclaws he had the class with appeared thoroughly bored. Pulling out his Potions text, Harry decided to skim through the potions it contained to see if any other errors needed to be addressed.

 

After class, Harry rushed down to his dorm to trade out his morning texts and potions supplies for his Transfiguration, Charms, and Astronomy texts. With his bag thrown over his shoulder, Harry headed up to the library, hoping to skim through the first chapters of each of the subjects to familiarize himself with what they may be doing. As he sat at one of the tables, Harry briefly wondered how his mum's day was going. He knew her day wasn't as busy as his dad's, but she wasn't used to teaching, either. It would be interesting to talk to her to see how it went. The thought to write to Ginny about his day entered his head, so he decided to do that rather than looking through texts he'd already skimmed.

 

Harry's afternoon went well, with no classes with the Gryffindors. Professor McGonagall was an excellent teacher, strict yet fair. Professor Flitwick's class consisted of theory, but the tiny excitable professor made it fun. Professor Sinistra was an unknown quantity. She had been gone until yesterday, so he hadn't had a chance to meet her. The dark-skinned professor took her subject very seriously and not once smiled during her lecture. It made for a weird day after coming from Professor Flitwick's class.

 

After dinner, Harry returned to the library to finish the letter to Ginny, telling her about the classes, and after a little deliberation, about the things some of the students have said to and about him, _not_ mentioning Ron, thinking it would only cause trouble in her family.

 

“Hey, Harry.”

 

Harry looked up at the greeting. “Hi, Neville.”

 

“Who are you writing to?”

 

“Ginny. Ron's sister. We became friends over the summer.”

 

“Oh. So that's what you and Ron were talking about, then.”

 

“Yeah.” Harry rolled his eyes. “Apparently, he doesn't approve, but Mr. and Mrs. Weasley are nice, not holding Dad's past against him, so it doesn't really matter what he thinks.”

 

“I'm glad they've been so nice to you. So, you and Ginny just met, and you're really good friends already?"

 

“Yeah. Funny, right?” Harry shrugged. “We just seemed to hit it off instantly. So, what brings you to the library?”

 

“Just looking for somewhere to study my Transfiguration notes. That class is going to be hard.”

 

“You're not kidding about that. You can sit here. I'm going to finish my letter and then get down to the Owlery. I promised Ginny that I'd send her a letter telling her about the first day. She won't be here until next year.”

 

Harry finished off his letter to Ginny and sealed it, expanded on Neville's Transfiguration notes, then headed off to post the letter.

 

SSLE

 

Severus let himself into his quarters, dropped onto his sofa and sighed. He had forgotten how emotionally and physically taxing it could be to teach. Sinking into his seat, he lowered his head to the sofa back, closing his eyes. He'd have given anything to have a little drink before dinner, to help him relax, but thanks to his father, he didn't have that option. Severus had never touched a drop of alcohol for fear he would turn into Tobias Snape. Reveling in the current silence, he felt his tension slowly melt away, drifting into a light doze.

 

A soft touch of lips against his woke him. Slowly opening his eyes to Lily standing over him from behind, concern in her green eyes, he smiled tiredly and reached up to bring her lips back to his in a slow upside-down kiss, exploring every bit of her mouth, the scent of raspberries filling his nose. Severus had the vague thought that he didn't need oxygen to survive; he just needed Lily.

 

With a little sigh, she ended the kiss and looked down at him. “I'd ask how your day went, but I think I already know.”

 

Tugging her hand, he convinced her to sit next to him on the sofa, pulling her into his side and dropped his head to the top of hers. "I do not understand how, but I seem always to forget the difficulty of the first few days. Students trying my patience every class with their inability to follow even the simplest of instructions. Even the NEWT years appeared to have forgotten everything they have been taught."

 

Lily shifted in his arms to face him more, sliding a lock of hair from his cheek to behind his ear as she looked up at him, cupping his face, thumb caressing his cheekbone. “Poor Sev. Done in by his own students.”

 

Recognizing the humor in her voice and eyes, Severus scowled. “I see no humor in it. I have had to deal with the Gryffindor and Slytherin first-years, second-years, and third-years, the Ravenclaw and Hufflepuff fifth-years, and the NEWT level class.”

 

“How _did_ the Gryffindor/Slytherin first-year class go? Rival Houses couldn't have been easy.”

 

Severus hesitated, not sure how much he should say. He could leave out everything that happened before class began, merely mentioning Harry's success and how he had helped his friend, but would that be fair to Lily? If the roles were reversed, he would want to know that something extra had occurred.

 

“Sev? What is it? Something happened, didn't it?”

 

“I have a charm on the area outside the classroom so I can be aware of any issues before I arrive and overheard some unpleasant things." Sev snorted derisively. As he listed off the various things, his irritation grew. "Between the youngest Weasley boy and this girl named Granger, Harry was accused of being Dark, being prejudiced against Muggle-borns, and then, in class, of cheating to finish his work first and produce a perfect salve."

 

Beside him, Lily sighed. “I was afraid the Weasley brother would be troublesome after what happened at Ginny's birthday party. I had hoped he'd come to accept Harry as Ginny's friend, but I see that's not the case. I haven't met the Granger girl.”

 

“She is Gryffindor's version of Draco Malfoy, but with knowledge instead of money.”

 

“Surely she isn't that bad, is she?”

 

“Are you accusing me of exaggeration?" After a moment, Sev sighed. "Perhaps, not to the same extent, but her arrogance does bring young Malfoy to mind. Harry attempted to correct the girl's recitation of the ingredients used in the Dandelion Skin Salve. She did not take it well, interrupting me at the beginning of class to prove herself correct."

 

“Oh, no.”

 

“Quite. The positive to that is it brought to my attention a misprint in the text."

 

“That's a good thing, then. Let me guess. This is the girl who accused Harry of cheating.”

 

“Indeed.”

 

“Do you think it would make a difference if I talked to the girl, Muggle-born Gryffindor to Muggle-born Gryffindor?”

 

“Perhaps. Or, perhaps it would only make things worse for Harry. I will leave that decision to you.”

 

“How did Harry take everything?”

 

Severus covered the hand on his cheek with his own, kissing her palm. A proud smile toyed with his lips. "Beautifully. You will be proud to know he channeled his inner Gryffindor and stepped between Mr. Malfoy and Mr. Weasley to keep things from escalating when they had drawn their wands."

 

Lily's eyes widened. “Wands were drawn? Please tell me you intervened before anything happened.” Severus gave her his raised brow in response, eliciting a laugh from her. “Of course you did.”

 

“I could not have been prouder of him.” Severus made an irritated noise in his throat. “Not expressing it was infinitely more difficult than I had anticipated. The best I could do was a brief touch and had to make it appear incidental at that.”

 

Lily pressed her lips to his forehead, slid down to his nose, then brushed against his lips. "I'm sure he understood. If not, you can always tell him this weekend. Now, we should head up to the Great Hall. It's almost time for dinner."

 

Grimacing, Severus dropped his head to the cushion once more. “I would prefer to remain here – with you.”

 

“Well, I never thought I'd see the day when Severus Snape whinged over something.”

 

Scowling, he unequivocally stated, “I do not whinge. I do not sulk. I do not brood.” Smirking, he added, “Those are actions of a moody Gryffindor.”

 

Lily playfully smacked his shoulder. “Hush. I can distinctly recall you being rather moody a time or two. Regardless, how would that look? Neither of us present tonight? You know as well as I do how much Hogwarts students love to gossip.”

 

“Yes. All too well." Standing, Severus helped Lily to her feet. "The sooner we go, the sooner tonight's detention will be done, and I can return here."

 

“Detention? Already? Is that a record?”

 

“Yes. Young Weasley has outdone his twin brothers. I assigned him detention for pulling his wand and threatening another student.”

 

She must have read something in his expression because she stopped him before he reached the door, her eyes narrowed. “Who did Weasley threaten, and what did he say?”

 

Severus instantly regretted mentioning exactly who had received detention this soon. Lily had a protective streak a mile wide. He should know; he had been on the receiving end of it many times during their Hogwarts days. Despite how he felt about the Weasley family – the twins and the youngest male especially – he had no desire to alter Lily's perception of them, particularly the Weasley matriarch since she and Lily appeared to get on well.

 

“Severus Snape, so help me, if you don't start talking right now – ”

 

“I believe you have already figured out the who. As to what was said, it was nothing malicious. I merely sought to remind Mr. Weasley that his behavior would not be tolerated.”

 

Lily huffed, then looked resigned. “You're not going to tell me what he said, are you?”

 

“No, I am not. Suffice it to say, it is being dealt with.”

 

“Fine. Just know, if _I_ hear him threaten my son, I will set him straight, even if I have to go to Molly to do so."

 

A half-smile curved the corner of Severus' mouth. “How very Slytherin of you, Lils. However, you may find Molly already aware of her son's newest record.”

 

Lily's eyes narrowed again as she studied him. “You sent her a letter, didn't you?”

 

Severus, enjoying winding Lily up, merely shrugged. “Perhaps.”

 

“Don't toy with me, Severus. Did you write to her? What did you tell her?”

 

“She was informed of Mr. Weasley's witnessed altercation with another student. That is all. Molly Weasley did not strike me as the type to accept that behavior. Perhaps a few words from her will be enough to curb the boy's attitude." As the two of them exited, and Severus warded the door, another thought occurred to him that had him pausing. "I only hope there are no unforeseen ramifications from my action. Harry has suffered enough.”

 

One of Lily's hands slid into his left, lacing their fingers together and squeezing lightly. Her other hand wrapped around his arm just above his elbow. Something about the double gesture had always comforted Severus, and it didn't fail to do so this time, either. He covered the hand at his elbow with his free one, giving it a gentle caress with his thumb, enjoying the small display of affection despite the chance of being seen. He would, of course, have to let her go once they reached the Entrance Hall.

 

“I've heard some of the things the kids have said about him.” Lily's voice was soft but easily heard in the stone corridor. “I just hope _he_ hasn't heard anything too terrible. This morning, at breakfast, I saw you pull your wand. What happened?”

 

“Harry claimed to have fallen. Some large scrapes cut across both of his palms.”

 

“ _Claimed_? Do you think he wasn't telling the truth?”

 

“I do not know. However, I am not too confident it was an accident.”

 

Gasping, Lily whirled to face him, the hand at his elbow now clutched the opposite one, eyes wide. “Do you think he was pushed? Has someone resorted to violence against him?”

 

“I cannot say, Lils. Unless he speaks to us about it, I have proof of nothing.”

 

“I never would have thought it would go that far.”

 

Dampness in her eyes caught the flickering light from the wall sconces, and it tore at Severus' heart. He had never intended to make her cry. With a glance around them to be sure of their privacy, he gathered her against his chest, dropping a kiss to her temple, breathing in the familiar raspberry scent that she somehow always had. Her arms snaked around his waist and held him tightly. Severus quietly gave her the time she needed to compose herself, gently combing a hand through her silky hair, though he couldn't help wondering if she regretted coming back. A lump formed in his throat at the thought, his own eyes growing wet, and he had to swallow twice to clear them. Dropping his head to hers, he buried his nose in her hair, closing his eyes. It would kill him to know she felt that way.

 

“I don't, you know.”

 

“What?" It came out rather scratchy, so Severus cleared his throat and tried again. "You don't what?"

 

Lily leaned back just enough to look up at him. "You think I don't know what's running around in your head right now? I've learned to read all the signals you give off. You may think you conceal your thoughts and emotions well – and maybe that's true with everyone else – but I learned to read everything you don't say. The sudden tension. Trembling hands. The double swallow. The slight hitch in your breath. It was easy for me to figure out exactly what you were thinking. I don't regret returning to Britain and enrolling Harry here. I have you back in my life. Harry has his father. How could I regret that?"

 

Severus could only stare at her, speechless. He had no idea his body language betrayed him, or that she was that accustomed to looking for it in regards to him. All those years, he had thought he had hidden himself well, but apparently, he had not. She had read him as if he had been an open book. If she could, then, could others? Had the joke been on him all this time? If he had been so unskilled at concealing his real thoughts and feelings, how had he even survived in the Dark Lord's presence? He should have died a long time ago.

 

“Sev? Don't worry. You're quite in control of yourself around everyone else.”

 

Focusing on Lily's beautiful face, Severus offered her the remnants of a smile. “All of this time, I had assumed you had some innate Legilmency skills. It annoyed me that you knew my every thought – but I will admit, it was a relief as well. There were times I could not verbalize what I felt, but you still understood.”

 

Resting her chin on his chest, she grinned as she looked up at him. “Well, I don't know _everything_ you think or feel, but I can make educated guesses most of the time, especially when you're particularly emotional.”

 

“It is good to know I still have _some_ privacy.”

 

Lily rolled her eyes at his sarcasm before planting a light kiss on his lips. "Come on. We're going to be late for dinner."

 

Happy to have Lily in a better mood, even if it took some uncomfortable realizations on his part to do it, Severus agreed, heading up the dungeon stairs, careful to keep his hands from wandering to her, neither of them aware there had been a witness to their initial embrace, their conversation, and their kiss.

 

SSLE

 

Lily nervously made her way down to Hogsmeade to meet with Andromeda Tonks. The Potters and the Blacks had been distantly related so when Andromeda Black married Muggle-born Ted Tonks and was disowned by her family, James' parents had befriended them. Once James matured, and he and she became good friends, Lily had met them many times. She had even minded Dora during the summer on occasion. Because of that, she had become close to them. Lily knew Andromeda had cared for James; Andromeda and Ted had acted as James' surrogate parents, or maybe older brother and sister was a better way of putting it when his own had passed. Lily had been too afraid of Andromeda's judgment of her once everything had come out in the Daily Prophet a month ago even to contemplate contacting her.

 

Now, after a brief letter from the woman requesting to meet, Lily found herself complying with the request, if only to get the lecture and what would likely be harsh words thrown at her over .with. She had told Severus what she was doing and – Merlin, she loved that man – he had offered to accompany her in spite of Andromeda's connection to Sirius Black. This was something she felt she needed to do on her own, to face the consequences of her actions.

 

When she stepped inside The Three Broomsticks, the barmaid Rosmerta motioned her toward a private room in the back. Hyper-aware of the looks tossed her way, Lily made her way across the large room, weaving her way through the tables. Arriving at the doorway of the private room, Lily took a deep, settling breath and let it out slowly before stepping through it. Andromeda sat at a table, idly tapping her fingers on its surface. The woman, Lily knew, was only nine years older than she was, making her forty years of age now. She still wore her wavy, light brown hair down around her shoulders as she used to. Lily had always admired her patrician beauty and grace.

 

“Lily! I'm so upset with you! Get in here and explain to me why you haven't bothered to contact me!”

 

Feeling like a child chastised for being naughty, Lily ducked her head. A part of her had hoped Andromeda would hear her out, but apparently, that wasn't to be the case. Disappointment threatened to drown her but fought it as she did with every other major disappointment she had faced. A light touch on her arm startled her into looking up into Andromeda's warm brown eyes.

 

“Lily? Talk to me. I thought we were friends.”

 

“You still want to be friends?”

 

“Of course I do! Come sit down. Why wouldn't I still want to be friends?”

 

Sniffing back her tears, Lily sat across from Andromeda, allowing the older woman to take her hands. “Well, I know how much you loved James, and now he's gone because of me. And now that the truth is out, you know I never felt more for him than as a close friend. He could have chosen anyone else and probably would still be alive today, his family name living on.”

 

The hands holding hers tightened. "Wait a second. You were afraid I would hate you, weren't you?" At Lily's nod, she stood, circled the table and gathered Lily into her arms. "Oh, Merlin, I couldn't hate you! You were in an impossible position! The man you loved had gone Dark. You were pregnant and couldn't tell him. I don't blame you a bit for accepting James' proposal."

 

“You don't? Even though it was, by the strictest of definitions, a loveless marriage? Not once did he ever, er, ask that I …”

 

“Of course he didn't. He knew your heart belonged elsewhere. To you, it would have been a betrayal to your love, even if the man had turned away from you.”

 

“How do you know that?”

 

Andromeda smiled. “He told me. After you had told him of your pregnancy, he came to me with the thought of helping you by proposing and wanted my opinion. He feared the repercussions you and the child would face if you weren't married and gave birth, especially if it came out his father was a Death Eater.” Andromeda looked away a moment, seeming to think on something, before returning her gaze to Lily. “James felt it was the least he could do considering how he had treated Severus when he was younger. He felt if he cared for the child while Severus could not, then it would help atone for the things he did and said.”

 

Tears welled up in Lily's eyes and spilled unchecked down her cheeks. She felt incredibly guilty for trapping such a wonderful man into a sham of a marriage. James deserved to have a child or more of his own. How different things could have been. If only she hadn't accepted James' offer. He could have had a child starting school with Harry. Perhaps they could have been friends.

 

“Don't cry, Lily. There's no reason to feel guilty. James wanted to help you. He didn't regret a moment spent with either of you.”

 

“ _That_ night, he told me to run, to take Harry and go. He died trying to protect us. Why didn't I die, too, Andromeda? I should have. The Killing Curse was used. I _should have_ died that night. Actually, I did, I think. I remember watching that beam of light coming at me, then hitting me, and suddenly it was dark as night, with no sound, as if everything had been muted. And cold. I remember being cold. But then, it all returned. I hurt, but I could hear Harry crying for me and knew he needed me. Voldemort was gone. The house was a wreck, and poor Harry sat in his cot, bleeding from a jagged cut on his forehead. Panicking, I grabbed everything I thought was necessary and ran. I don't understand what happened that night and I still don't.”

 

“I don't know either, but it sounds to me as if someone, somehow, intervened on your behalf. Maybe that someone knew Harry needed you. Maybe that person thought Harry wasn't the only person who did. I think you and Severus were given another chance, and I'm glad that, from what I've read, you two are grabbing hold of that chance with both hands. Ignore all the mean-spirited people out there. You and Severus deserve to be together. You've spent enough time apart. Besides, Harry needs his father.”

 

Lily hugged her friend tightly. “Thank you. Thank you for saying all of that. You should come up to the school and meet Harry.”

 

“I'd like that. I'm not so certain Severus would be too happy to see me, though.”

 

Lily chuckled. “Believe it or not, he actually offered to come here with me. He's still bothered by the things Sirius and James did to him, but he's come to forgive James.”

 

Andromeda elbowed Lily playfully. “See? You've been a good influence on him already. I have to say, while Dora was at school, he wasn't exactly … nice.”

 

“Yeah, I'm well aware of his reputation and am trying to change it. I think it's working, too, because I've heard some of my students say that they're learning something in Potions class now, and that he hasn't insulted anyone like he used to."

 

With a broad grin, Andromeda said, “I say again. See? He's needed you too.” She snickered. “I can only imagine his expression when he realized Harry was his and not James'.”

 

Lily laughed heartily. “Speechless. He was speechless, and I'm sure you know from what Dora has told you about him how rare that is.”

 

Andromeda nodded. “Very rare. I have been witness to his sharp tongue a time or two in Diagon Alley. I could never understand why Albus kept him at Hogwarts, but now, I know why. He was waiting for your return.”

 

“Sev confided in me that he didn't know how to be a good father. You know where I found the two of them the very next morning? I found them in Sev's personal lab, with him patiently teaching Harry some of the potions he was working on, answering all of Harry's questions.” She shook her head and laughed. “He may not think he knows how, but he's doing splendidly.” Standing, Lily grabbed Andromeda's hand. “Come up to Hogwarts. Meet Harry. Maybe one day, Dora and Harry could meet.”

 

“I knew there had to be a heart in there somewhere. Sometimes it doesn't matter what role models we had. I'd love to come up to the school, and it would be nice if Dora and Harry could meet. Dora's in Auror training now, though, so I don't think she's going have much free time.”

 

“An Auror?” Lily grinned. “Has she outgrown that clumsiness of hers?”

 

Andromeda grinned. “Well, no, but she's trying anyway. We'll see how it goes.”

 

“Wow, I can't believe she's even old enough to be out of school, but good for her.”

 

Andromeda pretended to wipe away a tear. “I know. My baby's all grown up. Anyway, are you sure Albus won't mind me showing up?”

 

“I'm sure. It was his suggestion to invite you back here. We can have lunch in the kitchens while everyone else is in the Great Hall.”

 

“Oh, I don't want to take you away from anything.”

 

“Nonsense. One meal won't hurt.” Lily snorted and rolled her eyes. “The Hogwarts rumor mill won't be sawing away if only one of us is missing from a meal. Now, if both Sev _and_ I were absent, then that would be different.”

 

“Oh, yes, the gossip machine is forever running at school.”

 

The two friends left the pub and took the familiar route up to the school, Lily telling Andromeda of where she had been for the past ten years and of selling potions and salves to make money.

 

SSLE

 

Severus impatiently waited for the Headmaster to finish his little speech. He had told Harry to go ahead to the Quidditch pitch, that he would be along in a minute or two to supervise while Harry flew. The Headmaster had already taken more than that much of his time.

 

“Yes, I will make the necessary change, Headmaster. I must go.”

 

“Yes, yes, of course, my boy.”

 

The Headmaster's blue eyes twinkled in amusement and, for some reason he could not name, it grated on his nerves. Giving the man a slight nod, Severus took his leave, heading out of the castle. While he didn't derive the same pleasure from flying that his son did, he didn't mind watching. He would not say no to joining his son, either, if he were ever to ask. Lily was the one who preferred to keep her feet firmly planted on the ground.

 

As he entered the pitch, his steps faltered when he noticed Lily had returned with Andromeda Tonks. Apparently, the meeting had gone better than Lily had anticipated, which pleased him. Severus knew her old friends had been lost in the war, save for Sirius Black and Remus Lupin, and one of those was in Azkaban for betraying James, Lily, and Harry to the Dark Lord. As for the wolf, Severus did not have pleasant feelings for him, but if Lily wanted him around, he would tolerate the man's presence. Severus wondered if Lily had been in contact with Lupin at all since she had returned and, if not, if the reason was him.

 

Severus thought perhaps he should retreat and allow Lily to speak with Harry and Andromeda, however retreating felt too much like a coward's way, and he may be many things but a coward wasn't one of them. At any rate, Harry noticed him and pointed in his direction. Lily and Andromeda turned his way. Reminding himself Andromeda Tonks was _not_ Sirius Black, nor her sister Bellatrix Lestrange, he approached the three of them, hands clasped behind his back.

 

Lily's hands went to her hips, and Severus knew that was never a good thing. "Severus, why is Harry out here, with a broom, alone? I thought we agreed one of us would be with him whenever he wanted to fly."

 

“Mum! I'm perfectly capable of flying by myself. You know that.”

 

Severus silently admired his son's audacity in the face of Lily's irritation. She ignored him, and Severus decided to do the same temporarily, if only to save his own hide from Lily's wrath. Lifting his chin a notch, he gave her a raised brow. "One does not say no to the Headmaster when he wishes to have a chat. However, if, in future, you are ever asked for an audience when there is somewhere you need to be, I do hope I am present when you refuse him."

 

Harry let out a snort, drawing Severus' gaze. His lips twitched upward slightly before he returned his gaze to Lily, brow still raised, awaiting her next comment. Andromeda, he had noticed, had covered her grin with a hand.

 

“Well, in that case, I guess, er … Harry, go flying.” Once he had taken to the air, Lily turned back to the others. “Andromeda, meet Severus. Sev, this is Andromeda, as I'm sure you had already guessed.”

 

Severus gave the woman a nod. “Yes, I had assumed. With Bellatrix currently in Azkaban, I knew it could not be her.”

 

Lily, mouth agape, backhanded his stomach. “Severus! That was tactless! Then again, I shouldn't be surprised. Tact was never your strong suit.”

 

Andromeda laughed heartily. “It's fine, Lily. I know Bella and I look very similar. Do you think I haven't heard the comparison before?”

 

“Still. That doesn't make it okay to say it.”

 

Severus would never admit it, but Lily had a wicked swing. He wanted to rub the soreness from his abdomen but didn't want her smirking at him, all but gloating, which she was not above doing. Hoping to get the focus off himself, Severus withdrew a small golden ball from inside his jacket pocket. For a long time, he had despised that little ball for what it represented: the moment that the offensive word he had forced himself to call Lily had occurred, supposedly putting an end to their friendship. Lily had said Harry had a talent for Seeking, so Severus was willing to create new memories involving the winged ball.

 

Harry zoomed by on the school broom, whipping Severus' robe in the wash of air. Severus had to admit, his son sat a broom quite well. Where the talent came from, Severus hadn't a clue. Stepping away from the witches, he looked down at the walnut-sized ball in his hand before searching for Harry. He waited for his son to make the long loop around the pitch again. When Severus thought him close enough, he let the Snitch loose with a toss of his hand, and watched as it instantly caught Harry's attention.

 

“I didn't think I'd ever see you handle a Snitch.”

 

Lily's soft comment had Severus turning in her direction. He could see in her eyes the same thoughts that had gone through his head. Unwilling to say much in front of Andromeda, he shrugged. "It was time to exorcize the past in this instance."

 

When Lily began filling Andromeda in on what his statement meant, Severus stepped away, his eyes on Harry's chase of the Snitch. Within a minute, Harry's arm rose in triumph. Severus shook his head in amazement, pride lighting his face. Harry brought the Snitch back to him, grinning madly. Severus had been unable to express his pride during class; he was not going to allow this opportunity to slip by.

 

“Well done. The Seeker position is, indeed, a good match for you.”

 

“Thanks, Dad. It's a challenge, but fun. Will you throw it again? It's great practice for when I get to play on a House team.”

 

Up went one of Severus' brows. He had no idea the boy had even considered it. “For which House would you be playing?”

 

“Well, there's nothing in the rules that says I can't play for both Houses. I could play Seeker for one team one game, and then, switch for the next."

 

“And when Gryffindor and Slytherin play each other?”

 

Harry grinned sheepishly. “Well, I haven't completely figured it out yet.”

 

“Ah. And do you think it fair for two teams to have you and your obvious skill? Would that not give Gryffindor and Slytherin an unfair advantage over Ravenclaw and Hufflepuff?”

 

“Not necessarily. Both of those teams' Seekers have more experience.” Harry shrugged. “I don't know. It was just a thought.”

 

“Do not think I am discouraging you, Harry, for I am not. I am merely attempting to help you look at all the angles, to clear all the obstacles before you take your idea to the Headmaster.”

 

Harry's eyes rounded and his voice held a nervous waver in it as he asked, “You want me to speak to Professor Dumbledore?”

 

“You wish to play. It is your idea. Therefore, it is your responsibility to speak to him when you are ready. Until then …” Severus motioned for Harry to take off again and threw the Snitch.

 

“Do you play, Severus?”

 

“No. I do not mind flying, but organized sports hold no real interest for me.”

 

“Well, there must be someone in your background who played because that boy is a natural. And before you say anything, talent like that is inherited, not taught.”

 

Severus closed his mouth. He _had_ been about to mention James having plenty of opportunities to introduce Quidditch to Harry and teach him things, no matter the fact Harry had been too young to remember them consciously. He could be acting subconsciously. Ultimately, Severus realized, it mattered not from where the talent came. He still desired to nurture his son's skill.

 

“Perhaps the opportunity for him to play will present itself one day.”

 

For a few minutes, there was only the sound of Harry flying by their position on his hunt for the Snitch. To Severus' shock, Andromeda cleared her throat and turned in his direction. "I feel I must apologize for the unforgivable things Sirius did to you when the two of you were younger. If I had known, I would have set him straight in a flash. James, too, regretted his actions."

 

Tension had every muscle Severus possessed tightening with sudden discomfort. Sirius Black was the last person he wanted to discuss. He may have forgiven James, but that stemmed from the fact James had saved his life and then lost his own trying to protect Lily and Harry when the Dark Lord had attacked. The man had cared for Harry as if Harry had been his. How could Severus continue to hold a grudge after that?

 

“Apologies are not needed from you, Andromeda.”

 

“I know. You need to hear them from Sirius, but I'm offering them all the same."

 

“Your sentiments are … appreciated.”

 

It was the best Severus could do. He didn't think he could ever forgive the man. The threat on his life, a threat that Black had considered to be a great prank, was absolutely heinous. Looking back on his Hogwarts days, Severus could understand that Black had been the driving force behind James' actions. That wasn't to say James did not do the things on his own, but more often than not, those actions had been to amuse Black.

 

Andromeda appeared to understand he couldn't offer more than that, her gratitude for that much allowing Severus to ease the tension in his body and return to watching his son zip across the pitch after a tiny golden ball that Severus could not see. He almost wished he wasn't watching when Harry appeared to overreach and pitched forward, tumbling from his broom and hitting the ground with a solid thud, rolling a couple of times.

 

“Harry!”

 

Severus was in motion before Lily had finished screaming Harry's name. Reaching him before the others, Severus knelt beside him. “Are you hurt?”

 

“I don't think so.” Harry held up the wiggling, golden ball, grinning. “I got it.”

 

Severus pulled his wand from his sleeve and performed a cursory inspection for any significant injuries. Finding none, he replaced his wand and assisted Harry in getting to his feet. "So you did. Perhaps it would be wiser to do so _without_ the dramatics the next time.”

 

“Harry, are you okay, sweetheart?”

 

“I'm fine, Mum. A little bruised maybe but otherwise, I'm okay."

 

“Thank Merlin. Alright, that's it. No more flying today.”

 

“Oh, come on, Mum! I could get worse than that playing Quidditch!”

 

“But you're not playing Quidditch, are you?”

 

“Well, not this year, but I might next year.”

 

“And how do you figure that? Which House team would you play for?”

 

“Both? I don't have it all figured it out yet.”

 

Figuring he could change the subject before Lily made a big issue out of it all, Severus laid his hand at the back of Harry's neck. “We should get those bruises healed. Then, perhaps, you should try to find Mr. Longbottom. He should have finished his essays by now. It will be time for lunch soon.”

 

“Alright.”

 

“Lily, we will see you later. Andromeda.”

 

Retrieving the school broom Harry had been using, Severus led Harry off the pitch, returned the broom to the broom shed, then took his son up to the castle for some bruise balm.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 


	6. Knowledge of One's Self

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Happy Valentine's Day (early)! *waggles brows for the beginning of this chapter* So sorry it's taken so long. I haven't done much writing since I've been busy with work and working on my Snape diamond painting. If you don't know what that is, it's like color by number but using tiny faceted beads on a canvas to "color" with. They're all sparkly like diamonds, hence the name. I can just picture Sev's lip curled in distaste at being sparkly but he'll just get over it. LOL. I have another of Sev and his patronus to do after this one so my writing may be slow for a while, but have no fear that I have quit writing. I have not.

**_Confidence is knowing who you are and not changing it a bit because of someone’s version of reality is not your version of reality._ **

**_\-- Shannon L Alder_ **

 

Lily wandered the library looking for the books on Muggles that she had expected to find.  She had thought to maybe assign some books for required reading, but first had to see exactly what was available – not to mention how old the books were.  It would do no good to assign books that were out-of-date. Concentrating as she was on looking over the available books, it took several minutes for the hushed voices to penetrate her mind.  Once they did, she peeked through the books on the shelf to find three upper year Ravenclaw girls – and surprisingly two Slytherin girls – chatting.

 

“Professor Snape?” one of the Ravenclaw girls asked with scrunched expression. 

 

“Oh, yes,” the dark-haired Slytherin girl said with a nod, practically purring.  “You saw him this past week. He wasn't wearing that jacket in class, his sleeves rolled up just above his wrists, and his hair pulled out of his face.”  The girl dropped her elbow onto the table, her head supported by her hand and sighed dreamily. “Who knew that trim yet muscled body was hiding under that jacket?  And the way his cheekbones stood out …  _ Damn _ .”

 

Lily bit her lip to keep from snickering, despite her surprise to come across students discussing their professor in this way, especially that professor being Sev.  Casting a quiet charm to not be noticed, she settled in to hear just what else the girl would say, knowing Sev would be absolutely mortified to know the impression he had made.

 

“Muscled?  Just how do you know that?  His shirt wasn't exactly form-fitting.”

 

“Maybe not, but when he had to create that wind to clear the air from that disastrously made potion, it plastered his shirt to his chest.  I mean, obviously, he's not muscle-bound or anything even close to it, but for his build, there's just enough to make your mouth water.”

 

The girl that had initially wrinkled her nose at her friend's revelation tilted her head to the side, apparently giving it some thought.  “Well, he  _ has  _ seemed to mellow this year.  He didn't take points from any of us and actually gave us tips to help us improve our potions.”

 

The dark-haired girl nodded at her blonde friend.  “Exactly. He moves with such grace, and those long fingers of his are one of my obsessions.  That silky voice that can either cut or caress just gives me chills. I could listen to him all day.  And those eyes …”

 

One of the girls shuddered.  “How can you like his eyes? They're like a shark's.  Dark, soulless, and unfeeling.”

 

The vocal girl shook her head vigorously.  “They're not soulless or unfeeling. You're just not looking closely enough.  There's so much emotion in them, just buried deeply. But the muscles … I bet he gained those a long time ago.  What I wouldn't give to feel them, to run my hand over his chest. He's so reserved and formal in public, I bet he's the complete opposite in private.  Merlin, could you imagine being the one to loosen him up? Damn, I bet it's a sight.”

 

Lily felt her cheeks suddenly heat, a need uncurling in her belly, quickening her pulse and her breathing.   _ Yes,  _ she thought as a mental image of Severus last night popped into her mind's eye,  _ it's a glorious sight, indeed. _

 

“I never knew you harbored such thoughts for him.  He's always been a git to everyone, absolutely awful.”

 

The girl shrugged.  “There's always been that mystery, a haunting, lonely darkness about him.”  She gave her friends a salacious grin that seemed out of place on a girl of sixteen or seventeen, wiggling her brows.  “I figured someone as tightly wound as he seemed to be could do with a little …  _ un _ winding.”

 

“Well, you can stop thinking about him because he'd never look twice at a student.  Besides, he already has someone to help  _ loosen him up _ , as you put it.  Not only that, he has a son not much younger than you.”

 

The other girl shrugged, not bothered in the least by what her friend pointed out.  “It's called  _ fantasizing  _ for a reason.”

 

The third Ravenclaw girl, who had been quiet this entire time, her eyes wide as if she couldn't believe what it was she was hearing, finally spoke up.  “Do you really think that he … that Mrs. Potter … that they …  _ are _ ?”

 

The fantasizing girl rolled her eyes.  “You can believe it. There's no way that they're not.  I mean, from what I've seen, she must be staying in his quarters.  They arrive at breakfast and dinner together, at any rate.” She sighed.  “I'm so jealous. She's absolutely lucky to be able to lay her hands on him, to feel those lips on her, to have those gorgeous, capable hands skimming over her.  I wonder how … vocal … he is while in the moment.”

 

Again, the previous night played before Lily's eyes and she grinned.   _ Certainly not as quiet as when Harry had been just down the corridor.   _ An overwhelming desire washed over her and she withdrew from the stacks, leaving behind the books, only one objective now on her mind.  Impatiently, she stopped when her students asked for clarifications on her assignments. Why was it now, of all times, that her students seemed to be everywhere and had to stop her when all she wanted was to get to Sev?  It did embarrass her a bit that she had become so worked up over listening to those girls talk, but that didn't keep her from seeking out the object of their discussion. Lily seriously hoped he wasn't stuck in detention.  She would not be held accountable for her actions if he was.

 

Practically dashing into their quarters, relief filled her as the sight of his teaching jacket draped over the sofa back met her gaze and the faint clink of glass from the lab reached her ears.  Luckily for her, he wasn't working on anything, merely tidying up. Stepping up behind him, Lily wrapped her arms around his waist, one hand sliding upward over his chest, the other slipping in the opposite direction, fingers momentarily dipping into his waistband, earning her a quick intake of breath from him.  She buried her nose between his shoulder blades and inhaled the mix of herbal scents that always clung to him.

 

“Lily?”  

 

Oh yes, that voice could definitely caress, like satin over skin.  He turned in her arms and Lily pounced, capturing his lips in a desperate, demanding kiss.  Her palms tracing every contour that had been mentioned earlier, she walked him backward until he hit the wall.  If she hadn't been so needy, she would have sensed his surprise and mild puzzlement and would have been amused by it.  As it was, she merely moaned when he buried a hand in her hair, other arm snaking around her waist to pull her closer, and actively returned the kiss.  Without missing a beat, Lily pulled his shirttail from his trousers and slipped her hands under it to fully appreciate the planes of his chest, reveling in the shudder that ran through him along with a moan of pleasure deep in his throat.

 

Lily's fingers made quick work of the buttons of his shirt, then headed southward, finding him more than ready for what she had in mind.  That knowledge only served to intensify her desire. She pulled her lips from his to work her way along his jaw to his ear, nipping and licking as she went.  

 

“I need you.  Now.”

 

Suddenly, Lily found their positions reversed, Severus' hands quickly divesting her of her clothing, tossing the articles carelessly aside.  His kisses slid down her neck, then back up to that sensitive spot behind her ear, the one that always sent chills down her spine, causing her breath to catch.  His calloused fingers skimmed over her, touching everywhere he could reach. Pressing against him, she realized there were still barriers keeping her from what she needed.  Her hands shook so badly, she fumbled with his belt – so much so that he had to come to her aid. She'd barely touched him skin-to-skin when he let out a strangled gasp and shoved her hand away.  Frustrated, Lily whimpered in complaint.

 

His arms tightened around her hips and she felt herself being lifted, those arms then sliding upward to protect her from the rough stone wall, hands burying themselves in her hair.  Teeth nibbled her earlobe, Severus' quick breaths feathering across her ear and cheek sending shudders down her spine and rocketing her need into urgency. Sliding her hands up Severus' back, Lily grabbed his shoulders, nails leaving half-moon circles in his skin, and wrapped her legs around his waist, rubbing intimately against him with a pleading whimper that quickly turned to a gasping moan when he complied with her demand.  Frenzied movements and feverish kisses coiled the tension inside tighter and tighter until pleasure erupted within her so intensely that she could only gasp Severus' name, vaguely aware of his knees buckling when he followed her into the tide.

 

It took several minutes of breath-catching before either could speak and it was Severus who managed to do so first, in-between breaths.  “Damn, Lils. That was … unexpected. Not … complaining, but … what inspired … that?”

 

Lily giggled, or tried to as she worked to recover her breath, giddy with the knowledge he'd been affected to the point he'd fallen to his knees.  “You … probably … don't want … to know.” Severus' brow furrowed in such obvious confusion and wariness as he looked down at her that she giggled again.  “Let's just say … that you've made … quite the impression on some … of the older girls.” 

 

His expression didn't waver for a full minute as he attempted to puzzle out her meaning.  She knew the second it clicked. Color flooded his cheeks and he groaned, burying his face into her shoulder, making her laugh and pull him closer.  She shouldn't laugh; however, she couldn't help but find the situation rather humorous. Poor Sev. He couldn't win. He went from being talked about, albeit negatively, to, well, being talked about in a way that was the polar opposite.

 

Cheeky grin in place, she kissed his temple.  Several moments later, she asked,  “Should I be concerned? I certainly couldn't compete with someone so young.”  Lily chuckled at the revolted shudder and noise of distaste that was his response, running a hand through his sweat-dampened hair.

 

Lifting his head to drop a kiss to Lily's lips, Severus rested his forehead against hers, staring into the bright green eyes he'd loved forever.  “You give me everything I could ever want.” With a little smirk, he added, “In fact, one of my fantasies just came true, though it was slightly different in my head.”

 

Lily, intrigued, buried both hands into Severus' hair, gently tugging to pull him back a little in order to look him in the eye better.  “Oh?” Oh, she wished for the hundredth time, she could do the eyebrow trick. She absolutely  _ had  _ to learn how to do it.  “You fantasized about us being intimate in the lab?”   Her expression turned sly.  “Well, if I'd known that, we could have crossed that one off your list a long time ago.”  She tilted her head as she studied him. “Exactly how  _ did  _ you picture it in your head?  You know,” she wiggled her brows, “for next time.”

 

Severus softly chuckled.  “Well, there may have been a table involved.  The image of you surrounded by potion bottles has kept me awake many a night from the time I was …”  His cheeks reddened again.

 

“Yes?” Lily asked, drawing out the word, highly amused.  “You can't keep it to yourself now. Just how long  _ have  _ you had such impure thoughts about me, Sev?”

 

Severus momentarily looked uncomfortable before sighing with a roll of his eyes.  “I was fifteen and, like any normal teen, ruled by my hormones.”

 

Surprise blossomed in Lily's chest.  How was it she had never noticed? That was a question she had asked herself many times when she and Sev had begun dating.  He'd told her that he'd loved her for a while but, somehow, it had never come up just how long he had been interested in her.  “You never let it show.”

 

One of his brows lifted.  “That surprises you? You did not share my feelings.  I was not willing to jeopardize our friendship.”

 

“Hmm.  Well, now that I know about this potentially entertaining fantasy of yours, we'll have to see it through.  Any other fantasies that you care to share?”

 

Severus smirked, but shook his head.  “You will hear no more of mine until I hear one of yours.”

 

With a teasing grin, Lily said, “What if I don't have any?”

 

She could see that caught him off-guard as he leaned back a little to study her, a tiny furrow in his brow.  Though she knew he would never use his Legilimancy on her, not intentionally, she still pictured the field at the playpark in which they used to play.  She imagined a warm summer evening, the tall-ish grass swaying in a light breeze, bringing with it the scent of various flowers. The sun was just about to set in her most cherished fantasy, and they watched it slowly disappear before, under the light of the stars, cementing the relationship that had begun there so many years previously.

 

Severus' eyes widened with a sharp intake of breath.  “You would want to return there?”

 

Shocked, Lily's own eyes rounded.  “You saw that?”

 

“I did.  I did not intend to invade your thoughts, however.  Occasionally, if one is utterly focused on something, it is easy to pick up without making an attempt.”

 

“Don't worry.  I wanted you to see it.”  Lily flashed him a cheeky grin.  “Now you know one of mine.”

 

“Indeed.”  Severus answered her grin with a grin of his own, his containing a hint of smugness and heavy dashes of satisfaction and joy.  “That is one is I would thoroughly enjoy making a reality.”

 

Loving having put that particular expression on his face, Lily lightly kissed him.  “I look forward to it.” They remained, heads close together, enjoying the closeness, for a few minutes before something occurred to Lily that had her eyes popping open and all of her muscles tensing.  “Sev, what time is it?”

 

Severus' expression mirrored hers.  “Oh, damn.” Standing, he slowly released her to slide to her feet.  He reached into his pocket for his watch – and grimaced. “Dinner is nearly over.”  Raking a hand over his face, he let out a little groan. “Best to avoid it altogether and have the house-elves bring us something here.”

 

Lily agreed that was their best course of action as she donned her clothes.  She certainly hadn't intended to miss the meal. That was sure to set off the chatter among the students, not that her and Sev's relationship weren't already the talk of the school, obviously.  She'd just been so worked up she'd been unable to think of anything else, like how close it was to the dinner hour. It had been so unprofessional of her. She hoped they weren't reprimanded for their lack of decorum.  

 

Something of her thoughts must have shown in her expression because Severus, clothes back in order, cupped her cheek, leaning in to gently kiss her.  “Relax, Lils.”

 

“We shouldn't have.  I shouldn't have started it.  I knew dinnertime was getting close.”

 

“As did I.”  Severus placed a light kiss to the tip of her nose.  “I rather prefer how we spent the time.”

 

Feeling a little better, Lily offered up an appreciative smile.  Turning to exit the lab, she realized something that nearly had her cringing.  She hadn't bothered shutting the door. If she had, and if Harry had come looking for one of them, he would have known not to come in.  He had learned the hard way not to open the closed lab door one day during the summer when he had stumbled upon her and Sev paying way more attention to each other than either of the potions they were supposedly brewing.  Luckily, they had only been snogging, with hands in places where hands weren't normally. Heat flooded her face at the sight that would have met his too-young eyes if he had come by earlier.

 

“Oh, Merlin, I didn't close the door.  I hope Harry hadn't come looking for us.”

 

Severus made a noise in his throat, using his thumb and forefinger to rub his eyes.  “Well, he would have received an education. Educating is Hogwarts' purpose.”

 

Upon hearing his wry comment, Lily looked up at him, noting the color staining his cheeks, and had to purse her lips to keep from laughing at their situation.  Severus met her gaze, his own lips twitching, and that was all it took for both of them to lose their composure as they walked into the sitting area. After receiving their dinners, they sat at their table, Lily sitting across from Severus, and dug in.  She had just taken a sip of her tea when she nearly spewed it across the table at Severus' question, his discomfort so absolute that she felt like giggling.

 

“They are truly gossiping about me?”

 

Lily took pity on him, taking his free hand into hers, threading their fingers together.  “Don't worry about it, Sev. They're impressionable young girls. You've changed from how they knew you, so it's going to catch their attention.”

 

Severus rubbed his forehead as if the action would dislodge some idea of what to do.  “But I have no experience with this. What do I do? How do I handle this? How do I look at any of them?  How do I act? How do I keep their minds on their tasks?”

 

It was just too adorable to see one of the most self-assured men she knew flounder just a bit.  “Use your skills to lock away what I've told you and continue on. Rule your classroom as you've always done.  Demand nothing less than excellence from any of them.” Lily cheekily grinned at him. “That will redirect their focus soon enough.”

 

Severus scowled at her.  “This is no laughing matter.”

 

“Actually, Sev, it sort of is.”

 

“Then I look forward to the moment when you find yourself on  _ my  _ side of things.  We shall see how amusing you find it.”

 

To Lily, he almost sounded petulant, though she'd never tell him that.  No, she would just needle him a little instead. “To be honest, I'd take it as a compliment.  You have no idea what a boost to the female ego it is to know that someone young like that finds you attractive.”

 

Severus eyed her closely, his head slightly tilted to the side.  “You need not fear ever being found less-than-desirable. For the majority of my life, I have wanted you in one manner or another.  I do not foresee that changing.”

 

Emotion flooded Lily, bringing tears to her eyes, at Severus' frankness.  Even when they had been together when they were young, he hadn't explicitly spoken of his feelings, not very often.  She wondered if his experiences during the war and their absence from each other had been the catalyst for the loosening of Severus' tongue.

 

“That was an amazingly touching thing to say.  Years ago, you wouldn't have said something like that.”

 

“I was foolish and took your presence in my life for granted.  That is one mistake I shall not make again.”

 

They finished their meal in companionable silence and had just begun enjoying their evening, sitting together on the sofa, Severus gently toying with Lily's hair, quietly discussing their days when the Floo activated, Dumbledore's head appearing in the green flames.  “Severus? Lily? Please come up to my office at your earliest convenience.”

 

Lily licked her lips, fearing she knew exactly why they were being called up to the Headmaster's office like two naughty children.  Severus informed the man they would be up in a few minutes. She bit her lip when Severus turned back in her direction.

 

Lily blurted out, “You know as well as I do what this is about.”

 

Severus, to her astonishment, snorted as he donned his familiar jacket.  “As if we were teenagers caught in a broom cupboard. What will he do, dismiss us?  Allow me to do the talking. I have more experience dealing with his … manipulations.  And do  _ not  _ look directly into his eyes.  While I do not think he would actually attempt to see your thoughts, it is always a possibility where he is concerned.”

 

Knowing Severus had to be a master at double-speak to survive as a spy, Lily willingly let him take control of the situation.  “Let's go and get it over with.”

 

Once arriving in Albus' office, they were invited to have a seat.  “I could not help but take notice of the absence of two of my professors from the evening meal, one of which is a Head of House.  I am sure I do not need to remind you of your responsibilities and the necessity for decorum.” 

 

The Headmaster fixed them with a look over his half-moon glasses that expressed his dissatisfaction with them, making Lily want to squirm, wondering if the man had any idea what had kept them.  Severus, on the other hand, was the picture of nonchalance, going so far as to prop an ankle on one knee, fingers threaded together and resting at his waist, expression giving nothing away. How could he be so calm when less than thirty minutes ago they'd …?  Thoughts of their previous activity threatened to send heat into her cheeks, which would be a sure giveaway as to what the delay had been.

 

“My apologies, Headmaster.  Something … unexpected … arose that needed our immediate attention.  While the situation itself was handled expeditiously, the aftermath delayed us.  When we realized the time, we decided it best to have dinner in our quarters.”

 

Lily had to bite the inside of her lip – hard – to keep her expression neutral and to, again, keep the heat from flooding her cheeks.  Merlin, how did Sev do it? How did he look Albus in the eye and tell him, without explicitly saying it, that they hadn't made it to dinner because she'd been too randy to wait until later?  No way could she ever look Albus in the eye and do what Severus had just done. Then again, she was a Gryffindor; Sev was a Slytherin. She supposed it stood to reason that silver tongue of his would be able to spin any believable tale.  It was what Slytherins tended to do, after all. Use their words as their weapons, first and foremost.

 

“I am not fond of my professors being the center of rumors and gossip, so I must insist that at least one of you be at every meal.”

 

Severus snorted.  “With all due respect, Lily and I have been the focus of that from the beginning, Headmaster.  People will talk. They will believe whatever they choose.”

 

“All the more reason to not add fuel to the fire, as they say.  If another situation arises, I expect you to request assistance.”

 

Severus nodded curtly.  “Understood. Was there anything else?  I believe I have rounds this evening.”

 

Albus motioned for them to go, so they stood and walked out of his office so Severus could begin his duty of monitoring the corridors.  They made it as far as the seventh floor before Lily let out the laughter she had been holding in. For a few minutes, all she could do was laugh. Wiping the tears from her eyes, she looked up at the man next to her, shaking her head in admiration.

 

“Something arose?  Handled expeditiously?  Delayed by the aftermath?  How do you come up with these things?”

 

Severus smirked at her.  “Nothing of what I said was untrue.”

 

“I know.  It's just the way you made it sound, as if something really had come up.”

 

With brow raised and high color in his cheeks, but a sly grin on his face, Severus asked, “Did it not?”

 

Lily gaped at him.  She couldn't help it.  Never in her wildest dreams had she ever thought she'd hear a double entendre cross Severus' lips, much less hear him allude to their intimacy in such a joking manner.  He would not have done so all those years ago. Then, he barely could talk about intimacy, much less to willingly do so. She knew it had to do with his childhood, a mother who didn't really care and a father who was violent a lot of the time.  He had learned not to verbalize his inner wants or needs. To hear him now, making a joke with her about it, warmed her heart, though she very much knew he would always remain rather reserved in public. She was okay with that.

 

Snapping her mouth shut, Lily grinned wickedly.  “Yes, it did, in fact. You, Sev, have a very wicked … tongue.  Merlin knows what I'm going to do if Harry takes after you more than he already does.  Come on. You're supposed to be wandering the corridors looking for rule-breakers.” She glanced at him from the corner of her eye.  “And assistance won't be necessary for the next … situation.”

 

She snickered at Severus' disdainfully curled lip as he agreed with her.  “Most assuredly not.”

 

Conscious of appearances, Lily kept a respectable distance between them as they walked, her hands in her pockets.  He seemed to understand, or had the same thing in mind, as he didn't attempt to close the small gap and kept his hands firmly clasped behind his back.  Just around the corner, they caught a couple of students getting a little carried away with their public display of affection. It took every bit of willpower Lily had to keep a straight face when she realized the girl had been one of the girls in the library Lily had overheard talking, and allowed Severus to handle the situation.  From the Ravenclaw's expression, she seemed doubly mortified to have been caught by them, though she couldn't have known Lily had overheard them.

 

Sending them off with points deducted and detentions given, Severus turned back to Lily and sighed.  “It is a miracle there aren't more … unfortunate accidents … occurring than there are.”

 

Giggling, Lily curled her hands into fists in her pockets to curb the urge to reach out to him.  “Yes, well, I imagine it's difficult to control oneself when overcome with such strong … urges.” 

 

Up went one of Severus' brows and his lips pursed.  “Indeed.”

 

Lily snickered.  “Come on. Let's see who else needs a little behavior modification.”

 

SSLE

 

Severus dreaded facing his NEWT class the following morning.  Most certainly, at least one of the girls Lily had overheard would be present.  Lily didn't tell him what House the girls belonged to, and he didn't bother to ask.  Even at breakfast, he kept his focus on his plate, despite the little nudge he felt against his foot, Lily's attempt at being sympathetic and supportive.  The silver lining in this situation was that his NEWT class was the first of the morning so he didn't have to spend the entire day anxious over it. He managed to eat a decent breakfast before disappearing to the dungeons to prepare himself.  The bad thing was, the next morning he had to do it again for his other NEWT class.

 

Severus had debated as to whether to continue wearing his usual jacket or lose it as he had done previously, ultimately choosing to keep it on.  He regarded it as a layer of armor, a comforting one, against the enamored girl or girls. Perhaps it would send an instantaneous signal of sorts to keep their minds on their work, especially since they were brewing antidotes for some of the most vicious of poisons.  There was no room for errors.

 

Pacing in his office, he found himself self-conscious about everything he did.  The clanging of the bell signified the beginning of lessons for the day. Shoving it all deep using his Occlumency as Lily had suggested, he lifted his chin and strode into the classroom, his presence hushing the students as always.  One corner of Severus' lips twitched. That hadn't changed, at least. He forced himself to catch the eye of them all, taking note of the not-so-well- hidden disappointment of one Merula Snyde, which told Severus the seventh-year brunette had been one of the girls Lily had overheard.  Fortunately for his sanity, the girl had not acted on her thoughts. Heaven forbid he should have to deal with  _ that _ .  

 

Inhaling deeply, he waved his wand at the blackboard, notes from his lecture appearing, as he took to wandering the room.  “Today's lesson, and the foreseeable lessons, shall cover poisons that target specific systems in the body and their antidotes.  The first one we shall study is Cor Prohibere, known to induce heart attacks in its victims within a minute of consumption. If you have completed your assigned reading, you should be able to recite to me the signs of cardiac arrest.  Anyone wish to volunteer?” Not a single hand lifted, garnering a sneer from their professor. When he spoke, they all knew by the familiar tone, one they had heard all their previous years, that they had best be prepared the next time.   “Too busy with your social lives to concentrate on your studies? Need I remind you that you chose to continue your education in this subject? If you do not give this class the respect it deserves then you will find yourself out and not returning.  Am I clear?”

 

Satisfied that he had them sufficiently chastised, he began again.  “Open your texts to page 30 and actually  _ read  _ the chapter.”  

 

A fluttering on his left caught his eye.  Giving the motion his full attention he saw a piece of Transfigured parchment winging its way from Miss Snyde to Miss Breton.  Snatching the paper crane from the air, he turned it to ash.

 

“Twenty points from Slytherin, Miss Snyde.  I highly suggest you focus before I send you out of this room.”

 

“Yes, sir.”

 

With a curt nod, Severus continued on to the front of the room, emptying his hand of the ash into the rubbish bin, then stalked around the room once more.  He actually  _ feared  _ what that note had to say.  He certainly did not need  _ more  _ students thinking as Miss Snyde did.  A slight shudder went through him at the notion.  Standing at the back of the room, hands clasped behind him, watching for further evidence of students not reading, Severus let out a nearly inaudible sigh.   _ Why _ was he still teaching snot-nosed brats and hormonal teenagers?  Oh, that's right. Because he actually enjoyed it now. Not all of the younger ones were brats, just as not all of the teens were driven by their baser needs.  He knew exactly how his change of heart came to be. Two months ago, his life turned an abrupt one-eighty, throwing him for a loop. If any of the students had dared look back at their professor, they would have noticed a small, contented smile softening his stern features as he reflected on the best turn his life could have ever taken.

 

SSLE

 

For two days, Harry overheard speculation about his parents having missed dinner.  He mostly ignored it, not really understanding the looks that accompanied the majority of the talk.  The older kids would smirk and say that his parents must have been busy, but the way they said it made it sound as if they meant something else.  The younger students believed something had happened that they had to deal with, but none of them could say just what it had been. Harry figured something must have prevented them from showing up.  He really didn't care what it had been.

 

Then, finally, on Thursday, an announcement in The Daily Prophet diverted everyone's attention from the obviously-coupled professors.  Neville handed over his newspaper to Harry, his mouth and eyes wide open, unable to return to his breakfast. Harry read the headline, then quickly made his way through the short text.

 

“Gringotts was broken into!  Nothing was taken, though. Who in their right mind would try to break into Gringotts?  Dad told me it was the most secure of places next to Hogwarts, if not  _ the  _ most secure place since it's run by goblins.”

 

Neville shrugged.  “What do you think they were after?  Gold? Seems a bit risky for that. I mean, if you wanted someone's gold, all you had to do was use the Imperius Curse and tell them to hand over all the gold they had.”

 

Harry, having been educated on the Unforgivables, nodded.  “That definitely sounds less dangerous. Someone intent on committing a crime isn't likely to care if they use an Unforgivable or not.  I think they were after something else.” 

 

“But what could they have been looking for?”

 

“I don't know.”  Harry glanced up at the staff table, taking curious note of the furious conversation going on between his mum, dad, Professor McGonagall, and Professor Dumbledore.  “I think Mum and Dad may know, though. I'll ask after class today. I still have to ask Dad about using the lab to help you anyway.”

 

Neville blushed and stammered.  “Oh, you don't have to.”

 

Harry leveled his friend with a look that clearly stated the boy was being silly.  “I told you I would. I want to help. Dad will let us. Unless, of course, he has to use the room for detention or something, but that won't be all the time.  Maybe we can practice on Sundays for a couple of hours. There's not likely to be any detentions and there's still time before and after to finish our other schoolwork.”

 

“Well, only if you're sure, Harry.  I don't want to make him mad at having to spend part of his weekend watching us.”

 

“He won't be.  You worry too much, Neville.  Just by being willing to spend part of your Sunday working on it will show Dad that you really want to learn.  He'll be impressed.”

 

“Okay.”

 

Harry could tell his friend still wasn't convinced, but Harry was.  He knew his dad and knew that he would willingly spend time with anyone who wanted to improve their skills.  The bell clanged, signaling the imminent start of classes.

 

“Come on, Neville.  We should get to class, though Defense Against the Dark Arts seems like a waste of time.”

 

SSLE

 

Harry waited until the lab was empty save for himself and Neville.  “Dad, I have a question.”

 

“I may have an answer, Harry.  What is it you wanted to ask?”

 

“Well, I was wondering if Neville and I could use the room on Sundays to help him with Potions until he gets more comfortable.  We wouldn't touch anything but what we needed. I thought that maybe we could practice whatever we did in class.”

 

Harry waited while his dad seemed to think it over.  “Very well. The lab is yours to use on the days I have not assigned any detentions.  You will be supervised at all times. If I or your mother is unable to be here with you, you must forego the session.  Understood?”

 

Harry nodded vigorously.  “Yes, sir.” Harry fidgeted a bit before forcing his next question from his mouth.  “What happened at Gringotts? Why would someone try to steal something from there?”

 

When his dad fiddled with some things on his desk, waved his wand to erase the board, Harry knew his dad did, indeed, know what it was all about.  His dad's words confirmed it, especially combined with the  _ look _ , the one that clearly said  _ Do as I say _ .  

 

“That is none of your concern.  What is your next class, Mr. Longbottom?”

 

“Er, History of Magic, sir.”

 

Severus wrote out two quick notes, handing the appropriate notes to the boys.  “Give these to your professors, but do attempt to get to class on time.”

 

“Thanks, Dad.  Come on, Neville.”  The two headed quickly towards the door, but Harry stopped and looked back.  “Oh, by the way. We'll be by after lunch on Sunday.”

 

“I will expect you, then.  Now, get to class.”

 

SSLE

 

On Sunday, Harry decided it was time to stay in Gryffindor tower for the week, despite Ginny's brother Ron being there.  He figured he should be around in case the others were still bothering Neville, even if his friend had said nothing more about it.  Besides, his mum had once spent a lot of time in that tower and he was curious to see how it looked. Along with staying there, it had been the stipulation that whichever dorm he stayed in, he would follow that House's timetable.

 

Harry met Neville at the lab door.  “Hey, Neville. Ready to give it a try?”

 

The blonde Gryffindor shrugged.  “I guess. I really do need the help.”

 

Harry knew the boy was nervous at the prospect of being supervised by Harry's dad.  It still made Harry want to laugh at seeing so many people cowed by him, as Harry knew his dad had changed how he taught his classes.  Not only that, but just a few days ago, his dad had taken fifteen points from Slytherin when he caught Malfoy making snide and rather derogatory comments to several Hufflepuff first-years.  Harry mentally rolled his eyes. How long did it have to take before people understood that the Potions professor they once knew was different? Maybe once all of the students who knew how his dad had been were gone, then people wouldn't shy away from him.

 

Opening the door to the classroom, Harry pulled Neville into the room, noticing a cauldron and some ingredients sitting out on their usual table.  He recognized the selection right away and turned to his friend.

 

“This one will be easy.  I promise.”

 

Footsteps echoed through the short corridor at the front of the room that led to what Harry knew to be his dad's office.  Sure enough, within seconds, his dad entered, giving him an acknowledging nod. “You are on time. That will give us the maximum amount of time allotted for this. Take your seats.”

 

Neville practically quaked with nerves, so Harry attempted to set his friend at ease.  “It's okay, Neville. No one here is going to judge you. The potion Dad has us set up for is a very forgiving one, so you can still make some mistakes and get a good result.”

 

To Harry's surprise, his dad brought over a stool to sit opposite them at their table.  “I believe Harry has mentioned to you that successfully brewing a potion comes down to a certain rhythm.  That is a very apt description. That is what we shall focus on for this particular potion.” With a little wave of his wand, there came a slow, rhythmic ticking no faster than a second hand on a watch.  “First, you must learn to anticipate the beat. Use your finger to tap the table with each one.”

 

Harry followed along so that Neville didn't feel odd being the only one to do so.  It took a minute or two for Neville to get comfortable enough to copy the beat, but when he did, Harry could see his friend's self-esteem climb just a little.

 

“Well done.  Now, on to the potion.  Chop the daisy roots, with each slice of your knife moving on each beat.”

 

Harry demonstrated what his dad had meant, coaxing Neville into action.  He grinned when Neville appeared to have no trouble with this task. After the roots, they used the same method for the rest of the ingredients, whether chopping, slicing, or grinding.  With each of Neville's successes, Harry could tell in his friend's straighter posture that he was finally gaining some confidence in himself. Maybe now Neville wouldn't be so nervous in Potions class.  

 

Before long, Neville had successfully brewed a potion for the first time ever, staring into his cauldron with a look of absolute awe.  “I did it!”

 

“Indeed.  Well done, Mr. Longbottom.”  Severus canceled the ticking spell he'd used.  “All of the potions you will study this year can be properly brewed at the rhythmic pace we used.  Employ the same method in class and you should have no issues.”

 

“How?  I won't be able to listen to a beat in class.”

 

“There are numerous ways to find a beat.  Listening to it is merely one of them. Visualization and tactile sensations are others.  Whichever you choose, rest assured, you will not be disturbed.”

 

“Thanks, Professor.  I'm not sure which would be easiest in class, though.”

 

“You have only to inform me when you have decided so I may prepare, whether casting the auditory spell, collecting something for your visualization, or using the tactile spell on something.”

 

Harry grinned at his friend before turning to his dad.  “Why not teach all of our classes like that, Dad? Surely, it would help others.”

 

“I have found many think the method more distracting than helpful.  However, if you speak with your peers and discover them to be interested, I will do the same for them.”

 

“You would?”  Harry's surprised question earned him a sharp glance from his dad.

 

“Why would I not?  You are well-aware I prefer my students desiring to learn.  If there is something that can be done to foster that desire, then it should be done.”

 

Harry grinned.  At this rate, everyone would come to see his dad as he was now, rather than how he used to be, by Halloween, Christmas at the latest.  “I know. I just thought that you wouldn't want a bunch of ticking, bouncing or vibrating going on in class. I mean, I imagine it could get annoying.”

 

His dad let out a little laugh.  “Perhaps …  _ if  _ … the spells could not be isolated to small areas.  They can be; therefore, no irritation.”

 

By the end of the two hours, Neville managed to create another potion that would have earned him an Exceeds Expectations had they been in class, raising the shy boy's self-confidence another notch.  “Thanks, professor! I never thought I'd be able to do that well.”

 

“You are welcome, Mr. Longbottom.  You did all of the work, however. The ability was present all along.”

 

“Dad, is Mum around?  I thought I'd say hi if she was.”

 

“She is in Hogsmeade with Mrs.Tonks, but should return soon.”

 

“Oh, okay.  Maybe later, then.  Oh, by the way, I thought I'd let you know I'll be in Gryffindor this week.”

 

His dad gave him a nod and small smile.  “Duly noted. I will inform Professor McGonagall.”

 

Neville turned to Harry, anxiously.  “Are you sure, Harry? There's bound to be trouble.”

 

Harry could have kicked his friend for that statement, especially since his dad's gaze sharpened on them.  “You worry too much, Neville. There won't be any trouble.” He began clearing away the remaining ingredients, hoping his dad would believe him.  No such luck.

 

“If there is, Harry, you inform Professor McGonagall immediately.  If I hear that you have kept silent, you will find yourself in detention with me until Christmas, and that will  _ not  _ be a pleasant experience.”

 

Tempted though he was to roll his eyes at his dad's protectiveness, he didn't dare.  Not when his dad was this adamant. If anything major happened, he may speak up, but he certainly wouldn't for every little thing.  That would be pointless and would accomplish nothing. If anything, it would probably make things worse.

 

“I mean what I say, Harry.”

 

Apparently, he had been silent too long.  “I know. I will tell you if something bad happens, but don't worry.  It won't.” 

 

His dad's eyes narrowed and Harry thought for certain his dad had caught on to the carefully worded answer he had been given.  He figured he should have known better. His dad was a Slytherin through and through, after all. He, of all people, would hear what wasn't being said.  To Harry's amazement, his dad merely nodded.

 

“Very well.  Now, go on. I shall finish here.”

 

Harry had a feeling his dad wasn't going to let it go that easily, but he wasn't going to hang around and give the man the opportunity to actually do something, like try to have him escorted everywhere or something.  Oh, yeah, as if  _ that  _ wouldn't constitute special treatment or anything, something his dad had been insistent that he understand could not take place.

 

“Come on, Neville.  Let's go outside for a bit and relax before we start our essays.”

 

“Alright.  Thanks again, Professor.”

 

“Thanks, Dad.  See you later.”

 

“Do not procrastinate too long.  It would not do to be up late attempting to finish essays you could have already completed.”

 

Sometimes it was just awful to have a professor for a parent.  Sighing, and barely keeping from rolling his eyes, Harry nodded.  “Okay, Dad.” Grabbing Neville's sleeve, he tugged his friend away from the table and out the door.  Out in the corridor, Harry groaned. “Sometimes, I hate being related to a professor.”

 

“Well,” came a smarmy voice Harry recognized as belonging to Malfoy, “I'm sure he hates being related to  _ you _ .  I know I would.  What's the matter,  _ Potter _ , disappointing Daddy with your atrocious potion-making and begging for remedial work?”

 

Harry snorted.  “You do realize what you just said made absolutely no sense, right?  You call me  _ Potter _ and then reference the professor as my dad?  What, can't make up your mind as to who I am? Are you confused?  Seems to be perpetual. Maybe you should see Madam Pomfrey. Surely, there's something that can be done to help you.”

 

Malfoy's cheeks turned pink, his gray eyes boring into Harry with his standard sneer.  “I'm not the one who's a filthy half-blood in Slytherin  _ and  _ Gryffindor.  So, getting help from Daddy, hoping he'll take pity on you and give you a score you don't deserve?”

 

Harry crossed his arms, chin lifting, a perfect imitation of his father's oft-used stance.  “That's rich coming from you. Unless I remember wrong, I've always finished before you have  _ and  _ mine have been closer to perfect than any of yours.”

 

“Or so the professor says.  A bit biased, if you ask me.”

 

“Well, no one did ask you.  You're the one who decided to come talk to us.  If you'd just left us alone, Neville and I would have been gone by now and you could go on about your business, doing whatever it is you find interesting.”

 

“And, perhaps, that is what you should do now, Mr. Malfoy, rather than antagonizing your fellow students.  I believe I have already spoken about this with all of Slytherin, have I not?”

 

Malfoy's smirk melted, his pale complexion growing paler as he eyed the professor at the classroom door.  “Yes, sir.”

 

“Therefore, you are aware of the consequences of violating those directives that I set forth at the beginning of the year regarding expected Slytherin behavior.”

 

Harry met Malfoy's glare with a raised brow, knowing the blond Slytherin was about to be in some serious trouble.  While Harry hadn't been present when those instructions had been given out, he had seen them posted on the bulletin board in the common room.  Malfoy had broken several of them at once. Harry was more than willing to stay still and hope he was privy to Malfoy's punishment. That was not to be.

 

“Mr. Snape, I suggest you take your own advice and continue on to whatever activity you had planned.  Unless, of course, you would prefer to join Mr. Malfoy in his punishment with me?”

 

“No, sir,” Harry replied rather emphatically.  “Come on, Neville.”

 

They reached the ground floor before Neville spoke.  “Would he have punished you? You weren't doing anything.”

 

“I'm sure he would have.  Probably for sticking around and hoping to see what Malfoy's punishment would be.  That really isn't any of our business. Besides that, if he says he'll do it, then he will.”  

 

Stepping out into the warm sunshine, Harry discovered that many of the students had the same idea.  The grounds seemed rather full. “Hey, let's go talk to Hagrid. He's a bit odd most of the time, but can be fun sometimes.  I've been in his cabin a couple of times, and everything is huge. Sitting in his chairs makes you feel like a little toy figure.  A word of caution, though. Don't eat anything he says he made himself. To us, it's inedible.”

 

“Well, okay, I guess.  If you say so.”

 

“He's big, but pretty much harmless.  Hey, he may even be able to tell us something about the Gringotts break-in.”

 

Neville shrugged.  “Okay. Sounds good.  I hope he can tell us something about that.”

 

SSLE

 

“Dora!”  Lily rushed forward to hug the girl she had once child-minded.  Holding her at arm's length, she looked the girl over. “Merlin, what a difference ten years makes.  You're all grown up!”

 

“Hey!  I  _ am  _ almost nineteen, after all!”

 

Lily looked around curiously as she took her seat at their table.  “Your mum couldn't make it?”

 

“Nah, she's not feeling very well.  A cold, I think.”

 

“Oh, that's too bad.  Well, I'm glad I could see you anyway.  How do you like being an Auror? I have to say I never thought you'd take that career path.”

 

Dora shrugged.  “It seemed like a good challenge and I really do want to help track down any Dark wizards out there.  I mean, there's always someone committing crimes, right?”

 

“True.  Unfortunately.  The break-in at Gringotts is a prime example.”

 

Dora nodded solemnly.  “It's too bad the goblins won't allow us to investigate.  I'd love to know why the attempt. It's just a good thing whatever was there had already been withdrawn.”

 

Lily frowned.  She knew exactly what had been taken and had argued with Albus about how unwise it was to keep the thing in the school, but of course, she'd been overruled.  Her only consolation was that he asked her to add to the protections some of the other professors had created. She could only hope that the safety measures weren't warranted, but  _ if  _ they were, at least one of the protections was Muggle-related.  That would surely slow down a witch or wizard long enough to be stopped permanently.  Of course, she'd been reassured that nothing would happen.

 

“Lily?”

 

Lily snapped out of her musings, giving Dora a sheepish smile.  “Sorry. I was just thinking about the break-in. I'm really hoping it isn't an indication of things to come.”    

 

“What do you mean?”

 

Lily pasted a smile on her face and said with a casual wave of her hand, “Oh, nothing.  Don't mind me. Just looking for things that probably aren't there.”

 

Dora looked as if she didn't believe her, but recovered, her expression turning impish.  “So, you and the professor, huh?”

 

A little self-conscious, Lily shrugged, then laughed.  “I know. I'm sure it's difficult for you to believe. I know he wasn't anyone outside of Slytherin's favorite professor.  He's not so bad now.” Thinking of what she had overheard sent heat into her cheeks and she snickered.

 

“Okay, spill it,” Dora ordered.  “There's obviously a story behind the blushing and the laughter.  You can't keep that to yourself.”

 

“Oh, I don't know if I should say.  It's not exactly appropriate for young ears.  Not to mention how Sev would feel if he knew I mentioned it.”

 

Dora rubbed her hands together eagerly.  “Oh, a juicy story, then. Now, you  _ really  _ have to tell it.  Besides, I'm not  _ that  _ young.”

 

Lily wanted to share it, to talk about things like this with girlfriends, just as every other woman did.  At nearly nineteen, Dora was young for this kind of talk, but they they seemed to get along like close sisters.  It was like instant camaraderie. Andromeda was a bit more reserved than her daughter. Lily didn't think the elder Tonks would willingly discuss this sort of thing, and oh, Lily wanted desperately to share.  

 

Dora grinned wickedly.  “You might as well tell it.  I can see that you want to.”

 

“Well, okay, but … ”

 

“Hey, I'm an adult.  I can handle it.” Dora's eyes took on a gleeful light.  “Oh, is it about certain … urges?” When she didn't receive a response right off, she prodded.  “So …?”

 

“Okay, well, now, Sev is going about his teaching in a better way and some of the older girls have taken notice.”

 

Dora grinned.  “I think I may know where this is going but go on.”

 

“Well, I stumbled upon some girls in the library and received quite the shock.  I guess the girls had been talking about their fantasy crushes or whatever. One of them, a Slytherin girl, talked about a, er, certain professor.”

 

Dora clapped her hands once.  “Ha! I knew it! Well, if he's got some of the girls stirred up, I think I want to meet him again.  So, what exactly was said? Come on, I want details!”

 

Lily dropped her head into her hand, face heating.  “Oh, your mum will kill me for telling you any of this.”

 

“What she doesn't know …  Now, quit stalling. What are the girls saying about Professor Grouchy Git?  Yes, I'm refraining from using some of the crueler names that have been used.”

 

Cheeks prickling still from her embarrassment, Lily shook her head.  “I still can't believe what I heard. I never knew girls that age talked like that.  I mean, I certainly didn't.”

 

Dora laughed.  “Oh, you just don't know.  A lot has changed since you were in school.  I mean, the Wizarding world is mostly conservative, but the young people tend to be rather progressive.  Even pure-bloods. You're still stalling.”

 

Lily laughed.  This was what she had missed out on.  This talking, giggling even, over experiences.  She had longed for this type of companionship. She'd mostly kept to herself during those ten years in Spain.   

 

“Well, this one girl, she started going on about Sev's body.”  At Dora's raised brows, Lily backtracked. “With his NEWT classes, he's apparently taken to leaving that jacket of his in his quarters and he ties his hair back, well, some of his hair.  Just to keep it out of his face, you know?”

 

“Ohhh, now I'm really intrigued.  Jealous, too. I'd have loved to have seen that every class.”

 

Lily snorted.  “It gets worse.  She started ticking off all the things she loved: his cheekbones, his long fingers, his voice that could cut or caress, according to her – which I have to agree with but still.  She said she'd love to, er, be able to touch him. She wondered how it would be to be touched  _ by  _ him.  She even said …”  Lily covered her face with her hands.  “Oh, Merlin, I can't believe I'm telling you this.  She said she wondered what it be like to  _ loosen him up _ because he always presented such a reserved front in public.”

 

Dora started fanning herself.  “Whew! He  _ must  _ have changed!”

 

Lily nodded, chuckling in embarrassment.  “There's more, but that's probably enough.”

 

Dora shook her head.  “Oh, no, you're telling me  _ everything _ !”

 

Ducking her head, Lily rubbed at her forehead, trying to figure out how she was going to tell the rest.  “The, er, girl, she wondered how … vocal … Sev was during certain … moments.”

 

Dora's jaw dropped.  “Whoa. That's rather bold, but not surprising.  I heard talk like that during seventh year. Granted, not about any of the professors, but with celebrities, yes.”

 

“You did?  Huh. Different times, like you said, I guess.  I never would have dared to say something like that about one of my professors.  Then again, I didn't have any that were worth talking that way about. This girl said she was jealous of me.”

 

“Ah, because of your relationship, right?”  Dora wiggled her brows, grinning. “The benefits, right?  So, what did you do after hearing all of this? Scold them for talking like that?  Take points? Give them detentions?”

 

The color had begun to recede from her cheeks only to flood them again with Dora's question.  “No, I, er, didn't do any of those things. I practically ran to, er, well …”

 

Dora let out full-bodied laugh.  “Sent you straight to the dungeons, did it?”

 

“Merlin, I'm so embarrassed, too.  I mean, I'm thirty-one years old. I should be able to control myself by now.”

 

“Nonsense!  It's only been, what, a month or two since you two have been back together?  You're still in the honeymoon phase. Especially coming off a ten-plus-year hiatus.  Wait. I'm assuming there was a hiatus.” When Lily just gave her a look, Dora grinned.  “Of course there was. Well, I guess I don't have to ask how your little … moment … went.”

 

Lily chuckled.  “No, er, you don't.”  Using her thumbnail to scratch her eyebrow, she embarrassingly admitted, “We … missed dinner.  Then, the Headmaster called us up to his office.”

 

Dora laughed uproariously, wiping tears from her eyes.  “Oh, Merlin! Called up like naughty schoolchildren! Oh, I'm so glad I could come see you.  Ever since I had read that you were back, I've wanted to see you but I've been too busy, and I know you've been trying to settle into things, too.”

 

“I'm glad you could come, too.  I've had so much fun chatting with you.  I hope you can meet Harry sometime.”

 

“I'd love that.  How is the kid doing?  Adjusting to everything okay?”

 

“He seems to be.  He's been singled-out, of course, but from what I've seen, he's been alright.”  Lily chuckled. “I was so nervous at the Sorting. Sev, too. Mainly because Harry was.  He made himself sick worrying over our reactions to where he was placed. In his mind, a Slytherin placing would be disloyal to me, but a Gryffindor placing meant Sev wouldn't be happy.”

 

Dora winced in sympathy.  “Poor kid. So, what's the verdict?”

 

Grinning with pride, Lily announced, “Both Houses.”

 

Dora's jaw dropped.  “What? Both? How did that happen?  How could that even work?”

 

“The Hat refused to put Harry in only one of the Houses, said it wasn't going to make Harry choose.  He's allowed access to both dorms. Whichever dorm he chooses to stay in, that's the class timetable that he follows.  So far, he's stayed in Slytherin, but I imagine he'll be going to Gryffindor soon. His friend is a Gryffindor.”

 

“Interesting.  Slytherins and Gryffindors have never really gotten along, but maybe you, the professor, and Harry will be able to change that.”

 

“I hope so.  It's time to bury the prejudices between the Houses.  Sev is trying to improve Slytherin's reputation by being strict about behaviors, taking points from his House and giving them detentions if warranted.  Needless to say, there's been some resistance. It'll just take time.”

 

Dora nodded her agreement.  “It  _ will  _ take time.  Once certain children pass through the school, it'll be easier, I think.  Not easy, of course, but  _ easier _ .”

 

“You may be right.”  They talked about many other things before Lily glanced at her watch.  “I should get back. This has been great. I can't wait to do it again.  I feel like I can talk to you about things that I wouldn't be able to say to your mum.”

 

“Yeah, well, mum may not be uptight like the other Blacks, Narcissa in particular, but neither is she relaxed enough to engage in  _ bedroom talk  _ or anything of that nature.  Glad to hear you feel you can talk to me about that stuff.  I look forward to seeing Harry.” She gave Lily a cheeky wink.  “And the incredibly-changed professor, of course, though he may wish to stay as far from me as possible.  My clumsiness and potions don't mix all that well.”

 

“I can only imagine how that went.  Don't worry, though. He'll be civil.  He may be blunt – he did reference your mother's resemblance to Bellatrix and Bellatrix being in Azkaban – but he'll be civil.”

 

Dora winced.  “Blunt. Yeah.  Thankfully, Mum doesn't mind that she has a sister in prison.  In Mum's opinion, that's the best place for Bellatrix.”

 

“Hey, do me a favor, will you?  If you happen to hear anything about that Gringotts thing, let me know will you?  I have this feeling that there's something seriously wrong going on.”

 

“Yeah, sure.  I doubt I'll hear anything, but if I do, I'll let you know.”

 

“Thanks.  Until next time, then.”  Lily reached over and gave the youngest Tonks a tight hug.

 

SSLE

 

“I can't believe he told us that!” Neville exclaimed excitedly as he and Harry wandered back into the castle after having visited Hagrid.

 

“But who is Nicholas Flamel?  That name sounds vaguely familiar, but I can't remember where I may have seen it or heard it.”

 

“Do you think your mum or dad would know?”

 

Harry shook his head.  “You heard my dad when I mentioned it earlier.  I wouldn't dare go back to him about it. I'm sure Mum would just tell me the same thing Dad did.  No, I think we can figure this out on our own. We can check the library after we get our homework done.”  Harry strode over to the stairs leading down to the dungeons. “Let me go get my books for tomorrow. What classes do you have?”

 

“Potions, of course.  Then, Herbology. After lunch, there's Charms and Transfiguration.”

 

“Okay.  I'll go get those and meet you back here.  I'll worry about the other class stuff later.”

 

“If you're certain.  I still think there will be trouble, if not with everyone else, then with Ron Weasley.  I mean, there's already a bad history there, on his side.”

 

Harry shrugged, not feeling particularly concerned.  “I really don't think he'll do anything. He strikes me as more of a coward, all talk.  Anyway, it's not going to change my mind. I'll be back.”

 

Harry hurried down the stairs to his common room and into his dorm, aware of the unfriendly looks some of the Slytherins still threw his way.  Harry rolled his eyes and continued on. They were just going to have to get over whatever problem they had. Things were changing and they couldn't stop it.  Harry gathered a week's worth of uniforms, knowing the House color and insignia on the robes and ties would change the instant he entered that House's common room.  Folding them and stuffing them into an overnight bag, Harry, then, collected what he needed for the next day's classes, tossing those into his satchel. Shouldering both bags, he found his way blocked by Malfoy.

 

“Going somewhere?  Finally had enough and running to Mummy and Daddy?  Good. We didn't want you here, anyway.”

 

“Give it a rest, already, Malfoy.  I've heard it all. You haven't impressed me yet.  Haven't scared me yet, either.”

 

Malfoy looked Harry up and down, face twisted into disgust.  “Why would I try to impress someone like you?”

 

“I don't know, but what else am I supposed to think when you continually seek me out and spew this stuff?  Because you're certainly not intimidating, that's for sure.”

 

“Oh, I can be.  Just you wait.”

 

Harry let out a scornful snort.  “For what? All you ever do is go whinging to Death Eater Daddy.  He hasn't done a thing.”

 

Malfoy's eyes narrowed.  “Don't think you're better than me, Snape.  Your Daddy was right there with mine at one time.”

 

“You see, that's the difference between us, Malfoy.  I  _ don't  _ think I'm better than you.  I  _ do _ , however, believe my dad is better than yours.  He, at least, owned up to what he did and doesn't think that stuff anymore.”

 

“That's because he's sullied his name with your Mudblood mother.”

 

Instantly angry, Harry dropped his bags, advancing on the other boy.  “I told you not to say that about my mum!”

 

“Oh, I'm scared, now,” sniveled Malfoy mockingly.  

 

“You should be, especially when you already have detention tonight.  This should get interesting.”

 

“What are you on about?”

 

Just then, the dorm door opened to reveal the Slytherin Head of House, face set in a stony expression.  “He is referring to the Monitoring Charms I set on the dorms to inform me of when  _ that  _ particular slur is used.  If you had bothered to read the notice on the bulletin board, you would have known.”  He strode forward and grabbed Malfoy by the back of his robe. “I do not appreciate having to repeat myself, Mr. Malfoy.  Your detentions begin now.”

 

Malfoy paled at the sight of his irate professor.  “Detentions? Plural?”

 

“Plural.”  He began to march the young Malfoy across the room, pausing long enough to say to Harry, “Get upstairs.”

 

Harry knew better than to do anything but what his dad had instructed.  “Yes, sir.” 

 

He grabbed his bags and followed the other two out of the dorm, through the common room, and past the lab.  When the two stopped at his dad's office, Harry didn't spare them a glance, just continued on to the stairs and began climbing them.  Halfway up the stairs, a light stinging sensation prickled his left forearm. Not thinking anything about it, Harry rubbed absently at the spot and kept climbing, meeting Neville at the top.

 

“Do you have any homework left?”

 

“I just need to practice that Transfiguration assignment.  Other than that, I've finished everything. Why?”

 

Harry gave his friend a sheepish smile.  “Well, I kind of hoped to write a letter to Ginny.  I haven't done so in a while. Would you mind?”

 

Neville grinned.  “Of course not, Harry.  Maybe afterward you can go over the Charms stuff to make sure I have it all straight in my head.”

 

“Sure.”

 

Once the pair finally made it to the seventh floor, Neville stepped in front of the portrait that marked the entrance to Gryffindor tower and gave the password.

 

“You can go in, but your friend stays here.”

 

Neville stared at the portrait in shock.  “What? No, he's allowed in Gryffindor.”

 

The Fat Lady did not appear convinced.  “I've not seen him before. His uniforms are in Slytherin colors.”

 

Harry couldn't believe what he heard.  How would the portrait know what colors were on his uniforms?  More importantly, how was it that the portrait had no idea he was allowed into Gryffindor's common room?  Now what? Did he need to go to Professor Dumbledore about this? Surely, not. Maybe Professor McGonagall could sort out the confusion.

 

“Come on.  Let's find Professor McGonagall.  She can sort it all out.”

 

As luck would have it, the two found her on the fifth floor speaking with a couple of students about an essay.  After informing her of what the portrait said, they followed the Gryffindor Head of House back up the stairs to the portrait.

 

“Mr. Snape has been granted access to Gryffindor tower whenever he wishes as long as he supplies the proper password.”

 

“But, Professor, that boy has Slytherin colors.  No snake has ever been inside this chamber.”

 

“Madam, I am Gryffindor's Head of House.  I say he is allowed. His Slytherin uniform will change to Gryffindor once he steps into the common room.  The Sorting Hat, itself, has placed Mr. Snape in both Houses. Now, please do not obstruct him in the future.”

 

The Fat Lady did not look pleased but obeyed.  “Very well.” With a loud click, the portrait swung open.

 

Harry thanked the professor to which she replied, “Am I to assume, then, you will be mine for the week?”   
  


“Yes, ma'am.  Dad said he would let you know, but I guess he hasn't yet.”

 

“I'm sure he will soon.  Maybe I'll just contact him instead.”

 

Harry cringed a little.  “Er, he's kind of busy with Malfoy right now.  Maybe wait a bit if you do?”

 

Professor McGonagall pursed her lips, not giving away any of her thoughts.  “Perhaps. Now, in you go.”

 

“Thanks, again, Professor.”  

 

As she walked away, Harry followed Neville through the portrait hole.  Slowly, the chatter stopped as more people became aware of his presence, everyone's stares ranging from openly curious to openly hostile.  Not surprisingly, Ron Weasley gave voice to those in the latter grouping.

 

“What the bloody hell are you doing in here?” the Weasley boy asked, marching over to the portrait hole from his place by the fireplace.  “We don't let slimy snakes in here.”

 

Tired of this Weasley's attitude, Harry went into full snarky mode.  “First of all, yes you do. You're in here, after all. Second, the Sorting Hat said I can.  Thirdly, Professor McGonagall just told the Fat Lady to grant me entrance. Lastly, snakes aren't actually slimy; they're quite dry.  I'm surprised you didn't know that. You're thinking of, oh, I don't know, worms and salamanders. Those can be slimy.” Turning away from Ron, he asked of Neville, “Which table do you want to sit at?  I want to get that letter to Ginny done so I can send it off today.”

 

The Weasley twins stepped up to either side of Ron, giving Harry identical grins and winks, and speaking simultaneously.  “Nice, Harry. I'm sure Ginny is looking forward to her next letter. Come on, ickle Ronniekins, leave Harry and Longbottom alone.”  With that, they clamped a hand on each of Ron's shoulders and pulled him away.

 

Neville shook his head in amusement.  “That was either incredibly brave or incredibly stupid.”

 

Harry grinned.  “I prefer incredibly Slytherin.  After all, if I needle him enough, he'll get himself into trouble.  Then, maybe he'll calm down.” Harry shrugged. “Or, maybe he won't.  I don't really care. Where's your dorm? I want to put my uniforms and clothes away first.”

 

After claiming the only empty bed in the dorm and putting everything but writing utensils away, the two friends returned to the common room and sat at an empty table.  While Neville practiced, Harry glanced around the common room, attempting to picture his mum in there, looking at the same murals on the walls, sitting at the same table he now sat at.  Shaking away the thoughts, he distractedly scratched his arm and started in on his letter.

  
  
  
  
  


  
  


 

  
  



	7. Trust

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the long delay. We're getting close to the last chapter that I have managed to write so far, but I am working on it as I can. Enjoy!

_**The best way to find out if you can trust somebody is to trust them.  
― Ernest Hemingway ** _

 

Harry's first night in Gryffindor tower was, surprisingly, quiet. At least it was on the part of the Gryffindors. They gave him the cold shoulder all evening, which was fine with Harry. Actually, he thought it was an improvement over listening to Malfoy's laughable efforts to intimidate him. Sitting at the table, Harry and Neville played a few rounds of Exploding Snap. Then, Harry brought out a deck of Muggle cards and taught Neville how to play a game called gin rummy, Harry winning two of the games and Neville winning one.

 

As Harry prepared for bed that night, he noticed a red irritation where his arm had been stinging periodically that day. There really was no telling what may have been the cause. It certainly wasn't the first time he had developed a temporary irritation to something. With that in mind, Harry shrugged it off, believing nothing to be amiss, that the redness would disappear within a couple of days as usual. As he lay in bed, trying to get to sleep, all he could hear was Ron Weasley's awful snoring. How did the other boys manage to sleep? Tossing and turning, Harry vowed to ask his mum or dad some way to block out the noise, otherwise, he'd never get any rest. Sometime after midnight, Harry finally did drift off.

 

SSLE

 

Severus strode silently into his classroom. While a dramatic entrance like the ones he had been fond of previously garnered the students' immediate attention, he had realized he learned more if he entered without making a sound, something from his spying days he had somehow forgotten. Yes, it was a risk that he may learn of something he preferred not to know. The social lives of his students, for instance. However, with animosity and out-right hatred aimed at his son, Severus thought it best to be prepared for any eventuality, and the only way to do that was by having as much information at one's disposal as possible. Hence, silent steps to allow for the most observations.

 

By the time he reached the front of the room and faced them, all of the chatter and restless movements stopped. “Your essays, if you please.”

 

As the requested rolls of parchment came forth, Severus' perceptive gaze darted around the room, taking in more information in a split-second than nearly everyone else would in a minute. His eyes skimmed over Harry to Longbottom then flew back to Harry, narrowing slightly. His son appeared to have not slept much the night before, if the light shadows under his eyes were any indication. What was the cause? Had the Weasley boy tried something? Or one of the other oft high-strung and headstrong Gryffindors? Catching Harry's eye, he asked what was wrong with a mere lift of his brow, though he expected no real response. A shrug was all he did receive.

 

As the last few scrolls were brought forth, Severus discovered why his son appeared tired through Harry's conversation with Longbottom.

 

“How do you sleep with Weasley making so much noise?”

 

“You get used to it, I guess.”

 

Harry shook his head. “I don't know that I can. He's just so … _loud_.”

 

The tension that had gripped him at his thoughts of bullying eased and Severus pulled a scrap of parchment from his desk, wrote quickly, then folded the parchment before dropping it in front of Harry, avoiding the boy's gaze when it flew up to him. Instead, he busied himself with setting the essays aside.

 

“Shall we see how much of your required reading you have retained? The magical properties of aconite, asphodel and wormwood. What are they?”

 

Having briefly reviewed the three magical ingredients, Severus set them to work on a potion that featured those three in the most quantities, casting _Tardi Rhythmum_ on a small bouncy ball for Neville. He hoped the discussion then the usage of the ingredients would further aid in the students' understanding of how to use them, especially when it came to making substitutions when necessary, even though that particular knowledge wouldn't be expected and used until NEWT classes.

 

As Severus made the rounds, his resolve to remain civil was sorely tested when Gryffindor Seamus Finnigan's cauldron exploded, sending splatters of nasty goop in all directions, coating those nearest to him.

 

“Mr. Finnigan! Obviously, you did not follow the instructions precisely as written. There may be a time and place for your pyrotechnics, but I assure you, my classroom is _not_ it.” Inhaling deeply, he took a moment to control his temper. “Are you injured? Have any of you sustained any injuries?”

 

Upon receiving answers in the negative, Severus siphoned away the ruined potion quickly. Noting that time was nearly up, he made a quick decision. “For the remainder of class, you, Mr. Finnigan, must ascertain what you did incorrectly. I shall expect a one-foot essay outlining your mistakes and the correct method for brewing this potion to be handed to me Sunday, after lunch, where you shall be at this door, ready for another attempt. Is that clear?”

 

“Y-Yes, sir.” The Irish boy gawked up at him, unmoving.

 

Severus arched a brow. “Now, Mr. Finnigan.”

 

He turned away, lips pursed, hiding his amusement, when the boy scrambled to do as he was told. His good humor evaporated instantly as he caught sight of another impending disaster. Knowing he would not make it across the room in time, he used his wand to freeze one of his Slytherins. Did none of them ever pay attention? Potion-making wasn't just throwing things into a cauldron! One had to read and re-read the instructions!

 

“Mr. Zabini, I suggest you double-check what you are about to do with the instructions on the board before you send everyone to the hospital wing!”

 

With a flick of his wand, he released the boy, who, thankfully, put down what he held, checked the board, then picked up the correct ingredient. The next thing to make him frown was the sight of Harry scratching at his arm rather vigorously once again, though he didn't seem to take notice of his actions. Had Finnigan's botched potion reached him? Severus didn't recall seeing any of it that far up. Could he somehow have missed some of it? But then, no one else seemed to have any issues.

 

Stepping up behind Harry, Severus reached between the boys to cease the attempted gouging of Harry's arm. “Is there a problem, Mr. Snape?”

 

“Just an itch, sir.”

 

Severus arched a brow. “ _Just an itch?_ And I am _just a professor_. Pull up … your sleeve.”

 

Taking note of the time, he instructed the class to bottle a sample and clean up. Returning his attention to Harry, he nearly gasped. The boy's inner forearm sported a large red patch of irritated skin. Lightly running his thumb over the area, he checked for inflammation, finding the skin somewhat warm. Releasing Harry's arm, he stared down at his son, vexed at the boy's attempt to hide his condition. What did he have to do to get Harry to come to him if he needed something?

 

“Bottle a sample and clear away your cauldron.” The end-of-class bell clanged. “Do not … move. Mr. Longbottom, proceed to class. Inform your professor that I have detained Mr. Snape and that he will be along soon.”

 

Not waiting for a response, Severus strode into his office to his private potions cupboard. It took longer than it should to find what it was he needed. He made a mental note to work on another batch as soon as he could find the time. Re-entering the classroom, he found it empty save for Harry, marginally amused at his students' hasty retreat.

 

Setting the glass jar on the tabletop with a _clunk_ , Severus eyed Harry once more, fighting his temper. He waved his wand, slamming the classroom door. “ _Just an itch?_ That, Harry, is more than a simple itch. Why have you not sought assistance with it, if not from me than from Madam Pomfrey?”

 

“I really thought it was nothing. I mean, I used to get rashes all the time. Mum was forever slathering something on me. I just figured it would go away on its own.”

 

Some of the tension that had seized him abated at Harry's words. So, it wasn't that his son refused to come to him for anything, it was simply a matter of him not placing importance on it. Severus continued studying the inflamed skin. “How long has this been present? I may be able to determine what you have come across to cause this.”

 

“I don't know. Sometime yesterday, I suppose. Neville and I were on the grounds after leaving here. There's probably no telling what I might have touched.”

 

“As I recall, your arms were covered when you left. Unless you rolled up your sleeves, I doubt whatever it was that caused this can be found outside.”

 

Harry shrugged. “I don't think I did, but it's possible. It was nice yesterday, so I may have.”

 

Opening the jar, Severus scooped out a bit of cream, gently applying a thin layer to Harry's arm. “This is a dittany salve that should soothe the inflammation, easing the itch you are experiencing.”

 

Almost instantly, Harry winced. “It stings.” Taking in a quick breath, he hissed, “It really hurts.”

 

To Severus' shock, red welts popped up over the area he had covered with the salve. Gently, but quickly, he grabbed Harry, rushed him over to the sinks at the back of the room, and turned on one of the taps, shoving his son's arm into the flow of water. Conjuring a flannel, he proceeded to carefully wipe away the remnants of the salve.

 

“I have never witnessed an allergic reaction of any sort to dittany. Have you had a reaction to it previously?”

 

“No. Mum's used it loads of times.” After a few moments, Harry released a sigh. “It still stings a bit but nothing like it did.”

 

“Keep your arm in the water. I want to be certain all of it has been washed away.” Walking to one of the other cupboards in the room, Severus removed some gauze and cotton wrapping.

 

“I didn't know you had that in here.”

 

Severus glanced up at his son and lifted a brow. “Surprised? You are well-aware how volatile potions can be. Today being a prime example.”

 

“I suppose. I guess I just thought you'd send someone to see Madam Pomfrey.”

 

Returning to Harry after measuring out what he thought he would need of the wrapping, Severus quietly admitted, “I did. Previously. Regardless of the injury. I … regret not doing more.”

 

Turning off the tap, he waved his wand to dry Harry's arm. Casting a charm to keep the gauze from sticking to the skin, Severus placed it over the irritated section, then, began winding the cotton around it, keeping it in place with a mild Sticking Charm. He added an Impervious Charm, as well.

 

“Leave this in place for a few days. You may shower as usual. If it does not worsen, you may remove the bandage. If it does, you must go directly to Madam Pomfrey. Is that understood?”

 

“Yes, sir.”

 

“Very well. Gather your books.” Severus wrote out a note for Pomona. “Give this to Professor Sprout.”

 

“Thanks, Dad. I'm, er, sorry if you thought I was trying not to ask you for help.”

 

Severus' surprise showed in the arch of a brow. How had the boy known? Obviously more perceptive than given credit for being. “You need not apologize. I am the one who had jumped to conclusions, Harry. I should apologize to you. I am here if you ever need anything.”

 

“I know, Dad. Thanks.”

 

Severus nodded once, a mere tilt of his chin. “Then you had best get to Herbology.” Opening the lab door, he found the majority of the second-years present, giving Harry odd looks. Quickly coming to the conclusion he had best dispel any rumors before they started, he gave Harry a final reminder. “Remember. That bandage stays in place for a minimum of three days.”

 

Severus nearly grinned when his son made a show of slowly rolling his sleeve down, apparently having caught the looks himself, before replying. “Yes, sir. I will.”

 

Backing out of the doorway, Severus turned professor once again and ushered the second-years into the room, locking away the concern he had over Harry's sudden rash and the unheard of allergic reaction to the dittany, not to mention the placement of the rash itself.

 

SSLE

 

“Lily, have you noticed anything … odd … regarding Quirinus lately?”

 

“Odd? He's always struck me as a bit odd, Sev. You're going to have to be more specific.”

 

Severus stood from the sofa where he had been enjoying the evening with Lily, and paced, hands behind his back. “Therein lies the problem. I am not certain I can be. There is something that strikes me as … different … about him, and I cannot say what it is. He has not behaved unusually. He has not spoken unusually.”

 

“And yet, your instincts are telling you something's off.”

 

Severus glanced up from his study of the floor, not having realized Lily had joined him where he stood, watching him with concern in her gaze. “Yes.”

 

“Well, those instincts kept you alive years ago, so there's no discounting them.”

 

“Perhaps not, but there is not much that can be done, either. Not without proof of anything.”

 

“So, we'll simply keep an eye on him. Unfortunately, I don't see him all that much, but I'll try to watch him when I'm around him. Unobtrusively, of course. I haven't exactly heard the most promising of things about him. The students all say the same thing. He's too timid to really teach them much of anything.”

 

Severus sneered. “I cannot understand why the Headmaster hired the man. From the moment I met him, I knew he would be no good at the subject.”

 

“I'm sorry to say, but I agree. I thought that maybe it was just nerves over teaching, but it's been nearly a month and he's still just as timid as he was at the beginning of the year.”

 

“Precisely.” Severus' eyes narrowed as he spoke almost to himself, “Too timid.”

 

“What are you thinking?”

 

“As you mentioned, Quirinus has always been nervous, but I have noticed of late, he is especially so … with me.”

 

Lily actually chuckled. “Well, Sev, you _can_ be rather intimidating, with your scowls of impatience and abruptness.”

 

Severus glared at her, but, to his annoyance, she remained unaffected. “I no longer am as impatient, nor as abrupt, as I once was. That is beside the point, however. He was not here in previous years.”

 

Lily reached up and slid a lock of his hair behind his ear. “Maybe not, but your reputation precedes you. It'll take some time before that changes.”

 

“Perhaps.” Severus paused, not certain if he should give voice to what he had seen. After all, there could be reasonable explanations for it. In the end, he plunged ahead. “I have … noticed him on the third floor … on more than one occasion.”

 

“He could be paranoid and merely checking on things. Personally, knowing that _it_ is here makes _me_ a bit paranoid.”

 

“Perhaps. I assume he has said nothing to you about it or that you have not overheard him say anything?”

 

“No.” Cupping his cheeks, she brought his forehead down to hers. “Like I said, we'll keep an eye on him.”

 

Closing his eyes, Severus wrapped his arms around Lily, breathing in the fruity scent that seemed to cling to her. Whether through shampoo or lotion, he really didn't care. The smell calmed him like none other, allowing him to put his mind at ease over the Quirinus puzzle. Unfortunately, another puzzle arose to take its place.

 

“Has Harry ever been adversely affected by dittany?”

 

Lily leaned back in his arms enough to look up at him properly. “What? No. Why do you ask? Did something happen?”

 

“I discovered he has a rather large area of irritation on his left arm. I used a dittany salve I had on hand and it instantly reacted, causing several large blisters to form. After flushing the area free of the salve, I wrapped his arm in gauze. I have never seen a reaction of that nature.”

 

“That's odd. I've used dittany on him a lot and never had a problem. How did you discover it?”

 

“I had noticed him scratching the same spot throughout class. When I inquired about it, he claimed it was a minor itch, but the manner in which he was scratching told me it was more serious than that. I forced him to show me.”

 

“Huh. Well, he always did manage to find stuff to get into when he was younger.” Lily rolled her eyes. “I think I've covered that boy head to toe in the stuff. I'm sure it's nothing.”

 

“I instructed him to go to Poppy if it worsened, otherwise he could remove the bandage in three days' time.”

 

Lily nodded, a smile playing about her lips. “His scratching is probably why it looked so bad. The reprieve will do the trick, I'm sure.”

 

“You could be correct.”

 

A certain gleam came into Lily's eyes and Severus knew exactly what it meant. Putting Harry out of his mind, he leaned in and captured her lips with his. A slight pressure against his chest had him walking them backwards toward their bedroom with only a long enough pause for him to extinguish the lights.

 

SSLE

 

His arm having quit itching, Harry removed the bandage on Thursday night after everyone had gone to bed… and his heart nearly stopped. The redness was gone, sure, but in its place was something infinitely worse. There, in all of its evil glory, was a four-inch replica of the mark his dad had been branded with, the only difference being that his was darker than his dad's. Breath hitching, Harry leaned against the lavatory wall, unable to tear his gaze from the skull and snake on his left arm. How in the bloody hell did it happen? Why? It was someone's idea of a sick joke, right? That's what Harry repeatedly told himself. What would his mum say if she saw it? Hell, what would his _dad_ say? Surely, his dad wouldn't think he was just trying to be like him. Harry _did_ want to be like him, but not like that! Never like that!

 

The squeak of the lavatory door opening sent Harry scrambling for a stall, locking the door and sitting on the toilet seat. What was he going to do? Panic tried to settle in his chest, bringing tears to his eyes, but Harry forced himself to take deep breaths. He couldn't show anyone. Neville would stop being friends with him. His mum and dad, they wouldn't believe that he had no idea how it appeared. Harry, himself, had a hard time believing it and he knew it was true! No, he'd just hide it and be extra careful to make sure no one ever saw it. Thankfully, the weather had cooled, so long sleeves weren't out of the question.

 

Once he was alone again, Harry dropped his head to the side of the stall. He felt like crying, but he wouldn't. He would just have to figure out how to deal with it. Pressing his fingers into his eyes to get rid of the wetness, he slipped out of the lavatory and into his dorm. Not the least bit tired, he quietly stuffed his books and writing utensils for the following day into his bag and took it downstairs. At one of the tables, he lit a lamp and sat with his arms folded on the tabletop, chin on his hands. For several minutes he debated writing to Ginny, but felt he needed to tell _someone_ , so he decided to risk it.

 

_Dear Ginny,_

 

_How are things? Classes are picking up here. Lots of essays. Dad has been helping Neville, you remember me mentioning Neville, right? Every Sunday, we've been going to the classroom so he can practice the potion we worked on in class. He's definitely getting better. Dad provided this spell that creates a beat to help you with the timing of brewing. Still not learning anything in Defense Against the Dark Arts or History of Magic. Professor Quirrell is just too timid and Professor Binns is a bore._

 

_Okay, I've stalled long enough. I need to tell you something, but I'm afraid to. I'm worried you'll read what I write and decide to stop being friends with me. If you do, at least tell me. Don't ignore me and leave me wondering, okay? Okay, here goes. A few days ago, my arm started itching. I didn't think anything about it, but it grew worse. Dad gave me some dittany salve and it hurt so badly! Dad instantly washed it off, but I know he was concerned about the reaction I had. He said he'd never seen anyone allergic to it. He bandaged it up and told me to keep it that way for a few days and that I could take it off if it wasn't worse._

 

_Well, I just took it off and you won't believe what I found. The redness is gone, but something else is there instead. It's a copy of the Dark Mark, Ginny. It looks just like Dad's, only mine is darker. Mine isn't as big as Dad's either, but I guess that isn't a surprise. My arm is smaller than his, after all. I don't know what to do, Ginny. I'm terrified of anyone seeing it. I have no idea how it got there! I certainly didn't do it. I don't want it there, but I don't know how to get rid of it. I'm afraid Neville will think I wanted it and won't want to be a friend anymore. Then, there's Mum and Dad. I don't want them mad at me, either. They won't believe that I have no clue how it happened, especially Dad. I just don't know what to do. Just keep it hidden, I guess. Please don't tell anyone and don't let anyone see this letter._

 

_Hoping you write back._

 

_Your friend (hopefully)_

 

_Harry_

 

Harry used a Quick-Dry charm on the ink, then folded the parchment and sealed it. Feeling a bit better for having said something, even if it was in a letter, he left his bag at the table and lay on the sofa, letting his mind wander as he stared into the glowing embers in the fireplace. Eyes growing heavy, Harry drifted off to sleep … only to jerk awake sometime later, chest heaving and heart pounding. He'd dreamed his mum had been disappointed in his choice to take the Mark and that his dad had disowned him for having it. His stomach felt queasy just thinking about it. He decided to read for a while until he thought he could sleep.

 

“Harry?”

 

Harry jerked upright, momentarily disoriented as to where he was. Neville stood next to him, looking anxious. “Oh, hi, Neville.”

 

“What are you doing down here?”

 

Harry turned to his books, picking up the letter he'd written. “Couldn't sleep so I wrote to Ginny. Go on to breakfast. I'm not that hungry this morning. I'm going to get dressed and then send this.”

 

“Are you sure you're okay? Is it your arm?”

 

Harry nervously gathered his things. “No, it's … it's fine. I'll see you later.” He rushed upstairs, nearly running into Weasley at the top of the tower .

 

“Watch it, Snape. I don't know why you're here. You don't belong in Gryffindor.”

 

Tired, Harry sighed, feeling a bit of a headache forming. “Don't start with me, Weasley. I'm in no mood to listen to your idiotic blathering. Now, step aside so I can get out of your way.”

 

After a second's hesitation, Harry realized Weasley wasn't going to move, so Harry made to go around him. As he stepped on the next stair up, a sharp yank sent him tumbling down to the landing below. For a moment, Harry could only blink and try to make sense of what just happened. Gingerly sitting up, he moved his arms and legs. A little pain, but nothing broken, at least. Shouldering his bag and clutching Ginny's letter, Harry began climbing the stairs again, warily eyeing Weasley as the boy passed him.

 

“What's the matter, Snape? You're the one who fell.”

 

“With your help.” Harry wasn't one hundred percent certain, but he was fairly sure.

 

“So you say. Whose word do you think they'll believe? The son of a Death Eater or the son of a pure-blood, upstanding family?”

 

Harry rolled his eyes. “Whatever.”

 

Stepping around Ginny's brother, Harry entered the dorm and proceeded to put away his bag. Letter still clutched tightly, he descended the stairs, glad Ron had disappeared, and left the common room. He made it down to the Entrance Hall without encountering anyone else who wanted to badger him. The doors to the Great Hall stood wide open. How was he going to get outside without his mum or dad seeing him? From their vantage point at the staff table, they could see all the way to the castle doors! A group of Hufflepuff fifth-years provided Harry the cover he needed as they crowded in front of the Great Hall doors. Harry took full advantage and slipped outside, rushing off to the owlery.

 

Calling softly to one of the school owls, he lifted his arm for it to land. “Give this letter to Ginny Weasley. She lives in Ottery St. Catchpole in Devon. It's best if you wait until she's alone, okay?”

 

The barn owl nipped his finger, took the letter and launched itself into the air, flying out the window. Harry watched as its form grew smaller with the distance. Well, there was no going back, now. She either would still want to be friends or she wouldn't. Leaning against the owlery wall, he pulled up his sleeve to stare at the hideous tattoo. Nothing had changed since last night. The skull still spewed from its mouth a snake looping itself into a figure eight. Despair tightened in his chest as he thought about everyone's reactions. He wished he could just hide out there in the owlery until Ginny's response came, but knew that would be the quickest way to bring his mum and dad into things, asking questions Harry just couldn't answer.

 

Approaching footsteps echoed up the stairs and Harry frantically pulled down his sleeve. Pushing himself away from the wall, he did his best to pretend he had just finished sending a letter, ignoring the Ravenclaw student that came looking for an owl, giving him the familiar odd look. Honestly, why did they continue giving him such looks? Weren't they used to him and the identity of his dad by now? Obviously, people were never going to get over it. Harry nearly snorted. They'd really stare if they knew the latest development.

 

Finding Neville on the grounds, apparently coming to the owlery, Harry suggested they visit Hagrid. “Maybe we can get something else from him. We still haven't figured out who Flamel is.”

 

“Sure. I can write to Gran, too, and see if she's heard of him.”

 

“Okay.” Harry smacked himself in the forehead. “I should have asked Ginny about him. Next time, I guess.”

 

The Gryffindor and semi-Gryffindor wandered over to Hagrid's hut, Harry rapping on the wooden door. When it swung open, a wall of heat nearly knocked him to the ground. “Hagrid, why is it so hot in there?”

 

Hagrid's beetle-like eyes darted around before ushering the two inside. “Come in. Hurry.” He slammed the door the instant Neville was out of the way.

 

Harry fanned himself in the oppressive heat. “Aren't you hot, Hagrid? Why do you have it so warm?”

 

Hagrid shuffled to his kitchen area to prepare them some tea. “I'll show you. Just wait.”

 

Harry didn't have long to wait. A sharp jab in his elbow drew his attention to his friend, who was staring, wide-eyed, into Hagrid's fireplace. There, nestled in the flames, was a a gray-black, oblong object. Harry's own eyes grew wide and he whirled back to the giant man.

 

“Hagrid, that's a dragon's egg! What the bloody hell are you doing with it? Those are illegal to have!”

 

“They are non-tradeable goods, yes, but I didn't trade for it.” Hagrid's bushy beard and mustache twitched as he beamed down at the students. “I won it from some shady fellow in a game of cards!”

 

Harry exchanged disbelieving glances with Neville, shaking his head. “Hagrid, that doesn't matter. It still changed hands. Who was that stranger? How did he get it?”

 

Hagrid shrugged his massive shoulders, bringing over a tea set and serving the hot drink. “Dunno. Never saw his face. Had his hood up, you see. I figured the egg was better off with me than with someone who had no idea how to care for it.”

 

“And you do?”

 

“Of course, I do, Harry! Been doing lots of reading about dragons. This is a Norwegian Ridgeback egg. I know exactly what to expect when it hatches.”

 

The thought of a baby dragon on Hogwarts' grounds terrified Harry. “You can't be serious about keeping it! Hagrid, dragons can't be tamed!”

 

“Besides,” Neville added, a tremor in his voice, “your house is made of wood. Dragons and wood just don't mix.”

 

Hagrid affectionately smiled down at the dragon egg in the hearth. “Oh, that doesn't matter. It won't harm me. I'll be its mummy.”

 

Now, Harry could understand his dad's frustration with the huge man. He'd overheard many times his dad complaining about Hagrid's tendency to brush off any concerns over what most people would consider dangerous. Huge creatures, for example. Beginning to feel overheated – and knowing any arguments over the dragon egg would be met with resistance – Harry decided to broach the subject he and Neville were more interested in learning about before he had to get out of there.

 

“Hagrid, have you heard any more about the Gringotts break-in? There's been nothing more in The Daily Prophet and I just find it odd that there hasn't been anything else said.”

 

Hagrid's genial gaze narrowed on him. “You need to forget all about that. I've already said more than I should have. Goblins investigate their own crimes, so don't think it some big conspiracy that you haven't heard more details in the paper.”

 

Harry perked up. “Are you saying a goblin was involved? I guess that would make sense. Goblins take you down to the vaults and they would know if someone had access to a particular one.”

 

Hagrid fidgeted, cleared his throat, and gruffly said, “I said no such thing. You two had best go and leave me to my duties.”

 

Sweating profusely by now, Harry quickly agreed. “Yeah, okay, see you later. Come on, Neville.”

 

Stepping outside felt like stepping into the middle of winter. Sighing with relief, Harry motioned for Neville to follow him over towards the lake. Dipping his hands into the water, he rinsed off his face, shivering a little as the coolness trickled underneath his collar. Neville copied his actions. Sufficiently cooled, Harry sat on a nearby boulder.

 

“He's going to get himself killed, Harry. Or worse, get someone else killed. Dragons are dangerous. They're given one of the highest classification rankings for a reason.”

 

“I know, but we can't tell anyone. There's no harm being done at the moment. Besides, when it hatches, we can use it as a bargaining tool for information. You saw how he reacted to my mention of Gringotts. He knows something. He's already let slip about this Flamel person and, now, that a goblin was involved in some way. Just imagine what else he might tell us if we keep his secret.”

 

Neville stared at Harry, looking as if he didn't know what to think. “That's blackmail, Harry.”

 

Harry smirked at his friend, a perfect imitation of his father's once-favorite expression. “Dad would say it was simply using information to our advantage.”

 

Neville chuckled and shook his head. “Sometimes, you're so Slytherin it's scary. If you were any more of a Slytherin, I'd be terrified.”

 

The Gryffindor boy didn't know it, but his words chilled Harry, lifting his good mood, reinforcing Harry's fears. So, that was it, then. Neville would be terrified of him if he knew the secret Harry kept from him. The other boy could never learn of it. Harry's throat attempted to close on him and he swallowed, hard. Folding his arms, he pressed his inner forearm against his chest, as if that would further hide the terrible skeleton in his cupboard, so to speak.

 

“Harry, what's wrong? Did I say something to upset you?”

 

Harry forced a smile onto his face. “No. Come on, it'll be time for Flying lessons, soon. We should go. I don't understand why they wait so long to start it.”

 

“Maybe to give us time to adjust to our other classes.” Neville shrugged, looking unsettled. “I really don't care to fly. I'm not that athletic. I also hate heights.”

 

“I'm sure they won't have us flying very far off the ground. Not for the first time. You don't have to be athletic, either. It's just a matter of controlling the broom. You fly as fast or slow as you choose. Same for height. I'll help you if you want.”

 

Neville looked dubious, but nodded. “Okay. I'll take your word for it.”

 

The two made their way over to the grassy area they knew the lessons would be taking place. Harry felt it a waste of his time, but had to prove to Madam Hooch he could handle himself on a broom before he would be exempted from the class. He'd offered to help Neville gain confidence in the air, though, so Harry decided he would continue attending after getting his exemption, at least until his friend didn't fear flying so much.

 

Harry nearly groaned when he saw they had the lesson with Slytherin. No doubt Malfoy would make trouble. Harry knew he had to be careful, to not let the whinging Slytherin goad him into anything. Madame Hooch, their hawk-like instructor – and Quidditch referee according to his parents – called for silence and began giving her instructions, demonstrating the proper way to call the broom and mount. Harry wanted to roll his eyes. Commanding your broom into your hand really wasn't that necessary, especially if it's resting on a broom stand, and anyone who had a proper broom would have some sort of stand. However, he went through motions anyway and his broom jumped into his hand, only one of a few that did.

 

Seeing Neville struggling, Harry encouraged him. “You can do it, Neville. I know you can. Remember, nothing will happen that you don't want to happen. Calling it to your hand will only bring it to you. Nothing else.”

 

Harry received a grateful smile for his efforts. “Thanks, Harry. _Up!_ ” The broom shot into the boy's outstretched hand with a loud _smack_. “I did it! I really did it!”

 

Harry grinned. “See? I told you.”

 

“Ten points to Gryffindor! Five to you, Mr. Snape, for encouraging a classmate. Five to Mr. Longbottom for having the courage to keep trying.”

 

Harry felt the weight of a glare and found three pairs of eyes on him. Gray. Blue. Brown. Malfoy always glared at him, so Harry was only marginally concerned. Same went for Ron Weasley, though it did amuse Harry that the boy sported a reddened spot across his cheek as if his broom had smacked him. Granger, the bushy-haired girl who had accused him of cheating, still hadn't managed to get her broom to follow her command. Harry could only guess that was why she currently stared at him so angrily. He shrugged. It wasn't his fault.

 

When it came time to fly, Neville overcompensated for his fear and shot high into the air. To Harry's horror, his friend lost his balance and fell off his broom. Harry simply reacted. Jumping onto his broom, he rocketed up toward the free-falling boy. As if catching a Snitch as it flew past, Harry's right hand darted out and grabbed the boy by the back of his robes, the sudden ceasing of Neville's momentum wrenching Harry's shoulder.

 

“Harry!” Both of Neville's hands clamped onto Harry's arm. “Don't let me fall!”

 

Between gritted teeth, Harry sought to reassure him. “You're okay, Neville. I won't.”

 

Pain radiated up and down his arm, and Harry knew he had to get Neville to the ground before his arm went numb. It was only a matter of time before it did; he had experienced this once before. Swooping down toward the ground, he could feel the numbness setting in, and silently begged the numbness to hold off a little longer. Madam Hooch met him in the air, took Neville safely onto her broom and flew alongside Harry until they touched the ground.

 

“Mr. Longbottom, are you okay?”

 

“I'm fine. Harry isn't, though.”

 

“Let me take a look, Mr. Snape.”

 

Harry backed away from her questing hands, gingerly holding his left hand against his right arm to stabilize it. “It's okay. I'll just go see Madam Pomfrey. I already know what's wrong.”

 

“Very well, Mr. Snape. Take another ten points for rescuing a fellow student. You fly very well. You are hereby exempt from my class.”

 

“Thanks.”

 

“Still trying to convince us you're a hero?”

 

“Mr. Weasley, that was highly uncalled for. Another comment like that from you and I will see to it you find yourself serving detention. Mr. Longbottom, escort Mr. Snape to the hospital wing.”

 

“No, it's okay. Neville should stay.”

 

The hawk-like flying instructor's hands went to her hips, her expression fierce. “I will not allow you to go on your own.”

 

“It's okay, Rolanda. I'll take him.”

 

Harry didn't know what to think of Professor McGonagall's appearance. She didn't appear angry, nor did she sound it. So, what would have brought her out here? He didn't have to wait long to find out.

 

“Thank you, Professor. Alright, Mr. Snape, off you go. Mr. Longbottom, back over here, please.”

 

As they walked back toward the main entrance, Professor McGonagall looked down at him, lips pursed. “I saw you from my office window. That was quite the foolish thing you did, and yet, brave of you as well. I'm sure Madam Hooch would have helped Mr. Longbottom.”

 

Harry winced as a spasm of pain went through his shoulder. “She was busy settling everyone else. I wasn't going to let Neville get hurt. Not when I told him nothing would happen if he didn't want it to.”

 

“Harry, what happened was not your fault.”

 

“Yes, it is, Professor. I told him he was the one in control, that he determined how high or fast he would go. But look what happened.”

 

“What happened was that he didn't concentrate. You know this from having flown many times before. To control a broom, one must concentrate until it becomes second nature.”

 

“I forgot to tell him that.”

 

“It isn't your job, Mr. Snape.”

 

The return to his last name compelled Harry to take notice of his surroundings for the first time since they had begun the trek back to the castle. They had reached the Entrance Hall doors; therefore, the professional distance Professor McGonagall put between them became necessary. Thankful for the fact that most of the students were in class, Harry mutely followed his current Head of House, still certain he was to blame for Neville's near accident.

 

Reaching the first floor, Harry heard a familiar voice drifting through an open doorway and winced. In order to reach the hospital wing, he had to pass right outside his mum's room. Harry hoped he could do so without being spotted. The last thing he wanted was for her to worry about him. Naturally, his and Professor McGonagall's footsteps echoed in the stone corridor drawing her attention. She poked her head out of the doorway, probably to see who was out of class.

 

“Mrs. Potter,” McGonagall greeted her. “I'm escorting Mr. Snape over to the hospital wing. Minor injury during Flying lesson today.”

 

Harry could feel her scrutiny even though he couldn't look her in the eye, not with the information he was keeping from her. For a long moment, he waited for her response, nearly holding his breath, letting it out slowly when she chose to speak to the professor.

 

“Thank you, Professor. He'll be in good hands.”

 

To Harry's relief, she returned to her students, though Harry was certain he would be seeing her soon. What would he do then? He couldn't look at her the few seconds he stood in front of her! How was he ever going to do it when there was nothing preventing a nice long conversation? Panic set his heart racing. How in the bloody hell did his dad do it all of those years? How did he look someone in the eye and lie to their face – and doing it convincingly? Harry knew he'd better figure it out and quickly. As they approached the double doors of the hospital wing, he began drawing deep breaths to slow his heart rate. He certainly didn't want to clue Madam Pomfrey into anything more than his shoulder being wrong.

 

Once Professor McGonagall informed Madam Pomfrey as to the nature of their visit, Harry's Head of House left him. Madam Pomfrey directed him to sit on one of the beds so she could examine his shoulder. Harry casually leaned back on his left hand to help brace himself against the pain he knew to be coming.

 

“Dislocated your shoulder from the looks of it.”

 

“Yes, ma'am. I already know what you have to do get back into place. I'm ready.”

 

“I wish I could offer you some Numbing Charms but it's important we know if sensation has returned to all parts of your arm.”

 

“I know. I've done this before.”

 

“Very well, then. On the count of three. One. Two.”

 

She never reached three. With a tap of her wand, the joint was pushed back into alignment. Harry screamed with the pain, a few tears trickling down his cheeks. Reaching with his left hand, he swiped them away, the pain receding somewhat, sensation returning in tingling fury. The matron, then, proceeded to squeeze each of his fingertips, asking if he could feel it.

 

“Alright, no lasting damage.” Madam Pomfrey produced a sling. “I do want you to wear this to remind you to give your shoulder a rest for the remainder of the day. See me tomorrow morning and I'll check the progress of the healing. If it's far enough along, you can leave the sling behind. If not, you'll need to wear it another day.”

 

“Yes, ma'am. Do I have to stay here?”

 

“I don't see why you should. Just keep the sling on and you'll be fine.”

 

The matron helped him get his arm into the sling, then fastened the strap around his abdomen to help keep the shoulder immobile. Harry thanked her before rushing out of the ward, utterly relieved she hadn't done any full diagnostics on him, not that he was certain his tattoo would show up, but it likely would since it appeared through the use of magic. That much Harry was completely certain of. Not wanting to bypass his mum's room again, he decided to go up to the library to find more information on Flamel. He fervently wished he could remember where he'd heard that name before, but the memory stubbornly refused to present itself.

 

At dinner, he met up with Neville. “Hey. How did the rest of class go?”

 

“It was okay.” Neville shrugged, not seemingly impressed with the subject. “I did fly a few feet off the ground, but I didn't enjoy it much. Malfoy was unbearable, showing off and muttering about you being able to fly as well as you can.”

 

Harry quirked an eyebrow. “Really? I had no idea my flying ability would irk him. I wish I had known.” Harry grinned wickedly. “I would have let him see me sooner.”

 

Neville chuckled but quickly turned anxious. “How's the shoulder?”

 

Harry could easily see guilt in his friend's gaze and waved away his concern. “It's fine. Madam Pomfrey is just being overly cautious. The sling is just for today. My shoulder will probably be healed enough tomorrow to not need it.”

 

“Oh. I hope so. How _did_ you manage to catch me? I mean, you may be taller than me, but I'm sure I weigh more than you do. You shouldn't have been able to catch me.”

 

“As soon as I grabbed your robes, I flew up a little to counter your fall. I think that, more than anything, is what hurt my shoulder.”

 

“But that doesn't make any sense. I would have thought I would have been pulled right out of your grasp.”

 

Harry shrugged his one good shoulder. “I don't know. Maybe by then Madam Hooch managed to put a charm on you to make you lighter. Or, maybe it was just adrenaline. I've heard people can do some amazing things during emergencies.”

 

Neville nodded his agreement with that. “That's true. I think we're about to be visited by your mum or the professor. They're both eyeing you.”

 

Harry sighed. “Figures. Mum saw me on the way to the hospital wing. When I left there, I went up to the library. She probably went looking for me once her class was finished.”

 

Harry picked at his dinner, worried over the coming visit from either of his parents. He still hadn't figured out how to look at them without nervously blurting everything out. Maybe if he asked his dad how he did it, there would be something helpful that Harry could use to accomplish the same thing. He'd have to be subtle about it, though. His dad was just too perceptive to ask outright.

 

“Not hungry? Is something wrong? You haven't eaten all day. I thought Madam Pomfrey had kept you so I didn't think about you not being here for lunch.”

 

Staring at his plate of shepherd's pie, Harry mumbled, “Maybe I'm trying to get sick or something. I just don't feel like eating.”

 

“Well, you have to eat something. Even if it _is_ a bite or two.”

 

Harry snorted. “Yes, Mum.”

 

His friend's insistence did have the result of Harry eating a few bites. Although, it was possible the knowledge that his parents were watching him had influenced his decision more than a little. Stomach practically in knots, Harry pushed his plate away and finished off his pumpkin juice.

 

“I think I'm going to go up to the dorm. I didn't sleep much last night. I'll see you later, okay?”

 

Neville eyed him closely as if trying to decide whether he was being honest with him. “Are you sure you're okay, Harry? You've been acting oddly all day. Are you avoiding me or something?”

 

“No! Nothing like that, Neville. I'm just tired. You're right. I've just felt … off … today. Like I said, maybe I'm trying to come down with something.”

 

“Well, alright. I hope you're better tomorrow.”

 

“Thanks.”

 

Not glancing up at the staff table, Harry all but ran from the Great Hall, and didn't stop until he had gained the second floor, confident by then that he wouldn't be followed by either his mum or his dad. By the time he reached the seventh floor, Harry's energy waned and shoulder ached. Giving the password, he carefully climbed into the common room, went straight up the stairs to his dorm, then, with difficulty, changed his clothes. Madam Pomfrey hadn't said whether he needed to wear the sling while he slept, but decided he would. Buckling the strap around himself first, he slid his arm into sling, then the main strap went over his head. He had to admit, his shoulder felt better with his arm in the sling than it had the few moments without it. Climbing into bed, he fell asleep rather quickly, though nightmares plagued him most of the night.

 

SSLE

 

_Dear Harry,_

 

_I'll get to the pleasantries in a moment. I need to say this first. You prat! Of course I'm not going to stop being friends with you over something you had no control over! That's something my brother would do! In case you haven't noticed, I'm nothing like my brother. Now, that I've said that, I have to say this. I'm so sorry, Harry. That's truly scary. Do be careful. Hold your head up high, though, because you did nothing wrong. You didn't want it; it was forced onto you._

 

_I know you don't want to hear this, but you really should tell your mum and dad. They'll know what to do. They're not going to hate you or be disappointed or angry or anything like what you're imagining. They'll believe you. You have to tell them. They may even be able to tell, somehow, who is responsible. Who knows? Maybe the mark can be removed. They can't do anything if they don't know something is wrong. Promise me! Promise me that you'll tell them. I'll give you three days, then I'll write to your Mum myself and tell her. I mean it, Harry. Oh, and tell Neville, too. He sounds like a good friend. From what I know of the Longbottom family, you know, their reputation, they're fair. By keeping this from him, you're taking away his chance to show you what kind of friend he is, and it shows you don't trust him. SHOW HIM!_

 

_Now, for the pleasantries. A lot of essays, huh? Yuck. Okay, so, I'm not looking forward to that. Defense Against the Dark Arts is terrible? Well, that seems to defeat the purpose of the class. I've never been overly fond of history, so I imagine I'd find that one boring no matter the professor. How's Charms? I think I'll like that class best. Potions may be okay if your dad is willing to help me, too._

 

_There's not much going on here. It's pretty much the same every day. Get up. Feed the chickens. Help Mum with breakfast. Spend some time on maths and reading. Help Mum prepare lunch and make the bread for dinner. Go swimming. Then, eat. Have a little fun with Mum and Dad. Go to bed. Wash. Rinse. Repeat. Believe it or not, it gets a bit boring after a while. It's kind of lonely, too._

 

_Anyway, you've stalled long enough. Go talk to your Mum and Dad._

 

_Still your friend,_

 

_Ginny_

_PS. Don't worry. I won't tell anyone._

 

“Good news, then?”

 

Harry looked up from Ginny's letter, oddly relieved, yet still anxious. “Yes.” He toyed with one corner before he looked up at his friend. “Neville, there's something I have to tell you about, something I've kept from you since I discovered it. I'm sorry I haven't said anything sooner. I'll explain, but I need to speak to my parents first.”

 

“Er, okay. I knew there was something going on, though.”

 

“I know, and I do feel bad for not saying anything. Like I said, I'll explain later. I'm going to go down to their quarters and wait for them.”

 

Standing, Harry finally glanced up at the table where his mum and dad sat, and, seeing they were watching him, he tilted his head in the general direction of the dungeon stairs, hoping they understood his meaning. They did. Harry made his way down to their private rooms, pacing the length of the sitting room once he had entered, too unsettled to merely sit and wait.

 

Twenty minutes later, the door opened and both of his parents walked in, his mum approaching him immediately. “What is it, sweetheart? You don't look as if you have been sleeping well, and I know you haven't been eating.”

 

Suddenly, Harry didn't have the energy to keep standing. “Can we sit?”

 

“Sure.”

 

Harry allowed himself to be pulled to the sofa where he and his mum sat. His dad took the armchair next to the sofa, the man's dark gaze speaking for him. Harry fiddled with the hem of his sleeve. He should just yank it up and show them, like ripping off a plaster. Inhaling deeply, he looked up at his dad.

 

“Remember that rash?”

 

“I do. How is it?”

 

“Well,” his voice wavered, “it's gone.” Harry gulped. “Let me just show you.”

 

Pulling up his left sleeve, he held his breath … and flipped his arm over.

 

SSLE

 

Severus reeled from the sight of the Dark Lord's brand on his son's arm. Fury the likes of which he had never felt before surged inside. Without saying a word, he stalked to his lab, entered, and slammed the door. He paced the length of the room, temper rising with each step. As he passed the cupboard that held all of his vials and empty bottles, he grabbed one of them and launched it across the room. The satisfying shatter compelled him to do it again. And again. _Not my son! This wasn't supposed to happen to my son! I failed him! Failed my own son! I should have known better than to try to be a father!_

 

Grabbing one of the few remaining vials, transfiguring it to form a glass, Severus grabbed the bottle of Black Balsam and poured himself a shot of the black-as-pitch, bitter brew, downing it one gulp.  He had discovered the unusual alcohol on a trip to Latvia to speak to a Potions Master there.  He rarely allowed himself a drink, preferring to keep it out of easy reach, meaning it stayed in the lab.  Its presence there also served as a reminder that he did not wish to become his father.  He poured himself another but left it sitting on the counter.  Hands flat on the table beside him, they took his weight as he leaned on them, head down, hair hiding an expression of misery and self-loathing. So lost in his thoughts was he that he never heard the lab door open, never heard the light approach of footsteps. Arms wrapping around his waist had him tensing completely. A giant lump formed in his throat, but he forced it down.

 

“Why are you here, Lily?”

 

“Well, since the smashing stopped, I thought it safe to come in.”

 

The fact she didn't seem to be taking this seriously exacerbated his bad mood and he sneered, letting loose with his biting tongue as he jerked away from her. “Such a Gryffindor-ish thing to do, to disregard the severity of the situation, to brush aside the truth simply because it didn't fit with what you wish to believe. In case it has escaped your notice, Lily, our son has been branded! Open your eyes and use your brain!”

 

“Severus … shut up.”

 

“I will not! Unlike you, I will not hide from what this means! He has been _branded_ , Lily!” Severus hated the way his voice shook with his last statement, but the lump in his throat had returned.

 

“I know exactly what this means.” Lily stepped closer and cupped Severus' face. “I know exactly what this means … to you. You think I don't see the guilt in your eyes? The fear? This was not your doing. We don't even know, for sure, that it is anything like the real Dark Mark. It could very well be a simple tattoo that someone thought would be a great joke.”

 

He felt ill as he looked into those beautiful green eyes. How could she possibly absolve him of any guilt? Though it hurt to say, he forced the words out. “It would have been better if you had not returned. He never would have faced the scorn and ridicule he has since coming here. And now this.”

 

“And he never would have learned what kind of man his father is.”

 

Severus tried to pull away from her, but she held him fast, and he practically snarled. “Oh yes, what a delightful job I have done! In a school known to be the second most secure location, I still failed at protecting him! _That_ is what he has learned.” Unable to look into her eyes any longer, he dropped his gaze, quietly muttering, “I failed him, Lily. It is as simple as that.”

 

Lily, to his shock, actually snorted. “Where you're concerned Severus, nothing is simple. You're human, Sev, just like the rest of us, and that means not seeing every danger that lies in wait. The first thing you need to do is to go talk to your son. He discovered it Thursday night but was afraid I would be disappointed in him and that you would hate him or think he wanted to be just like you. He does, by the way, but not like that. The next thing we should do is get Poppy down here to actually check it out.”

 

“Hate him? I could not. He is my son. I am the one deserving the hate.”

 

“So, go tell him that.” Lily turned him toward the door and prompted him with a little shove. “Go. I'll clean up your mess in here.”

 

Severus surveyed the glass shards littering the floor and grimaced at his utter loss of self-control. Facing the door, he realized he was a coward. He was a coward because he would rather deal with the broken glass than face his own flesh and blood. What terrified him the most was seeing the scorn that was bound to be in Harry's eyes. How could the boy _not_ hate him? Because Harry had been linked to _him_ , his son had been marked. It was like seeing his own childhood repeating itself and not being able to do a thing to stop his son from becoming, well, _him_. It was a vicious cycle, one that Severus had hoped would not repeat.

 

The first step was the hardest he had ever made. The second step came only slightly easier. The ones after that grew easier as he reached the lab door … until he caught sight of the dejected posture of his son sitting on the sofa, arms on his knees, head resting on them. _Oh, well done. What a fantastic father you turned out to be. In one moment, you have made your son feel worthless. When he needed you the most, you ran. Even I didn't run. Even I took several sessions to beat you down._ Severus gave his head a shake to clear his mind of Tobias' taunting voice. On quiet feet, he reached the sofa and gingerly sat beside his son, not certain of his welcome.

 

“Harry, I – ”

 

“I'm sorry, Dad.” Though Harry's voice was muffled, Severus could still hear the anguish in it, and guilt constricted his chest, but Harry, oblivious to Severus' emotions, continued pouring out his heart. “I'm sorry I didn't tell you as soon as I saw it. I know I should have. I was scared you would think that I wanted to follow that path or believed that stuff.”

 

“Harry, listen to me.” Severus grimaced at the hard edge in his voice and worked to soften it. “You have nothing for which to apologize. I, however, do.” That drew his son's attention, but Severus found he couldn't face him, so turned his gaze to the floor. “You were targeted because you are my son. I … failed … as a father. I regret not anticipating the backlash you would experience here simply because you are my son. You have suffered and for that I apologize. I wished for your time here at Hogwarts to be one of … frivolity … rather than one of pain as I had.”

 

“It's not your fault, Dad.”

 

Severus' dark eyes flicked to his son, a bit of his temper leaking into his voice. “If James Potter had been your father, you would not have the Dark Lord's mark burned into your arm now. You cannot possibly believe otherwise.”

 

“Mum says it could just be a tattoo, someone's joke or taunt. She thinks Madam Pomfrey should check it.”

 

Somewhat calmer, Severus ran a hand over his face, sighing. “Be that as it may, there is a certain … stigma … that comes with that mark.”

 

“I know, Dad. There should be, but you and I, we're not like that and we should hold our heads up high because we know the truth.”

 

One of Severus' brows rose. “That is … some mature thinking. I am impressed.”

 

A sheepish expression stole across Harry's features. “Don't be. I had help coming to that conclusion.” He rubbed the back of his neck. “I, er, wrote to Ginny about it. She told me that and that I should talk to you and Mum.”

 

“Sage advice. I am … glad … you followed it. Harry, no matter what it is that you do, I will never despise you. I may not always be happy with you, and my temper may get the best of me – a legacy from my father, to my great misfortune – but I could never hate the best thing that ever came from me.”

 

“Thanks, Dad.”

 

To Severus' supreme shock, his son hugged him! So stunned was he, that he remained motionless for a few moments. He'd never hugged anyone other than Lily. But then, he remembered that his son was eleven years old, still a child despite everything that had occurred and how well the boy had handled most of it. Severus recalled how he had felt as that age, looking for reassurance and support from whatever adult he could find. He had never found it, but he would not allow his son to feel the same insecurity, the same sense of floundering in a world that wanted little to do with him unless he could do something for them. Severus pulled his son close, willing to give the boy all the comfort he needed – and perhaps take some for himself as well.

 

Severus remained there, long after hearing the boy's breathing deepen into sleep, marveling at the son he had helped create, if only biologically. Lily had done the vast majority of the work by shaping him into the person he was now, hadn't she? How much was Harry's personality and how much was Lily's teaching? Regardless, he could see some of himself in Harry. Not just in physicality. On occasion, he had borne witness to Harry's snarkier side, something Severus had found highly amusing and had taken great pride in discovering. Greater still was his son's compassion, his willingness to help those who needed it, which had obviously come from Lily.

 

The lab door opening brought Severus out of his ruminations. Looking over, he found the woman he loved peeking out at them, a broad smile in place. “All settled, then?”

 

“Indeed.”

 

Lily quietly strolled over to them, ran a hand lightly through Harry's hair. “He's sound asleep. Let him rest for a bit and then we should call Poppy. He hasn't slept much in the last couple of nights.”

 

“Nor has he eaten. I will make arrangements for us to have lunch here.”

 

“Albus said – ”

 

“It matters not what the Headmaster wants. I will inform him that Harry is in need of us. If he chooses to admonish either of us for it, that is his prerogative, but he will know what the result of it will be.”

 

Lily's hand left Harry's hair to thread through Severus' instead as she perched on the sofa arm. “What do you mean?”

 

“My actions will not be controlled by him, not when it comes to you or to Harry. If the Headmaster so much as makes the attempt, I will resign my post.”

 

“And then what, Sev? If you don't teach, you can't stay here. You'd be out of reach if Harry needed you.”

 

“You would be here.”

 

“Yes, but the time when Harry needed his mother has passed. He's getting to the age where he'll need his father more.”

 

Severus leaned into her hand with a sigh. “Very well, I concede your point. However, the Headmaster will understand that you and Harry are my priorities.” Capturing her hand in his, he brought her palm to his lips for a light kiss. “The two of you are my life.” He glanced down at Harry. “Help me get him to his room.”

 

Together, they were able to get Harry tucked into bed without him stirring the least little bit. Severus then called on Poppy, requesting she come to lunch in his quarters, telling her only that her expertise would be needed at that time. Then, he and Lily relaxed on the sofa, not a word was spoken between them, but no words were needed. She toyed with and caressed the fingers of the arm holding her against him, while his free hand gently twisted and twirled a lock of her hair, allowing it slide silkily through his fingers, his cheek resting at her crown. It was something he had always done when she was close and he wanted to simply clear his mind for a while. It tended to work better than Occlumency, mainly because he could still feel. Contentment. Love. He could allow himself to fall into those emotions, let them sweep away everything else.

 

The emotional ride of the morning caught up with him and he, too, drifted off, though he awakened when Lily shifted. She shushed him when he started to speak and pulled his head back down to her chest, against her heart. Severus didn't fight it, just let the heartbeat and her gentle caresses lull him into slumber.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

  


 


	8. Careless Words

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hope you all enjoy. Still writing chapter 10 but hope to have it finished soon so that you all don't experience a really long wait for chapters.

**_Real love means seeing beyond the words spoken out of pain, and instead seeing a person’s soul._ **

**_\--Shannon Alder_ **

 

Severus' world tilted for the second time that day.  “It … what?”

 

Poppy gave Harry, Lily, then him a sympathetic look.  “It's linked to yours, Severus. Where yours was tied to You-Know-Who and acted as a summons, the one Harry has been given is more simple.  It cannot be used as any type of summons, but because the link between his and yours exists, what you would have felt from yours would have been echoed through his.”

 

That bit of information caused what little color Severus had to leach from his face.  He remembered all too well the pain that accompanied any summons, especially when the Dark Lord was particularly angry.  His son feeling even a fraction of that was unacceptable.

 

His dark eyes glittered with his determination.  “Break it. Find a way to sever that link. I will _not_ have my son experiencing that pain.”

 

“You don't think You-Know-Who is gone, then?”

 

Severus opened the cuff of his left sleeve and yanked it up, exposing his own inner arm and the lighter but larger copy of the Dark Lord's mark.  “If _He_ was gone, so would this be.”  

 

Generally, he avoided looking at the ugly thing, but his eyes were drawn to it and noticed something that utterly disturbed him.  The skull and snake was darker than he remembered. For a long moment, Severus could do nothing but stare. His mind didn't want to contemplate what its darkening signified, but he wasn't one to ignore things, so he forced himself to ponder the implication.  It could mean only one thing. The Dark Lord was stronger than he once was.

 

“It's darker.”

 

Lily's quiet declaration drew Severus' attention.  Though her gaze was locked onto his arm, he could see her fear.  Tugging his sleeve back into place, he busied himself with positioning the cuff just so before buttoning.  It was a stalling tactic, he knew, but seemed unable to help himself.  

 

“What does it mean that it's become darker?”

 

Severus met his son's gaze.  “It appears that the Dark Lord has been more active than previously believed.  Think, Harry. Madam Pomfrey has verified that my mark is a direct link to the Dark Lord.  What significance could its darkening possibly have?”

 

Poppy gasped.  “Severus, you don't mean – ”

 

Severus met the matron's shocked gaze, interrupting her denial.  “That is precisely what it portends.” He turned back to Harry. “Have you figured it out, Harry?”

 

Harry swallowed before looking up at him, dread in his eyes and voice.  “Voldemort's getting stronger, isn't he?”

 

Severus ignored the matron's wince at Harry's use of the name.  In all honesty, he considered his son far braver than he, himself, could ever be.  Not once had he ever uttered that name, not during his servitude, nor after, and here was Harry, saying it with no qualms whatsoever.  His son, the Gryffindor. If the circumstances hadn't been so dire, he would have chuckled at the irony. That did not prevent the pride at his son's insistence on using the Dark wizard's name from welling up within him.

 

“It appears so.”

 

“Does it, though?  No, Sev, don't look at me like that.  Hear me out.” Lily faced Poppy, her expression, from what Severus could see bordered on desperation, not that he could blame her.  “Is it possible that Severus' mark darkened because it had a sort of reinforcement? You said there was a link between Severus' and Harry's.  Is it possible that link is … feeding, for lack of a better term … Severus', therefore, making his darker?”

 

Poppy held her hands up in a placating gesture.  “I can't pretend to understand exactly how that particular magic works.  I'm not really the person to be asking; that area isn't my forte.”

 

Severus understood what she wasn't saying.  She wasn't versed in Dark magic. _He_ was the resident expert in that area.  “As much as it pains me to say it, I do not believe that to be the case, Lily.  Poppy's diagnostic shows the link to operate in one direction, from mine to Harry's.  It would have to be open in both directions for your theory to be valid.”

 

Lily whirled in his direction.  “And how would you know? You weren't privy to everything he did.  He could have used an obscure branch of magic no one has studied in centuries!”

 

Lily's refusal to accept what he knew, deep down, to be true, made Severus' head ache, shortening his temper.  Indicating his left arm, he snapped, “ I was a part of his Inner Circle, one of his most trusted, Lily. Contrary to what you choose to believe, being considered one of his elite had privileges.  Namely, the knowledge of what he did and when he did it, save for only one thing.”

 

“And proud of that, are you?”

 

“Mum!”  Harry's shocked cry mingled with Poppy's, “Lily!”

 

A deep ache lodged itself around Severus' heart.  Never had he thought to hear that accusation come from Lily.  It felt like a slap to his face and a punch to his stomach all in one.  Standing and putting some distance between himself and them, wishing he had his cloak and jacket, he crossed his arms over his chest, his posture rigid.  Burying his emotions as he had learned to do all those years ago, he continued the conversation, his lack of inflection speaking more than even his stance did about his emotional state.

 

“The magic involved with the Dark Mark is a perversion of the Protean Charm.  Nothing more, nothing less. Magic, itself, is neither Dark or Light. The intention is what makes it so.  Just as one can perform a Light spell with Dark intentions, so can a Dark spell be used for Light intentions.”

 

Lily stood, facing him, features twisted in remorse.  “Sev, I – ”

 

Too wounded to want to listen to her offered apology, Severus continued, his chin lifting in the way that all but screamed to those who knew him well that he would not be coerced into anything.  “Regardless, the fact remains that the Dark Lord is gaining strength. I, for one, feel it necessary to do some investigating to discover precisely how it is being done. The Headmaster should be informed.”  His features twisted into a sneer, and he lashed out as he often did when hurt or angry. “You do what you do best, Lily. Take Harry and run. Perhaps I shall see you again in another ten years.”

 

Severus donned his jacket, magically taking care of the buttons, before throwing on his robe.  Glancing back at the others, he noticed Lily still standing, tears trickling down her cheeks. The sight fractured the armor he had locked his turbulent emotions behind.  Mentally strengthening that wall, Severus looked away from her, knowing he had hurt her, but he had wanted her to feel what her words had done to him. He swept from his quarters, robe billowing behind him.  The Headmaster did need to know what had been discovered so appropriate actions could be taken. The fact that notifying the man took him away from the mess he had left behind was a bonus. He simply could not deal with that yet, not until he had a plan of action, not until he knew that something was being done to locate the Dark Lord.

 

SSLE

 

Harry watched his dad practically flee from them.  Having observed his dad a lot since he'd met him, Harry had come to read him fairly well and knew his dad had been thoroughly hurt by his mum's words.  How could she have said that? Did she actually believe that he _was_ proud of what he had done?  Didn't she understand him at all?

 

He stood to face his mum, folding his arms over his chest defiantly, looking very much like his father.  “I can't believe you said that to Dad!”

 

“Me, neither.”  Harry heard her sigh.  “I didn't mean to, and I certainly don't believe that he would be.  He despises his past as much as anyone could.”

 

“Then, why did you say that?  You hurt him. He's done a lot for us since you brought us back here and you pay him back by asking if he was proud of what he did back then!”  His mum whirled to face him, obviously angry with him, but Harry didn't care.

 

“Don't take that tone with me, Harry!  I made a mistake, one that I will fix. I don't need _your_ attitude.  I swear, sometimes, you are just like your father!”

 

“Good!  The world can use more people like Dad, willing to stand up for what they believe in, even if it's not the popular opinion.”

 

“I know that jab was aimed at me.  Sweetheart, you just don't know what it was like during the first war.  Things were bleak. You can't fault me for not wanting that to come about again.”

 

Harry sighed and relaxed his stance, stuffing his hands into his pockets.  “No, I can't, but you have to trust Dad. Out of everyone here, he's the only one who knows Voldemort well enough to be able to interpret what some things mean.”

 

Harry didn't protest when she ran her hand through his hair and smiled down at him.  “Right you are, of course. How did you ever get to be so wise? With thoughts like that, you should have been in Ravenclaw.”

 

Harry wrinkled his nose but laughed.  “Nah. I like where I'm at. People don't know how to handle me being in two Houses.  Except for the scorn from some, everyone else has just sent me looks or have ignored me.”  Harry shrugged. “It's kind of fun, really, because they don't know whether to be wary of me or to like me, especially when I do something that is the complete opposite of what they think someone in that House would do.”

 

Lily laughed and hugged him.  “And there's your father's influence.”

 

Harry looked up at his mum, filled with anxiety.  “You _will_ talk to Dad, won't you?  Get him to see that you really don't think that way about him?”

 

“Of course, I will, Harry.  Your father is a stubborn, mulish, hardheaded, contrary, obstinate – and every other synonym I can think of – man, so it may take a day or two.”

 

“Okay.  I told Neville at breakfast that I would explain things to him.  I'm sure he's wondering what's going on since I didn't show up for lunch.  May I go?”

 

“Of course, you can.  I'll see you later at dinner … in the Great Hall.”

 

“Okay.  Bye, Mum.”

 

Harry raced out the door to try to find Neville, hoping things would go more smoothly this time around.

 

SSLE

 

Neville gawked at Harry's arm as they sat in an unused classroom.  “Merlin, Harry! No wonder you've been acting all weird! And it just appeared?”

 

Harry hurriedly pulled his sleeve back into place, nodding.  “That's what became of the rash I had.”

 

“And you told your Mum and the professor about this, right?”

 

Harry sighed, thinking about the mess that was the current state of things.  “Yeah. Dad didn't take it so well. He disappeared into his lab … and smashed stuff.  I swear, I've never seen him that angry. Then, Mum went in. I guess she talked to him because he came out and we talked.”

 

“He wasn't mad at you, was he?  He shouldn't have been.”

 

“No.  He was furious that it happened at all.  He said he had wanted my experience here to be different than his.”

 

“That's good.  What about your mum?”

 

“She scolded me for not coming to them in the first place.  Of course, she's upset that it happened, too. She had a few choice words, let me tell you.”

 

“So, why weren't you at lunch?”

 

Harry grinned a bit sheepishly.  “I kind of fell asleep after talking with Dad.  The next thing I knew, Mum was waking me up in my room telling me to come have lunch.  Madam Pomfrey was there.”

 

“Oh?  Why?”

 

“She checked it and said that it's not a real one, that it doesn't act like how Dad's did, but she discovered something else.  She said mine's linked to Dad's. In other words, any pain he felt in his would be transmitted to mine.”

 

Neville looked horrified at the thought.  “Do they know who did it?”

 

“No.  There was no way to find that out.  It had to be someone older, though, someone with enough magical ability.”  Harry fiddled with his sleeve, debating on whether to mention the rest, but Neville had been a great friend so far, so he decided to tell it all.  “Dad's mark has gotten darker. He thinks it means Voldemort is gaining strength. Mum … she questioned him. She actually accused him of being proud of the things he did.”

 

“She what?  She doesn't really think that, does she?  I mean, surely, she doesn't. I may not know the professor very well, but even I don't think that about him.”

 

Sighing, Harry plopped back against the wall.  “No, she doesn't, but I don't know if it will matter.  She said it and Dad was very hurt by it. He practically ran from us to talk to Professor Dumbledore.  I don't think he'll want to listen to Mum any time soon.” Pulling his knees up to his chest, Harry softly confessed, “I'm kind of scared that things won't go back to how they were, that there will always be this distance between them.”

 

“I'm sorry, Harry.  I know that doesn't help, but – ”

 

Harry shrugged.  “It's alright. There's nothing I can do about it.” 

 

“Harry, I – ”

 

Whatever Neville had been about to say was lost to the loud crash in the corridor, followed by a maniacal laugh.

 

Harry cringed.  “Peeves. Come on.  I still have History of Magic homework to finish.  Besides, the mood Dad's in right now, best not to be anywhere he might be.”

 

“Alright.  It'll probably take us right up to dinner to finish that assignment anyway.  I wish we would learn something more than goblin wars. I mean, I know that's important, but surely a lot of other stuff has happened in Wizarding history that's just as important.”

 

“Yeah, but can't change that, either, so I guess there's no use complaining.”

 

As they drew close to the end of the corridor, some older students' voices drifted to them from around the corner.  “Hey, Montague, beware of Professor Snape. He's in a foul mood today. He took points for making too much noise and all I did was drop my book.”

 

Harry recognized the voice and the name as belonging to a couple of Slytherin's older students.  If they only knew what had set his Dad off … Then again, it's possible they did know. After all, it would have taken someone more experienced to be able to cast the curse that had given him the replica Dark Mark, and most likely, it had been someone from Slytherin.

 

There came a snort.  “Trouble in paradise,” came the sneering response.  “The professor should have known better than to consort with Mudbloods.  Use them for entertainment if you must, but don't _breed_ with them.  Nothing good ever comes from it.”

 

Incensed, Harry barreled around the corner, ready to lambaste the two for daring to speak of his mum in such a manner, but stopped short when he realized his mum had stepped out from a side corridor behind them.

 

“And the two of you should have known better than to indulge in gossip, especially here in the open where anyone can hear you.”  The two Slytherin boys startled spectacularly and paled when they saw one of the objects of their gossip standing not far from them.  “I know for a fact your Head of House has laid out some ground rules dictating Slytherin behavior, and I'm willing to bet that gossiping in the corridor is not on that list.  Twenty points each from Slytherin for violating those rules. Unless, of course, you'd rather contest my discipline, in which case, this would go directly to your Head of House and _he_ would be choosing your punishment.”

 

Harry grinned gleefully.  His mum could be a complete Slytherin when she wanted to be.  He nearly laughed at the stuttering acceptance of the points loss by Flint and Montague.  Once the two teens had left, Harry turned to his mum, allowing the laughter the take over.

 

“That was brilliant!  Sometimes, Mum, you're very much a Slytherin.”

 

“I've learned from the best.”  Her teasing grin dimmed a little, but brightened again, though Harry could see it was forced.  “It's called self-defense. When the two most important people in your life are Slytherins, you pick up a few things.”  Harry started to point out he wasn't fully Slytherin, but his mum interrupted him. “I know what you're going to say, Harry.  Believe me, you're more Slytherin than you realize and there's nothing wrong with that.” Her gaze darted between Harry and Neville.  “So, did you …”

 

Harry nodded.  “He knows.”

 

“Well, then, that's good.  For being a true Gryffindor and a true friend, Mr. Longbottom, take twenty points.”

 

Neville's jaw dropped.  “Thanks!”

 

“We're going to go finish our History of Magic assignment.”  Harry rolled his eyes and groaned. “More goblin wars.”

 

“I know, and I'm sorry.  Just … read the text and you'll do well enough.”

 

Harry nodded pensively at her suggestion.  Looking up, he apprehensively asked, “So, I guess you haven't talked to Dad yet.  Not if Flint and Montague's comments are anything to go by.”

 

His mum sighed heavily.  “No, I haven't.” She huffed in irritation.  “I have to find him first. I swear, it's as if he's pulled a disappearing act.  I've been all over the castle _and_ the grounds.  Nothing.” Her smile returned, albeit a bit strained.  “Don't worry, Harry. I _will_ find him and we _will_ work this out.  We were bound to argue at some point.  It happens.”

 

“I can't help it.  I just want things back the way they were.”

 

“And they will be, Harry.  I promise. Go work on your schoolwork.  No sense leaving it all until tomorrow.”

 

Harry really wasn't in the mood to concentrate on something that could very well put him to sleep but he gave in, knowing Neville still had a lot of it left to do.  “Okay. I'll see you at dinner.”

 

SSLE

 

Lily sighed as she watched Harry and Neville walk away.  She wasn't that confident she had assuaged Harry's fears.  If only she had a Time-Turner. She could go back, and somehow, stop herself from throwing those words at Severus.  She didn't have a clue why she'd said what she had. She truly hadn't meant it. Even after all this time, Severus occasionally startled awake after a nightmare.  Something to do with Voldemort, she knew, but she hadn't yet been able to get him to talk about that part of his life. That was why she believed with her entire being that he regretted the things he had taken part in.  Now, she just had to find the tough, willful, ornery, dignified, honorable, _worthy_ man and make him believe her.

 

By dinner, Lily still had no luck finding Severus and cursed the size of the school, with its numerous corridors and shortcuts.  They could have passed each other and she would never have known it. As she sat at the staff table, the chair beside her empty, she even wondered if he would come to the evening meal or skip it to avoid her.  If she had known when she woke up this morning what the day would bring, she would have stayed in bed and pulled the duvet over her head. But that was the point Severus was trying to make, wasn't it? She sometimes _did_ try to ignore or avoid things she didn't like, looking for other reasons for explanations.  She couldn't do that now, not with something as important as Voldemort's return, for she knew he would one day.  Like Severus and Albus, she didn't believe the prophecy her son lived under had been fulfilled.

 

Lily picked at her dinner, each bite she choked down feeling like lead in her stomach.  A vast majority of the students had arrived and there still was no sign of the man she loved.  She kept her head down, not wanting to mistakenly invite conversation, and forced herself to remember the chat she had with Poppy after Harry had left that morning.

 

_Lily turned from the door and startled, having forgotten Poppy was still there.  The sobs that she had forced back earlier came crashing in on her, and she dropped to the sofa, head in her hands.  “Oh, Merlin, what did I do? Why did I say that to him? I don't even believe it, not for a second.”_

 

_“Don't you?” Poppy asked as she sat next to Lily.  “It had to have been lurking in there somewhere for it to have come out.”_

 

_Lily's head flew out of her hands so she could glare at the matron.  “No. I know he hates the things he did. Hell, he even has nightmares about them sometimes!  I guess I was just getting so frustrated at his unwillingness to even consider there was a different reason for his mark becoming clearer.  Oh, God, Poppy, I hurt him … badly.”_

 

_“Yes, you did.  Not irrevocably, however.  Just like with every other Severus storm, you'll have to weather its immediate effects, but it'll wear itself out.  You know this from experience. He won't close himself off entirely from you. He loves you and Harry too much for that.”_

 

_Lily shook her head, feeling absolutely miserable.  “I'm not so sure of that.”_

 

_“He responded in kind, didn't he?  Lashed out at you before he left?” At Lily's nod, she continued.  “You know as well as I do that he wouldn't have bothered if he felt nothing for you.  Not that I'm condoning what he said. Just the fact that he did is telling.”_

 

_“Unless it was contempt.  He responds to that.”_

 

 _“Yes, but you didn't see what I saw when he looked at you before he walked out.  You may have seen anger; I saw regret. When he said what he did, you heard contempt, but I heard desperation_.”

 

_“So, how do I make this right?”_

 

_“Talk to him.  It won't be easy to get past the wall he's probably put up, but you'll manage.  The two of you will get through this and be even stronger once you reach the other side of it.”  Poppy offered Lily a little smile. “With two people as stubborn as you both are, I'm surprised this is the first real argument you've had.  I'm sure it won't be the last one. It's been an emotionally trying day. Don't judge your relationship on today. What's been discovered would be enough to throw even the most easy-going of people into a volatile tailspin.”_

 

Brisk footsteps approaching the staff table broke Lily from her reverie.  She didn't need to look to see who it was. Even if he hadn't been the only one left to arrive at the table, she would have known it was Severus.  Only he could put so much confidence and dignity into his footfalls so effortlessly that each tap of shoe on stone practically screamed them. He said not a word to her or anyone else, offered no explanations as to his tardiness.  It disheartened her to realize how careful he moved so that he didn't accidentally touch her. Severus hadn't just erected a wall to keep his feelings behind, he'd built a safe, inside a stronghold, surrounded by steel walls, and protected by Hungarian Horntails  … with dementors guarding _them_.

 

The instant it was acceptable to leave, Lily did so.  She escaped to a lavatory, locked herself into a stall, and let the tears come.  It was all her fault. Words she didn't mean, carelessly spoken, had brought this wedge between them.  Despite what Poppy said, Lily wasn't so sure this could be fixed. She feared she had hurt Sev too deeply.  With everything within her, she hoped Severus didn't put distance between himself and Harry. She deserved his scorn; Harry did not.  Swiping her face clean, Lily splashed water onto her cheeks, hoping to hide the evidence of her misery.

 

Stepping out into the corridor, her feet took her in the direction of the dungeons before she abruptly stopped.  She wouldn't be welcome, not now. What should she do? All of her clothes were down there. Did she dare go retrieve a few articles?  And if she ran into Severus? Well, Poppy did say to talk to him, but would he listen? If his little display at dinner was anything to judge by, he wouldn't listen to anything she had to say.  Maybe she'd just wander the corridors or grounds for students who were where they shouldn't be. That seemed safer. Fully aware she was doing exactly as Severus had accused her of, she headed out into the cool evening.  She simply felt if she confronted him now, more hurtful things would be exchanged.

 

Lily allowed her feet to go wherever they chose and found herself down by the lake.  Listening carefully for signs of human life, all she heard was the water lapping at the shore and some owls hooting in the distance.  Just to be certain, she checked the surrounding bushes, but no students hid there. She, next, wandered over to the Quidditch pitch, thinking it had some nice deep shadows in which a couple of students looking for some privacy would go.  By the time she'd finished inspecting every inch, it had turned rather chilly, a stiff wind blowing her hair into her face. Shivering, she decided it was time to get back inside, patrol the corridors.

 

Up on the third floor, she came face to face with Quirinus.  For a moment, she thought she saw frustration in his eyes, but in the next instant, it was gone and she wondered if she'd imagined it.    “Oh, hello. I didn't realize you had patrol tonight. I've been meaning to ask you. How's Harry doing in class?”

 

“Oh, er, f-fine.  He's j-just f-fine.”

 

Keeping her voice light, she said, “That's good to know.  If that should change, do me a favor and let me know, would you?  I'd hate for his marks to decline needlessly.”

 

“I-I w-will.  C-Certainly. Well, I-I should g-go now.”

 

“Of course.  Have a good evening.”  

 

Lily watched her fellow professor disappear the way she had come before turning towards the corridor he had come from.  That way led to … No, surely he hadn't. Best to be certain. She made her way down the dark, winding corridor, lighting her wand.  Coming to the door, she checked to see if it had been opened in the last few minutes. No sign of it being disturbed, so, what had Quirinus been down here for?  Was it possible he'd heard her footsteps and aborted whatever it was he had planned to do? Or was she reading more into it, Severus' suspicions feeding her own?

 

She had proof of nothing so Lily continued on her meandering walk through the castle, shivering as the wind blew through.  For being a solidly built structure, it certainly was drafty. She'd forgotten how chilly the castle could be at night, even during the warmer months.  By the time she'd reached Gryffindor tower, she could feel her energy waning. It had to be late; she just didn't know how late. She still wasn't sure where she should go for the night.  Poppy would lend her a bed, but did she really want the hassle and the disappointed looks that would bring? Not particularly.

 

There were lots of unused corridors down in the dungeons.  That would put her close enough to duck into Severus' quarters once he left and grab some clothes, maybe a quick shower.  It took her much longer to reach the dungeons than usual; she was ready for some sleep. Finding a little nook in an unused corridor, Lily settled in, casting Cushioning Charms on the wall and the floor.  She told herself she was being all kinds of stupid, but she just couldn't force herself to face Severus and be rejected again. Yawning, she rubbed her arms at the ever-present dampness down there and closed her eyes.

 

SSLE

 

“Damn it, Lils.”

 

The softly spoken expletive roused Lily somewhat.  “Wha-?” Suddenly being lifted woke her completely.  “Sev? What are you doing? Put me down. I'm fine.”

 

There came a little snort.  “Your definition of the word obviously differs from mine.  You are rather cold.”

 

“I'll be fine.”

 

Noticing where they were heading, Lily wriggled to free herself from his grasp despite the warmth she could feel through his clothes – or tried to.  He wouldn't let her go. “Sev, you can put me down.”

 

“I think not.”  He remained silent until they were back in his quarters and set her in a chair near his blazing fireplace.  Then, he disappeared for a moment, only to return with the duvet from his bed and tucked it around her, remaining on his knees as he faced her.  “Why did you not come in, Lily?”

 

Lily bit her lip, looking away, fighting the tears that suddenly blurred her vision.  “I, er, wasn't sure I'd be welcome. I figured I'd wait out the night and duck in after you'd left.”

 

Severus ran a hand over his face, sighing.  “Lily, regardless of what may be occurring between us, you are always welcome here.”

 

That shocked her.  The shocks kept coming when Severus rose, walked to his kitchen and proceeded to make some tea.  For the few moments he was busy, Lily snuggled in the chair, hastily wiping the moisture from her eyes.  Maybe she hadn't completely messed things up between them after all. Maybe now would be a good time to talk things out.  A pair of sneezes took her by surprise. Beginning to feel too warm, she shoved off the duvet.

 

Severus returned with the tea and a small vial on the tea tray.  Lily eyed the potion warily, prompting him to snort. “Simply a modified Pepperup.  No undignified steam. Take it.” Lily opened her mouth to insist she didn't need it, but he cut in, brow raised.  “Arguing with me again, Lils?”

 

Utter relief.  That was what Lily felt at the return of her nickname.  She didn't know whether to burst into tears, laugh, kiss him, or do all three.  She settled for a sniffle, one corner of her lips lifting slightly, and brushing at her eyes.  

 

“You know me, Sev.  Sometimes, I don't know when to shut up.”  Meeting his eyes was one of the hardest things she'd ever done, but she did it.  Well, here goes. “Sometimes, I say things when I'm desperate or frustrated … or angry … that I don't mean.  I swear I didn't mean what I said. Please, forgive me.”

 

She held her breath as he knelt before her, one hand coming up to cup her cheek, thumb wiping away a tear that had escaped her control.  “Only if you forgive me for what I said to you. Ten years ago, I had given you no reason to stay. You were right to take Harry and go. I should not have made it sound as if you had a choice.”

 

Reaching up, she covered his hand with hers, tucking her fingers under his palm, hope and love bubbling up inside when he closed his hand, trapping her fingertips.  “You're right, though. I do, at times, want to ignore what's right in front of me or make excuses, find other explanations. I also think you're right about Voldemort gaining strength.  The thought scares the hell out of me, but it's the only thing that truly makes sense.” She drew in a deep breath, letting it out slowly. “I think that's ultimately what made … _that_ … come out of my mouth.  The absolute fear that you're right, that you were right and it was pointless to look for another reason.”

 

“To hear that … from you … hurt.  I never expected such an accusation to come from you.  I had thought you knew I look at those times with regret and loathing.”

 

“I do know that.  Really, I do. I know the things you did still haunt you in your dreams.”

 

“I spent the afternoon thinking about everything, wondering how things could have gone so wrong.  I realized the manner in which I left did little to improve the situation. I did the exact thing I accused you of doing.  I searched for you, but never saw you. Then … dinner. I was not assured of my own reception, therefore thought it best to keep to myself until we had the opportunity to discuss things.”

 

“You seemed so distant, making certain to not look at me or touch me, not even accidentally.  I thought I had ruined things, that you hated me. I just hoped that you wouldn't keep Harry away.”

 

“Hate is the one thing I could never feel towards you, Lils.  Everything else … perhaps. Not hate. I love you too much for hate to gain even a handhold in my heart.”

 

Then, in Lily's opinion, Severus did the most beautiful thing.  He gently pressed his lips to hers. In that one kiss, all was ultimately forgiven, walls obliterated, a deep abiding love reinforced.  After lingering for several moments, he leaned away.

 

“Take the potion.  Drink your tea. Then, we can sleep.”

 

Lily glanced at the clock on the mantel and did a double-take.  Three o'clock in the morning! Her gaze flew to Severus. “Why were you awake?”

 

A small smile curled one corner of his mouth.  “Searching for you. It was too quiet and lonely without you.  If we did not get things straightened out between us, that was how I could expect the rest of my life to be, and I could not accept that.”

 

“I don't want that, either.”  Hesitantly, Lily asked, “So, are we … okay … now?”

 

“I believe that to be the case.  We have successfully navigated through our first real argument since you returned.”

 

Lily chuckled as she picked up the tiny vial.  “A Severus storm as Poppy put it. It was her way of convincing me that you hadn't meant what you'd said, either, that I should know how you respond to emotional pain.  Of course, I pointed out that you tend to react the same when faced with contempt, but she was adamant that wasn't the reason for your insult.” Popping the tiny cork, she downed the potion, marveling at its distinct lack of bitterness.

 

“I completely forgot she was present.”

 

“So had I at the time.”  Now that the tea had cooled enough to drink fairly quickly, she downed it.  “Come on. I'm exhausted.”

 

When Severus stood, he tugged lightly on the hand he still held.  Lily followed the motion to her own feet, then, unable to curb the impulse, wrapped her arms around his waist and buried her face into his chest.  His arms immediately folded around her, pulling her close, bringing a broad grin to her face that quickly morphed into a yawn. She wanted to protest when he slipped from her arms, but he merely grabbed the duvet and led her in the direction of the bedroom.  Donning something more comfortable for sleeping, Lily climbed into the bed beside Severus, snuggling into his side.

 

Her hand splayed across his heart, she whispered up at him, “I love you.”

 

His fingers combed through her hair and she felt a kiss pressed to the top of her head.  “I love you. Always.”

 

SSLE

 

The bed suddenly jerked beneath her, waking Lily from a sound sleep.  From somewhere near her hip, harsh breaths came fast and furiously. Sitting up, she pressed a hand to the back that faced her, the damp muscles tensing at her touch.

 

“Sev?  Talk to me.”

 

Instead of speaking, Severus bolted around the bed and out the door.  Lily heard the door to the lavatory slam shut. The nightmare must have been horrific if it had sent him rushing to the loo.  Pulling on her dressing gown and a pair of slippers, Lily wandered out to the sitting room and lit the fire, then walked over to the cupboard where Severus kept his potions.  Measuring out a dose of Calming Draught, she prepared some tea. She hoped he'd willingly share with her what his mind had tortured him with this time.

 

To her everlasting shock, Severus joined her in the kitchen, took her in his arms and held her tightly, almost desperately against his chest, his entire body trembling.  She could just barely make out the words he muttered repeatedly under his breath. _It wasn't real_.  Lily slid her arms around him, hoping to give him the comfort he badly needed, one hand lightly running up and down his back.  She vowed to get him to talk, at least about this one. If the dream had been bad enough to have to remind himself it wasn't real, then he definitely needed to share it.

 

Again, he surprised her when he spoke, his voice hoarse, as he continued to hold her, not meeting her eyes.  She had the impression it was easier for him that way. “I dreamed _He_ was back.  I was surrounded by my former associates.  The Dark Lord, he … tortured you in front of me to … punish … me for my sins of loving you and turning from him.”  Severus shuddered and Lily held him tighter. “I felt helpless. Your screams … I could not reach you. He had Harry and … laughed, happy with the mark on Harry's arm.  While staring at me, gloating, he turned the mark into a true Dark Mark but kept the link between his and mine. He … did something to mine that made it burn intensely, like a Cruciatus almost.  I could hear Harry's screams of pain, but there was nothing I could do to help him.”

 

Tears poured from Lily's eyes as she imagined the torture it must have been for him to see that, even if it had not been real.  It had been real enough, and no doubt, had felt very real. She cupped his face, fingers threading through his hair, and pulled him down for a light kiss to his forehead, nose, then lips.

 

“I'm so sorry.  That sounds horrifying.  Just remember. It wasn't real.”

 

“Not yet.”

 

Lily slid her hands to the back of Severus' neck, lacing her fingers together and gave him a little shake, her expression turning fierce.  “Not ever.”

 

“You cannot say that with any certainty.”

 

“I _can._ Do you want to know how?  Because I know that either of us would die before Voldemort ever got his hands on our son.  So, you see? Your dream has no chance of coming true.”

 

“Please do not say that.  You died once before. I do not think you would be granted another reprieve from death.”  Severus tangled his hands in her hair, cupping the back of her head in one hand. “Believing you were lost to me nearly killed me.  I cannot experience that again … not if I were to survive.”

 

Lily gently smoothed the furrow in Severus' brow with a gentle touch, giving him a tender smile.  “You won't. You know I'm right, though. If it became necessary in order to keep Harry safe … ”

 

“Naturally.  However, the goal is for that _not_ to be necessary.”

 

Lily couldn't help a little chuckle.  “Naturally.” Stifling a yawn, she poured Severus a cup of tea and held up the dose of Calming Draught.  “Perhaps an Invigorating Draught would be more appropriate. It's nearly time for breakfast.”

 

She grinned when he groaned, rubbing his eyes with thumb and forefinger, took the potion from her and replaced it with the one the both of them would be requiring.  Handing her a dose, he then said with a slight, wry grin, “My apologies in advance for what will likely be a shortness in my temper today.”

 

“Yes, well, I'm sure my disposition won't be as sunny as it usually is, either.  Besides, I remember a time when we bickered a great deal, sometimes over the silliest of things.”

 

The wryness to the curl of his lips morphed to fondness.  “As do I. I cannot say whether a return to that would be preferable to yesterday.”

 

Lily rubbed her tired eyes, letting out a half-laugh.  “I'm fairly confident we're always going to irritate the other to some degree, if for no other reason than that we know it's possible and we take a certain amount of pleasure pushing the other.”

 

One of Severus' brows rose at her declaration.  “ _We?_ ”

 

Lily mock-glared at him.  “Oh, don't give me that, Sev.  You think I never noticed the grin lurking about your lips every time you said something you _knew_ would set me off?”

 

Severus' small grin widened into a lop-sided smile.  “To see you, temper flaring and eyes blazing … was a sight to behold.”

 

Lily at once remembered his admission that he had loved her as far back as their fourth or fifth year in school.  Heat flared in her cheeks as she looked back on those moments with a different perspective. She had never understood why he thought it amusing to say things he knew would make her so angry.  Now, she did. In a moment of retrospection, she wondered if she hadn't done the same … for the same reason. Had she goaded him back then because she had been subconsciously falling for him? She couldn't reject the thought outright.  His proper speech, brilliant mind, and yes, his sharp wit, had always intrigued her as they were so very different from what she was used to, and Severus' riled temper emphasized them. The more she thought about it, the more likely it became.  It would explain why no other boy had caught her interest. Her heart had already chosen without her knowledge until a few years later.

 

“What?” Severus asked, sounding somewhat amused.

 

Lily grinned.  “I just realized something.”

 

“And what is this great epiphany you have had?”

 

“I just realized that I baited you on purpose back then because I enjoyed the reaction I always received when I did it.  The glare you would give me. Your sharp wit, sharper when you were angry but never hurtful – not to me. When anyone else riled you, you held nothing back, but with me, you always chose your words carefully, though they did still sting from time to time.  You held yourself under tight control so much of the time, but when provoked, you lost some of that rigidity and I was treated to the passion I knew resided in you. So, I prodded and poked until I was rewarded.”

 

Not unexpectedly, Severus quirked an eyebrow as he studied her.  “That is … quite the revelation.”

 

“I know.”  Another memory surfaced, causing Lily's cheeks to burn and to duck her head, avoiding his gaze.

 

“Obviously, there is a story that accompanies that spectacular blush.  This, I would like to hear.”

 

“Of course you would,” Lily muttered.  Sighing, she kept her gaze firmly planted on Severus' chest as she divulged one of her teen self's supposedly ridiculous thoughts.  “Back in fifth year, I, well, I had this dream that involved some kissing. _You_ were the one I was with.  The next time I saw you, I could barely look at you.  I remember wondering what the real thing was like.” When the silence stretched out, Lily chanced a glance up at him, only to find him staring down at her with an expression she wasn't sure how to interpret.

 

“I recall that day.  Your behavior was so unlike you, a mystery that I could never solve, so it stayed with me.  If only I had known … I would have gladly obliged.”

 

Lily let out a little huff.  “I know that, now, but back then, I had no clue you felt anything other than friendship towards me.  I was afraid saying anything would ruin that. Besides, it was only one dream, well, maybe two, but still.  I didn't understand what it meant.”

 

Severus' lips twisted into a self-satisfied smirk.  “Two? Do I dare ask what the second entailed?”

 

Lily playfully smacked his stomach, her cheeks still burning.  “Kissing of another sort. A sort we have since engaged in quite often.”  Still smirking, his eyebrow rose again. Holding her head up, she added in her best dignified manner, “Now, if you don't mind, there's a potion I need to take if I'm going to make it through today and then I need to get ready for breakfast.”

 

Severus' smirk faded to an expression of distaste.  “Indeed. I do not believe I could tolerate another of the Headmaster's … chats … over missing the meal.”

 

The two downed their potions, then, went about preparing to leave for breakfast.  On the way up to the Great Hall, Lily recalled her run-in with Quirinus. Glancing around to be certain no one could hear, she told Severus what had happened, careful not to name any names, just to be safe.

 

Severus' jaw clenched.  “You are not becoming paranoid, Lily.  I will speak with him, attempt to convince him he is traveling the wrong path.  Perhaps I will be able to persuade him to leave things as they are.”

 

“Well, if anyone can, it's you.  You at your most imposing is enough to make lesser men wet themselves.”

 

Severus snorted, sarcasm lacing his voice.  “What a visual to have before the morning meal.  Thank you for that.”

 

Lily looked up at him cheekily.  “You're welcome.”

 

“That was not gratitude.”

 

“Oh, I know.”  Lily nonchalantly shrugged her shoulders, breaking out into laughter.  “I would have thought you'd be pleased to know you have that effect on people.  At least, people without a backbone.”

 

“I would be.  I have no patience for someone that weak.  That does not mean, however, that I wish to think on it before eating.”

 

Lily, feeling lighter than she had in the last twelve to eighteen hours, chuckled almost giddily.  “Aw, poor Sev. Lost his appetite. Well, can't have that.” She pulled him into a little alcove and whispered in his ear.  “I'll help you get that appetite back a little later. You might want to make sure you have enough … energy … to start with.”

 

Lily knew she'd been successful in distracting him when he cleared his throat.  “I suddenly find myself ravenous.”

 

It was Lily's turn to smirk, giving him a teasing wink.  “Thought that would do it. Come on. Best get up there before Albus takes us to task like naughty children again.”  She grinned at Severus' revulsion-filled groan.

 

SSLE

 

Harry was half-afraid to enter the Great Hall, not knowing if his parents would be at the staff table, just one of them, if they were okay again, or not speaking to each other like at dinner the previous night.  Loitering a short distance from the doors, heart pounding, he attempted to talk himself into stepping foot inside, or at the very least, sticking his head in to look up at the table. He knew he was being stupid, he chastised himself greatly for his cowardice, but he just couldn't seem to move.

 

“Would you like for me to take a look, Harry?”

 

Harry turned to Neville, feeling guilty for the fact that his friend hadn't eaten yet.  “Thanks, but no. I – I should do it. What happened was my fault. If they're still not talking, well, I'll just have to figure out a way to fix it.”

 

“I don't think it was your fault.  Besides, you couldn't keep that from them.”

 

“I could have for a little while longer.  I mean, it hasn't been that long that they've been back together.  I could have waited until things were more settled.”

 

Neville's gaze narrowed in contemplation.  “Nah, I don't think so. You weren't doing so well.  They would have forced it out of you, I think.”

 

“What's this?  A half-student too afraid to go to breakfast?  Scared who may or may not be present, Snape?”

 

“Shove off, Malfoy.”  Harry was in no mood for the blond git's mouthiness at that moment.

 

The Slytherin sneered again.  “Oh, I'm so terrified. Why don't you make me?”  He laughed, mockingly. “I know why you don't. You're a coward, that's why.  You've made a mess of things with your … ” Here, Malfoy's lip curled disdainfully, “parents … and are afraid to cause more trouble.  So, what's it like to be the reason your parents hate each other?”

 

“I don't know.  You tell me. What _is_ it like, Malfoy?”

 

The other boy's pale face reddened.  “My parents don't hate each other, Snape!”

 

“Hmm.  Sure could have fooled me.  I mean, the pure-blood families I've seen have more than one child.  I figured they had no wish to try again, you know, for a better outcome.”

 

Malfoy's face twisted into a furious scowl and he pulled his wand, pointing it at Harry.  “You take that back, Snape, or I'll make you.”

 

Cavalierly, Harry turned to Neville, who seemed to be staring at him as if he'd completely lost his mind.  Harry wasn't sure he hadn't. “I think I hit a nerve. What do you think?”

 

“Mr. Malfoy, put your wand away.  Ten points from Slytherin.”

 

Harry looked over his shoulder and saw one of the Ravenclaw prefects marching their way.  In a small way, he almost wished the boy hadn't shown up. It would have been interesting to see how far Malfoy had been willing to go considering they were standing in the Entrance Hall, a few feet from the massive Great Hall doors.  Harry grinned to himself. His dad would have claimed that was his mum's Gryffindor influence if he'd heard Harry's thoughts. The sensible side of him – probably his Slytherin side – was glad they'd been interrupted. His dad had warned him to be wary of the Malfoy brat, and Harry had little doubt the Slytherin knew some spells not taught their first year, maybe not even their second.  Or, just maybe, it was all Slytherin thinking. He did, after all, use his words as weapons, getting under Malfoy's skin enough to make the other draw his wand in plain view of anyone walking by – and it being time for breakfast, there were a lot of people likely to be coming and going. Maybe his mum was right. Maybe he _was_ more Slytherin than he thought.

 

Feeling smug, Harry motioned Neville to follow him and he stepped through the doorway, his eyes landing on the staff table.  Letting out a huge sigh of relief, Harry took the few steps that would get him to his little round table. Sitting, his eyes flew to the front of the room again.  His mum and dad were definitely talking, their heads bent slightly towards the other as if discussing something they didn't want anyone overhearing. Though neither smiled, Harry took note of their relaxed postures.  As he sat, watching a minute, he noticed the physical distance between them from last night was gone, and seemingly taking lots of opportunities to brush an arm or hand. From his angle, he had a clear view of their feet and nearly grinned when he noticed his dad's foot just happened to be pressed against the inside of his mum's.

 

“Looks like things are okay.”

 

Turning to his friend and focusing on filling his plate, Harry nodded.  “Yes, it does. Hey, do you mind if I see them for a little while this morning?”

 

Neville dug into his eggs.  “Of course not, Harry. I'll probably be in the library finishing up my homework.  McGonagall's essay topic is so confusing.”

 

Harry nodded sympathetically.  “I agree with you, there. I'm having a hard time with that one, too.  Maybe I can ask Mum or D – ” Harry, realizing where they were, changed his choice of words.  “Maybe, I can ask the professor for help.”

 

SSLE

 

When the door to their rooms opened, Harry stood to face his parents and grinned at seeing their relaxed postures.  So, they hadn't been pretending at breakfast.

 

“Harry!  Well, I guess I can't say I'm surprised to see you here.”

 

“So, everything's okay again, Mum?”

 

His mum joined him by the sofa and ruffled his hair, smiling.  “It is.”

 

“Good.  I was afraid I'd messed things up too badly.”

 

“What?” came his mum's confused reply.  

 

Harry noted his dad had even paused in undoing the myriad buttons of his jacket to look over at him sharply, a furrow between his brows.  Shrugging, he tried for a lighthearted tone but didn't think he was entirely successful.

 

“Well, if I hadn't come down here yesterday and shown the mark to you, nothing would have happened.”

 

His mum and dad exchanged a look Harry couldn't interpret before she turned to him, pulling him onto the sofa and sitting herself.  “Harry, listen to me. What happened yesterday was not your fault. You did exactly as you were supposed to do by coming to us, and really, you should have come sooner.”

 

“But you wouldn't have argued if I hadn't – ”

 

“Harry, until yesterday you had only seen one side of my …”  Severus removed his jacket, hung it up, then sat in his usual armchair, looking as if he if was searching for the right words.  His chin lifted a bit. “At times, my temper can and does get the best of me, an unfortunate legacy from my father, and, like him, I tend to be cruel.  What was said between your mother and I was said out of desperation and fear. Neither of us meant those things, a conclusion I came to after having had time to think.”

 

“But, at dinner – ”

 

Harry's mum took his hand, giving it a gentle squeeze before releasing it.  “It was an awkward meal because neither of us knew exactly how to approach the other.  We did try, but Hogwarts is so large, we ended up missing each other. Anyway, it's done.  It's over. There's nothing for you to worry about.”

 

“Harry, your mother and I are rather strong-willed – ”

 

“You more than me.”  

 

Harry could hear the humor in his mum's voice, could see the way she fought not to grin, so he turned back to his dad to catch his reaction.  His dad's eyes narrowed slightly, but one corner of his mouth quirked upward the tiniest bit, telling Harry his dad wasn't angry. Exasperated a little, perhaps, but not angry, and it made Harry feel happy enough to want to snort in amusement.  He didn't dare to, however.

 

“That is your delusion and if you choose to believe it, I shall not disavow you of that notion  … at this time.” To Harry, he continued with what he'd been about to say. “Harry, this will likely not be the last argument your mother and I have.  I can promise you that I will be certain to choose my words more carefully in the future.”

 

“But why?  You haven't argued once since we've been here.”

 

Another unreadable look passed between his parents, but his mum was the one to answer.  “Sometimes, with something new, you have to feel your way along, and you don't want to do or say anything that will mess things up.  That's how it's been for your father and me.”

 

At first, Harry didn't get it.  What was so new? They'd been together before, so why should things be new again?  The more he thought about it, though, the more sense it made. A lot of time had passed since then and, in his dad's case, things were done that had a huge impact on the person they were.  In a way, it was like himself and Neville. He had met the boy on the train and had become friends with him, but then, Neville had been Sorted into Gryffindor and he, himself, had been given Gryffindor _and Slytherin_.  Rival Houses.  He hadn't been sure if Neville would be friends with him anymore after that, and once Neville proved to be a good friend, Harry had been a little afraid of doing something at first that might push him away.  Now, he was certain Neville would always be his friend and Harry had become more comfortable with him.

 

Glancing between his parents, he said some of those thoughts out loud.  “I think I get it. You weren't certain how the other person was anymore, so that's why you didn't argue.  But then, you became used to each other and was more comfortable. Right?”

 

His dad's arched brow told Harry he had impressed him.  His words, delivered with a hint of humor, just confirmed Harry's inference.  “You should have been placed into Ravenclaw with deductions such as those.”

 

Grinning, Harry shook his head.  “Nah. I'll tell you the same thing I told Mum.  I like being in both Gryffindor and Slytherin. It can be fun watching people react because they often don't know what to say or do, especially if I say something or do something opposite of what is expected of the particular House.”

 

That earned him an amused smirk from his dad.  “How very Slytherin of you, Harry.”

 

Lily grinned, lightly mussing Harry's shaggy hair.  “I told you there was more Slytherin in you than you thought.”

 

Harry ducked away, giving her a sour look as he attempted to straighten his hair.  “I'm beginning to believe it. Especially after Malfoy -” Harry snapped his mouth shut, but it was too late.  

 

“ _What_ about Mr. Malfoy?”

 

Harry practically gulped at the quiet steel in his dad's voice, the very deliberate way it had been uttered, and the dangerous look in his dark eyes as they narrowed.   If it had just been his mum, he would have tried to play it off like it had been nothing. He didn't _dare_ do that with his dad.

 

“Well …”

 

“Harry James Snape!  You had better not have gotten into a fight, young man, or so help me … what?  What do you find so amusing?”

 

He had tried really hard not to grin.  Truly, he had. After all, his mum in a temper was not one to trifle with, but he'd been unable to help himself.   Hearing his full name being used, and knowing it was official, it just made him happy for some reason. He couldn't explain why.   For that reason, he pressed his lips together, hoping that was enough to appease his mum.

 

“Not a physical fight, no.”  Harry noted his mum didn't appear any happier.

 

“A verbal one, then.  That doesn't make it much better.”

 

“But, Mum, didn’t you always say that using my words over my wand was much more intelligent?  That’s exactly what I did. I couldn’t let him get away with saying those things.”

 

“Slytherin tactics, Lily?”

 

“Not just Slytherin.  Besides, it’s common sense.  Anyway, that’s not the point.  Harry, you know better than to pay any mind to the things people may say.”

 

“What, precisely, did Mr. Malfoy say?”

 

Harry sat quietly as his mum turned with a huff towards his dad.  “Really, Sev? Does it matter? Our son is getting into confrontations with other students, no matter who the other students may be.”

 

“Provocation does, indeed, matter, Lily.  I cannot take appropriate action if I do not understand the circumstances.”

 

“You can’t seriously be thinking of punishing the Malfoy boy.  You know how that would look, especially to Malfoy. There can’t be even the _hint_ of favoritism, and you rushing off to punish Malfoy for speaking with Harry does exactly that.  It’ll only make things worse for Harry.”

 

“I am rushing nowhere, as you can very well see.  At the beginning of this year, I set some House rules that I expect to be followed.  Mr. Malfoy chose to violate those guidelines once again. His behavior warrants a conversation, if not any punishment.  I would prefer to be informed of what was said so I may speak appropriately. To allow those actions to go unpunished would make me no better than another Head of House who refused to punish her students for bullying.”

 

Harry wilted into the sofa, wishing he could disappear,  anxiety at hearing them arguing again. Yes, he had been told by both of them that they were likely to do so, but Harry hadn't expected it to happen again so quickly.  A lump formed in his throat. He should have just kept his mouth shut. Malfoy's taunts were nothing, really. Certainly, nothing he hadn't heard before. Okay, maybe the jab at being the cause of his parents’ hating each other had hurt and angered him, but hadn't the boy been right to a certain extent?

 

“Harry, we're not angry.  We're merely discussing things.  Fatigue has shortened our tempers a bit.”

 

Now that Harry truly looked at his mum, he could see she looked tired, with redness under her eyes and her face was more pale than usual.  His dad, from what he could see past his hair, appeared worse. The shadows under his eyes a darker red, the skin puffy. He wore an expression that Harry read as guilt, though he had no idea why his dad would feel that way.  Instinct told him it had nothing to do with their recent disagreement. Harry's gaze flicked back to his mum and nodded his acceptance of her explanation. 

 

“What _did_ Mr. Malfoy say to you?”

 

Harry turned back to his dad.  Though the man's face was still half-hidden, his tone of voice demanded a response.  Not because it was harsh, cold, steely, but because it was so softly spoken, resigned.  Despondent, almost. The man he called Dad had yet to meet his gaze since the conversation refocused on him.

 

“He said a few things I'm used to hearing, but he did say something that bothered me.   He asked me how it felt to be the reason my parents hated each other.”

 

The clenching of his dad's hands and subsequent finger-by-finger release was the only indication Harry had of the man's anger.  When he spoke, it was with the same tone he used previously. 

 

“Nothing could be further from the truth.”

 

“I know that now.  Besides, I asked him a question of my own.   I shrugged and said _I don't know.  How does it?_ I told him most pure-blood families I knew had more than one kid, so I just thought his parents didn't like each other enough to try for more, making him more aware of the answer to his question than me.”

 

“Harry!” 

 

Though his mum seemed almost scandalized,  Harry heard a snort of laughter come from the armchair.  Glancing over, he caught his dad's gaze, taking note of the humor he could see there, as well as the slight up-turn of the man's mouth.  Seeing it, Harry had to fight back a grin, so he shrugged unapologetically instead.  

 

“It's true, Mum.  That's when Malfoy pointed his wand at me but a Ravenclaw Prefect caught him and took points from Slytherin.”  Harry scrunched up his face in apology. “Sorry, Dad.”

 

“It was warranted.  I shall have a chat with the Ravenclaw Prefect before reminding Mr. Malfoy of proper Slytherin behavior.”

 

“You might want to talk with Montague and Flint, too.”  Harry ignored the warning look his mum threw his way, keeping his gaze firmly fixed on his dad. 

 

“Harry, that's been handled.”

 

As Harry had known he would, his dad's gaze sharpened as it bounced between him and his mum.  “What is this with Montague and Flint?” The steel returned to his voice.

 

“They said some pretty nasty things about Mum yesterday.”

 

“It was nothing to be concerned with, Sev.  As I said, it’s been handled. If you’ll take a look at the Slytherin hourglass in the Great Hall, you’ll see that you’ve lost quite a few points.”

 

“If members of my House are disregarding _my_ rules, I need to be made aware of it.  I will not have my Slytherins believing those edicts are simply for show.  Tell me what was said so that I may know if they attempt to lie.”

 

“I don’t need you fighting my battles, Severus.  Punishment was given. Let it go at that. If it’s any consolation, they had the option to either take the points loss or face you.  Needless to say, they chose _not_ to face you considering the mood you were in.”

 

Harry, knowing his mum would never divulge just what those two had said, decided to do it for her.  “They used the M word and said something about being used for entertainment but not for breeding.”

 

The fierce scowl that followed his words sent shivers down Harry’s spine, extremely glad that expression wasn’t for him.  He almost - _almost_ \- felt sorry for the two.  Whatever his dad did to them, Harry knew they deserved every bit of it.  Seeing another disagreement coming, he decided to forego asking them about Transfiguration.  He and Neville would figure it out. While he was glad to know that these moments weren’t serious, Harry still had no desire to listen to them, the big argument simply too fresh in his mind.

 

“Neville and I still have Transfiguration homework to finish.  I think we’ll be skipping Potions practice this afternoon.” Harry turned toward the door, but turned back to say, “Oh, and I think I’ll be in Slytherin this week.”

 

“Very well, Harry.  I shall expect to see you in the common room by curfew.  Perhaps next week, a double practice session can be arranged if Mr. Longbottom feels it is needed.”

 

“I’ll let him know.”  

 

Harry exited his dad’s quarters to find Neville.  As he headed up the stairs, he wondered why they had been so tired, but what truly had him thinking was the look of guilt he had glimpsed on his dad’s face.  He knew that look because he, himself, had worn it a few times. His dad’s voice had been so … flat. Not flat like in class when his dad was being all authoritative, but flat as in unemotional.  Like he’d had every emotion wrung out of him. Harry knew how that felt, too. When his mum had announced that they were leaving Spain for good, with absolutely no warning and no asking how he had felt about it, he had argued with her over it.  It hadn’t been that he didn’t want to meet his dad, but not to even be consulted when it was his life they were uprooting, too, had made him so angry. Afterward, he had felt that worn-out feeling. Maybe it was the same thing for his dad. Harry grinned as he recalled the snort of amusement and the humor in his dad’s eyes after relaying what he said about Malfoy.  The grin grew a bit wider at the thought of the coming retribution his dad would likely bring upon the three Slytherins for disobeying those rules. Harry sort of hoped he was in the common room when it came.

 

Putting it out of his mind for the moment so he could focus on Transfiguration, Harry went in search of Neville.

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  



	9. Saved

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Since I finally finished chapter 10, I thought I'd post chapter 9. Okay, a few notes. Sev's lovely words to Lily after disclosing some of his deeds during the war come from Snow Patrol's song Signal Fire (Just a line or two). Also, his thoughts upon waking the following morning were partially inspired by Mumford & Sons' song I Gave You All (again, just a line or so). The idea of Sev having the heart, soul, and voice of a poet is not an original idea, unfortunately. It comes from one of my favorite Severitus stories, A New Place to Stay. I just thought it so appropriate that I borrowed it.

**_… Damned by the darkness that lives inside me … Saved by her love._ **

**_\-- Linnea Sinclair, Gabriel’s Ghost_ **

 

For the second night in a row, Lily was awakened suddenly to find Severus gasping for breath.  When she tried to speak to him about it, he refused to say anything beyond that it was a simple nightmare and for her to go back to sleep.  How he thought she could possibly go back to sleep while he remained awake and suffering, she had no clue. So, despite his assurance of being fine, she sat up with him, lending him silent support and comfort, all the while hoping he would open up to her as he did the night before.  The only reason she could think that would keep him tight-lipped was that these dreams didn’t involve herself or Harry, that they involved things from the past.

 

This scene played itself out every night for a week, and Lily was desperate for some way to help.  Since Wednesday, Severus had taken to staying awake by brewing potions until the wee hours of the morning, then, taking an Invigorating Draught.  Why he wouldn't simply take a Dreamless Sleep potion was beyond her comprehension. Pride, most likely. She worried over what was going on in that stubborn head of his, feared he felt he deserved to relive those horrific moments of his past as some warped way of atoning for his sins.  She thought she had made some headway after that discussion about his Dark Mark when they had spent the day together, and perhaps she had since he had been less … uptight … about keeping his forearm covered when in their quarters. Obviously, that was not enough.

 

Each day, Sev grew more surly, returning to what Lily assumed was his practices and attitude before she and Harry had returned, barely speaking to her.  When he did, it was in clipped, one-word utterances. It hurt that he refused to confide in her even as she knew it wasn’t in his nature to talk of such things.  That was why she had been so completely surprised that first night when he had done so. As the week wore on, Lily could see the impact his sleepless nights were having on Harry, too, could see the anxiety in his gaze as he watched Sev distance himself, no doubt worried over this latest development and blaming himself.  Lily didn’t think any amount of talking to Harry would convince him that this wasn’t his fault, though she did try. No, she had to go directly to the source. Severus, himself.  

 

At three o’clock on Friday morning, Lily decided enough was enough.  She’d lock the two of them in the loo if that was what it took to get Severus to talk, to truly talk.  Wrapping up in her dressing gown, she stepped across the corridor to the closed door of the loo after hearing the tell-tale flush that told her the nightmare had been another bloodcurdling vision.  Behind the door, she heard nothing, so she gave a light rap to announce her presence.

 

“Sev, I’m coming in.”  Turning the knob, she found it locked and sighed.  “Please don’t shut me out. I want to help.”

 

“You cannot,” came Severus’ weary reply.

 

“I beg to differ.”  

 

Lily steeled herself for the explosion that was likely to come, but didn’t allow it to stop her from proceeding with her plan.  With a wave of her wand, she gained access to Severus’ current hiding place. Her heart went out to the dejected man who sat on the floor, leaning against the shower door, elbows resting on bent knees, his head in his hands.  Silently, she crossed the small space and joined him on the floor.

 

“Privacy is too much to ask for now, is it?”

 

Lily ignored his attempt to drive her away.  There had been nothing in his tone but exhaustion.  “Talk to me, love. I’m not leaving you alone this time.  Neither of us are leaving this room until you tell me everything.”

 

She anxiously watched as he sighed heavily, thumb and forefinger digging into his eyes.  “I will not. Some things you need not hear.”

 

Lily snorted derisively.  “Spare me the protective act.  I’m not some innocent who is too delicate to understand what war actually means.  I know it means doing things we’d rather not do.”

 

Severus’ haunted eyes glared at her.  “You know nothing of the things I have done.”  He stood to leave, but a wave of her wand had the door slamming, sealing it shut.  He whirled back to her, snarling, “You would lock me inside? Create  _ another _ prison from which I cannot escape?”

 

That jab had Lily wincing a bit with guilt, but she stood her ground.  He  _ had  _ to talk.  Holding it all in was obviously not doing him any good.  “I just want you to talk to me. I’ve tried doing things your way this past week, but it’s not helping.  In fact, it’s hurting. It’s hurting you, me, the students. Harry. Everyone is suffering.”

 

Lily knew she would get her way when he crossed his arms over his chest, a vicious smirk twisting his lips.  “You wish to know? Very well. I played spectator to Fenrir Grayback’s disemboweling of a nine-year-old Muggle girl while her parents watched.  I created a potion for the Dark Lord that almost instantly liquified one’s insides and tested it on some innocent Muggle man with his family present.  At His demand, I brewed another potion that locked a person inside their mind, living out their deepest fears and forced it down the throat of an innocent Muggle woman.  Another potion he insisted upon was one that caused a person to bleed on the inside, to the point of asphyxiating on their own blood. I did nothing while another family was tortured, a girl barely older than Harry, fourteen at the most, was raped by several of my associates.”

 

Severus turned his back to her, continuing his recitation of what it meant to be a spy in Voldemort’s Inner Circle, the vicious edge leaching from his voice, becoming bleaker as he spoke.  “I stood aside and allowed children to fight for their lives as entertainment for His followers. Those who won were fed and healed. Those who lost were toyed with before they were killed.” He paused and Lily thought he’d finished speaking, but he continued.  “That is merely a sampling of the things that occurred, Lily.”

 

Lily’s heart felt as if it had broken as she had listened, watching Severus’ posture slide from defiance, straight-backed, uplifted chin and piercing gaze to dejection, shoulders slumped, head bowed.  As hard as it had been to hear it, she knew it had been even harder for him to speak of those acts, but she still believed he had needed to. Rising to her feet, she quietly stepped up behind him, encircled his waist, pulling him back against her, and laid her head between his shoulder blades.  While Severus tensed upon her initial contact, he didn’t pull away from her. Lily took that as a good sign.

 

For a long moment, they remained that way.  Lily wanted to say how sorry she was he had witnessed such horrors but knew that was the wrong thing to say.  Severus would either take it as pity or as her attempt to acquit him of the responsibility he bore for his own actions.  She would do neither, for the simple fact of the matter was that she didn’t pity him. Sympathized, yes, but not pitied. There was no erasing the truth that he did, in fact, bear responsibility for the choices he made.  However, she did not hold him responsible for the heinous, bloodthirsty, brutality of others, including Voldemort. Severus could have refused to brew those potions, could have refused to observe the cruelty done to the captives, but if he had, he would not be there now, drawing breath.  He wouldn’t be in her arms. He would never have known how much she loved him, would never have known he was the father of a wonderful, intelligent, sly, brave boy who reminded her so much of his father.

 

Inhaling deeply, Lily skimmed her hands up to his crossed arms, the pain in her chest lightening when he loosened them enough to allow her hands underneath as they traveled upward, fingers splaying across his chest, one palm over his wildly beating heart.  Licking her dry lips, she tasted the salt from her tears. Swallowing against another onslaught of them, she pressed a kiss to Severus’ back, lingering there as she struggled to find the words to convey what she felt, hoping her words would allow the healing process to begin.

 

“I can’t find it in myself to be sorry that you did as you were told, that you didn’t interfere with anything they did because I know, if you had, you would not be standing here with me now.  Does that make me a terrible person?”

 

Severus spun in her arms so quickly he took her by surprise.  Cupping her face in gentle hands, he lowered his forehead to hers, his voice barely a whisper.  “You are one of the few good things I have ever had. Many times, I felt the weight of … everything …  pressing on me … pushing me further into the darkened pit of misery, but then … I would think of you. The mere thought of you pulled me back from the edge, giving me the determination to keep going, despite believing I had lost you forever.  You were … still are … my signal fire … my light in the darkness … guiding me toward safety.”

 

Lily could no more have stopped the tears that poured from her eyes than she could have stopped loving Severus.  “I’ll always be here, Sev. Harry and I will  _ always  _ be here.  You can count on that.  Just don’t shut us out.”

 

“I make no guarantees, but I shall endeavor to be less … uncommunicative.”

 

“That’s all I ask.”  Angling her chin, Lily captured Severus’ lips in the gentlest kiss they’d ever shared.  “Take a dose of the Dreamless Sleep potion. No arguments. I’ll contact Poppy. She can make our excuses to Albus as far as breakfast is concerned and actually make it sound like it’s on her orders.  She can also talk to Harry so that he isn’t concerned.”  

 

Taking him by the hand, Lily waved her wand to unlock the door.  “Come on. Both of us could use a solid block of sleep.”

 

Exiting the loo, she led Severus across the corridor to their room, Summoned the potion and measured out a dose into a Conjured cup.  She waited, cup outstretched, for him to argue with her over it, but was pleasantly surprised when he silently took it from her and downed the contents.  Sitting next to him on their bed, Lily skimmed her fingers through his hair as the potion took hold of him. Her thumb slipping lightly over his cheekbone and down to his jaw, she had to blink furiously against another torrent of tears.  The horrors Sev had lived through! How was it possible he had survived with any bit of sanity intact?

 

She waited a solid five minutes before heading into the sitting room to the fireplace, threw in some Floo Powder.  “Poppy! Poppy, I need to speak with you!”

 

Unsurprisingly, a couple of minutes passed before the tired-yet-amazingly-awake form of the matron knelt beside her hearth.  “Lily? Is something wrong? Is it Harry?”

 

“I’m so sorry to wake you.  No, it’s Sev. He’s finally opened up a fraction and revealed some of what he’s endured during the war.  Oh, Poppy, it was so awful, just the bit I’ve heard! How is it that he’s still sane after all of that?”

 

“Because he’s every bit as strong-willed as you have lamented to me.  It’s good that he’s finally sharing. I can only assume what has occurred with Harry has brought it all back in the form of terrifying nightmares.  Am I right?”

 

“You are.  All week it’s been terror after terror, but he wouldn’t talk to me.  After another round tonight, I locked the two of us in the loo and forced him to tell me a little.  He took a Dreamless Sleep potion. That’s what I wanted to speak with you about.”

 

Poppy held up a hand to stop her.  “Say no more. You both could use a good amount of rest.  If Albus has anything to say about the two of you missing breakfast, I’ll tell him it was on my orders.”

 

Lily let out a relieved sigh.  “Thank you. Let Harry know everything’s alright, will you?  I know he’s been worried. To be honest, I’m surprised he hasn’t come to see me to find out what’s been going on.”  After a second, she changed her statement. “Then again, after the big argument Sev and I had, maybe I shouldn’t be that surprised.  Anyway, will you talk to him?”

 

“Of course, I will.  Now, you go get some sleep.  We’ll see you at lunch … maybe.”

 

Suppressing a yawn, Lily smiled wearily.  “Thank you.”

 

Pulling out of her fireplace, Lily wobbled as she stood and had to grab at the mantle to steady herself.  The distance to the bedroom could have been equal to the distance to the Gryffindor common room for all the energy she had.  Running a hand over her face, she forced herself to bypass the inviting comfort of the sofa and continued on to the bedroom. Severus hadn’t moved a muscle, still lying on his side as she had left him.  Climbing into bed, Lily pulled his arm over her and cuddled against his chest, really relaxing for the first time in seven days. Sleep quickly took her under.

 

SSLE

 

Severus inhaled deeply and instantly detected raspberry.  For a few moments, his thoughts were sluggish, his eyes felt swollen.  Cracking them open, he saw red. Well, dark auburn. Deep, rhythmic breaths fanned across his lips and cheek.  Moving to put a little space between himself and Lily, Severus winced at the sudden screaming in his muscles. He must have fallen asleep and not moved … at all.  The instant the thought formed, memories of being locked in the lavatory with Lily, revealing to her the stuff of his nightmares, returned with a vengeance. Loathing himself for tainting his beloved with the hell in which he had lived, he clenched his teeth.  If he’d been able, he’d have escaped from Lily’s embrace, not feeling the least bit deserving of having her lying next to him.

 

In the past, Severus had enjoyed watching Lily sleep, still unable to believe his good fortune.  This time, however, he took no pleasure in it, for all he could see were the shadows under her eyes, knowing he had put them there.  He recalled the stabbing in his heart as her hot tears the previous night fell onto his forearms. A couple had trickled over his Dark Mark, and he could remember thinking the juxtaposition of those tears, shed out of sympathy and love, over his tattoo made the sinister image seem that much more vulgar. Indeed, he could have sworn he felt it tingle, mocking Lily’s pain.  He’d never meant to hurt her, and lately, it seemed all he could do. Yet, she remained. Severus couldn’t stop the hoarse exhalation of breath that could have possibly passed for a chuckle. And she called  _ him  _ obstinate.  He loved her pertinacity.  If she’d been otherwise, they never would have connected in the same manner.

 

Gently, Severus pressed a kiss to Lily’s head, intending to slide out of her arms afterward, but her grip on him tightened as her eyes fluttered.

 

“Good morning.”

 

Damn, he’d never tire of gazing into those gorgeous green eyes.  “Good morning, Lily.”

 

“Well, I assume it’s morning.”  Lily turned towards the bedside table, drawing Severus’ gaze to the clock.  “Yes, it’s still morning, but not for much longer. Before you start to panic, I contacted Poppy.  I’m sure she handled Albus. We’ll just need to make an appearance at lunch and dinner.”

 

Rolling to his back, Severus ran a hand over his face, rubbing at his eyes.  He felt as if he’d been sleeping for a week … and wanted to continue. Not waking from the nasty things that had been visiting him in his dreams was refreshing and, at the moment, he couldn’t recall why he’d not taken a dose of the Dreamless Sleep potion before now.  Oh, yes, he could. It would have been too easy to depend on it for quality sleep. He would have been taking doses every night, which would have lessened the potion’s effectiveness over time.

 

“What are you thinking?”

 

“Nothing, really.”

 

“Sev, you made me a promise last night.”

 

Turning to face her and cupping the back of her head, Severus pulled Lily down for a good morning kiss.  “I recall the vow I made to you, Lils, and I shall strive to follow through with it. In this instance, the only thoughts I had was how it felt to awaken feeling as if I had actually slept.”

 

Lily rewarded his expression of his thoughts with a beaming smile.  “The wonderful magic of that particular potion.”

 

“Indeed.  However, it cannot be taken often.  To do so would result in developing a tolerance for it, rendering the potion ineffective.  You know this.”

 

“I do, but if it’s absolutely needed, then it should be taken.”  Lily’s hand raised so her thumb could trace his cheekbone as her fingers slid into his hair.  “Just don’t make me force you to take it again. I didn’t want to do that to you. I just didn’t know what else to do.  I hated seeing you suffer and not being allowed to help.”

 

Severus gathered Lily close, burying his nose in her hair.  “I am … grateful … that you had the courage to do so. The memories, they were not remaining buried, even with Occlumency.  Though I wish you remained blissfully ignorant of the odious aspect of the war, I cannot deny the burden of carrying them has lessened.”

 

The expression she wore as she gazed down at him was a highly familiar one to Severus; he’d worn that very same expression on many occasions in the past when proven correct.  “So, I was right to get you to talk it out.”

 

Knowing she wanted to hear the actual words, Severus mentally rolled his eyes and sighed heavily, as if he was reluctant to do so.  In reality, he didn’t mind that much. This was a game they had played many times when they were younger. “Indeed, you were correct.”

 

Leaning down, Lily kissed his nose, then his lips.  “Remember that, and we won’t have any problems.” Chuckling playfully, she sat up.  “Come on. We have an hour to ready ourselves for lunch, and I, for one, am starving.  I wouldn’t be surprised if Harry pops in to see us. I know he was getting worried. I swear, sometimes, he acts more like the parent than the child.  He’s always been that way.”

 

A little stab of guilt hit Severus upon hearing of Harry’s increasing distress.  Perhaps, he should take his son aside, spend some time with him, and attempt to explain in vague terms the past week’s occurrences.  The latter part of Lily’s statements penetrated his thoughts and he smirked as he looked up at her with an eyebrow raised.

 

“In case it has escaped your notice, Lils, we Snapes tend to be protective of the ones we love.  Discounting my father.”

 

Lily let out a snort.  “Oh, believe me. I have most definitely noticed.  Exasperating is what it is. Exasperating … but touching, nonetheless.  By the way, what you said to me last night about being your light in the darkness?  That was very poetic. Mum always thought you had the heart, soul, and voice of a poet.  You should definitely let that side of you out to play more often.”

 

Severus grinned to himself as Lily stood, collected clothes, and headed for the lavatory.  Rolling onto his back, arms outstretched, Severus stared at the ceiling. Tired though he was, he didn’t have the luxury of whiling away the day in bed, despite it being Saturday.  He had patrols to do, essays to mark. Most importantly, he had a son who desperately needed some reassurance that all was well. Collecting his own change of clothes, he recalled the words to which Lily had referred in her parting shot … and snorted.  He was no poet; therefore, he had no poetic side. He had merely spoken the truth as he saw it. If she thought they had a certain … romantic … flair, well, that was her own flight of fancy. If ever there was one thing Severus Snape had not been accused of, it was being  _ romantic _ .  He had not a single romantic bone in his body, and he liked it that way.

 

While he waited for Lily to finish, Severus scribbled out a message to Harry, used his wand to dry the ink, then folded the parchment, stuffing it into the pocket of his frock coat.  By that time, Lily had finished, so he ducked into the lavatory.

 

SSLE

 

Harry's fork paused on its way to his mouth when a folded parchment was placed next to his plate by an ingredient-stained hand.  He knew that hand, as well as the black sleeve that accompanied it. Was this it? Was this the message he'd been expecting all week? The one that said things weren't working between his parents and that they decided to split up?  The hand had yet to move, so, with much dread, he looked into the face of his father. The scowl he saw there disappeared rather quickly, but Harry caught it. Yeah, it was bad. His dad nodded once to him and to Neville before continuing on to the staff table and sitting next to Harry's mum.

 

Carefully setting down his fork - his appetite gone - Harry slid the parchment closer.  His lunch feeling like a stone in his stomach, he unfolded the note.

 

_ Harry,  _

 

_ I must apologize for my behavior this week.  Suffice it to say I was not at my best. Your mother has brought to my attention that you, especially, have been adversely affected by my actions and words.  Allow me to reassure you that any concerns you may have regarding your mother and myself are unfounded. If you will meet with me after lunch at your mother's classroom, I will make an attempt to explain. _

 

_ Dad _

 

“Bad news?”

 

“Actually, no.  He wants to talk to me after lunch.  To explain what's been going on.”

 

“Oh.  Well, that's good.”

 

Refolding the parchment,  Harry stuffed it into his pocket, feeling less anxious than he had all week.  Picking up his fork, he made a decent dent into the food on his plate before deciding not to wait any longer.  Glancing up at the staff table, Harry noticed his parents chatting, his dad appearing to have already finished eating.  His mum nodded in his direction with a sideways tilt to her head, obviously redirecting his dad’s attention. Meeting the man’s gaze, Harry received a brief nod.  Bidding Neville goodbye, Harry rose and left the Great Hall.

 

Harry climbed the marble staircase and, upon reaching the Muggle Studies room, paced outside the door as he waited for his dad to come.  Despite Madam Pomfrey reassuring him that morning that everything was fine, he had doubted her honesty. Didn’t every adult say that to a kid, even if it wasn’t true?  Okay, perhaps his mum hadn’t, but she was an exception. At least, that’s what he understood. Soft footfalls coming from down the corridor had him turning in that direction.   How in Merlin's name did his dad manage to walk so softly in boots against stone? If he wasn't so nervous, he would have snickered at the vision the man made, the Wizarding world's version of Darth Vader, striding so purposefully, his cloak billowing behind him.  For a moment, Harry wondered if his dad would appreciate the comparison.

 

To Harry's surprise,  his dad cast some sort of charm around them, then motioned for Harry to follow as he continued briskly down the corridor.  Shaking off his puzzlement, Harry rushed to keep up. There were many questions he wanted to ask but figured he shouldn't push.  He knew the man didn't speak freely when it came to feelings and stuff like that, so he waited. They had reached the end of the corridor and was leisurely descending a staircase when his dad finally spoke.

 

“You have been concerned regarding the state of things between your mother and I, have you not?”

 

“A little.  Madam Pomfrey said everything would be fine, but isn't that the usual thing someone says to keep someone else from worrying?”

 

“Normally so.  However, in this case, it is the truth.”  The man stopped halfway down the staircase, his expression unreadable.  “Harry, I know your mother informed you of my past. Every night this week, I have re-lived some of the more … insidious … acts performed by me or in my presence while I … did nothing to stop them.”

 

Nightmares, in other words.  While he didn't know the particulars, Harry could imagine whatever his dad had dealt with was unspeakably horrible.  He understood what it was like to wake up in a cold sweat, barely able to catch your breath; for the last week, he had been doing just that.  In his nightmare, he heard screaming and laughter made all the scarier by its hissing quality. Not to mention the eerie green light. Harry just managed to suppress a shudder and was thankful for the long sleeves of his shirt hiding the sudden appearance of gooseflesh on his arms.

 

“Do you think less of me, Harry, for not taking action against them?”

 

Incredulous that he had been asked that, Harry's wide eyes flew up to meet his dad’s questioning gaze.  “No, of course not!” Then, he forgot just where they were. “Dad, they would have killed you if you had tried!”  The raising of his dad's eyebrow gave Harry pause, and he realized what he'd said. “Sorry.”

 

“Any other time, I would have reprimanded you for your slip.  However, it is not as your professor that I have come to you. In addition, no one is privy to our discussion.  Therefore, your error shall be overlooked.”

 

“Is that what that spell does?  Keeps others from overhearing? Brilliant!”

 

Though the man wore a stern expression, Harry was nearly positive he had seen the corner of his dad's lips twitch a little, as if fighting a grin.  “So it is. I do not want to hear of you using it.”

 

Harry rolled his eyes as they reached the landing.  “How could I? You never said the incantation.”

 

“And if I had?”

 

Harry let out a huff of exasperation, intoning, “I wouldn't use it.”  

 

Truly, he wasn't all that annoyed.  Talking with his dad like this hadn't happened often, especially since school had begun.  It felt rather nice to be walking the corridors of the school, sharing a certain camaraderie with the man he called his dad.  He found it comical the way some of the students skittered away upon spotting them, not that he blamed those who did. Darth Vader had strolled around terrorizing people at the drop of a hat, punishing them for the least little thing - and he had a cloak that floated menacingly behind him.  This past week, his dad had been exactly like that. Harry heard a huge sigh when it happened a fifth time.

 

With a mischievous look in his eyes, Harry asked, “How familiar are you with Muggle films from when you and Mum were in your seventh year?”  He laughed outright at the look his dad sent his way at the sudden change in topics.

 

“Somewhat.  Why do you ask?”

 

Harry had to bite his lip to keep from laughing again.  “Well, there was this movie called Star Wars.”

 

“I am familiar with it.  During the Christmas holidays, your mother took me to see it.  It was the only time we broke from our supposed argument.”

 

“Okay, then, you’re also familiar with the character Darth Vader.”

 

“Perhaps.”  The two paused in the middle of the corridor.  “I fail to see the relevance - ”

 

Harry arched his eyebrow, knowing his dad would figure it out if given a moment.  The man was bloody brilliant and wickedly sly. Sure enough, a few seconds passed before one of the man’s eyebrows jumped in response to Harry’s.  Though he couldn’t be certain, Harry didn’t think his dad found the comparison offensive. Indeed, his thinking was proven correct.

 

“Darth Vader, now, is it?  An evil character who still had enough Light inside him to eventually turn from the Dark side in order to save his son.  That is … tolerable. There are worse monikers I have been given.”

 

Harry’s other eyebrow joined its partner.  “You’ve seen all three of them? But that was during the war, after you and mum, well, you know.  At least, the second one was. How did you explain seeing a Muggle film?”

 

“No explanations were necessary as no one discovered the truth.  However, if it had been necessary, the mention of a viciously evil villain I wished to emulate would have sufficed.”

 

Harry wondered what the real reason was for his dad to have continued seeing the films.  Did he dare ask? He was part Gryffindor, so he  _ should  _ have the courage, but that trait seemed to have vanished at the moment.  Besides, did it really matter?  _ Some  _ things should remain private, shouldn’t they?  As much as he’d like to know, to understand his dad even more, Harry decided that the  _ why  _ didn’t matter.  Or, at least,  _ he _ didn’t have to know it.  

 

Father and son wandered in silence a few minutes before Severus broke it.  “Your nightmare. What does it contain?”

 

Harry’s head whipped around so fast he felt a little popping sensation in his neck.  “How did you know about that? I haven’t told anyone.”

 

“Observe.  Then, speak.  It is an invaluable practice.”

 

Harry grimaced.  He obviously had not been as successful at hiding his shudder or his earlier thoughts as well as he had believed.  Anxiously, he met his father’s gaze with a question. “What kind of spell has green light?”

 

Seeing his dad’s complexion go from pale to stark white alarmed Harry to the point of averting his gaze.  That had  _ not  _ been the reaction he had expected.  The horrified expression as the man looked down at him had Harry wishing he hadn’t said anything about it.  Whatever it was, it was something bad, and now, his dad knew Harry was dreaming of bad things. Was the man worried he would do bad things one day?  Harry had heard on the telly that evil people often visualized the things they wanted to do before doing them. Was that what was happening? Was he turning bad?  No, he couldn’t be, could he? He didn’t think so, but did the madmen ever think they were bad, either? Voldemort certainly didn’t. No, he had to make his dad see that his son wasn’t becoming evil.  

 

A firm, but gentle pressure at the nape of his neck guided Harry into a nearby classroom and into a chair.  Mutely, he watched his father throw up spells around the room, though he didn’t know why if their conversation was already being hidden by others.  Harry stared at the floor when his dad finished, Levitated the professor’s chair into place in front of him, and sat, leaning forward, yet holding himself stiffly.

 

“Harry, I fear I know what your nightmare entails by the question you posed, though I am having difficulty believing you capable of remembering that event.  Tell me every detail you recall. Leave nothing out.”

 

Taken a bit aback at the urgent command in his dad’s voice, Harry recited what he saw and heard in his dream.  “At first, there are just softly-spoken words, but I can’t make them out. Then, the screaming comes. It sounds like a girl trying to stop whatever is about to happen.  She keeps yelling  _ No!   _ Someone is there with her and laughs this creepy, hissing laugh, and that’s when the green light appears.  I always wake up after that.”

 

Harry chanced a look up at his dad for a reaction to what he had said, only to find the man not looking at him at all.  Rather, his dad seemed to glare at the blackboard as if it had offended him, the muscle in his jaw working furiously. Unsure how to interpret that, Harry lowered his gaze back to the floor.

 

“Am I that someone with the girl?  About to do something terrible?” Though he didn’t look up, Harry could feel his dad’s dark, penetrating gaze on him.

 

“You are not.  Why would you think such a thing?”

 

Harry anxiously lifted a shoulder.  “I remember some doctors on the telly saying that these evil people - killers and such - always visualized their activities before doing them.  I just thought ... ”

 

A hand lifted Harry’s chin until he had no choice but to look his dad in the eye.  The mix of emotions currently expressed on the man’s face took Harry by surprise, never having seen that much of any  _ one  _ emotion showing, much less  _ multiple _ emotions.  Anxiety, puzzlement, fear, were present, but the one that nearly took Harry’s breath away was the ferocity of certainty underneath the others that shone in the man’s dark eyes.

 

“Son, you are nothing like them.  You have far too much compassion to turn into someone of that nature.”  His hand fell away, as did his gaze. “You should have been too young to remember.”

 

Though his dad had said that last comment to himself, Harry heard it.  “I’m remembering something? What could I possibly be remembering? The only thing bad ever happening was … ”  His eyes widened as the implication hit him. “I’m remembering …  _ it _ … aren’t I?  That night? But how?  I wasn’t even two!”

 

“Magic can be … unpredictable.  That particular night … much is not known.  We simply must accept what is until such time as things are revealed to us.”

 

Harry had to agree with his dad about the unpredictable nature of magic.  The professors wouldn't drill the necessity to enunciate the incantations if it weren't so.  As Professor Flitwick once told them, as simple as a letter switch could mean disaster.

 

“You sound sure that we'll understand everything.”

 

“Magic is ever-changing and evolving.   It is impossible to achieve that level of understanding.   I do believe, however, that we shall be given enough information to solve the riddle of that night's events.”

 

“Because of the prophecy, you mean.”  The heavy exhalation from his dad told Harry the man didn't like the idea any better than he, himself, did.

 

“How long has this nightmare plagued you?”

 

Harry fervently wished he had covered his reaction better.  He didn't want to see the disappointment in his dad's eyes when he learned just how long the nightmare had been occurring. It wasn't that he felt he _couldn't_ go  to his dad, it was that he just wanted to forget about the dream entirely. He looked up to find his dad watching him, suspicion in his narrowed gaze, the man's arms slowly folding over his chest.  Harry had learned that meant he'd better start speaking. 

 

“Since the beginning of the school year, but only once or twice until this last week. The first time was after the Sorting.  I felt this … twinge … tingle … something in my scar that night.”

 

“And you remained silent.”

 

The nearly-accusing tone brought a grimace to Harry's face, tears threatening.  “I'm sorry, Dad. I didn't think anything of it since it didn't really hurt and hasn't happened again.”  There came another heavy sigh, and it only served to make Harry feel worse about keeping things to himself.  One exhalation and the guilt would hit. It must be a parental thing because his mum could do that, too.

 

“Harry, look at me.  It is imperative that you speak of these occurrences when they transpire.  You will do so in the future. Am I understood?”

 

Solemnly, Harry nodded.  Before he could stop the words, he blurted, “You, too.”  He wanted to slap a hand over his mouth, but it was too late.  He couldn't take them back. So, Harry decided to own his statement and sat straighter, keeping his eyes on his dad almost defiantly.  He must have done something right because, in the next moment, one corner of his dad’s mouth curved upward.

 

“So I shall.  Some habits prove to be the most difficult to break, but break them we must.”

 

After a few moments of silence stretched between them, Harry was nearly relieved when his dad stood and returned the chair to its original position behind the desk, then removed whatever spells he had placed on the door and walls.  The heavy phase to their talk had to be over and would return to something lighter, like potions or some other aspect of school. Harry wanted to be certain, so he forced a change of topic himself as the two of them continued their wandering of the castle.

 

“With Quidditch starting soon, it’s made me think about how to get on the team for both Gryffindor and Slytherin.  Assuming I’m good enough to try-out and make it, of course.”

 

“And what have you settled upon?”

 

“Well, the only thing I can think of to make it fair is to play for one House one year and the next year, play for the other House.”

 

“An equitable solution.  Your next step would be to present your proposal to the Headmaster.”

 

The thought of speaking with Hogwarts’ Headmaster still filled Harry with anxiety.  Who  _ wouldn’t  _ be nervous approaching the great leader, the man Voldemort was known to fear?  Oh sure, he had been in the man’s presence a lot before school, but that was different.  This was speaking directly to him about an idea, and no one else would be there. His idea would either be accepted or denied depending on how well he presented his case.  That was enough to rattle anyone, wasn’t it? A gentle squeeze at the back of his neck startled Harry enough to look up at the man by his side. His dad had rarely initiated any sort of contact, and most certainly not in plain view of everyone.  Later, he would remember the two instances in which his dad had previously initiated contact before this moment. From the expression on his dad’s face, the man was nearly as startled as Harry had been.

 

“The Headmaster has done many great things, but he is still very much human.  He has made mistakes like the rest of us.”

 

Harry nodded pensively.  In other words, don’t look at the Headmaster as some wonderful celebrity icon but as a person.  It was how Harry had wanted others to see him. Not as a celebrity, not as the son of a former Death Eater, but as the person he was.  Easier said than done, of course, but true, nonetheless. Harry nodded again to indicate he understood his dad’s message.

 

“Thanks, Da-, er, sir.”  Harry winced slightly. “Sorry.”

 

“Our discussion is still private,” the man said with a small twist of his lips.

 

As they continued to stroll through the corridors, Harry found himself wishing his dad’s hand had remained where it had been despite understanding why it could not.  It had been so nice to have that little bit of fatherly contact. It had been explained to him that his dad was not an affectionately demonstrative person and why. Or, not overly demonstrative, at any rate, but Harry still craved the kind of relationship he knew other kids had with their fathers.  He longed for the hugs, the pats, the taps on the shoulders, the gentle hand in his hair in an effort to soothe him. It did no good to feel that way, but he did, nonetheless. Maybe if they had more talks like this one, another opportunity for some sort of physical contact between them would arise.

 

A plan began to formulate in Harry’s mind, slowing his steps.  Feeling anxious about what he was going to ask for, Harry pulled together every ounce of Gryffindor courage he possessed.  “This was nice. Being able to just talk like this. I know it’s asking a lot, because I know how busy you are, but would it be okay if we did it again?  Like once a month or something?” The tightening of his dad’s jaw sent Harry backpedaling, rejected and hurt that his dad didn’t feel the same about the time they had just spent together.  He focused on his feet, forcing a nonchalance into his voice he didn’t feel. “Or not. It’s fine.”

 

A hand on his shoulder guided him out of the center of the walkway, but he didn’t look up at the man in front of him - he hated feeling so needy - until he heard the first few hesitantly-spoken words.

 

“Harry, I … again … apologize.  I believe you have interpreted my … focus on my school duties as a … lack of interest in you.  That is not an impression I had intended. The father/son dynamic is not one in which I am well-versed, not having a positive role model to follow, and, therefore, will make some grievous errors.  Be certain of one thing, however. It is  _ not  _ too much to ask, and it would please me to set aside some time every month for a discussion.  That is not meant to be taken that you cannot come to me sooner if something were to arise.”

 

Joy spread through Harry as if it had been poured into his veins.  The smile that appeared on his face stretched from ear to ear. Seamus and Ron had been wrong!  His dad  _ did  _ want him around and  _ did  _ want to spend time with him!  Deep down, he'd known they had been, but a little voice in his head had insisted the opposite.  The best part was, the hand on his shoulder hadn't moved!  

 

Suddenly feeling bold, and more than a bit cheeky, Harry beamed up at his dad and asked, “Can I, er, may I ask you something?”  

 

“You may.”

 

Pursing his lips to hold back his laughter,  Harry settled himself before continuing. “Well, since you love Mum, and she loves you, does that mean you'll marry her?”

 

Five seconds of dead silence later, Harry let loose his amusement at his dad's comedic inability to utter a single word despite his jaw moving in the attempt.  Deciding retreat was the prudent course of action, Harry quickly bid his still speechless father goodbye and ran off to find Neville. This also called for a letter to Ginny. 

 

SSLE

 

Severus stood, absolutely speechless, as his eleven-year-old son laughed and ran.  Needless to say, that question had been the least expected from the boy. Despite himself, a crooked smile curved one corner of his mouth.

 

“The insolent little brat.”  

 

Severus meant it with much affection, of course.  Now that his mind could function properly again, he could appreciate the wholly Slytherin tactic of verbally disarming to ensure the upper hand and a dignified retreat.  Dignified, in this case, meaning not looking the fool. Remaining where he'd been left, Severus contemplated what his son had asked. Marriage? What in bloody hell had put  _ that _ into the boy's head?  Once upon a time, when he had been naive enough to believe in happily ever afters, he had thought that his and Lily's relationship had been heading down that road, but now?  Things were different now, were they not? More complicated. Would she even consider…? Severus shook away the thought. No, of course, she wouldn't. There were simply too many issues involved.  Best to not even entertain the idea, which was just as well, because Severus didn't, for a second, believe that was something he wanted.

 

An amused snicker broke into his thoughts, forcing Severs to realize he had been standing in the same spot, staring into space, for a few minutes.  Not something the reserved, decorous Potions Master wished to be caught doing. A steely glare in the two Hufflepuff third-year girls’ direction shut them up, sending them scurrying past him.  Satisfied his reputation had not been compromised, Severus shoved away all thoughts of that M-word, choosing to begin making his rounds while pondering what to do, or what could be done, regarding Quirrell and the man's questionable behavior.

 

Up on the sixth floor, in a lesser-known section of the castle, Severus heard a giggle emanate from one of the broom cupboards and sighed irritably.  If he had it his way, hormonal teens would be chaperoned at all times. No more having to hear things he would rather go his entire life without hearing.  They could give in to their baser needs  _ after  _ leaving Hogwarts.  Pointedly ignoring the visual of himself and Lily in a broom cupboard engaging in such activity - something he had fantasized about when younger and again since her return to his life - he purposefully strode to the door and banged the side of his fist against it.

 

“If you wish to avoid detention with me, I highly suggest you get yourselves together and exit that cupboard in less than five seconds.”

 

There was a half-second of silence.  “Oh, damn, it's Snape! He's been in a right foul mood lately.”

 

“And it is becoming more so the longer I am forced to wait.”

 

Scrambling from inside assured him they were complying, so Severus stepped back, crossed his arms, and scowled most menacingly.  Two seconds later, the teens all but fell over themselves attempting to leave the cupboard in a rush.

 

“Thirty points …   _ each  _ … from Ravenclaw.”

 

“But, Professor, that's sixty points total!”

 

Severus’ response dripped sarcastic disdain.  “Indeed? I had  _ no  _ idea.  It appears your time at Hogwarts has not been wasted as I had first believed.”  

 

He motioned for them to head back down the corridor in the direction he had come.  He waited until they were several feet away before turning to resume his patrol. Severus had no more than taken a single step when a murmured comment had his nostrils flaring in true anger.

 

“Mrs. Potter needs to open up and let him in.  If anyone needs the relief it's him.” The sixth-year's companion giggled.

 

On silent feet, one irate Potions Master stalked up to the meandering pair of students and clamped a hand onto the boy's shoulder, spinning him around.  “Detention, Mr. Stillwell and another thirty points from Ravenclaw.” Severus allowed a nasty smirk to slide onto his face. “Be prepared to get dirty. Come to my office after dinner tomorrow.  I advise you not to be late. Consider yourselves confined to your common room the remainder of the day except for dinner this evening.”

 

The boy looked ready to protest but his companion, at least, had the common sense to grab his arm and pull him off toward the staircase.  Whirling on his heel, cloak billowing behind him, Severus resumed his patrol, mentally pleading for someone to save him from overly amorous teens.  He swore, if Harry ever - That thought stopped Severus in his tracks. Harry was eleven years old. On his next birthday, the boy would be twelve - and at any moment could begin suffering through that frustrating and embarrassing time known as puberty.   _ That  _ meant a certain discussion would be warranted.  Severus nearly groaned aloud. No. He had months still.  He wouldn't think of that until absolutely necessary. 

 

One floor lower, Severus encountered Filius and knew from the diminutive professor’s stance that he wasn’t happy.  “Severus! Ninety points? I’ve heard from a couple of my students that you’ve taken  _ ninety _ points!”

 

Never one to appreciate his judgment being called into question, Severus scowled down at his colleague.  “Left my sight and immediately went whinging to you, did they? Did it not occur to you that there might have been an excellent reason for that points loss?  Did they bother explaining to you  _ how  _ they lost them?”  By the man’s expression, Severus knew they had not.  “Then, allow me to enlighten you. The two of them were in a broom cupboard, in a state of undress.”

 

The tiny professor’s cheeks reddened.  “Well, I must agree that discipline was called for, but ninety points, Severus?  And detention? That’s a little excessive.”

 

Severus’ once-favorite expression settled onto his face.  “Anything less would have taught them nothing. However, if you prefer to have disrespectful students who are too busy with the innocent children they so carelessly brought into this world that they are incapable of studying, that is your prerogative.”

 

“I must say that you tend to garner such an attitude from many of the students.”

 

Severus let out a disdainful laugh.  “I care not for what is said in regards to myself, for that is nothing new and long since lost its power over me.”

 

The Head of Ravenclaw House appeared puzzled for a moment, but he hadn’t been appointed Ravenclaw Head of House for nothing.  His face flushed, lips pressing together. “I see. May I ask what was said?”

 

“Consult with Mr. Stillwell.  My punishment stands.”

 

Filius nodded his agreement.  “Yes, it does. I will have a talk with the two of them.  Their attitudes towards the … other … professors, as well as their fellow students, will be adjusted or they will face the consequences.”

 

Arching an eyebrow, Severus couldn’t help but be somewhat amused.  “Hedging your bets, Filius?”

 

“Well, seeing as there are two people currently in the castle who would rouse your indignation on their behalf … yes.  This way, I’m completely covered. Either way, I will speak to them.”

 

Severus acknowledged the Charms professor’s capitulation with a nod.  “Good day, then.”  

 

Not waiting for a reply, Severus continued on.  The lack of sleep catching up to him, he had to stifle several yawns, which only served to make his countenance that much more intimidating.  He would have loved nothing more than to sleep away the afternoon, but that bordered on laziness in his opinion. He had duties to perform, and he had already neglected them once that day.  Was it just his fatigued state or were the students more … daring … than they used to be? Rarely in the past had any of them dared to show him any cheek. Oh, sure, they’d protest what they believed to be an unfair punishment, but outright disrespect to him directly?  No. Granted, Stillwell’s slur had been against Lily as much as it had been against himself and it hadn’t been said directly to him, but the boy had known he could be overheard. Was Lily and Harry’s presence changing him in their eyes? If that was the case, he could easily remedy that.  Darth Vader. Wasn’t that to whom Harry had compared him? He would gladly channel that character if it meant he kept his reputation intact.

 

A banging came from a classroom to his left, accompanied by manic laughter.  Severus groaned, heaving a sigh. He was in no mood to deal with Peeves. Debating as to whether he actually wanted to stop the poltergeist or, just this once, ignore him, said mischievous specter appeared in the corridor, spied him, and swooped over to him.

 

Not wishing to listen to any of the trickster’s taunts, Severus preempted the onslaught.  “Leave, Peeves. Now.”

 

“Oh!  Snipe-y, Snappy Snape-y!  Why you always so snippy?”

 

Clenching his teeth, Severus breathed deeply, hoping the ache he could fill building between his temples did not fully develop.  “Must I call for the Baron, Peeves?”

 

Before the poltergeist could formulate any sort of response, a deep, commanding voice that never failed to send shivers down Severus’ spine sounded behind him.  “Peeves. Be gone.”

 

Peeves halted his frenetic hovering and spinning to stammer, “Oh, yes, sir!  Right away, sir!” Almost instantly, he zoomed through the floor to cause havoc elsewhere.

 

Facing the impressive form of the Slytherin House ghost, Severus nodded his appreciation.  “Thane, your timing is impeccable as always.”

 

“Always willing to assist a Slytherin friend in need, Master Snape.  Why the Headmaster continues to allow that menace’s presence is beyond my comprehension.”

 

“Mine, as well.”  Severus rubbed at his forehead and sighed.  What he wouldn’t give for the day to be over!

 

Thane cocked his head to the side, studying the Potions Master with a penetrating stare.  “You look unwell. Is something weighing heavily upon you?”

 

Ducking into the classroom Peeves had vacated, Severus pulled his wand and proceeded to right the mischief the poltergeist had unleashed upon the furniture.  It didn’t surprise him in the least when he spotted the ghostly form of Thane appear through the wall. Severus and the Slytherin ghost had developed a friendship of sorts through the years.  During his first year at the castle, Severus had asked the one thing no one had ever asked of the apparition: his name. That had garnered the first-year student a bit of respect from the specter.  The year Severus had returned to teach, he had uncharacteristically confessed his sins to Thane, forging a friendship through mutual lamentations and understanding.

 

“Trouble with your lady love?  With your heir?”

 

“No longer.  It appears my past deeds no longer wish to remain in the past.”

 

“Ah.  I do believe I once warned you not to bury those memories.  Hide them not from your lady, for I have observed her closely and believe she shall help you.”

 

Severus let out a snort.  “Indeed, I have been admonished rather thoroughly for having done so.  She has … pulled from me … some of the things I have witnessed and done.”

 

“Excellent, my friend!  Let her, or you may find yourself alone once more.  Do not waste the second chance you have been given. You do not want to become like me, full of regrets and emptiness, desiring one more glimpse of my love's beautiful face, one more word in her melodious voice.”

 

“No, I do not.” 

 

 For a few minutes, Severus remained standing, contemplating what Thane had said.  He couldn't lose Lily again. He would never survive it, making him unfit to be Harry's father.   His son would be whisked away to some other family, to be taught someone else's ideas. No matter how ashamed he felt, the past needed to be re-lived through a discussion with Lily.  His victims deserved that much. Harry's parting shot came to mind. Their lives were complicated enough without adding marriage into the mix. Most importantly, he didn't feel worthy of her.  Perhaps he never would. Marriage wouldn't change anything. It wouldn't make it easier to dredge up the nastiness of the last war. It wouldn't magically convince Harry to willingly confide in him.  So, what would be the point? The point? The point would be to express his love for Lily, to make the two of them and Harry a true family. However, marriage wasn't necessary for that. Besides, he no longer wished to participate in that particular institution.  Things were fine as they stood.

 

“Come to any conclusions, my friend?”

 

The unexpected question jolted Severus out of his musings, having forgotten Thane was still in the room.  “I have been given much to ponder. My apologies for having ignored you.”

 

“Yes, it can be unsettling when the children prove to be wiser than the adults.”

 

Severus scowled at the amused ghost.  “My spell prevented eavesdropping.”

 

“You forget, I am no longer living.  There is very little magic that can affect me.”

 

Severus sighed heavily.  He  _ had  _ forgotten that.  But then, he hadn't expected Thane to wander far from the dungeons, either.  “What my son said is irrelevant.”

 

The Slytherin ghost’s expression grew solemn and full of pity.  “Then, you are more the fool than I would have believed. Good day, Master Snape.”

 

The Slytherin ghost, known to all but one as The Bloody Baron, melted through the opposite wall from which he entered, leaving behind an irritated Potions Master.

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  



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